“Sadie. We are here to help you.” Another female voice.
My body vibrated as an animalistic growl filled the room. Was that from me? I didn’t know what the HPC had planned for me, but I was done. My Talent had evolved here in the white room and although I didn’t know if I could harm a norm, I was willing to try.
“We need to sedate her.” A masculine voice joined the conversation. “Her pheromones are tainted with fear. She doesn’t recognize us at this moment and if we engage, she will attack.”
“What did they do to her?”
“I’m not sure, but if we don’t sedate her she will drain one of us. Look at her, she looks like a caged animal.”
“Stay back,” I screamed. A part of me recognized the voices, but I just couldn’t process what I was seeing. The white room finally won. The rational part of my brain, the one that usually dominated, was just an insignificant voice in the back of my mind.
A golden man inched forward, “We won’t hurt you, Sadie.” Another growled escaped my throat as I lunged for him. He held his arms out in self-defense before a sharp sting in my butt made me howl. My vision blurred as I fell forward. The ever-present vibration of my Talent dulled as strong arms wrapped around my waist.
Through pin-hole vision, I saw mauve eyes. “Kian,” I whispered, before sinking into his strong arms. The hallucinations were real this time and I reveled in the feel of his touch before the darkness took over.
My throat felt tight as awareness flooded my mind. I tried to move, but my muscles wouldn’t respond to the command. I was trapped inside my own body. The astringent smell of hospital and steady mechanical beeps were overwhelming my deprived system. I wanted to leave. I wanted to wake up and move, but nothing happened.
The beeping became erratic until an alarm went off outside of the room. Not two seconds after the alarm started blaring, the door slammed open and I heard voices.
“What’s happening, Nurse Bennett?” Kian’s voice was strained and scratchy as if he had been yelling. My soul leapt at his voice. I must be dead and this some torturous purgatory.
Silence followed his question as I heard movement near my head. I felt the gentle breeze of another body passing by my opposite side before thin, warm hands wrapped around my inactive one.
If I am dead, how can I feel?
“Beverly, tell us something.” Mrs. LaMotte’s voice was soft as she squeezed my hand. Anxiety clawed at my throat.
What the hell is going on here?
“Let go of her hand, Cecile. You’re making it worse,” Nurse Bennett hissed. “Everything is fine except a little tachycardia.”
“Any improvement?” Kian asked.
“Physically she’s fine now. However, we don’t know what her mental state will be, but we cannot treat her like we did before. She will have to visit with a psychiatrist. If what I read in the report is true, she may never be okay.”
I’m alive!
“I’m going to kill Dean Kerrington and every single norm who tortured her.” I could almost feel the malice in Kian’s voice.
“None of that here. What if she could hear you?” Nurse Bennet clucked as I felt her sure hands examine the areas that held my most prominent injuries. I noticed her touch didn’t hurt.
They must have healed me again.
“Beverly, when do you think she will wake up? The council…”
“Damn the council!” Kian interrupted her. “They can wait until she’s ready for their mediation.”
“We have no control over when they will summon her, but you know as well as I do that they will want to see her as soon as possible. The earlier she wakes up, the quicker we can get her the help she will need to handle what will come.”
“It is up to her when she wakes up. She was there for a month and we have no idea what all she has been through. Her body is mostly healed. We installed a feeding tube and she’s getting the nutrients she desperately needs, but I cannot heal her mind.” I felt Nurse Bennett’s soothing energy flow into my body as she brushed the hair out of my face.
“I called in some favors. Sadie will have the help she needs,” Kian stated with utter certainty. The beeping skipped a beat as the love I felt for him surged. “Did you hear that?”
“I think she may have heard you,” Mrs. LaMotte’s voice was laced with doubt.
The tips of my fingers and toes began to prickle as the feeling returned.
“Her finger moved!” Kian’s excited voice boomed and I felt his energy by my side. His large warm hands wrapped mine. “Wake up, Sadie.”
My entire body tingled as if every cell were awaking at the same time. I felt the muscles in my neck and face loosen and I gently opened my eyes. Light blurred my vision for a moment before they focused on a pair of concerned mauve eyes.
“Kian.” My voice was barely above a whisper and sounded like I had a mouthful of cotton. I felt my forehead wrinkle as I kept my eyes locked on his. “Are you real?”
“Yes, babe.” His hand cupped my cheek. I closed my eyes and leaned into his touch, taking comfort from him, breathing in his bergamot and mint cologne.
When I opened my eyes and they focused behind Kian, a weight fell on my chest and I couldn’t breathe. My heartbeat became erratic and my hand that was still in Kian’s clenched. Both legs began to kick and I released a guttural moan.
“What’s the matter?” Kian’s voice was layered with worry and fear.
My feet found purchase on the mattress and I pushed myself into a seated position. My eyes frantically searched the room and beyond the three pairs of eyes watching me with concern, all surfaces were white. Everywhere was white.
I launched toward Kian and he scrambled to catch me. The tubes in my stomach and arm pulled painfully, but I didn’t care. When Kian folded me against his body, I crushed my face into his neck, hiding myself away from the white room. Tears poured from my eyes between shuddering breaths.
“Shh. It’s okay, babe, you’re safe now.” Kian held me as if I would break and for the first time in my life it felt like I just might.
“White room,” I choked out between hiccups.
“Nurse Bennett, get these tubes out of her. The white walls are freaking her out,” Kian demanded.
“I can’t without Dr. Stone’s approval.” I released a whimper. “He’s on his way. When she started to lose control, I paged him.”
“Please,” I whispered, my face still buried in Kian’s neck.
“We’ll get you out of here soon,” Kian cooed.
There was a soft knock at the door as Dr. Stone walked in. I peeked out of the corner of my eye toward the sound of his footsteps. He paused for a moment and took in the scene before him. I wondered if what he saw was what he expected when Nurse Bennett paged him.
“What happened?”
Nurse Bennett and Kian both began to speak, but with a stern look from the matronly nurse, Kian clenched his jaw shut. He was on the verge of losing his cool.
“Her heart monitor went off at 0320 hours. I arrived to check on her and all other vital signs looked okay. She started to wiggle her fingers and then woke up. She was fine for a few moments, but then began to panic and then jumped into Kian’s arms. Since then, she has only said ‘white room’. Kian has requested we remove her from this environment.”
Dr. Stone nodded and walked toward me. He bent over at the waist so that his face took up my vision. “Sadie, would you like a more colorful room?”
I nodded.
“We can do that, but you will have to cooperate with me and allow a physical. If you pass, we can remove your feeding tube and IV.”
“Okay,” I whispered.
“Unplug the pumps and follow me.” His eyes darted between Nurse Bennett and Kian. After a few moments, we followed the doctor at a slow pace so as to not tangle any of the wires dangling from my body. When we emerged from the room, all movement stopped and everyone stared at our procession. I felt their eyes on me and my body erupted in goosebumps as I pressed my face back into K
ian’s shoulder.
We hadn’t traveled far before I heard another door open and shut.
“Set her down on the bed,” Dr. Stone directed.
I opened my eyes and sagged in relief as I took in the navy walls. On the wall across from the bed was a large painting of a mountain range during sunrise, giving the room a peaceful atmosphere and putting me at ease. Kian set me down on the bed and the loud crinkling of paper filled the silence.
Dr. Stone approached me with caution. “Sadie, do you know where you are?”
“The Underground?”
“Yes. Do you recognize everyone in this room?”
I scanned the room and met the eyes of everyone. Mrs. LaMotte must have followed behind us because she stood unnoticed until now next to the door. She looked as if she hadn’t slept in weeks.
“Sadie,” the doctor caught my attention.
“Yes. I recognize everyone.”
“Good. Good. How do you feel?”
“The tube in my stomach itches, but I feel okay.”
“Are you aware of what happened to you?” My body stiffened and I sucked in a breath, held it for a moment and then released it through pursed lips. It did nothing to relax my rigid muscles.
“Yes.”
“What happened after you woke up today?”
I turned to meet the doctor’s eyes. “I tried to move, but couldn’t and I was scared. I heard an alarm and then they arrived.” I pointed to the others in the room. “I heard them talking about me. Was I really gone a month?”
“You were.”
“It felt longer.” The doctor nodded in response, his sympathetic eyes focused on me. “How long have I been asleep?”
“We kept you in a medically induced coma for a week while you were healed and fed nutrients. You were severely dehydrated and malnourished. I gave the order to remove the coma inducing drugs approximately 18 hours ago.” He paused for a moment. “Can you tell me what caused your episode in the other room?”
“The white walls. It felt like I was still there,” I whispered and averted my eyes as my cheeks flushed with shame.
“Sadie. Look at me.” I met his eyes. The sympathy was gone and a fierceness replaced it. “There is nothing to be ashamed about. You’ve gone through hell and it will take a while, but you will be okay.”
I nodded, not really believing him, but still had to fight back the tears threatening. A communicator chirped. Kian pulled his out of his pocket and scanned the screen. Watching him, the night I was kidnapped flashed to mind.
“You were dying!”
“Yes, but you saved me with your quick thinking. The others arrived just in time for me.” Kian’s voice grew soft. “I’m sorry.”
“What for?”
“For taking you out there and for not being able to save you.”
“Kian, we have told you over and over, there was no suspicion that Sadie was in danger from the HPC or that they even knew she existed. You couldn’t have known she had been followed back to the Underground and they were staking out the place waiting for her to emerge.” Mrs. LaMotte’s teacher voice was back and her narrow gaze was aimed at Kian.
“They told me you were dead,” I said. “They told me all kinds of things they did with your corpse, but I didn’t allow myself to believe it.” Talking about that place was hard. My voice choked randomly and at times it felt like I had to force the words out.
“You don’t have to talk about it now,” Dr. Stone spoke up. “I need to give you a thorough check before we can remove everything, but I don’t perceive an issue. You will have to make an appointment with the psychiatrist. No arguing with me on that.” He gave me a pointed look over the rim of his glasses and I nodded in agreement.
“She has an appointment with a specialist this afternoon,” Kian stated as he shrugged. “I called in a few favors and got Dr. Sokoloff to agree to treat Sadie.”
The name did not ring any bells with me, but by the looks of the others in the room Kian had just announced that the United States President was arriving this afternoon.
Dr. Stone coughed before schooling his features back into his professional demeanor. He patted my shoulder. “You will be in good hands then.”
After a thorough examination in which he had all but Nurse Bennet leave, I discovered that although my natural coloring mostly returned to my hands and feet, the tips of my fingers and toes were still numb even after the healings. Dr. Stone patted my knee in a grandfatherly way and explained that they would probably never fully heal, but I was lucky that my extremities weren’t beyond saving. He removed the tube from my stomach and the IV. Nurse Bennett then brought in a wheelchair, instructed me to rest for 24 hours, and gave me a list of instructions and safe foods to eat for the next few days.
When Kian walked back into take me back to my room to rest before my appointment with Dr. Sokoloff, he looked unsure and had a hard time meeting my eyes.
“What?” I demanded, my voice still gruff.
“The walls from here to your room are mostly white.”
“Oh.” Shame flooded my heart, causing it to sink into my stomach. “I can close my eyes until you let me know. It’s okay.”
“Okay.” He met my eyes. “It really is; I just don’t want to do something to hurt you.”
“I know.” I reached out to him and grabbed his hand hanging limply at his side. “Let’s go. I want to rest before the others demand to see me.”
Kian cupped my cheek before he walked behind me, placing his large hands on the handles of the chair. “Let’s do this.”
The trip to my room was uneventful. All the stress melted away as I absorbed the comfortable surroundings. My dresser tucked into the corner. My storm grey walls. My thin bed with its hospital corners, calling out to me. It didn’t take long for the fatigue to overtake my mind and I fell into a deep sleep still holding Kian’s hand.
Chapter 30
Kian shook my shoulder before jerking his hand away, cursing under his breath. My Talent had flared to life as I jolted awake. My shirt was covered in sweat and sticking to my skin as if it were another layer. I placed a hand over my chest, willing my heart to slow down. It felt like it would explode out of my chest at any moment.
“Are you okay?” I asked Kian as he held his fist to his chest.
“Yeah. I was just waking you for your appointment when your Talent latched on to me for a bit. It stings like a mother.”
I shrugged before bending my knees and wrapping my arms around my legs. The skin around the mostly healed scar that only hours before had held my feeding tube pulled uncomfortably. “That’s what I hear.”
Kian sat next to me and without pause, wrapped his arms around my shoulders. “Hey. I understand that you’re still in defensive mode and it will take a while to have the control you once had. Everyone will have to be mindful until you are ready.”
“I don’t want my friends to be cautious around me. I don’t like feeling this way, like I’m broken.”
“You are not broken. A little bruised and probably changed in one way or another, but never broken. You are too stubborn to let anyone do that to you without your permission. Besides, no one who loves you will judge you. Trust them.”
“I love you, Kian.”
“I love you too.”
He kissed the top of my head and while my Talent thrashed against the bars of its internal prison, the walls held, but my secondary wouldn’t stay put. Since my time in the white room, it constantly pulsed in the back of my mind. Like a radar, every few seconds I had a mental picture of the location of each person, Caelian and Norm, within a certain range.
It was distracting.
“What are you thinking about?” Kian rubbed the wrinkled skin between my eyebrows with the pad of his thumb. The gentle massage felt nice and released some of the tension in my shoulders.
“When I was in the white room, my secondary expanded. I can now see norm energy signatures.”
“That can be helpful.”
“Yes,
but I no longer can turn off my secondary. It’s constantly pinging in my head and if I close my eyes there’s an energy signature map behind my lids.”
Kian’s eyebrows pinched together in thought as he rubbed the day old whiskers on his chin. “I could see how that would be annoying, but your Talent is new and we know nothing of its nature or its limitations. Each time a new Talent emerges, it can take months to years to completely understand its nature. If your secondary is meant to be on constantly, it will become a part of who you are and will not bother you. You will rely on it and it will serve its purpose to help you.”
He was right and I knew this from school, but my secondary changing wasn’t what was pressing on my mind.
“Kian?”
“Yeah.”
“Do you think my Talent is done evolving? Am I meant to be just a… a…” I swallowed, the word was at the tip of my tongue, but it was hard to voice the nickname Dean and the HPC had given to me. When I finally found the courage to say it, it came out barely a whisper. “A killer.”
Kian’s fingertips brushed my jaw and gently turned my face so he could look me in the eyes. “I never believed your Talent was only meant to kill. Neither does Mrs. LaMotte or your friends. We all believe that like your secondary, you will eventually discover the true nature of your Talent and when you do, it will be a beautiful thing.”
He leaned in and kissed the tip of my nose. “Do you want to know why I was so against your vendetta to kill Miles Koenig?” The anger that usually flared when my grandfather’s name was spoken was oppressed by my melancholy state and for the first time since Michael’s death, I didn’t feel like killing the bastard.
“No.”
“Because I don’t believe that you’re a killer. It just isn’t in your nature.” I flinched hearing the nickname come out of Kian’s mouth and he raised his eyebrow at my response, but didn’t ask for an explanation. “Yes, you are capable and willing to take action in defense of yourself and your friends, but I honestly believe that if you were to follow through with the assassination of your grandfather like you and McCredie both want, it would break a part of you forever.”
The Caelian Cycle Boxed Set Page 32
