by Jesse Jordan
None of it effects my brain though, which is almost as frustrating. But Su Lin and I have spent the extra time doing so much together, talking and watching television. She’s been the best work assistant I could ask for, fetching information, running errands, even typing on a keyboard when I have to do something that I can’t arrange with the tablet and stylus I use now. Su Lin understands, I can’t just spend all my time vegging out watching Game of Thrones.
“So what color are you thinking today?” Su Lin asks as we get to my closet. “I’d say blue, just because I know you want a boy. And I’ll wear pink.”
“I thought you wanted a boy too?” I ask, and Su Lin nods. “Then why pink?”
“Because we should coordinate, not match,” she says with a laugh. “Let’s get your t-shirt first, then the thermal under.”
I do as much as I can to get dressed, even as my hands tremble slightly. It’s not the nerves, it’s that my muscles just can’t seem to maintain strength even long enough to pull on a shirt. Su Lin says nothing though as she helps me sit on the edge of the bed and change into thickly lined jeans and boots. “Okay,” she says after I’ve got my sweatshirt on, “let me run upstairs and I’ll get changed. Freida will pull the truck around.”
Freida’s actually faster than that, coming by and pushing me to the garage as Su Lin gets changed. I look over, seeing my Agera RS sitting unused in its parking spot. “Hey Freida, you want a slightly used car?”
Freida looks over, shaking her head. “No way am I handling that death machine.”
“You’re a licensed helicopter pilot, and you call my car a death machine?” I ask with a smirk. “You’ve got a strange sense of humor, you know that?”
“Nah,” Freida replies. “I just know that Su Lin will want to keep it, too. Maybe she’ll get into hurtling herself down the road at ridiculous speeds for fun.”
“I hope not,” I muse. “Speaking of which-”
“Su Lin filed the papers, until she gets remarried I’m to take over as the baby’s guardian if she dies.”
I shudder, and Freida pats my shoulder. “She won’t, Rick. She’s too strong.”
Su Lin joins us, and we get loaded up in the truck. I insist on standing up to get inside, even if it does leave me feeling like I used to after a set of heavy squats. My muscles quivering like jelly as Freida closes the back seat door, I lean back, catching my breath until Su Lin comes around and sits down. “Don’t worry, pretty soon I’ll have more problems getting in the truck than you,” she jokes, rubbing her belly. I reach over, resting my hand on her stomach and calming myself. “I know you probably can’t tell, but I can sometimes feel the baby squirm a little.”
“Maybe I’ll be able to feel a kick or two,” I comfort myself as Freida gets in and starts driving. It snowed like hell last night, March in Mankato is not spring yet, but the roads aren’t too bad so we don’t have to creep along. I’m torn between looking out the window at sights I might not get too many more chances to see again and Su Lin. Every day I’ve grown weaker, I’ve found myself caring more and more for her. Now, so close to what I know is going to be my death, I only wish I could tell her how I feel.
We get to the hospital, going up to see the head of the Obstetrics department, who’s agreed to take care of Su Lin personally. Going into the exam room, the doctor looks over at me. “How’re you doing today, Rick?”
“Planning on trying out for the Vikings come this summer,” I joke, not smiling because I know with my gauntness my smiles are looking more and more ghastly. “What’s Gordon telling you?”
“Nothing beyond he hopes I take good care of Mrs. Kelley here,” the doctor says. She helps Su Lin onto the exam table, turning her attention to her patient. “And how are you doing, Su Lin? Still having problems with toe pain?”
“No, I just have to remember not to do spinning jump kicks in wushu for a while,” Su Lin says. She pulls up her t-shirt, laying back as the OB spreads gel over her stomach. “This part I don’t like.”
“We’ll jump in the hot tub when we get home,” I joke, earning a smile from Su Lin.
“Actually, you’ll need to watch that,” the doctor says as she runs a functions check on the ultrasound machine. “Just make sure the water temperature isn’t above ninety five. I know that sounds warm, but for a hot tub that’s pretty cool. If it gets too warm for the baby, it’s not good.”
“Or too cold,” Freida says. “Don’t worry doctor, I have that mansion perfectly climate controlled. These two spend most of their days at seventy four degrees and forty percent humidity. Two degrees variation, and I’m calling the HVAC guys.”
We all get a chuckle as the doctor fires up the ultrasound. The scan takes a few seconds to find the baby, apparently my child is a squirmer. “Well now… here we are. Say hello, Mr. Kelley… wait a moment.”
“What?” I ask, fear sending enough adrenaline through my chest that I surge out of my wheelchair. “What is it?”
The doc studies the monitor for a moment, adjusting her wand before smiling. “I do believe… Mr. Kelley, Su Lin… say hello to your daughter… and your son.”
I gawk at the image on the screen as the computer enhances the image, and I see them. They’re hugging each other, so tightly embraced that tears come to my eyes. “How did we miss it?”
“Their heartbeats are identical,” the doctor says with a smile. “That’s very rare in fraternal twins, but in this case, it was so close that our sensors couldn’t tell. I’ve seen times when an ultrasound even won’t be able to tell until nearly the seven month point.”
Freida’s phone rings and she steps out after giving me a pat on the shoulder and Su Lin a kiss on the cheek. The door closes and I look at my wife, who’s crying tears of happiness as she looks at me. “Twins.”
“You’re going to be busy,” I say, smiling. “You sure you can handle twins?”
“Our daughter? Yes. Our son on the other hand… if he’s anything like his father, I’m going to have to hire two nannies, preferably one of them having a black belt in jiu-jitsu.”
I laugh, taking her hand. “I hope so. Listen, I had an idea, I’d like to record-”
The door opens, and Freida comes in, looking pissed off. “Rick… it’s Harvey.”
“What’s he want?” I ask, looking over my shoulder.
“He’s called another board meeting on the Pentagon contracts. For tomorrow morning.”
Su Lin
“Rick… what you’re doing is foolish,” I say for what feels like the hundredth time since Freida came into the exam room with her news. “Even Dr. Gordon says so.”
“I can’t miss this meeting,” Rick says, adjusting the knot on his tie. His hand is strong and steady, and if it wasn’t for the rolled up left sleeve on his arm connected to the IV bag hanging from the hook next to him, a quiet hum running from a pump that’s forcing his body to get pumped up, you wouldn’t know he’s dying. I don’t even want to know the contents of the bag, his second since we took off. “Your power of attorney doesn’t kick in until I’m comatose or dead. And without me there, Harvey can bully the rest of the board into supporting him. Once that’s done, it’d be too much damn work to turn the whole machine back around.”
“I understand,” I plead as a beep comes from the machine and Rick looks down. He removes his own IV needle, ignoring the trickle of blood until he can wipe himself up and put a bandage on it. “But why the drugs?”
“Because the board needs to see that I’m strong one last time to pass the torch to you,” Rick says, his eyes softening for a moment. “Su Lin, they need to see that you’re not just my wife, but that you have my strength. A shattered, dying man being rolled in a wheelchair into that board room would doom you to years of corporate bullshit infighting. I can’t saddle you with that.”
“We’re approaching Newark Airport,” Freida calls back over the intercom. “I’ve already got word the rental helicopter is warmed up and ready to go. It’ll land us right on the roof of the building.�
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“Thank you Freida,” Rick says, pushing the call button on his arm rest. He switches off and looks at me, his eyes still soft. “I have to do this, Su Lin. Please, give me a few minutes to get my mind ready. The drugs are only half the story.”
I nod sadly and go to the back of the Panther, changing for my own role in the boardroom. The suit, with its masculine shirt, pants, and tie seems on one hand to slightly defeminize me, but the jacket pinches my rapidly expanding stomach, the wide cut making my breasts look bigger and somehow making me even more feminine. I strap on my five inch high heels to bring me taller than some of the men we’ll be meeting. My hair and makeup also walk that line between powerfully masculine and seductively feminine, and looking at myself in the mirror, I understand what Rick wants me to do. I just wish we didn’t have to do it.
Freida comes on again, we’re on final approach and I go back up front, sitting down and buckling myself in just as Rick comes out of the bathroom. His face is set, his eyes blazing with the power and fury that I’ve only seen glimpses over in our marriage, usually when he was challenging himself in the gym or dealing with Harvey. Only once have I seen that type of fire directed at me, the night Drew Washington tried to seduce me. It’s breathtaking, and at the same time sad as Rick sits down, buckling in. No amount of drugs or mental fortitude can hide the fact that he’s lost close to fifty pounds in the past three months, the sharpness of his jawline and the hollowness of his eyes baring testament that he’s fading.
We land, Rick walking on his own down the stairway and to the waiting car that’s going to take us to the heliport. Only someone who doesn’t know Rick would notice that he used the handrail for balance, but other than that he walks like a man on a mission. Freida, done up perfectly in her skirt and suit top to look like our assistant, sits beside us as the helicopter fires up. “The agenda for the meeting-”
“Doesn’t matter,” Rick says, cutting off Freida. “If the whole thing lasts longer than thirty minutes, I’m going to lose. I can’t keep this up longer than that.”
“What did you pump into you?” Freida asks. “I saw one of the bags, glucose. What else?”
“Stimulants, anti-inflammatory steroids, and a laundry list of shit that would get any doctor who prescribed it to me to lose their license,” Rick says. “I think there’s an adrenaline shot in there too. I sent Gordon a list of what I’m taking, asked him if it would kill me. He said the odds were… acceptable.”
His words just up my tension as we take the quick flight from Newark to New York City, circling and landing on top of the H-S building only twelve minutes after taking off. There isn’t enough time to let my nerves get the best of me as we step out, the New York weather striking me as somehow warm. I don’t know why I notice, maybe I’m just getting acclimated to Minnesota, or perhaps I’m just in shock about all this.
The elevator down from the roof is deathly quiet, and when the doors open Rick leads Freida and I out, striding powerfully and purposefully towards the boardroom. His secretary for the New York office comes out of nowhere it seems with a hundred questions, but he blows right by her, Freida giving the woman a firm shake of her head. This isn’t the time. Rick doesn’t have it.
Rick hits the doors to the boardroom like a Spartan phalanx crunching upon the enemy, blowing the oaken barriers open like they were made of tissue paper. The board, with Harvey standing at the front and already talking, all turn their heads towards the commotion.
“Harvey!” Rick bellows, his eyes burning. “What the fuck are you even thinking?”
“Rick, what are you…?” Harvey Stone asks, looking surprised. “You’re supposed to be-”
“Yes, I know exactly what you thought about me, you stupid, slimy son of a bitch,” Rick says, slamming his palms down on the table. Maybe the board doesn’t notice, but I know he’s doing it to stay stronger on his feet. “You thought you could take advantage of my supposed physical weakness in order to slip some shit by me. But that’s not going to happen.”
“You’re delusional Rick,” Harvey says, trying to take control again. “You’re a very sick man, very sick. And I think that the board will back me in saying that your bad decisions have cost this company billions. I’m invoking bylaw sixty six of the charter.”
I glance over at Freida, who leans over. “Bylaw sixty six says that a board member or shareholder’s voice can be nullified if they are found to be incompetent.”
I nod, keeping my silence as Rick smirks. “You have to get the rest of the board’s approval, Harvey. It takes a unanimous vote of the other board members to invoke sixty-six.”
“Look at you Rick. You’re thin as a rail. Your mind is in a bad place, very bad. And I know you won’t consider the Pentagon contracts simply because you have this delusion that your ideas can somehow become weapons of mass destruction.”
“Not could be, but easily are,” Rick says. He reaches inside his jacket pocket and withdraws a memory stick that he hands to Freida. “Plug this into the projector screens.”
Freida goes over to the wall and opens a port, tapping at her tablet and inserting the memory stick. She nods to Rick, while Harvey tries to act unconcerned. “Rick, if you’re going to show us some science fiction, at least make it good.”
“Actually, this comes from NASA and the Department of Energy,” Rick says. “Don’t worry Harvey, it’s short and uses small words, so you’ll be able to keep up.” The screen on the far wall flashes to life and I watch as a jar of gloop pops up on screen. “This is the capacitance gel that our energy division is using in computing.”
I watch as a man in a lab coat adds a squirt of chemical to the jar, then stirs it up before removing an amount about the size of a peanut on the table. He quickly leaves with the rest of the gel. Moments later, the gel explodes in a reaction strong enough to totally destroy the lab table and damage other metal panels that I now see are set up at various distances. The shot changes to show that what I took to be a lab is in fact a large concrete room, and the explosion knocked over metal panels up to fifty feet away.
“That was capacitance gel mixed with another simple compound and hit with a laser of a certain color,” Rick says. “Less than an ounce, and it created an explosion the equivalent of four sticks of dynamite. The NASA guys I talked to say that if that much was loaded into an old fashioned five hundred pound steel casing and rigged with a simple timer connected to LEDs of the right color, it’d match a mid-range nuclear bomb.”
The board watches the explosion again before one of them speaks up. “What’s stopping someone from mixing that up right now?”
“The compound and the frequency of light that NASA used. Only I have that data, and thankfully… I’m the only one who does,” Rick replies. “This isn’t a joke to me, or some game, or a grab for politics. I’m protecting this planet and this country by saying keep the Pentagon away from K-S tech. The Air Force doesn’t need another generation of supercruise stealth aircraft armed with missiles that could level a city the size of New York without even being detected until the blast wave hits.”
“What’s stopping someone else from developing the same thing?” one of the board asks, and Rick shrugs.
“Nothing. Except the hope that by then, the rest of the world will have caught up. A balance, and hopefully we won’t have megalomaniacal overgrown children with delusions of godhood at the switches.” Rick gestures, and I step forward. “Harvey is wrong. He always will be on this issue. Do not invoke Bylaw Sixty Six.”
Rick stands straight, and walks around the table to stare Harvey in the eye. Harvey tries to get up, and Rick pushes him back down into his chair, a feat I didn’t think he was still capable of. “Why you fucking punk!” Harvey thunders. “I’ll see you fired, you son of a bitch!”
“You keep forgetting Harvey, I don’t work for you,” Rick growls. “Now, I call for the vote.”
It doesn’t take long for the vote to go Rick’s way, with the first three votes saying they were siding with Rick. Only
one other board member besides Harvey sided against Rick, and Rick nodded. “Good. Meeting adjourned. I don’t give a shit about the rest right now.”
Rick turns and heads for the door, leaving a sputtering, enraged Harvey behind him. “What are you doing? How do you-?”
“That’s what you get when you screw with people who are superior to you in every way,” Rick says, glaring over his shoulder before opening the door. “Don’t call another meeting Harvey on this. Or else I’ll be forced to take action myself.”
Rick
I jerk awake, looking around with confused eyes before I see her, the woman that I know I’m robbing of so much but I can’t seem to do anything about. “Su Lin?”
“We’re almost at the jet,” she says gently, squeezing my hand. I feel like hell, the IV is wearing off and I’m more exhausted than I’ve ever been in my life. “Do you need help?”
I nods, and she helps me down the steps of the helicopter, where I sway for a moment before steadying myself. “I had a dream,” I tell her as we get into the cart to take us to the jet. “Do me a favor, would you? Name our son Alexander.”
“And our daughter?” she asks, and I nod.
“Roxanna. She was Alexander’s wife, the mother of his only child. And it’s a pretty name.”
“I promise,” she says as we approach the jet. Mounting the steps is a Herculean task, and I have to use every ounce of strength I have left to climb the steps before my legs give out. Freida comes up and pushes on my lower back, taking my other arm to relieve Su Lin of some of the pressure as they help me onto one of the long couches nearest the door. Freida kneels and straps me in, and Su Lin sits behind me, cradling my head in her lap. “Don’t worry, we’ll be home soon.”
“Good. Su Lin… I’ve never felt for anyone the way I feel about you,” I whisper, trying to reach up and cup Su Lin’s face but everything goes gray, and I feel the world swim away.
