Enter Helen

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Enter Helen Page 1

by Brooke Hauser




  DEDICATION

  To my parents, Terry and Michelle Hauser, the best of partners;

  and to my husband, Addison MacDonald,

  whom I lean on and look forward to seeing every day.

  EPIGRAPH

  Funny business, a woman’s career—the things you drop on your way up the ladder so you can move faster. You forget you’ll need them again when you get back to being a woman. That’s one career all females have in common, whether we like it or not: being a woman. . . . And in the last analysis, nothing’s any good unless you can look up just before dinner or turn around in bed, and there he is. Without that, you’re not a woman. You’re something with a French provincial office or a book full of clippings, but you’re not a woman.

  —Margo Channing (Bette Davis), in All About Eve, 1950

  She is such a feeling person that her work is almost surely colored by her own sensitivities. But her work is her kingdom, alas, only eight hours per day. As mentioned above, she is a feeling being. She is completely aware of her own longings—to be needed, to be reassured that she is attractive and desirable, to belong intimately somewhere to someone. She is all Woman.

  —from a 1957 job evaluation of Miss Helen Marie Gurley, a copywriter at Foote, Cone & Belding

  CONTENTS

  Dedication

  Epigraph

  Prologue

  1 Real Estate

  2 Ground Rules

  3 Sex and the Not-So-Single Girl

  4 The Story Editor

  5 A Fun Scam

  6 Single Women of the World, Unite!

  7 The Decline of Western Civilization

  8 Something’s Got to Give

  9 The Woiking Girl’s Friend

  10 New York, New York

  11 The Meaning of Lunch

  12 A Strange Stirring

  13 Women Alone

  14 Peace Through Understanding

  15 In the Mail

  16 Femme

  17 For the Girl with a Job

  18 The Most Exciting Woman in the World

  19 The July Issue

  20 Techniques

  21 Pippy-Poo Copy

  22 Daddy’s Little Girl

  23 Going West

  24 Good Time Gurley

  25 Turning Points

  26 Self-Portrait

  27 Parlour Games

  28 James Bond on a Budget

  29 Mr. Right Is Dead

  30 That Cosmopolitan Girl

  31 The Iron Butterfly

  32 Resolutions

  33 The 92 Percent

  34 Nobody over Thirty

  35 The World’s Most Beautiful Byline

  36 Fake Pictures

  37 The Actress

  38 A Groovy Day on the Boardwalk

  39 Before and After

  40 A Viper in the Nest

  41 Women in Revolt

  42 The Strike

  43 Pitiful People

  44 Some Notes on a New Magazine . . .

  45 Enter Helen

  46 The Blue Goddess

  47 Cosmopolitan Nude Man

  48 Problems

  49 Two Faces of the Same Eve

  50 ERA and You

  51 Having It All

  Epilogue

  Acknowledgments

  Notes

  Index

  About the Author

  Also by Brooke Hauser

  Credits

  Copyright

  About the Publisher

  PROLOGUE

  “Oh well he’s got that je ne sais quoi While I, my dear, am from Arkansas”

  —from an early poem by Helen Gurley

  In the early Seventies, Helen Gurley Brown began working on a musical about her life, tracing her rise from a mousy girl from Little Rock, Arkansas, to the legendary editor of Cosmopolitan magazine. It was a story she had told countless times before, but this time her writing partner, a Cosmo contributor named Lyn Tornabene, was helping her to turn it into a spectacle worthy of Broadway.

  They envisioned a play about “a lady who knew—all out of the context of her time—the power of sex.” Set in Depression-era Arkansas, Los Angeles, and New York, it would unfold in several acts, with razzle-dazzle musical numbers like “Going All the Way” (one of the worst sins a girl could commit); “Sex Is Power” (followed by a series of “passion” ballets, featuring beds onstage and male dancers as Helen’s favorite ex-lovers); and “Helen,” an ode to the patron saint of single girls, the editor of Metropolitan magazine (subbing for Cosmopolitan), and the ultimate authority on such subjects as how to boff in a wig or bag a rich man. Over the course of the play, many different characters would walk on and off the stage, though the most important stage direction of all was the simplest: “Enter, Helen.”

  But which one? There was the young Helen: scrawny, flat-chested, and acne-ridden with crooked teeth and limp, brown hair, a timid and pitiful creature. And then there was the grown Helen: a sophisticated, stylish, and sexy woman who had transformed herself from a “mouseberger” into the most famous editor in the world, a woman who, in one scene, tells her fawning secretary, “Anybody can be me. You just have to work at it.”

  In a flash of inspiration, the playwrights decided to create a duet for both Helens. Picture the scene: The grown Helen begins singing to herself as she primps in the mirror, putting on false eyelashes and a hair fall. Meanwhile, a soft light illuminates another spot on the stage. Pale and frail-looking in her cap and gown on graduation day, young Helen appears, lamenting her “blah” looks and wondering aloud, in her small, shaky voice, what will become of her future self. They called this song “Look at Me,” aka “The Mouseberger Blues.”

  Over the years, Lyn spent countless hours interviewing Helen, digging out the backstory that would become the basis of the play. Once, at Helen’s Park Avenue apartment, “she made supper,” Lyn says, “a salad with lemon juice and mineral oil—it’s also a laxative! She had a little jar of Bacos, and then she made one scrambled egg that we shared. And Diet Jell-O.”

  Other times, Lyn went into the city to pick Helen up and take her back to her house in Greenwich, Connecticut. After Helen did her morning floor exercises in Lyn’s guest room upstairs—thump, thump, thump—they got to work. They talked about single girls and sex and men and affairs and consequences. Helen remembered girls she’d known who had come to her after getting pregnant; girls she had listened to and counseled through abortions and rejections, after the men went back to their wives. But mostly, she remembered the girl she had been.

  During those sessions, they talked about Helen’s childhood in Arkansas. Helen told Lyn about the tragic death of her father, Ira, and the fog of depression her mother, Cleo, never quite escaped, even after remarrying. (She later took the last name Bryan.) Other characters they chose not to develop, like Helen’s older sister, Mary, who lived in Oklahoma. A victim of polio who spent most of her life in a wheelchair, Mary was quietly determined in her own way, but Helen and Lyn decided she would be better as a foil—a muted, gentle soul to bring out the sparkle of Helen’s personality.

  They titled the musical Helen and eventually shared the beginnings of a script with an agent, who shopped it around. But it never sold. “It was too soon. The producing world is a man’s world on Broadway. They weren’t ready to worship Helen,” Lyn says. “It’s so sad. She wanted it very badly.”

  Helen filed the idea away, but she never forgot about it. Nearly two decades after they started writing Helen, she brought it up with Lyn once again. “Nothing’s doing with the musical,” she said, “but I’m still trying.”

  Enter Helen.

  ( 1 )

  REAL ESTATE

  1958

  “All my life, ever since I was a little girl,

  I’ve always had the
same dream. To marry a zillionaire.”

  —Loco Dempsey (Betty Grable) in How to Marry a Millionaire, 1953

  Helen Gurley loved the idea of David Brown long before she loved him. What wasn’t to love? As head of the story department at 20th Century Fox, he was one of the most eligible bachelors in Hollywood, and according to a mutual friend, Ruth Schandorf, charming, intellectual, and “gentle as a baby lamb.” He had been something of a whiz kid after graduating from Stanford and the Columbia School of Journalism—editor-in-chief of Liberty magazine and then managing editor at Cosmopolitan. Twice divorced, he had a son with his first wife, a teenage boy who was almost old enough to go to college. Perhaps most intriguingly of all, David lived in an elegant house in the Pacific Palisades section of Los Angeles, and he made an annual income of $75,000. Not including expense accounts.

  When Helen first heard that David was single again, she felt her hopes flit around in her rib cage. At forty-two, he was what she had begun to think of as “collector’s-item age,” more worldly than her bachelor friends in their meager twenties, with less mileage than widowers in their thick-in-the-middle sixties. David Brown was clearly marriage material, but the first time Helen asked Ruth to fix them up, she advised against it. “It’s too soon,” Ruth said. “You should wait until he’s ready for a sensible girl like you.” David’s second wife, Wayne Clark, had left him for another man, and in the aftermath he had been finding some comfort in the arms of starlets.

  No one who knew Helen Gurley well would have described her as patient, but she was sensible and self-aware. She hadn’t stayed single for thirty-six years without getting to know herself, and she’d never forgotten the lesson she had learned as a starry-eyed twenty-four-year-old legal secretary working for Paul Ziffren, back when he was still a young tax attorney at the Los Angeles law firm Loeb & Loeb. Helen was a lousy legal secretary, partly because she found the work so boring, but working for Mr. Ziffren had its perks. Namely, it kept her in meat and men. Meat, as Mr. Ziffren once gave her ten pounds of bacon as a gift (a client, Vons market, had given it to him) at the peak of rationing in the Forties, and she and her mother and sister had eaten it for eight days straight. And men, as the firm represented several wealthy entrepreneurs looking to buy or sell exclusive properties, and her job put her in close contact with all kinds of Possibles. When she wasn’t typing up depositions, Helen fantasized about what it would be like to be the wife of Texan investor Joe Drown, who had just purchased the Hotel Bel-Air. Marrying into money wouldn’t solve all of her problems—Mary would still be in a wheelchair, and Mother would still be depressed—but at least they wouldn’t be poor.

  One day, after Howard Hawks’s wife, Slim, swanned into the office in Russian sable looking every inch the Best-Dressed Woman in the World, Helen approached her boss. Wouldn’t it be something if she could marry rich and solve her family’s problems? Maybe Mr. Ziffren could send one of the firm’s wealthy clients her way.

  Mr. Ziffren studied her, a scrawny, needy little thing with a slight Arkie twang. “Helen, the kind of man you are thinking of, seriously rich, can marry anybody he wants to—a movie star, famous fashion model, heiress, somebody from a great family, her father a financial or political star,” he explained. “He isn’t necessarily going to want to marry you, whatever your inclinations!”

  It was a cold but well-reasoned argument, and after Mr. Ziffren’s little lecture, Helen put millionaires out of her sight—at least as potential husbands.

  Instead, she took up with a wealthy builder—she later discreetly referred to him as “M.”—who hired her to work at a movie studio that he had built in the heart of Hollywood. During her job interview, Helen gave an abbreviated version of her qualifications and her life story. After her father died in an elevator accident back in Arkansas, Mary had gotten polio and Mother had done everything she could to support them, but it wasn’t enough. Even after moving back to Arkansas, they depended on her for money, Helen explained to this balding man with a limp who listened quietly before asking if she had a boyfriend.

  He interviewed her on a Monday, and by the end of the week, they’d had sex on his office couch, all expensive buttery leather. In addition to a brand-new office, he set her up in a furnished apartment and began teaching her how to be a mistress. For starters, he said, she must buy some lingerie for herself and have cigars and alcohol on hand at all times. He soon sent over a fully stocked bar: more than three dozen bottles of liquor and liqueurs, from Chartreuse to crème de menthe.

  It was a simple arrangement, and one in which they both had something to offer. He provided her with cash, a new wardrobe and wristwatch, a used car, and a stock portfolio; and she provided sex as well as constant entertainment with her funny-sad stories about Mother and Mary and all of their hillbilly relatives. She was Scheherazade of the Ozarks: charming, witty, somewhat well-read, and good in bed.

  As long as she was with M., she didn’t have to worry about money. He paid for Helen’s first-ever airplane trip and sent her, alone, to explore places like Palm Springs and Catalina Island; but she soon grew lonely and unhappy. She had no office friends, no life outside of the affair. For a while she shared an apartment with a Jewish girl, her roommate Barbara, but M. was an anti-Semite and didn’t want her associating with Jews. One day Helen was so bored in her little apartment that she polished off three bags of potato chips and a giant batch of clam dip all by herself before going downtown to watch three movies, one after another. She ultimately discovered that she wasn’t very good at being a kept girl—eventually she started sleeping when she was with him instead of sleeping with him—but she milked M. for all she could.

  It was M. who gave Helen the money to visit Cleo and Mary, and who found them an apartment in Los Angeles when they briefly moved back to California. Whatever the request—the plane fare to see her mother or some cash for new clothes—all Helen had to do was ask, providing a little something in return. “I was like a prostitute,” she later told her friend Lyn. “I would sleep with him and get the $200.” Despite her own waning interest in M., she was devastated when the affair ended; her security was gone.

  Since then, Helen had gotten to know her share of the opposite sex. She continued to see men from the office, married men, and, occasionally, famous men like prizefighter Jack Dempsey. She discovered that what she lacked in natural beauty she could make up for in perseverance and a little skill she would later call “sinking in.” No man ever tripped over himself when he saw Helen Gurley walking down the street, but over time, she found that if she could just get close enough to her target and turn on her own quiet charm, she could make an impression.

  By her mid-thirties, Helen had had her heart broken several times, and with the help of her girlfriends and a few psychiatrists, she had glued it back together like a torn Valentine. Now David was the one who was recovering, and he would have to get starlets out of his system once and for all.

  So, taking their mutual friend’s recommendation, Helen waited. And then, one day nearly two years after his divorce from Wife No. 2 was finalized, David Brown liked the sound of Helen Gurley, too. According to Ruth’s thumbnail sketch, she was a successful (but not aggressive) career girl who had:

  •No debts

  •No ex-husbands

  •No kids

  •No family nearby

  At thirty-six, she had no history to hold her back, and everything she needed to be self-sufficient. Newly hired as a copywriter and account executive at the Hollywood ad agency Kenyon & Eckhardt, she lived in a cute little flat and was the owner of a Mercedes-Benz 190 SL and a small but sturdy portfolio of stocks.

  One night in June 1958, Ruth hosted a small dinner party at her house for David and Helen. Slim and neat in a short blue shift, Helen felt chic but nervous. As they ate, she let David do most of the talking—after all, he was so good at talking, and she was rather shy. But when he walked her out to her little gray Benz, she mentioned that she had bought it the week before, paying $5,000 in cash. He
was seriously impressed. Most of the women he knew wouldn’t pay for a taxi, let alone their own Mercedes.

  They began seeing each other somewhat regularly after that. Driving his beat-up Jaguar, David would pick Helen up at her little flat on Bonnie Brae Street downtown, a bit of a haul from his place in Pacific Palisades. Even though he wasn’t wealthy himself (as it turned out, he didn’t own the house overlooking the Pacific but rather rented it for three hundred dollars a month), David whisked Helen into a world of film premieres, dinner galas, and glamorous pool parties.

  As accomplished as he was professionally, David had a painful past of his own. Born into a well-off family, he, too, had been abandoned by his father, Edward—but unlike Ira Gurley, who had died tragically, David’s father had left by choice. An executive for the milk industry, he was a philanderer who abandoned his wife, Lillian, and their infant son in Brooklyn to marry his mistress. Raised by his mother and stepfather in Woodmere, Long Island, David met his father for the first time in seventeen years when an uncle arranged a visit. Edward later paid his way through Stanford and occasionally wined and dined him in Manhattan, along with whichever women joined them that night. But Edward’s second family didn’t know about David’s existence until 1951, when he and his then-wife, Wayne, decided to make a spontaneous visit to his father’s summer home in Southampton. In the moments before they arrived, Edward quickly brought his wife and grown children up to speed, divulging that he had a son in his thirties from a previous marriage, as well as a daughter-in-law and a grandson. “We were a secret. My father never listed me as his son in his Who’s Who in America sketch until I was listed in Who’s Who in America and included him in mine,” David later recalled in his 1990 memoir, Let Me Entertain You. “He was the worst kind of snob.”

  David shared bits and pieces of his history with Helen early on, and sometimes, back at her typewriter, she wrote about his issues, which were starting to seem mixed up with her own. “He’s only 42 but he feels he hasn’t made an important contribution to the world,” she mused after one of their dates in some notes to herself. (This particular document was a nearly six-page character study.) David was a bit of a dreamer, and not just when it came to the movies. Often when they were together, he would start telling Helen about his Ideal Girl, and that girl did not resemble her at all. “I feel more like a something with other people—smarter, cleverer, funnier and prettier,” Helen wrote, “but feeling like that with other people just about equals feeling like nothing with David because he is so much smarter than they are.”

 

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