by Harmon, AJ
“MEL Holdings. How may I direct your call?”
“Matt Lathem, please.”
“One moment.”
“MEL Holdings. How can I help you?” came another voice.
“Please connect me to Matt Lathem.”
“And what might this call be about?”
“It’s personal. It’s regarding his dating habits.”
“Oh, well, just a minute please.”
“Mr Lathem’s office. How can I help you?”
“Goddamnit! Can somebody please put Matt Lathem on the phone?”
“Excuse me ma’am. This is Mr. Lathem’s secretary. What is it that you want?” the voice was stern but professional.
“Look, I’m a friend of Janie Anderson’s and I need to speak to Matt. Please?”
“Oh, I see. Well Mr. Lathem actually wasn’t in the office today. I expect him in tomorrow. Can I give him a message?”
“No, I need a number where I can reach him.”
“I’m sorry but I cannot give out that information. But I would be happy to pass on the information.”
“Please ask him to call Katy. It’s very important!” Katy left her number with the secretary and hung up.
She would give him a piece of her mind if it’s the last thing she did.
14.
Janie spent the rest of Wednesday packing up her things. She must have checked the dresser and the closet a hundred times making sure she hadn’t left anything behind. Ordering room service, she mindlessly watched some television and picked at her salmon.
It’s good, she thought. But why would I order salmon when I live in Oregon and can have the best salmon anytime I want? She just didn’t have much of an appetite. She was ready to go home.
Janie changed into her pink baby-doll pj’s and crawled into bed about 8:30, and she set the alarm. She needed to be up really early and she didn’t want to keep Matt waiting. She needed to be calm and collected when she saw him and be able to keep all of her emotions in check.
She’d only been in bed for about ten minutes when she was startled by a knock on the door. Jumping up, she padded to the door and cracked it open. Janie’s mouth dropped as she stepped back and opened the door wider. Matt!
He half smiled and Janie couldn’t breathe. How could he be so dangerous? All strength just dissipated from her body and she leaned on the door.
“Hi,” he said.
*****
It had been one of the worst days of his life! Matt had walked out of the hotel feeling like he had just been sucker punched, hard. How had he let this happen?
He hadn’t gone back to work. For the first time in eighteen years he had called Angela and said he was sick and wasn’t coming in. He had gone home and had spent most of the day in the gym; running, weightlifting and beating the crap out of the punching bag. By three o’clock he was physically spent and had taken a long hot shower. Thoughts of Janie filled his mind and when he closed his eyes he could see her huddled on the floor sobbing. Looking back, that’s when he had let his guard down. She was like a wounded bird and he had wanted to comfort her and to somehow make it all better.
Matt wandered aimlessly through his apartment. He tried watching TV and turned it off after ten minutes. He tried reviewing the roll of blueprints on his desk and gave up after fifteen minutes. He sat at the piano and lifted the lid to stroke the ivory keys, but he didn’t know how to play so he walked outside and stood looking at the view. He pulled out his phone and found the one picture he had taken of Janie. She was grabbing her dress and laughing and her eyes were alive and she looked so happy and beautiful.
He couldn’t tell her how he felt. That was out of the question now that she had made her declaration of it being ‘unbearable’ to be anything more than just a fling.
That’s what I asked for, right? Matt was furious with himself. But he couldn’t let her leave without telling her how he felt. So if he couldn’t tell her with words then he would have to find another way.
*****
‘You’re early,” Janie looked at her feet and stepped back, opening the door for Matt to enter her room. She reached for the lamp switch and a soft glow lit the room.
He chuckled, “I guess I am.”
He moved into the room and Janie was suddenly aware she was wearing her pajamas. She closed the door and moved to the bed searching for her robe.
“I know you’re leave in the morning and I know you aren’t interested in this being anything more than a fling, but I thought… I wondered if I could spend your last night in New York with you.”
I do want more! I want so much more! You’re the one who doesn’t want more! You’re the one who can’t commit to anyone! Janie tried to remain calm on the outside while she was screaming on the inside. She looked up at him and searched his face for a clue; a clue to anything. She only saw deep blue eyes with no hint of anything.
“I’d like that,” she whispered.
Matt removed the lightweight windbreaker he was wearing and hung it on the desk chair. He took the couple of steps toward her and took her face tenderly in his hands, his fingers in her hair. Slowly his head lowered, his lips grazing hers. Gently at first he kissed her, but the passion built quickly and they locked in a heated embrace. Janie’s hands glided up and down his back, pulling him closer, lost in the fiery moment.
Matt’s hands traveled down her neck and down her back and lifted the top of her pajamas and ran his hands over her flushed skin underneath. Janie pulled on his polo shirt tucked in to his jeans and followed his lead, finding smooth skin under the fabric. His body was rock hard but his skin soft and warm. Her hands explored his back, committing each inch to memory.
Tongues danced and their bodies pulsed with desire for each other. Matt’s fingers ran up her sides and stopped on the full fleshy mounds of her breasts and Janie gasped at his touch. He pulled back from the kiss and looked into her eyes, his full of desire.
“God, you’re beautiful,” he whispered.
Janie lowered her lashes and grabbed the edges of his shirt, lifting them up, forcing his arms up to remove it over his head. He threw it on the floor and Janie caressed his chest. She ran the back of her fingers up the trail of hair that began at the waistband of his jeans and over his taut stomach. She circled his sternum with her fingernails.
Once more, she thought. Let me love him once more and then I will let him go like he asked.
Matt lifter her pajama top over her head and scooped her into his arms, cradling her against his chest. He took three quick strides and gently laid her down on the bed. He kicked of his tennis shoes and slowly climbed over her, tenderly kissing her again. He lowered his body onto hers, her legs parting to let him lay on her, accepting his weight.
He kissed her and their bodies melded together. Leaning on his elbows, Matt played with her hair as he deepened the kiss, shooting his tongue into her mouth, tasting every inch of her.
Janie could feel his erection as the metal zipper of his jeans pushed into her thigh. It was arousing to her to know he was turned on and her body begged for his hands. She arched her back into him and he responded by trailing kisses down her neck and taking each sweet nipple into his mouth and gently sucking, softly biting, obeying her silent request. She ran her fingers through his hair, grabbing the silky strands and holding him to her breasts. She inhaled his scent, knowing this would be the last time she would smell his unique and glorious smell.
Matt continued his trail of kisses over her belly and down to her pajama shorts. He moved the fabric down her body and Janie lifted her hips as he pulled them down her thighs. He rolled back onto his knees and pulled the garment form her legs.
Janie had never thought of herself as sensual. But as she lay on the bed, completely naked, entirely exposed, with Matt kneeling between her legs in just a pair of jeans, looking very aroused, the revelation came to her that she was in fact a very sexual creature. Matt had awakened in her the desire to not only receive intense pleasure but to give pleasure in ret
urn.
With a new-found sense of confidence, Janie sat up and placed her hands on Matt’s chest. “Lie down,” she purred.
Matt’s eyes opened and a wide grin emerged across his lovely face and she pressed him down to the mattress, fully stretched out on the bed. Janie boldly straddled him and clasped his hands in hers, lowering to kiss him, pouring as much love as she could into that single moment. As her lips touched his, her breasts grazed his chest and she felt the jolt through his body. Following his lead, she trailed small delicate kisses down his chin and across to his ear, nipping on the lobe and breathing ever so softly and he shivered and squeezed her hands. Then she kissed down his neck and across his shoulder and down his chest, stopping at his nipple and she imitated him by gently biting and sucking and pulling and his breath gasped and she felt very satisfied.
Scooting down his legs, Janie continued kissing him down to his belly button and swirled her tongue around and around and then down the trail of hair that disappeared into his jeans. She rolled up and saw him watching her intently, eyes hooded, lips apart, shallow breathing. Eyes locked with his she released his hands and fumbled with the button on his jeans and carefully pulled on the zipper till his bulging erection was only confined by his black boxer briefs. She wriggled off his legs so that she sat in between them and pulled the denim from his body, one leg and then the other. She felt in the pockets, looking for the condom she knew would be there, and then discarded them in the pile on the floor, adding his athletic socks to it.
She kissed the top of each foot and each ankle and then worked her way up his shin. She kissed his knee and kissed his thigh all the way up to the bottom of his briefs. Then she kissed the other knee and his other thigh, stopping again when she came to his black underwear. Ever so delicately, Janie slipped her fingers into the waistband of his briefs and gradually pulled them down, down to his knees. She lifted his right leg and pulled his foot through and then his left leg, depositing them on the floor. She reached for the condom she had removed from his jeans and tore it open with her teeth, discarding the wrapper. She knelt over Matt’s hips and rolled the condom down his taut length and gazed up at him, desire pumping through her veins. Matt grabbed her shoulders and pulled her down to him, kissing her passionately.
Straddling him she tilted back and found the head of his penis between her legs and slowly, wantonly, slid down onto him, their gaze never breaking. Janie sat upright, fully impaled on him, feeling every inch of him inside her. All of her senses gloried in the feel of him buried deep within her. Matt’s hands grabbed her hips and held her firmly to him as he bucked his hips and groaned with pleasure. Janie splayed her hands across his chest and rose up and then slid back down, creating the rhythm of their union. Over and over she went, desire building more and more. She could feel the tension building and she knew she was right at the brink when Matt thrust upwards, gasping, and Janie pushed into his hips and they fell splendidly over the edge in unison into an orgasm that racked their bodies, leaving them breathless and entwined in each other’s limbs.
*****
The alarm buzzed at exactly 4am and Janie slapped at the snooze button. The realization that it was all over, all done, that she was leaving weighed heavily. She was going to have to say goodbye. Matt rolled over and grabbed her around the waist.
“Not yet,” he breathed.
She turned and tried to see him in the dark, tried to study his features, every last detail committed to memory. If she stayed any longer her tears would fall and she couldn’t let him see her cry. She lifted his arm and escaped to the bathroom. Leaning on the door she fought the tears back, willing herself to focus on getting dressed, packing the last of her toiletries.
A few minutes later, Janie emerged dressed and her small bag closed and ready. Matt was dressed sitting on the edge of the bed. She couldn’t read his expression; it was closed, veiled, hidden. He stood and took his turn in the bathroom. Janie looked around the room, double and triple checking that she hadn’t forgotten anything. She checked departing schedules on her phone and confirmed the flight was on time.
Matt joined her and grabbed his jacket off the chair. He took her bags and they left the room. They traveled down to the lobby and out the front door without saying a word. Ray was waiting for them and opened the trunk and Matt put the suitcases in the car. Ray opened the door for Janie and she slid into the backseat. Looking out in the dark, she watched as they pulled out from the curb and headed for La Guardia.
Matt reached for her hand and she risked a look at him. He was looking out his window. She squeezed his hand and they rode in silence.
*****
Matt wheeled her suitcases into the terminal despite Janie’s insistence she could manage herself. They walked straight to the ticket counter and Janie handed the agent her driver’s license. He took her bags and gave her two boarding passes; one for the New York to Denver leg and then on to Portland.
“They have a nice lounge in Denver,” Matt mused.
Janie smiled and took the passes. “Good! I’ll be there for three and a half hours,” she said.
They walked hand in hand to the beginning of the security checkpoint. Janie could feel her eyes filling, her throat tightening. She turned and placed her hand gently on his cheek and looked into his eyes, finding the strength to whisper, “Thank you Matt, I mean it. You have been…….it has been the trip of a lifetime. No regrets.”
She kissed him, barely touching her lips to his and turned. She walked quickly to the TSA agent sitting on a stool, tears streaming down her cheeks, unable to look back. “Goodbye Matt. I love you.”
*****
He didn’t trust himself to say a word. The ride to the airport had been excruciating. He had wanted to scream that he didn’t want her to leave; that they could make a life together. But she had made it obvious there was no future for them and he hadn’t wanted to beg. He didn’t want to make her uncomfortable. He would abide by her wishes. He would abide by his rules.
He had made a promise to her to carry her bags in and that was what he intended to do. He had fulfilled everything he had told her would; they would spend time together, he would show her his New York and then she could dump him and walk away. Only, he had been wrong about there being no regrets. Very wrong! He would never have imagined two weeks ago that his life could be turned upside down so quickly and by someone such as Janie Anderson.
And she had walked away. He had willed her to look back at him, it would have been a sign and he would have yelled her name and she would run back to him, but she hadn’t. She walked away.
Matt stood there like a statue for several minutes after she disappeared from sight. Finally, he walked out to the car. Ray was leaning on the hood and stood as he exited the terminal. “She’s gone,” he said a deep frown on his face.
“Yes. She is.”
“Home, Sir?”
“No. The office.”
Ray drove back in to Manhattan as Matt watched the sun rise, a single tear falling down his cheek.
*****
Janie boarded the plane first. She sat down in her comfortable wide leather window seat and shoved her purse under leg. Locating the seatbelt under the pillow and blanket, the metal ends clinked as she clasped them together and she pulled the belt tight and leaned back closing her eyes and taking a deep breath. She could hear the other passengers around her, finding their seats and stowing luggage in the overhead bins. The pleasant voice of the flight attendant that welcomed her aboard filled the small cabin, offering help and drinks.
It was exactly the same as two weeks ago when she had boarded the plane in Portland. Only this time, a pleasant elderly woman came and sat next to her. Janie looked out the window and just wished she was home.
*****
There was a pile of documents on his desk when he entered his office. He sat in the chair and swung around to look outside. He rubbed his forehead and took a deep breath. She was gone and no matter how hard it was he needed to put her behind him.
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Matt swung back to his desk and flipped through the messages Angela had left for him. There was one from his attorney about the new partnership with Mark. A couple from Chicago and one from Katy.
Do I know a Katy? he thought. He scanned the number and it had a 503 area code. Angela had written Janie’s name in the memo line. What?
After a few seconds he put the pieces together. Katy is Janie’s friend in Oregon. Why would she be calling me? The message was dated yesterday afternoon. Matt thought about the day before. It had not been a good day.
He picked up the phone on his desk and dialed the number. It rang three or four times.
“This had better be fucking important,” the woman’s voice said.
“Katy?”
“Yeah. Who is this? It’s four o’clock in the morning!”
“Katy, this is Matt Lathem. You left a message for me yesterday. I am returning your call. I apologize. I didn’t think about the time difference.”
“Are you shitting me? You wait till she’s on the fucking plane before you call? You really are an asshole, aren’t you?”
“What? Is there something you wanted, or did you just call to swear at me?”
“Oh no, there was a couple of things I wanted to say to you. She’s on her way back right?”
“Yes, I dropped her off at the airport an hour ago.”
“First off, I just want you to know that your little game of ‘let’s have a great time while you’re here and then we just walk away with no regrets’ might be fine for the type of women you date, but I am sure that Janie is NOT the type you usually hook up with and that was just cruel to do to her. This is the first time that she put herself out there and she gets screwed by you. You’re a real gentleman aren’t you? And secondly, I get that you made no promises to her but you might have been just a touch discrete about fucking your ex-wife at the same you are fucking my friend. You’re just an asshole. And that’s all I wanted to say.”
“Whoa! Hold up! What are you talking about? I am not fucking my ex-wife, not that it’s any of your business. And you are right. Janie is nothing like the women I usually date,” Matt said. “She’s nothing like them, that’s what changed this whole thing,” he whispered.
