As soon as Ellie felt that she’d managed to chatter at the kitchen table long enough not to hurt Alexis’s mother’s feelings, she lied and said that Fiona had invited her to come over to do homework together. In truth, Ellie just needed to get some reassurance from Fiona; she’d decided that even false optimism was better than none. Plus, she could use a walk in the wintry air to clear her head.
Ellie tromped through a series of small snowdrifts in the park near the Bixbys’ house. She tried to keep her thoughts light by focusing on the scenery. From a distance, the windblown crests of accumulated snow looked like frozen waves. Up close, however, the pattern of dips and crests was littered with footprints and spackled with mud and black soot.
My worst nightmare is my permanent reality. But I can’t spend the rest of my life feeling sorry for myself. Things could be worse.
She tried to think of a worse scenario than what had already happened to her. She supposed she could have awakened in the body of someone who lived in a completely foreign-to-her world where she didn’t understand the customs or language. Or she could be minus Fiona, whose friendship was the glue that held Ellie together.
As she crossed the street, she spotted a black sedan at the intersection a block away. She couldn’t see the license plate or the driver at this distance. Her mind flashed to the black car she’d seen pulling away from Alexis’s house a few days ago.
What if that was the man who’d told her that her life depended on pretending to be Alexis? She had to speak to him! That was her only hope of ever figuring out what was going on!
The car was waiting to make a left turn. Ellie ran down the sidewalk toward the intersection. She gained a little ground by cutting through someone’s yard. Virginia license plates! A male driver!
She ran into the street as far as she dared and waved her arms. “Stop!”
A car behind her honked. The driver of the black car had to have looked back; he had to have seen her! He drove away. Winded and frustrated, she whipped her backpack off her shoulder, sorely tempted to hurl it into a tree. She could have run faster, if only she hadn’t been weighted down.
“Damn it!” The guy wakes me up in the hospital, tells me my life’s in danger, then follows me at a distance! Yet he already knows I’m in someone else’s body! What kind of a jackass would taunt me like this!
Ellie trudged back to Fiona’s house and rang the doorbell. A moment later, Fiona opened the door. She’d clearly been crying. As Ellie opened the glass outer door, Fiona grimaced and blotted her eyes with her sleeves as she held the inner door for her. “Allie. Hi.” She mustered an apologetic grin. “Sorry to greet you like this. I assumed you were a door-to-door solicitor. I was just going to growl ‘No’ at him and shut the door in his face.”
Ellie stepped inside and shed her backpack. “What’s wrong?” She studied Fiona’s features as she removed her parka and draped it over her backpack.
Fiona was avoiding her gaze and blushing. “I’d . . . rather not answer.”
“Why? Is it about me?”
Fiona sank onto the living room couch, shooting Ellie the briefest of glances. “This isn’t your fault, Allie. I mean . . . it just isn’t. I’m doing my best . . . trying to play along, to pretend that I think you’re Alexis. But . . . you’re not her. It’s no use.”
Her heart pounding, Ellie took a seat on the stuffed chair adjacent to the sofa.
“Alexis and I have been in classes together since kindergarten. She’d stare out the nearest window a lot. She seemed to be spacing out, but then she’d share some observation about robins’ feathers or squirrels’ behavior. Or she’d point out some pattern of crisscrossing shadows that looks like the Eiffel Tower. She was really observant with people, too. Even when we were just kids. I remember one time I was whining about a nasty remark another girl made at lunch, and Alexis said: ‘She’s upset about her parents. Didn’t you notice she was eating PB&J? That means her step-mom made her sandwich. Her step-mom never remembers that she hates jelly.’” Fiona dabbed at her eyes again. “Alexis could spend a week getting a square-inch of sky the perfect shade of blue, but crack a book for a midterm? Never.” She shook her head and studied Ellie’s features. “No case of amnesia can explain how you’ve turned into an academic whiz.”
“Nobody else has realized that. Not even Alexis’s parents.”
“Because they’re not looking hard enough to actually see you. If you’d woken up in Gayla’s or Savannah’s body, though, Alexis would have seen through your act in five minutes.” Her eyes filled with tears. “I don’t know why you had to—” Fiona broke off and averted her gaze.
Ellie was certain that Fiona had stopped short of complaining about her having wound up invading Alexis’s body, rather than someone else’s. “I didn’t choose for this to happen,” Ellie said in a half whisper.
“I know you didn’t. I like you. Alexis would’ve liked you, too. And vice versa. But I can’t stop missing her. And it’s killing me to have to pretend that you’re her.”
I’ve wrecked Fiona’s life! “I’m so sorry. I feel like the world’s worst trespasser.”
“You’re not a trespasser.”
“Sure I am. I’ve taken over your friend’s body.”
“But, like you said, it isn’t like you any choice in the matter.”
“No, I sure didn’t. And I’m stuck here now.”
“I can’t even imagine what you’re going through.” She stuffed an errant lock of her black hair behind her ear. “Just . . . forget everything I said, okay? It was all stupid. I should be so grateful that this happened instead of feeling sorry for myself. I could’ve been attending Alexis’s funeral today, instead of whining about how you’re this really cool, smart girl who just doesn’t happen to actually be Alexis.”
Ellie didn’t know how to respond. She understood how Fiona must feel, but Fiona’s sadness over missing Alexis truly did make her feel even worse.
“Sorry.” Fiona dried her eyes and gave Ellie a small smile. “Anyway. It’s good that you’re here. My mom’s going to be home any minute. Can you stay for dinner?”
“No, thanks.” Ellie rose. “I was just going for a walk and thought I’d drop in for a sec. Alexis’s parents will be starting to worry about . . . me.”
“Well, but, you just got here,” Fiona protested. “We can watch a movie. We could both use a good comedy. Or there’s bound to be a reality-TV show on that we can make fun of.”
Ellie donned her coat and slung her backpack over one shoulder. “I’m going to head home.” Not that it’s really my home.
“Okay. Well. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Fiona walked to the door with her. As Ellie started to let herself out, Fiona said, “Hey, Allie?”
She looked back.
“Even though you’re not Alexis, you’re still my best friend.”
“You barely know me.”
“I know you pretty well, actually,” Fiona said with a shrug. “We spent those ten hours in my car together.”
“I was crying for five of those hours.”
She spread her arms. “What better way to bond is there than a good cry?” she teased.
Ellie felt a smidge better. “Thanks, Fiona. You’re really my only friend right now.”
They gave each other a hug. “Things will get better,” Fiona said. “Statistically, they kind of have to. We’ll figure this out.”
Ellie nodded and left. She felt miserable as she slowly cut through the park once more. The temperature was dropping. She could see her breath in the cold air. She didn’t want to go to the Bixbys’ house. She didn’t want to go anywhere. She wanted to get hit by a lightning bolt and drop dead on the spot.
Contemplating the idea of sitting down in the snow till she could collect herself, she stopped. She heard a footstep behind her and whirled around.
It’s him! She recognized his dark hair and athletic build. He was wearing a solid grey sweatshirt and jeans. He promptly stopped and turned away, pretending that he’d spotted so
mething of interest in the miniature snow drift beside him. She studied him for a moment, trying to gauge if there was any possibility whatsoever that this was the murderer. There wasn’t. The man in the ski mask had been much bulkier.
Ellie’s temper flared as the man kept his face turned. He was still unwilling to speak to her!
You want to play “cat and mouse” with me? Game on!
Ellie picked up her pace. She sneaked a glance back and could tell that he was once again following her. She veered off from her diagonal path through the park and headed toward a copse of evergreens a short distance away. Calculating that the trees would block the man’s view of a street where she could easily exit the park, she sprinted the last several yards, then ducked behind a tree. If he was determined to keep her in his sights, he’d have to either follow her or out-wait her.
There were numerous paths through the snow where other people had walked among these trees; he wouldn’t be able to easily identify which footprints were hers. Ellie stood motionless, listening for his footsteps through the crunchy snow, hoping that he’d follow her.
After several minutes, she heard footsteps. Timing her own steps, she raced around the tree. She ran up behind him and smacked him in the back of his head as hard as she could with her backpack.
He staggered from the blow and dropped to his knees. “Hey! I wasn’t going to hurt you!”
She stood there, panting, and braced herself, fully prepared to crack him in the head a second time. “Who are you? Why are you following me?”
“I’m a medical researcher. I just wanted to make sure you were all right.”
“Are you a lab assistant at the hospital?”
“No, a neuroscientist.”
Skeptical, she gave him a visual once-over. “How old are you? Eighteen? Nineteen?”
“Twenty. I’d have gotten my MD and my PhD by now if I’d stayed at Johns Hopkins.”
She snorted. “So you graduated high school at twelve?”
“Fifteen, actually.”
The way he snarled the words at her made her believe that he’d had to answer that question a thousand times already. “And did Johns Hopkins teach you to check up on patients by stalking them?”
He hesitated. “I don’t know how to answer that.”
“Try telling me the truth, jerkface!”
“I already did. At the hospital. I should have left well enough alone.” He rubbed his head where Ellie had struck him. “This was stupid of me. They might have followed me.”
“They?” Ellie repeated, scared now that he really did have a good reason for his actions.
“This has to do with an invention to digitize neural signals in the brain so that they can be restored in patients with progressive memory loss. Or at least, that’s its intended use.”
Ellie was temporarily stunned into silence. “But this . . . device was misused on me?”
He nodded.
“Why didn’t any of my doctors or nurses tell me that?”
“None of them knew. I’ve never worked at Albany General. I used to do Alzheimer’s research at a medical center in Washington, D.C.”
“So what does that have to do with me…a high school senior in Philadelphia? Or with Alexis Bixby, in a coma, in a hospital in Albany?”
“Your anonymity was the whole point. Or rather, your tenuous connection was the reason you were targeted.”
“I don’t understand. What are you talking about?”
He rubbed the back of his head again and smirked at her. “For a skinny girl, you can swing a mean backpack.”
“Is that supposed to be cute?” Ellie cried. “Am I supposed to find you charming?”
“No. I . . . I wasn’t expecting to be talking to you. I guess I was hoping to figure out how to introduce myself.”
“Who are you? What do you know about Ellie Montgomery?”
“I’m Jake Greyland. We met last May in Washington, when I interviewed you for a summer internship with my research team at ABTC . . . at the Alzheimer’s and Brain Trauma Center. I couldn’t hire you because you weren’t old enough.”
She shook her head, remembering that internship interview eight months ago. “No, I remember my interview clearly.” The wunderkind who’d interviewed her was kind of cute—in a geeky sort of way—but nothing like the handsome, athletic man in front of her. “I’d never met you until two weeks ago when—” She broke off, too staggered at her realization to continue. The interviewer’s name had been Jake Greyland.
“When I came into your hospital room and awakened you,” Jake said, completing her sentence. “That was me you met, eight months ago, before Dr. McGavin transferred my brain patterns.” He held her gaze. “I’m occupying someone else’s body. Just like you are.”
Chapter 9
Ellie stared at him, worried that this was some kind of a trap. “You’re the person who interviewed me for a research internship?”
“Yes. I was in an accident about two months ago. A fatal accident, as far as the rest of the world knows. I’d been developing a device for the Alzheimer’s half of the research center and had twenty prototypes built of my invention. This is a massive simplification, but it digitizes the various neural impulses so that its function is similar to a flash-drive for the brain.”
“You invented the device that did this to me?” Ellie asked, leery. He could be anyone—a crazed mental patient, perhaps.
“Yes, but my intention was that it be used exclusively on Alzheimer’s patients to restore their memories. I didn’t realize that Jennifer and Ethan McGavin had hijacked my invention. That they were doing experiments on the comatose patients in the brain-trauma wing. They use it to erase the patients’ memories, then replace them with someone else’s.”
Ellie’s thoughts were reeling. “The married doctors who run the Center—the McGavins—did this to you . . . put your mind into another person’s brain?”
“Ethan McGavin,” Jake said with a nod.
My God, Ellie thought. I’m not alone in this nightmare after all! “And then he put my mind into Alexis Bixby’s brain?”
Jake winced and replied, “Well, technically, I did that . . . in order to save your life.”
Ellie felt as if she’d been sucker punched. “What do you mean ‘technically?’”
“There was a comatose Jane Doe at ABTC in the room right next to mine. The McGavins were going to transfer your mind into her brain. When you awoke in her body, they’d have run their tests on you, then killed you. Just like they’d planned to killed me.”
“They didn’t kill you, though. So how could you know they were going to kill me?”
“I discovered that they’d killed their previous six human guinea pigs. I was the exception . . . temporarily. Only because I had enough insider’s knowledge to figure out what was happening to me from the moment I awoke in this body. I knew at once that I had to pretend that the procedure hadn’t been entirely successful . . . that they’d keep me alive for further testing only if I deliberately flunked their IQ tests. Then I pretended to slowly improve, which—”
“You stole my brain’s flash drive and transferred its contents into Alexis’s brain instead of Jane Doe’s,” Ellie cried. “Why didn’t you stop them? Save my father’s life? Save me from being shot?”
“I couldn’t! I could barely walk when the shootings occurred, and I was basically being held captive at ABTC. They prevented me from—”
“Who killed my dad?”
“Some goon hired by ABTC. He shot you, too, then used my device to upload your mind into one of my devices. Your father was just collateral damage. They set up the crime scene to look like a botched burglary. The shooter probably didn’t think your father was home. But they wouldn’t have cared if he was.”
“How do you know that? Do you have someone helping you on the inside?”
“No. It’s deductive reasoning. Your father was shot through the head. You were shot through the torso, in the right quadrant in order to avoid hitting your
heart, so that you wouldn’t die instantaneously. The hired killer would have been under direct orders not to shoot anywhere near your head. That’s because the contents of your brain were their target.”
Ellie’s thoughts were racing, trying to keep up and put the clues together. “Dr. McGavin’s assistant told me to take that ridiculously long exam as part of my application,” she recalled. “That was just to test my answers before and after the . . . mind-transfer procedure?”
“Right,” Jake said.
“Which means my father is dead, simply because I applied for a freaking summer job. And because, unbeknownst to me, it was a company from hell . . . located in another city. Where no criminal investigation would ever trace such a bizarre, tenuous connection.”
“Exactly.”
But Jake Greyland intentionally put my mind into another girl’s brain. “Why did you do this to me?!”
“I saved your life!”
“You should have let me die! What right did you have to do any of this? And then to tell me about it? I saw my father get shot to death! Now I know it was because of me! Now I know that Alexis Bixby died in my place! That I’ve stolen her life! How am I supposed to cope with that?!”
He grimaced and raked his hand through his dark hair. “It’s bitter cold out here,” Jake said. “Can we go someplace warm, where we can sit down and talk?”
“No! I’m never going to sit down and chat over coffee and cupcakes and whatever the hell you think you can do to sugar-coat this!”
“Fine. We’ll sit on a park bench. Just give me five minutes to explain.”
She had never in her life hated anyone as much as she hated this man—except for the man in the ski mask.
Maybe Jake was his partner, here to finish the job. Ellie weighed her options. Part of her still longed for the lightning bolt to strike her dead. She gestured for him to lead the way.
Jake strode toward the nearest bench, which was facing the small playground. He pulled the hood over his wind-tussled hair and took a seat. She sat down at the opposite end of the small fake-wood bench. It struck Ellie as enormously unfair that he’d wound up looking so hot. He should have had his soul moved into a disgustingly ugly body.
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