by Jodi Thomas
Joe moved so fast he almost left Connor behind. “Where do I look?”
“Take the creek road.” Connor followed him outside. “It’s not the shortest, but she always liked the wildflowers there. I’ll go down past the grain elevators and the tracks.”
Jillian followed the men out without mentioning that it was winter. If Gram thought she could walk, she probably hadn’t noticed the weather, but she might be disappointed that there were no wildflowers.
They got back in the pickup. Connor took a long breath. “I feel better with Joe looking, too. We’ll cover the area in half the time.” He swung the truck around and the search continued.
“How long have you known Joe?” She kept her eyes on the side of the road as she asked.
“All my life. He and my grandfather were best friends. The three of them grew up together, but he’s the only one who calls Gram Jeanie.”
“She’s still a girl to him.”
Connor nodded. “I guess so. Sometimes, when they’re just talking to each other, I get the feeling they’re two young people dressed up in old folks’ bodies. The way they talk, how they laugh at jokes no one else gets. Maybe once in a while time stops between friends.”
Jillian fought back tears. She’d never known that kind of friendship.
Silence hung in the air as he drove. They reached Autumn Acres, but had no luck. For a moment, she thought Connor might insist on searching the place himself. Each minute Gram was gone deepened the worry lines across his forehead.
Jillian used her cell to call Stella. No word, but Stella had organized a search in town. The Sanderson sisters were combing Walmart. Toad sent both her sons to walk Main. Gram might have stopped in somewhere. Paulina called the sheriff’s office and suggested they block the state highway just in case Gram was kidnapped.
“We’ll find her,” Stella’s squeaky little voice pledged, “even if we have to comb every street and alley in this town.”
Jillian thought maybe Stella had watched one too many crime shows. Every street wouldn’t take twenty minutes on a bike.
As they began another loop through the back streets of the district, Connor’s phone rang.
“Yes,” he said as he clicked on the speaker.
“I’ve got her!” Joe shouted. “She took a fall on the uneven ground by the creek. We’re on our way to the hospital. Meet you there.”
“Is she...”
Gram’s voice came through the cell. “I’m fine, Connor. Don’t worry about me. Skinned both knees and Joe’s worried I may have broken my leg. He’s just fussing over me.”
“I am not. We’re going to the hospital, Jeanie, and that’s final.”
Jillian could hear the old folks arguing, and then Gram said, “Connor, you make Joe get his blood pressure checked at the hospital. He’s overreacting.”
“We’ll get your leg x-rayed first. If you can’t put any weight on it, you got a problem.” Joe sounded worried.
Gram didn’t argue. There was silence for a moment, then Joe said low into the phone. “She’s crying, son. She’s hurting and just too stubborn to admit it. But I’ll get her there and they’ll take care of her. I promise.”
Gram’s voice was barely audible in the background. “I’m just fine. I’ve seen more blood cutting up a chicken than I’ve got on me. Don’t you worry, Danny.”
Connor smiled at Jillian but yelled into the phone. “We’ll meet you at the hospital, Gram. Thanks, Joe. You found her and if she’s arguing, her injuries are probably not that bad.”
The call ended.
While he drove, Jillian called Stella and filled her in.
“We’ll get the word out,” Stella announced. “All the quilters are here with their cell phones. Except Dixie. She forgot hers.”
“I’ll report back as soon as we’re at the hospital.”
“Send pictures of any injuries. Those emergency rooms are chaos, and they might miss something. We’ll check the photos and probably notice something they missed. After all, we’ve had our share of broken bones.”
When Connor pulled into the ten-car parking lot of the local hospital, Jillian almost laughed out loud. This wasn’t exactly a chaos emergency room.
Connor explained as they walked in. “Most of the rooms were for long-term residents needing more help than the Acres offered. Two rooms at the front were reserved as delivery rooms or emergency rooms.” He took her hand. A solid grip as if he needed her beside him. “This care facility is packed. That’s why we’re building on another unit at the Acres. It’ll have all levels of care in a few months. Since we doubled our doctor’s clinic and built Autumn Acres, a strange thing is happening. Retired folks, even those who moved away for jobs years ago, are moving back.”
Jillian didn’t want to talk. The worry about Gram was too great in her mind. She fought the urge to say that she was with him in this, no matter what they faced. But there was no time. Panic of what they might face with Gram made her heart pound double-time. Deep inside a thought formed. This must be what it feels like to care about someone.
Suddenly her grip was as tight around Connor’s fingers as his was around hers.
The tiny waiting room, which looked like it was furnished with someone’s leftover sixties furniture, was empty. Gram was in one of the birthing rooms being checked by a nurse practitioner who had a doctor looking on from a computer screen.
She looked up when they entered. “I have the doc on screen. He’s got one more patient at the clinic, then he’ll head over here.”
When Connor frowned, the nurse tagged Morrison, RN, added, “She’s stable. I’ll make her comfortable until he gets here.”
“I’m fine, Connor.” Gram smiled at them but no one missed the white-knuckle grip she held on Joe’s hand.
“Just relax, Gram. The doctor will be here soon.”
Gram shrugged. “I just saw him last week. Every time I go to that young man he puts me on another pill. I’ll be good as ever after he gives me another pill and then I’ll head over to the shop. I’ve got projects to finish.”
The nurse let Gram talk about all the things she needed to do as she checked her vitals and silently put in an IV, making everyone, except Gram apparently, aware that this was not going to be a short visit.
As the hours passed Jillian was impressed at how Connor took charge. He calmed Gram, talked to the doctor, signed forms, and made Joe sit down long enough to have his blood pressure checked.
While they waited for results on Gram, the dear old lady slept and Joe dozed in the chair beside her bed.
Connor offered his hand to Jillian as easily as if he’d done it a thousand times. Even in the bedlam he was comforting her. Pulling her out of the room, he leaned close and said, “It’s going to be a while.”
They walked down the hallway to a little room lined with vending machines.
“Can I buy you lunch?”
He turned loose of her hand and dug into his pocket for change.
“A Coke, nothing more. I had cookies for breakfast.”
He collected two Cokes and they went out on a winter patio, lined with vacant birdhouses. The sun was warm enough to almost make them believe it was comfortable outside, but Jillian barely noticed. She slowly realized that Gram was safe. They might be dealing with a broken leg, but she would recover.
Connor talked for a half hour about the town and Jillian realized how much he loved the place. He filled her in on all the people she’d met and their stories. Neither wanted to get into the what-ifs concerning Gram until they had the facts.
When the nurse came to get Connor, he was much more relaxed than when he’d hit the door.
Gram finally rested, no longer frightened. Both she and Joe looked like they’d been scrubbed free of mud. The staff made X-rays and ran several tests. While the waiting continued, the nurse named Morrison asked if she could spea
k with Connor in the hallway.
He tugged Jillian out of the room with him. Joe and Gram were busy arguing over what to watch on the tiny TV mounted so high up in the corner of the room no one could have seen any program well.
“Mr. Larady,” the nurse said after a moment of silence. “The doctor wanted to make sure you understand that this accident will not affect your grandmother’s condition, but that her condition likely caused it.”
“What condition?” Connor’s words were low, but they seemed to echo off the walls of the silent hallway.
“Her Alzheimer’s. Dr. Latham his been treating her for a year now, but the medicine only slows the progress.”
Jillian didn’t have to look at Connor. She could feel the shock, the pain, coursing from his body.
“She’s forgetful,” he said slowly. “She gets mixed up. She forgets words. She forgets if she’s eaten now and then.”
Jillian didn’t move, but she felt one tear slowly roll down her cheek.
“She walked away from a safe place,” the nurse added. “She put herself in danger.” The nurse’s tired eyes filled with sadness. “You didn’t know, did you, Connor?”
He didn’t have to answer.
Nurse Morrison flipped open a file. “When we informed her last year, she asked us to call her grandson Danny. His name was listed along with yours in our files.”
Connor leaned back against the wall as if all the energy had drained out of him all at once. “Gram gets our names mixed up sometimes.”
One more piece of proof, Jillian thought.
“Didn’t he call you to tell you? Didn’t Gram tell you?”
“No,” Connor answered without emotion. “He probably figured since I see her every day, I already knew. He’s busy. We don’t keep in touch.”
The nurse looked like she’d faced this dilemma before. “And did you know, Connor?”
He nodded. “On some level I think I did. I guess I chose to ignore it. I thought if I didn’t think about it, didn’t ask questions, that things would go on as always. Every time she forgot to do something, I just took over. I wanted to ignore all the signs.”
“That’s what Gram is doing, but you’ve got to deal with it from now on. Joe can’t handle it all.”
Connor straightened. “Joe knew?”
She nodded. “He was with her the day we tested her. The Autumn Acres bus brought her in for her checkup, but Joe was there just like he usually is. When they left, he must have driven her back because I heard him say that they were stopping for malts on the way home like it was just an ordinary day and an ordinary checkup.”
The nurse was called away by a beep on her phone.
Suddenly, Jillian was alone with Connor in a little hallway that smelled of antiseptic and old age. She had no idea what to say. Part of her wanted to yell that she was an alien and didn’t want to experience this kind of human pain. She’d lived her whole life away from people. Her father had been right. Don’t get involved. It hurts too much to watch, much less feel.
But she couldn’t turn away. Not this time.
As she leaned into him, he pulled her close. Hugging her.
For a while, they just stood here. She felt his heart beating, his breath drawing in and out.
Slowly, his tight muscles relaxed and she knew this strong man, who cared about an entire town, was taking on one more problem, one more worry, one more job.
Finally, he kissed the top of her head and pulled away. “Thanks. That was a great hug.”
She shoved a tear off her cheek. “You all right?”
“Yeah.”
“Plan to call your brother?”
“No. He knows. What else could I add?”
“But he steps out of all responsibility. Shouldn’t he help?”
Connor’s smile didn’t reach his eyes. “But don’t you see? I’m the lucky one. I get to be here. I get to help her through this. I get to know, when she’s gone, that I did all I could.”
He looked at her and she could tell he believed every word he said. “I’m the lucky one. I’ll walk with her through this. Maybe pay back an ounce of the ton of love she’s given me all my life.”
He pulled Jillian toward Gram’s room. “We’d better get back. You still with me, Sundance?”
“Yep,” she answered. Good or bad, she’d walk through this crisis with him.
As the afternoon aged, there were more tests. Connor left to go get Sunnie. Jillian stayed behind with Joe to watch Gram sleep. Hospitals, big or small, seem to have their own kind of time.
When Sunnie showed up, she crawled up beside Gram and asked one question after another until Joe said, “Now, Button, ease off. She’s all right.”
To everyone’s surprise, she stopped with the questions but stayed close to her great-grandmother.
Jillian watched the odd little family. They might be years apart in age and very different people, but there was a bond between them that didn’t seem to need words to convey their love.
Midafternoon the doctor arrived and banished the family to the tiny waiting room. After an hour he stepped out of Gram’s room long enough to say that he’d decided to keep Gram in care overnight. She’d suffered a fall that broke her fibula just below her knee, plus she had cuts deep enough to require a few stitches. He wanted to ease her pain but not overmedicate.
When they all crowded back into the small room, Gram greeted each as if she hadn’t seen them in days.
She kept telling everyone, including the doctor, to stop worrying about her, but he still wouldn’t let her go home.
Jillian felt like she was in the way. When Connor said he needed to go back to the office and at least lock up, she jumped at the chance to catch a ride. She wasn’t doing much good here, and Gram didn’t need more company. She’d seen airports with fewer people walking the hallways once the word got out that Gram was in the hospital.
After Connor kissed his grandmother, they silently moved out to his pickup. His touch was light along her back when they stepped outside, and lingered a moment longer as he helped her into the truck. The hug they’d shared had erased any awkwardness between them.
Finally, as he climbed in, he said, “As soon as I lock up my office, I’ll be back at the hospital if anyone is looking for me.”
“I think I’ll work a few hours cataloging quilts. I need to match my notes up with pictures.” She smiled. “When Gram is able, she’ll be back in the shop and wondering what I’ve been doing besides eating her stash of cookies.” Before, the timetable to finish the cataloging job was hers, and now Jillian felt like it was also Gram’s.
He nodded. “I’ll call if there is any change, but I think all she needs now is rest.”
She could hear the sadness in his voice. They both knew rest would not heal Gram, but it might mend her broken leg.
When he pulled up to the quilt shop, he asked, “How about I pick you up for dinner at seven? Where will you be, here or home?”
“You don’t have to...”
His smile was easy. “I owe you a meal. Joe and Sunnie can watch over Gram for an hour.”
“All right. I’ll be here. Call me when you’re on your way.”
His gaze held hers. “I think I needed you all day. Thanks for being there.”
She thought of saying that all she did was tag along, but maybe even Batman needed Robin on a bumpy ride.
She’d shown up to help and it felt good, even though they’d faced troubles.
14
Connor felt like his nerves had been scraped by a razor-sharp rake as he left Jillian on Main and headed back to the hospital. He knew Gram couldn’t live forever. Her mind was slipping. He’d even thought that it might be dementia. Old folks sometimes got that. But it was more. He hated that she’d been hurt and frightened in a town where she’d always felt safe.
He shoul
d have seen what was happening. He should have called the doctor. He should have...
When the nurse in the emergency room said the word Alzheimer’s she’d finally put a title to what he knew deep down was wrong. Connor felt his heart crack and reality flooded in. He’d talked about Gram’s memory loss, her mixing up words, but hearing that word somehow made it real. Joe had told him all people in their eighties forget things. Sunnie claimed Gram just had a lot on her mind. But at his core, Connor was a man who never lied to himself, and refusing to say the word wouldn’t make the truth disappear.
It was time he faced what lay ahead. For Gram. For Sunnie. And for him.
Taking the slow route through the district, he checked his office phone for messages. The silence of the forgotten area seemed to close in around him as he drove. The calm of the empty building offered him no peace. They reminded him of what Gram would be one day. Just a shell. Her rich memories would be gone.
Not all at once, but one piece at a time. A year from now or maybe five, he’d still be able to hug her, but she wouldn’t remember who he was.
The most important person who’d always been in his life, always loved him, would one day look at him as if he were a stranger.
He needed to take a few minutes to breathe, so he pulled into an alleyway and cut the engine. Relaxing against the back of the bench seat, Connor let his orderly mind piece together a plan. He’d return a few calls. A normal day. Let the Acres know Gram wouldn’t be coming back tonight. He’d make sure all was set at the hospital. He’d reassure Sunnie. He’d call the quilters. He’d take care of every detail in preparation for her to leave the hospital tomorrow.
With the last wing of Autumn Acres still not ready to move into, his only choice was to bring her to his house. They were not yet set up to handle round-the-clock nursing care. Between friends and family, they’d keep Gram company while he had to be gone, and the nurse had given him a number for in-home nursing.
Connor would make sure that when he wasn’t with her someone else would be.
