I carefully pulled apart the paper to reveal a black hinged box covered in velvet. My heart stopped. Every woman everywhere knows that’s the kind of box jewelry comes in. I ran my fingers over the softness, then slowly pulled it open.
I gasped and blinked. A platinum pendant necklace with a solitary diamond. My fingers trembled as I ran them over it. The diamond was large enough to cover my fingernail. In the center of the display were matching solitary diamond earrings. My breath quickened, and I had to sit. It was too much. Too incomprehensible.
A little card was tucked into the side, a little rectangle, as if the gift had come from the florist.
Wear these with it too. J.
Unbelievable. I shook my head, trying to shake it clear. The intercom buzzed again. I didn’t get my hopes up that it was Jay himself.
I buzzed up another delivery man, this one with a heavy cube. Inside was a bottle of perfume. Clive Christian. I’d never heard of it, but it looked expensive. Felt expensive. It even had a little crystal on the bottle. I sprayed a bit on my wrists then breathed in the heavenly scent. Once again there was a little card,
Wear this too. J.
When Jay? When would I get to wear all this for you? It’s really bad, in very poor taste. But I figured poor is what I am. I had to know. I tried Googling the jewelry but didn’t find it. I Googled the perfume. Fuck me. That’s not a crystal on the bottle, it’s another diamond. It cost more than the corset. Sure Jay, what’s a few grand on a bottle of perfume? And here’s me worrying about paying my mortgage.
The buzzer went again. A perfectly sized pair of shiny black Louboutin’s, again with the same note from Jay.
Wear these too. J.
The next time the buzzer went, it was Burberry overcoat.
Wear this too. J.
I reached for the disposable phone, I couldn’t take It any longer.
When do I get to wear all this stuff for you?
That sounded ungrateful. I tapped my fingernail against the screen, worried I sounded ungrateful. A few minutes later it chimed.
Friday, a car will pick you up at seven. Wear everything I’ve sent, and nothing else. J.
I stared at the message and read it again and again. My pussy moistened at the thought of leaving my condo in these gifts. Most of all, I was excited to see where he lives. I didn’t bother to text him back. I got the sense my texts were little annoyances for him.
Instead I typed a text to Jenny. A ‘you’ll never believe this,’ but then I deleted the words. For some reason I didn’t want to share this. Not yet. For now I wanted it all to myself. Wanted Jay to myself. And I wanted to fantasize about what he had in store for me.
To think about how I would style my hair to best show off the diamond earrings. That I would paint my nails to match the red on the bottom of the shoes. I even considered shaving a J into my pubic hair. No, I couldn’t be so tacky with all these elegant things.
Chapter 36
Once again I arrived at work early. Eager. I wanted to make a name for myself. To get these reports implemented. all the work I’d done at home was waiting for me in my email. It would be quick to get it onto the work’s system and match it up with the actual numbers.
I emailed Richard first thing, requesting a meeting to show him my ideas. I was giddy with excitement. This was my chance to shine, and I intended to make a big impact.
Sam turned up just before nine, I hurried her into my office and gave her a quick summary of my hotel stay with Jay. I hesitated, then went on with my story.
“On Saturday night he sent me a pile of gifts.”
Her eyes widened. “Gifts, huh?”
“Expensive ones. Perfume with a real diamond on it! Plus Louboutin’s.”
“Shut up!” she interrupted.
“That’s not all. He sent a massive diamond necklace and matching diamond earrings.”
The color drained from Sam’s face. It was difficult to comprehend. I’d spent Sunday looking at them over and over, trying to satisfy myself that they’re not a figment of my imagination.
And my insides clenched each time I imagined myself wearing it all for Jay. Okay, I may have put the entire outfit on once or twice and looked at myself in the bathroom mirror. Flashing myself with the trench coat. I wore the shoes all day, practicing walking in their impossible height.
“You are one lucky lady,” Sam said.
“No kidding, I was so lucky to meet him. But beyond all the gifts, I like him. A lot. I wouldn’t care if he was penniless.”
Richard walked past, and I shooed Sam away to catch him. My enthusiasm must have piqued his interest because he dropped wherever he was going and came into my office. I spend an hour going over my ideas with him and was encouraged by his response. He gave me the green light. Not only to implement the new reports but to hire two new people to do the grunt work.
He left my office, closing the door behind him, and I watched him walk past the glass walls back to his own office.
I sat back at my desk and checked my email. I’d intended to email Marla, to give her the job briefing and have her find me some new employees. My curser was on the compose button when an email from Calvin appeared in my box, the subject “James McAllister fucks his staff.”
* * *
Weird. Why would Calvin be emailing about the owner of our company? I didn’t know much about James McAllister, his office was three floors above mine. Who knows what went on up there in the upper echelons of the company? But Calvin’s name alone was enough to increase my pulse.
I clicked it open, the contents an instant kick to my stomach.
James McAllister fucks Abbie White in public and in exchange for a promotion
No other text was in the email. Only a picture. Of me straddling Jay topless at the lake.
I felt like my office chair was spinning me at ninety miles an hour. James McAllister? As in the founder of Force McAllister? Once I recovered from the shock of the intimate photo of me, I Googled James McAllister. Page after page of images of Jay came up.
His name wasn’t even Jay. James. James McAllister who three nights ago lied his face off and had said there were no more secrets between us. That I couldn’t take his picture because he was insecure about his looks. And I’d believed him. I grabbed my recycling bin and dry heaved into it.
Sam rushed into my office, pushing the door shut behind her. She was at my side, rubbing my back and hugging me. I stood and looked aimlessly around the room.
“Come on, I’m walking you home.”
“Look at the email Calvin just sent me. Jay Mickle is James McAllister.”
Sam looked at me as though she held a pistol to my temple. “Honey, he sent that email to the entire company.”
* * *
I collapsed in on myself but Sam’s arms were around me, holding me up. My mind crashed with the new information. As fast as they left my life, all my problems were back. And bigger. I couldn’t work here anymore. Not when everyone has seen the photo.
“No no no, this can’t be.” Who was I pleading with? Anyone. How did I get into another relationship built on lies? Why? I was adamant I would never have another man in my life because they can’t be trusted. None of them. I learned that from Matt. I swore off them, but I caved and went out with Jay. Jay, I mean James proved that beyond any shadow of a doubt.
“Honey, it’s okay, you’re going to be okay, you’re strong. You will get through this.” Sam kept her voice low as she rambled on, trying to comfort me. But the truth is there is no way out of this.
Through the glass walls, people kept walking past. Slowly. Peering in but trying to make it obvious they hadn’t come to laugh at me. Laugh at me naked and fucking in the woods. Laugh at me for being promoted for fucking the owner of the company. Were they also laughing because I didn’t know who I was fucking?
My office door flung open, bouncing off the wall behind it. Jay stormed in. James stormed in. Sam gripped me harder as he rushed over to us. He put his hand on Sam, attempti
ng to shove her off of me but she wouldn’t let go.
Chapter 37
“Leave, now,” he said to her through gritted teeth.
“Absolutely not.” She stood her ground. She would protect me. The traffic of people going past the glass office wall increased, their paces decreased. My heart pounded off the inside of my ribs, so hard I thought it would crack the bones. I couldn’t focus. It seemed like I was drunk, with things moving in and out of focus. Jay. Sam. The spectators. My memories of Matt. I heaved again.
“I said leave.” Jay’s voice was so ferocious Sam flinched. They stared into each other before Sam relaxed her hold on me.
She looked me in the eye, tucked a strand of hair behind my ear and said, “I'll wait right outside, I’ll be watching, making sure you’re okay. Is that okay? You signal if you want me to come back in. Answer me. Is that okay?"
I nodded, but the tears started. She kissed my cheek and left the office, closing the door behind her. I kept my eyes on her, to make sure she would watch and protect me. Sam flung her arms up at the nosy co-workers, ushering them away.
* * *
I couldn’t look at him. Jay. James. Whoever he was. I could never look at him again. My legs, drained of strength, gave out without Sam’s support and I sat.
“Abbie, I’m sorry this happened.”
Like sorry could fix this.
“I mean it.”
Like meaning it matters.
“Come with me, let me take you away from here and explain.”
Like this can be explained away.
The sobs fell harder each time he spoke. I reached for a Kleenex to wipe my nose. Then another. And another.
He rested his hand on my shoulder, I wiggled and turned my chair to break the contact.
“Abbie. You don’t know everything going on. Let me explain.”
That’s it. I snapped. “I don’t know everything going on because you’re a liar, Jay,” I spat his name. His fake name. “You’re a fucking liar. Jay or James or whatever the hell your name is.”
“I didn’t mean for you to get hurt.”
“Were you ever going to tell me?”
“I…”
“Don’t answer, because I don’t care what your answer is.” I turned and looked straight into his eyes. “James.”
He recoiled at my use of his name. His real name. James lifted his hand and stroked my hair. I spun my chair back away from him. Denying him the look on my face. The look of hurt. The look I’ve had before.
“Come on Abbie, I can take you away from this. Shield you from any fallout. It will go away. Things always go away. This will become a distant memory.”
The hurt melded into anger. “It’s on the internet. Nothing on the internet goes away. Ever!”
“It will. I will make this go away.”
“You can’t.”
“I can. It will. People are scrubbing the email. Staff have been notified that anyone saving it or emailing it on will immediately be terminated.”
“And you? Will you go away too? Because I never want to see your lying face again!”
* * *
He was the same as Matt. How did I become involved with two men who lied about who they were? Made up a complete personality. A complete history. I don’t know anything about either of them. Didn’t know who they really were, only who they made up.
Jay rested his hands on my shoulders. My body curled in response, trying to escape his touch. But he left them there, the weight heavy on me.
“I need you in my life. I waited so many years, watched you from afar. Wanting you.”
“But,” I struggled to get his words straight in my head. An entire new set of alarm bells screamed through my head. “But I’ve only worked here six months.”
James exhaled through his nose. I waited for an answer but none came. Instead he spun my chair around back to face him and crouched down looking straight into my eyes. I closed my eyes His hand stroked my cheek and cupped my face. I refused to open my eyes.
“I can fix this. I can make this right.”
“No you can’t. How can you make it right? There is nothing you can do. I will never forgive you.” My voice got quieter with each word. “You have ruined my career. You have ruined my life.” I didn’t have to strength to add how he’d hurt me the most.
“Abbie, your career isn’t ruined, not at all. You’re amazing, you’re smart, you’re intelligent. And your career is going to be fantastic.”
“No it isn’t. No one will hire me now. They’ll think I have no ability, that I just sleep my way to the top and nothing more. They’ll only hire me for that purpose.”
“That’s not going to happen.” His voice had been firm and metered every time he opened his mouth. A stark contrast to my own.
I took a few breaths to calm myself before speaking again. “You took the file from my desk, didn’t you?”
“Of course. You didn’t. I had to get rid of him and I needed the file to do it.”
“You only wanted to get rid of him to promote me! Because I’m fucking you!”
“No. I wanted to get rid of him because he’s incompetent. I wanted you promoted because you’re good at your job.”
At least that part is true. I am good at my job. I’m just going to have to move far away if I ever want to get one again. To somewhere that doesn’t have the internet yet. Like Timbuktu.
The anger rose from the pit of my stomach again. How could he do this to me? How did I let him?
“What were you thinking when I screamed the name Jay as I came?” I tried to keep my voice low, but I was yelling by the time I got to his name. His fake name.
“I won't apologize for that Abbie. There were reasons, good reasons and you need to understand that.”
His words hit me in my ribcage and I hyperventilated.
“You would not say that if you knew what Matt put me through.” I pushed each word out one by one, between my rapid breaths.
“I know.”
“No you don’t. You don’t understand at all or you’d never hurt me like this!” I stood, but his body trapped me behind my desk.
“Abbie,” he said, placing his hands on my waist, “I know he hurt you. I am not him.”
“But you’re just as bad as him.”
“No I’m not.”
“Matt destroyed me. And I thought there was just a little, tiny chance that I could be resurrected when I met you, but now, James, now I know there’s no hope.”
I tried to push past him. I needed out of there. Needed air. Needed Sam. Needed Jenny. He didn’t release me from his grip, his hands on my waist stopped my escape.
* * *
I stopped worrying about keeping my voice down. “Let me go. Leave. I never want to see you again.”
My eyes flicked through the glass, aware of more and more people on the other side of it. Looking in at me. Laughing at me. At least the humiliation Matt caused was only private. This is a public humiliation, and worse.
As if reading my mind, James said, “Don’t worry about them, they don’t know. They only know we have a relationship.”
“Had,” I said, my voice seething.
“Walk out of here with me. With my arm around you. I’ll take you away and we’ll get through this.” The comment caught me off guard and a wicked laughed emanated from my belly.
“We will not get through this Jay. I will not walk out of here with you. There is no us!” I waved my hands above my head, then tried to shove him off of me.
At the contact of my hands with his chest, he let go of me. He held his hands in front of him as he backed out from behind my desk. I grabbed my purse and hurried out the door, into Sam’s waiting arms.
She held my head to her chest and pushed us past the spectators.
Chapter 38
Sam held me all the way to my condo. I leaned into her, trusting her while I was blinded from my tears. Jenny arrived not long after and rushed to comfort me.
“My life is over,” I said
between sobs.
“No, it isn’t sweetie, I promise,” Jenny said, rubbing my back.
“Why did I ever agree to go to dinner with him?”
“Because you were attracted to him. And it didn’t work out. The end,” Sam said.
I turned to look at her through my watery eyes, “Yes, the end. No relationship. No career. No money to pay my mortgage. Only a big, gaping wound made by Matt and pissed in by Jay.”
“They’re different,” Jenny said.
“But he lied about who he was, just the way Matt did.”
“But his reason for lying was different. He lied to protect himself. Understandably. Whereas Matt…” Jenny’s voice trailed off.
“Matt lied to take advantage of me. Just like Jay.”
“I don’t know that that’s what Jay did,” Jenny said.
“Unbelievable. You’re taking his side?"
“No. Not at all. I’m just pointing out his motivation.”
“His motivation doesn't matter, he still lied. Confirmed my belief in all men. I don’t know why I ever let you convince me to go out with him. If I hadn’t, I wouldn’t be hurt right now.”
“But you had so much fun,” Jenny said.
“Sure, until his lie was exposed all over the internet! I wouldn’t be surprised if I’m on the six o’clock news.”
“And Facebook,” Sam added, bringing us mugs of coffee.
“Fucking Facebook. Everyone will know. Everyone I went to high school with. To college with. People I haven’t even met yet.”
“What will they know? That you, Abbie White, scored with a hot billionaire. That’s it. And they’ll be jealous,” Sam said.
I sat straighter and wiped my eyes. Maybe that’s true. My public humiliation is only limited to me looking like an employee sleeping with the boss. Explicitly. Naked in the photo as I straddled him topless in the woods. Thank God I’d still had my jeans on.
Dirty Billions: A Bad Boy Billionaire Romance: (A Chicago Suits Second Chance Romance) Page 29
