by Marie Force
“I really appreciate you coming with me to this.”
“You shouldn’t have to go alone.”
“Still… It’s above and beyond. And very nice of you.”
He glanced over at her and found her watching him intently. “What’s the matter? Did I cut myself shaving or something?”
“Nothing’s the matter. You just look really good. Handsome, I mean.” She laughed. “I’ve clearly forgotten how to give a compliment.”
“No, you haven’t. And thank you. You’re rather stunning yourself.”
She surprised him when she reached across the center console and took hold of the hand that had been resting on his leg. “I couldn’t sleep after you left last night. I just kept thinking about how great you were when I told you about Carl. It’s not easy for me to talk about that, and you made it easy. Thanks for that.”
“I’m sorry you went through what you did, but I’m glad it brought you to us.” And he was glad of that, no matter what might happen—or not happen—between them.
“I’m glad, too.” She held his hand all the way to the church. When he helped her out of the car, she again took hold of his hand as they joined the stream of people heading into the island’s Catholic church. It seemed as if the entire island had come out to honor the young mother who’d died far too soon.
Every pew in the church was filled to capacity when the pallbearers, including Mac and Shane McCarthy, led the casket into the church, followed by Seamus and Carolina, each of them holding the hand of one of Lisa’s sons. The sight of those solemn little boys, dressed in tiny suits and ties, brought tears to Paul’s eyes.
By the time the four of them were seated in the front row of the church, there wasn’t a dry eye to be found. Lisa’s longtime friends spoke of her big heart, her love for her sons, her affection for her friends and the island they called home. They talked about how hard she worked to support her family. Everything that was said about Lisa came down to her two boys, who’d been the center of her world.
Hope held his hand through the entire service, even when tears ran down her cheeks unchecked.
Lisa was buried in the island’s cemetery, which boasted a spectacular view of the ocean. Her little sons sprinkled dirt over her casket in yet another heartbreaking moment.
Paul slid an arm around Hope’s waist, and she leaned her head against his shoulder. He was grateful that she felt comfortable enough to lean on him, because he wanted to be there for her. But in the back of his mind, her words from earlier echoed loudly, reminding him to proceed with caution.
Everyone was invited to Stephanie’s Bistro, where Lisa had been a waitress, for refreshments after the service concluded.
“We don’t have to go to the reception,” Hope said when they were in his truck. “I should relieve Daisy.”
“She said she had no plans for the day and to take all the time you needed.”
“You have to work.”
Though he had a million things he needed to do before he left the island for a few days, he’d never say so to her. “It’s fine. Let’s go for a little while anyway.”
They arrived to a crowd outside the Sand & Surf Hotel. The hotel’s owners, Owen and Laura Lawry, stood by the front doors, welcoming everyone who came in.
Paul shook hands with Owen. “Hell of a turnout.”
“Lisa was well loved around here.”
“Are we all set for Saturday night?” Paul asked.
“Yep. Evan and I are looking forward to it.”
Paul had tried to hire them to play at Alex’s party, but his friends had insisted on doing it for free. “It’ll be a good time. I’ll see you then.” With his hand on Hope’s lower back, he guided her through the lobby to Stephanie’s Bistro, which was located inside the charming old hotel that had been lovingly restored by Owen and Laura.
Mac and his wife, Maddie, were standing right inside the door when Paul and Hope entered the restaurant. Paul shook hands with Mac and kissed Maddie’s cheek. “You guys have met Hope Russell, right?”
“Yes, of course,” Maddie said, shaking hands with Hope. “Mallory tells us you and Katie were a great help to everyone who cared for Lisa.”
“We did what we could,” Hope said. “It’s such a sad thing.”
“How’re the boys holding up?” Paul asked Mac.
“They’re a bit shell-shocked, of course, but Seamus and Carolina are doing everything they can to get them through it.”
“If there’s anything I can do,” Paul said, “I hope you’ll let me know.”
“There is one thing,” Mac said. “We’re going to be doing an addition to Seamus and Caro’s house and could use all the help we can get to finish it as quickly as possible. I know you’ve got a lot on your plate, but we’ll take whatever you can give.”
“I’m in, and Alex will want to help, too.”
“Appreciate it,” Mac said.
Though the restaurant was packed to the gills with people, Stephanie’s staff circulated with trays of Bloody Marys and mimosas as well as delicious hot hors d’oeuvres.
Paul reached for a Bloody Mary and then took a second one for Hope.
“I shouldn’t drink when I’m working later,” she said.
“One won’t hurt anything. Boss’s orders.” As soon as he referred to himself as her boss, he regretted it. But she only smiled and accepted the drink from him. They circulated around the room, stopping to talk to a variety of people Paul had known most of his life.
While Hope talked with Mallory and Katie, Paul took a moment to chat with Big Mac McCarthy, who’d been his Boy Scout leader growing up and was now a fellow town councilman. Paul had always looked up to Mr. McCarthy, and respected him even more after serving on the council with him over the last couple of years.
“Heard you were off-island,” Paul said after he shook hands with Big Mac.
“I was. Took Linda to Boston for the weekend, but we both wanted to be back for the funeral. Terrible thing this is.” He glanced at the two boys, who were seated at a nearby table, eating mac ’n’ cheese and chicken tenders. Seamus and Carolina were seated on either side of them, watching over them.
“It’s awful.”
“Thank goodness for Seamus and Caro,” Big Mac said. “Those boys have no idea how lucky they are to have such amazing people stepping up for them.”
“They’ll figure it out in time.”
“Yes, they will.” Big Mac glanced at Paul. “Couldn’t help but notice you’re awfully cozy with that lovely nurse.”
Paul’s gaze landed on her as she talked with her friends. “She is lovely,” Paul said with a sigh. He’d woken up with high hopes for them that had been effectively dashed with one offhand comment.
“You sound troubled, son. Is everything all right?”
Paul looked up to find Mr. McCarthy’s wise blue eyes trained intently upon him. “Could I ask you something?”
“Of course. What’s on your mind?”
“You knew my dad.”
“Knew him well and thought the world of him. Everyone did.”
“That’s really nice to hear. I miss him.” His gaze found Hope once again. He was helplessly drawn to her despite all the many reasons why he shouldn’t be. “He had a real thing about Alex and me getting involved with the employees. When we were in high school and college, the place was always crawling with summer help, many of them women—”
“I think I know where you’re going with this, and I had a similar rule with my boys. Last thing I needed was messy entanglements during the busiest months of the year. Not to mention, I was always a little afraid of getting sued by a disgruntled employee who failed to land one of the McCarthy boys. Sounds sort of silly, but you can never be too careful.”
“Yeah, true.”
“That said, your dad and I were dealing with boys and young men who hadn’t figured themselves out yet. You’re a full-grown man now, Paul, and everything is different. You know how to handle yourself in any situation, and I have
faith you’ll do the right thing no matter what. Your dad would certainly feel the same, especially in light of what you and Alex have done for your mom in recent years. He’d be very proud of both of you.”
Overwhelmed by his kind words, Paul had to gather himself before he could speak. “Thank you. That means so much coming from you.”
“At the risk of being presumptuous, I hope you know you can come to me any time you need a little paternal advice or wisdom. I’m always here for you, Paul.”
“I hope your kids know how lucky they are to have you.”
“Of course they do,” Big Mac said with a guffaw. “I tell them every day.”
Paul laughed at the big smile that accompanied the hilarious comment.
Mrs. McCarthy joined them, winding her hands around her husband’s arm. “What’ve you said to poor Paul, my dear?”
Paul wiped the tears from his eyes. “He’s just being his usual charming self.”
“That’s right,” Big Mac said.
“You about ready to go?” Linda asked her husband. “I’m babysitting PJ this afternoon.”
“Oh, hey, I want to go, too.”
She smiled indulgently at her husband. “As long as you don’t rile him up at naptime.”
“Now when have you ever known me to rile up anyone at naptime?”
She glanced at Paul. “Do you believe this baloney?”
“Um, no comment?” Paul asked with a grin.
“He’s a born politician,” Big Mac said, winking at Paul. “Let’s go see our grandson. Paul, I’ll see you this weekend at the party.”
“Looking forward to it.”
After they left, Paul went looking for Hope and found her at a table with Katie Lawry, Shane McCarthy, Abby Callahan and Adam McCarthy. Paul shook hands with Shane and Adam.
“Are you ready to go?” she asked.
“Whenever you are.”
They said their good-byes, ending at the table where Seamus and Carolina sat with Lisa’s boys. Hope ran her hands over their heads fondly and leaned down to kiss their cheeks. “Ethan and I would love to have you for a sleepover sometime soon,” Hope said. “Any time you’d like to come.”
“Thank you,” Kyle said for both of them. “That would be fun.”
“I’ll call Carolina to set it up.” She squatted so she’d be at their eye level. “I can only imagine how sad you must be feeling today, but I hope you know you have a lot of friends on this island.”
“Everyone has been so nice,” Kyle said.
“I’ll see you soon, okay?” Hope asked, kissing them both again.
“Okay,” Jackson said.
As they left the hotel, Paul noticed she was contending with tears. “That was sweet of you.”
“They’re great kids. I got to know them well when I was helping out with their mom. Ethan likes them, too. I’m glad to pitch in any way I can.”
They were quiet the rest of the way home and quickly absorbed into their usual routines when they got there. Paul took off to get in half a day at work, while Hope sent Daisy on her way and took over with Marion. Hope and Ethan weren’t at dinner, and he didn’t see her until nine o’clock that night when he took a beer out to the back porch and saw her coming out of the cabin.
“I was just coming to find you.” She came down the stairs from the cabin and crossed the yard, stopping just in front of where he was seated on the top step. “We’re still on the nine o’clock boat in the morning?”
“Yep. I talked to Joe earlier, and it’s all set.”
“Okay. I’ve got Ethan packed up to spend a few nights at your house with Jenny and Alex. It’s good of them to have him.”
“They don’t mind.” He looked up at her. “I called the place in Yarmouth. They only had one room available for the next two nights. I told them to hold it for us and I’d check with you about whether that’s okay.”
She crossed her arms into her favorite defensive pose. “It’s okay with me if it is with you.”
The words were strong and confident, but the waver in her voice gave away her true feelings.
Paul held out a hand to her. “Come sit for a minute.”
She took his hand and sat next to him on the step.
“We can go somewhere else if you’d be more comfortable with separate rooms.”
“I-I’m looking forward to the time alone with you,” she said. “It would be foolish to have separate rooms.”
“Before we go, there’s one thing we need to talk about.” Paul hated that he had to bring this up, but he had to know before he spent more time with her, before he fell deeper into whatever this was between them.
“What’s that?”
“What you said this morning to Jenny…”
“What did I say?” she asked, seeming genuinely baffled.
“About how you’d never get married again.”
“What about it?”
How to say this in a way that would make sense to both of them… “I’m thirty-four years old, Hope. At some point, I’d like to be married and have a family. I’ve done all the casual dating I want to do. If there’s absolutely no hope of ever getting there with you, I’d prefer to know that now rather than when it’s too late to turn back.”
“Oh.”
“Did you mean it?”
“Sort of.”
He wanted to ask her what that meant, but he waited, hoping she’d say more.
“After everything happened with Carl, I said I’d never get married again, and I meant it. I never wanted to be in such a vulnerable position again. Extricating my life from his was ugly and messy and costly. But that was then.”
“And now?” Paul held his breath in anticipation of her reply.
“I don’t know, Paul. I just don’t know. I wish I could tell you I’ve totally changed my mind, but I can’t say that for sure.”
“What happens if this thing between us gets serious and feelings are involved on both sides? What then?”
“I can’t speak for you, but I already have feelings for you. I want to see where they lead.”
He brought her hand to his lips. “I have feelings, too. But I’m not looking to get hurt any more than you are. Would you be willing to keep an open mind to all the many possibilities?”
“I suppose I could do that.”
“I don’t mean to put a ridiculous amount of pressure on you, but I just want to know going in that a future together isn’t outside the realm of possibility.”
“That’s fair enough.”
Paul dropped her hand and put his arm around her, bringing her in closer to him. “I’m really looking forward to the next few days.”
“So am I, but I feel guilty, too.”
“How come?”
“I’ve never spent a night away from Ethan, and I feel guilty for looking forward to it as much as I am.”
Her confession made him laugh. “He’ll be totally fine with Jenny and Alex.”
“I know, but still… What kind of mother looks forward to time away from her baby?”
“The best kind of mom. No need to feel guilty for taking a little time for yourself when you do so much for others.”
“If you say so.”
“I say so.” He kissed the top of her head and dropped his arm from around her shoulders. “I’m going to let you get to bed, and I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Sleep well.”
“I doubt I’ll sleep at all.”
“Why not?”
“I’ll be too busy thinking about two days alone with you.”
She surprised him for the second time that day when she turned toward him and kissed him.
Paul cupped her face and lost himself to the sweetness of her lips and the innocent seduction of her tongue. She had no idea what she did to him when she kissed him so tenderly. He wanted to devour her and had to remind himself that tonight was not the time for that.
Though it was the last thing he wanted to do, he backed off the kiss in slow increments. He leaned hi
s forehead against hers while continuing to stroke her cheek with his thumb. “Is it tomorrow yet?”
She laughed softly. “I wish.”
“I’m going to get up and go inside before I give in to the urge to walk you home and tuck you in.”
“Would that be so bad?”
Paul groaned. “I’m trying to do the right thing here.”
Her fingers slid down his arm to grasp his hand. “I really want you to tuck me in.”
Paul looked at her for a long moment, giving her time to change her mind. “Let me make sure Alex will be here with Mom.”
Chapter 14
Paul got up and went inside to see what Alex was doing, though part of him didn’t want to know. He encountered his brother in the hallway, wearing only a towel, which was a huge improvement over the night before.
“Hey, bro, what’s up?” Alex said.
“That’s what I was going to ask you.”
“Nothing much. Jenny is over at Erin’s, checking on her after she sprained her ankle. I was going to watch the Sox. You wanna join me?”
“Maybe later. I was going to go to Hope’s for a little while if you’re going to be here with Mom.”
“I’m here and not going anywhere.”
“All right, then. If I don’t see you tonight, I’ll see you in the morning before we leave.”
“Sounds good. You’re practicing safe sex, right?”
“Oh my God. Fuck off, will you?”
Alex bent in half laughing at his own joke.
“You’re such an asshole.”
“Paul Michael Martinez,” Marion yelled from her bedroom. “Watch your language.”
That set Alex off all over again.
This time Paul laughed, too. How could he not laugh at the incredible irony of how his mother’s dementia disappeared whenever one of them swore? “I’m outta here.”
“Mind your manners, Paul Michael.”
Paul flipped his brother the bird on the way to the back door, where Hope waited for him. “Let’s go,” he said.
She got up and went with him across the yard to her cabin. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. Alex was busting my balls.”
“Are you mad?”
“Nah, it was funny. And then Mom yelled at me for swearing at him. I got the full Paul Michael Martinez.”
