by D. Breeze
We’d been living in the apartment above the garage since he came out of hospital and I adored it. It was so cute and homely. Tiny, but big enough for us and I never wanted to leave.
My mother didn’t have a funeral, no one would have gone anyway, not even me, so she was just cremated and her ashes were returned to me by courier.
Urgh, I’d hate to be the guy who made that delivery.
But I just emptied them in the back garden and threw the jar away.
Some people might think it was harsh, and honestly, she’d have deserved it, but it wasn’t harsh. I will never know what was truly wrong with her to make her act the way she did, but she was mentally ill and I knew she had no control over her own mind at all at the end. So I left her where she felt secure. At home.
I could never live with her ashes being in the house, like some sort of shrine to her, so I did the next best thing. I was proud of myself, for thinking of everyone involved, and I did what I thought was best. I’d never change my mind about that.
So we were moving into my childhood home. Although, as I found out a few weeks before, the house was still in my dad’s name but he didn’t want the house back. He had his own place and his own life. He told us we could live there for as long as we wanted.
A part of me thought maybe he didn’t want the memories of what had happened there to be in his face every day, for which I couldn’t blame him. But it wasn’t even the same house anymore, Cheryl and Malcolm had worked all the spare hours they could on transforming it into a beautiful family home, and I couldn’t wait to go back. I never had a special attachment to the place, I wouldn’t have cared if it had been torn down, but actually having my own house at eighteen was more than I ever could have imagined.
I didn’t think it would be easy. I wasn’t that naive, we would still have bills to pay and a house to take care of, but Jamie had a trust fund and I had eleven thousand pounds left to me when my mother died.
No, I don’t know where the money came from, or why she let us struggle if she had that saved in a separate account, but I also didn’t care. . The lawyers said it may have been left over from an insurance settlement from years before, I guess I’d never know for certain. It wasn’t much, but it was something. The money was perfect for us to start our lives together and I was going to enjoy every penny of that money.
~*~*~*~*~*~
“Abbi’s here babe.” Jamie called from the lounge and I grinned. I loved having a friend. And she was, a true, amazing friend.
I kissed him briefly on the lips and enjoyed his frustrated groan when I slid away from his wondering hands, I’d never go anywhere if he had his way. Honestly, it would probably be my way too if I didn’t have important things to do.
“Love you, honey.”
“Love you too, Pretty girl.”
And I left.
Abbi’s car was a tin can. Literally. I couldn’t really tell what colour it had originally been seeing as it was covered in rust patches and she’d tried to, unconvincingly, cover them with flower stickers.
She was such a contradiction. Punky, gothic, badass girl – driving a car covered in flowers...weird.
“Hey girl!” she sang as soon as I got in the car.
“Hey. You’re sure you’re ok to help me find something good today yeah?” I asked, for about the hundredth time. She just rolled her eyes.
She was silent for a few minutes, then out of nowehere, she asked me who Jamie’s brother was.
“His brother? You mean his twin? Harvey Travis. Why?”
I felt the temperature in the car rise as she clenched her jaw and her neck turned red. I could see her trying to control the temper and I wondered what he’d done. She took a deep breath.
“Did I ever tell you about my sister?”
I shook my head. “No, just that you had one and that she’s nothing like you. Why?” I asked, sounding as confused as I was at the change in subject.
“She didn’t used to be anything like me, no. She was one of those popular bitches. You know the ones? They think they own the world and everyone in it. Put everyone down to make themselves feel better. Pretty much pure evil, disguised in the body of a stupid teenage bitch?” I nodded. Candace, down to a tee. “Couple of months ago, maybe three. I dunno, a while ago...she changed. She got quieter, she went out less. She didn’t smile, didn’t laugh. You’ve got to remember, I don’t hardly ever stay at home really, and even I’d noticed the changes. I may not like her very much, but I do love her. She’s family. So I got her talking, asked her what was going on. You wanna know what she said?”
I wasn’t sure she wanted an actual response, but I nodded again anyway. I wanted to know everything, she still looked seriously angry.
“She says that she doesn’t have any friends anymore. That she’s been cast out by all her little followers because she’s in love with the top bitches guy. Now, I can see the light dawning in your eyes...I’m guessing you can finish what I’m going to say, my sister is...”
“Mikaela” I whispered.
“Ding, ding, ding. We have a winner. Spot on my friend...”
“But, her surname’s Smith.”
Abbi snorted. “No it isn’t. She’s a Royal. She just didn’t want to be associated with me in school. At all. So she lied. Her I.D and her birth certificate say Royal.”
“Why would she do that?”
“Well girl, let me you tell you a story. See, there’s this girl, let’s call her...Alice. So Alice is just a normal fifteen year old girl, nothing special about her, nothing different. Just, a girl. Then Alice meets...Jack. And she thinks Jack is her knight in shining armour, he buys her little presents and gives her flowers, tells her how hot she is. A month passes and Alice and Jack are seen everywhere together, and Jack tells Alice he loves her and wants to take things to the next level...”
I gulped, knowing where the story was going. Poor Alice.
“Alice isn’t ready. Not even a little bit. She’s nervous, and scared. But she loves Jack and he tells her that it’ll make him happy, that all the other kids are doing it and she wants to fit in with his friends more than anything. So she does it. It hurt like fuck...Um, Alice said it hurt like fuck. He didn’t go slow, or gentle, even though he knew it was her first time. He fucked. That’s it. The next fucking day, he says it’s not working for him, he says he’s too young to be tied down and he’s breaking up with her. She was devastated. A week or so later, she’s getting notes in class calling her a whore, and learns that it was a bet. A fucking bet because he’d told some other dick-wipe, that he could nail her. So not only was she heartbroken, but she was humiliated, and her only sister, who nobody really knew at the time because she was only thirteen, changed her name. Said it was too embarrassing to be associated with her – so she was going to ‘faze her out’. The people who knew her back then, obviously know the truth, but even they use her ‘new name’ now.”
“Wow...” I whispered on a breath. “That’...that’s...shoot, I don’t even know what that is. It’s messed up. Poor Alice.”
She shrugged. “Yeah, poor Alice.”
“So, um why did Harvey’s name make you so angry? I know that he could have been more careful with her feelings, but it’s not really his fault that she loves him.”
Whoa! I shocked myself. Defending Harvey? Huh. I did not see that coming.
“Oh girl, you are too cute. I don’t give a shit that they were fucking when he didn’t really give a shit about her. That’s her own stupid fault for falling for someone like him. Everyone knows he’s a dickhead. I’m not angry, I’m fucking raging. I’m so fucking mad that I swear I could cause him bodily harm...” I flinched. “Shit sorry, I wouldn’t actually do it, but I want to. It’s not him fucking her that’s pissed me off...it’s what he did afterwards.”
I had a very bad feeling about what she was going to say, but I asked anyway.
“What did he do to her?”
She glanced at me from the driver’s seat. Indecision was written al
l over her face.
“Not sure I should tell you, but fuck it. She only went and got herself knocked up didn’t she? Stupid fuck...”
“Oh my gosh! Harvey’s going to be a dad?!” I screeched and she winced.
“Calm yourself. No that rat-bastard ain’t gonna be a dad. She had an abortion. Fucking murdered an innocent baby because he forced her to.” I opened my mouth but didn’t get chance to interrupt her. “Don’t you dare defend him. I know, and I’m guessing that you know, no one can force you to do anything you don’t really want to. But he did threaten her, told her he was gonna ruin her life and she’d be a single mum at eighteen because he wasn’t having anything to do with a ‘bastard’ kid. His words. He told her she was nothing but a whore and that no one would even know if the kid was his. Fuck Ree-Ree, he broke her. She did what he told her to do and she still had her life ruined anyway. She’s a stupid fuck for going through with it if it wasn’t really what she wanted, no woman should put a man before her child, her own flesh and blood. But him, I fucking hate him. He’s running around pretending nothing ever happened, not suffering slightly, and she’s breaking down because it’s finally hit home exactly what she’s done. She can never take it back.”
Not something I’d ever said, but right then, I think I turned into Jamie.
“Holy. Fucking. Shit...I don’t, I don’t even know what to say to that. That’s, it’s...there are no words. I can’t believe that. It’s so wrong.”
“You’re damn fucking right it’s wrong. I’m gonna make him pay.”
Oh no. I did not want to be put in the middle of any other situations, whether it directly involved me or not. If it affected Harvey, it affected Jamie and if it affected Jamie, it affected me. There was no way around it. I couldn’t tell her not to do anything, he did deserve punishing I suppose. But then, at the same time, Mikaela has her own mind.
She should have stood up for her unborn child, no matter the consequences for her. I’m not judgemental, if she really felt she could not give a baby the life it deserved, then that’s her decision, but to do it because she was worried about what other people would think of her – that’s just so completely wrong.
I was disgusted. With both of them.
It hit me out of nowhere, that’s why Harvey had his car accident, the field, the vision, a crying Mikaela...the crash. It all made sense. I shook my head at the injustice of it all, so much havoc, from one small mistake. And no, I don’t mean the abortion was a mistake, I mean the fact that she got pregnant at all.
Neither of them deserved to be the creators of a miracle.
Chapter Eighteen
Release
Town was packed.
It was so busy; I was getting more and more frustrated with every step I took. I knew it would be, being as it was so close to Christmas but I didn’t think it would be quite as bad as it was.
If I wasn’t with Abbi, I’d have gone home. She was hilarious, and typically, a badass.
“Get out the way! Jesus, what is this? A fucking funeral march? We’ll all get done quicker if you all just move a little bit fucking faster!” she shouted over the crowds. I gasped and then giggled quietly, she was so crazy. People gave her annoyed looks and I heard a few people muttering profanities at her but she ignored them.
No one moved any faster.
Three hours later and we were making our way back to the car, my arms were loaded with bags and Abbi had a new piercing...so did I! She’d dragged me in with her and made me watch. I would have anyway, it was fascinating. She had way too many for me to count and she said she had ones in places I couldn’t even imagine. That did not surprise me.
She said she only wanted to get ‘a small piercing’ done, not sure I could have knowingly gone in with her if she’d have been getting her intimate area done. Then she showed me her nipples. Fact. Right there, in the middle of the piercing studio – which was also a tattoo place – she whipped up her top and showed me.
She had a silver bar through one nipple, with pink crystal spikes on the end. Someone cleared their throat and I looked up, turning a deep shade of red when I realised I’d been staring for so long. I knew I wanted to watch her have the other one done, even if it was a little weird.
They were so daring, so beautiful, so...not me.
She said I should get something done, I considered it, it would be pretty cool.
And I’m not ashamed to admit that I cried like a freaking baby. The. Whole. Time.
It hurt so much that I honestly thought I’d pass out. I didn’t though, thankfully.
That much pain, and I’d only had my trachea done. So it seems I don’t have a very high pain threshold and piercings are not really my thing. Abbi on the other hand, was incredible, she didn’t even flinch. It fascinated me, how she could completely switch off to any pain.
She was a badass. I loved her.
~*~*~*~*~
Pulling up outside the house, I turned to Abbi to say thanks for taking me, when I noticed her eyes weren’t focused on me.
I followed her line of vision and cringed. Harvey was standing on the doorstep, kissing the life out of some poor girl, hands on her bum, grinding against her like it wasn’t completely obvious that they’d just had sex.
Disgusting. She didn’t know what she was getting herself into, yet.
He’d only been out of his wheelchair for a couple of days and he’d already managed to get some girl round to do the dirty with him.
Before I could stop her, Abbi jumped out of the car and was storming towards them.
Oh no!
I scrambled out after her but I wasn’t quick enough. Not by a long shot.
The girl screeched as Abbi pulled her away from Harvey by her arm and shoved her onto the lawn. I wasn’t sure why Abbi pushed the girl, it wasn’t her fault, but she was on a mission. I knew all about those.
She got right in Harvey’s face and spat on him. That was vile, I grimaced. Then she back-handed him across the face and kicked him in the groin. I knew I had to do something when he curled into a ball on the floor, crying out about too many crazy assed women in the world.
Wrong, wrong thing to say.
She screamed.
Literally, just screamed at the top of her lungs and started pounding on him. I realised she still hadn’t told him why she was beating the crap out of him and for once, I took it upon myself to intervene.
I ran straight in between them and pushed her back. Her mouth fell open and she looked like I had just lost my mind. I knew I was the only sane one there.
“Jamie...!” I screeched as loud as I could, hoping he was in the house instead of the apartment so he could hear me.
Then, before he came, I turned my back on Abbi and looked at Harvey. He’d managed to get himself up to his knees so I took my opportunity. I swung my hand out, and smacked him across the face with a strength that I didn’t even know I was capable of.
His head flicked to the side and saliva flicked from his mouth. Abbi must have thought I was just joining in with her because she instantly moved to the side of me and climbed on top of him, open-palm slapping him over and over again.
Within seconds, the front door was flung open and my Jamie stood there looking worried. He checked me from head to toe, but must have noticed that I was fine because his shoulders dropped and he turned his eyes to the idiots still grappling on the floor.
I thought he’d rush in and save his brother. That is not what happened.
He tilted his head to the side and studied them with a bewildered, if not slightly amused look on his face. He actually stepped over Harvey’s legs and walked to me. He slung his arm around my shoulders and bent his head to whisper in my ear.
“What did he to deserve this?”
Not ‘is your friend crazy?’ Not ‘why is that girl beating the crap out of my brother?’...but ‘what did he do to deserve this?!’
I looked up at him, mouth agape. He shrugged and I shook my head. Oh he knew Harvey better than anyone and eve
n he wasn’t surprised.
“You’ll find out in a minute, I’m not sure you even want to know though.”
I was not disappointed. Abbi, the badass-chick she was, lay it all out for him.
“Now listen here you stupid fucking little prick...” Not sure you could really call Harvey ‘little’ but still... “You are the worst kind of person ever to grace this fucking planet and I hate you with every bone in my body. You fucked over the wrong person and you’re gonna pay for it. My sister is a thousand times the person you are and I hope to hell she wakes up one day and ruins you. You’d deserve it. You...are...a...fucking...murderer.” She ended with a swift punch to the face and stopped.
“You’re a what?!” Jamie yelled.
Uh oh!
With Abbi still sitting on top of him, Harvey held his hands up like he was surrendering.
“Bro, I am not a fucking murderer! Get this crazy bitch off me!” he touched his bleeding lip and looked at Abbi. “Damn, you hit like a fucking guy.”
She looked like she was going to hit him again, then she frowned and wiggled slightly, then came the screech that only dogs could hear.
“You have got to be fucking kidding me! You’re hard? What the fuck is wrong with you!”
He was wha...?
Oh my gosh! Completely inappropriate timing, but I giggled, then Jamie chuckled and my giggle turned into a full-blown belly laugh. He was hard when she was hitting him, and he’d just been kicked in the balls! That guy really did have issues.
“Well yeah! You’re crazy, no doubt about it, but you’re hot and you’re straddling me. What did you think was going to happen?” he asked, like it was a perfectly normal thing for a guy to get aroused when he was being attacked.
Maybe it was?
I glanced up at Jamie and, as if he could read my mind, he just muttered, “No babe.” Then he decided to fix things.
“Right, girl, get off him. Stand up and behave like fucking adults...” He held his hand out and she took it, but added an extra kick to Harvey’s ribs as she got up. Jamie gave her a look which she ignored, then batted her eye-lashes like she was innocent.
