Mom defensively snaps, “Paige should not be punished for her brother’s problems. She’s a sweetheart who has never done anything illegal in her life!”
Dad adds, “There is no better girl than my daughter!”
Mrs. Cocker inhales and touches her husband’s arm. “This is not because of Paige, I assure you. My husband’s brother was romantically involved with an addict once upon a time. If my son loves Paige, and it was made very plain to me today that he does, then I’m sure she is wonderful and I can’t wait to get to know her better, and all of you. This is my husband’s issue that he needs to see an analyst about.”
“Jaimie!”
“You do, honey. It’s time to let what happened with Jason and Bernie go. No two situations are alike and you are acting like they are.”
He glares at her, turns on his heel and leaves the room.
My father growls under his breath, “If he says a bad word about Paige I will personally kick his teeth in. Excuse me, I have to go find my son!”
He charges out of the room.
That’s the nicest thing my father has ever said.
GABRIEL
Cracking my eyes open I see my sister and brother beside my hospital bed. Hannah gasps as Elijah runs a relieved hand down his face and groans, “You’re awake.”
“Where’s Paige,” I rasp. “Tell me she’s alive. I need…”
“She’s okay,” he says.
Hannah glances between us and adds while touching her neck. “She got cut up pretty badly but they had a plastic surgeon in to do the stitches. The driver had all the right insurance so that’s good. They should heal well.” Taking my hand, my sister whispers, “I didn’t know you were in love. Why didn’t you tell me? After our fight, I should have called.”
“Elijah told you,” I hoarsely whisper.
“Yes! But I wish it had come from you. I know it’s my fault. I’ve been…not great in the whole older sister department.” She drops her head and caresses my wrist. “I guess you’re not my ‘little brother’ anymore, huh? Guess I have to start thinking of you as a man.”
“Duh,” I smile, making her look me in the eye. “I tried to tell you that in Florida.”
“I know.”
We squeeze each other’s fingers as I glance to Elijah and ask, “Ethan’s baby?”
“She was born ‘bout an hour ago. They named her Kaya Marie Cocker.”
“Pretty.”
He nods and adds, “Dad and Mom are fighting about your girlfriend.”
Closing my eyes I grimace at the image. “Doesn’t fucking surprise me in the slightest. Go get her.”
“Mom?”
“Paige, you idiot. I need to see her.”
Elijah smirks. “I’m glad the truck didn’t rob you of your charming personality.”
“Or my life!” I smirk back. “I need more pain meds, too. How big was the thing?”
“Just a huge fucking truck. Not a semi, or you wouldn’t be here. I’ll see what I can do about getting your girl here.” He rakes determined fingers trough his hair, the other hand in his suit pocket as he strolls out of the room.
Hannah sighs and motions to dozens of elaborate flower arrangements stuffed into this small space. “Word got out.”
“How bad is it?”
“Uncle Jaxson is in jail. Uncle Jake beat up some paparazzi guy and crushed his extremely expensive equipment but since it’s Ethan’s child being born Uncle Jaxson told the police it was him. Clearly he wanted Jake to see the birth of his granddaughter! The photographer argued but when the cops heard, ‘Why would I want to go to jail? I broke the fucking camera!’ they took Uncle Jaxson away. Dad’s working on getting him out by tonight. Especially since he told them to do it.”
“Laughing hurts,” I grin. “Try to be less funny. Anyone else get in trouble for me?”
Ethan strolls in with a swaddled bundle in his arms. “Yeah, me. You stole my thunder you narcissist.” He twists to show me a sleeping baby girl whose tiny fingers are resting on the pink, fuzzy blanket. “Look what I made all by myself?”
Hannah laughs at his joke piggybacking on the narcissist comment, but I’m staring at the creature like the miracle she is. I can’t believe I want one of these now — that’s the miracle. “Give her to me.”
“Not a chance. She has to stay clear of germs and you’re a fucking mess, Gabriel. You get cleaned up and we’ll talk. I just wanted to show you, and make sure you’re okay.” He heads out, cooing to his daughter, “Your second cousin is an attention hog, Kaya Marie, so he went and got hit by a truck today. Yes, he did!”
Mom walks in, her gaze resting a moment on watching Ethan as a father. She turns her head and holds out her hand. I reach for it and our fingers squeeze. “Gabriel, you scared me. Don’t do that again. I’m going first, you understand?”
“Mom, don’t even talk about that.”
She kisses my forehead and whispers against it. “I love you so much it’s not even funny.”
“I love you, too.”
Straightening up she and Hannah share a look like this was not fun for either of them. Inhaling sharply to change the subject, Mom stiffly smiles, “Your father is angry with me. Did your brother and sister tell you what happened?”
“They said enough and I already knew it was going to be hard. He doesn’t like Paige.”
“He doesn’t know Paige!” she grumbles, pushing her long hair back. “But I met her, and she’s just adorable, honey.”
“She’s fucking beautiful, is what she is.”
Hannah laughs and shakes her head with Mom mirroring her.
My Uncle Jason, dad’s twin, sticks his head in the room. “How’s it going in here?” He glances around and sees it’s just the three of us. Locking eyes with me he strolls in wearing grey jeans and a blue, cotton, long sleeved shirt. Aunt Sarah, his much shorter wife turns the corner, pushing curly red hair from her face, wearing a dress that matches his shirt.
“Gabriel! You look like shit!”
“You gotta stop sugar coating things, Aunt Sarah.”
Since he mixes all my albums, Uncle Jason and I have that bond. We always talk business so he asks, “How was the tour?”
“Sold out in every city. Canada was hard. London got better…when I had company.” I hold his look with meaning.
His eyes narrow and he glances to Mom and Hannah since my comment was purposefully mysterious. “What’s this? Your boy meet someone?”
Mom smiles, “Yes. Maybe you can help us.”
“With what?”
“If Dad wants to be stubborn, let him!”
She touches my arm. “Don’t get upset. You need rest.”
My aunt and uncle are very interested in finding out what happened. Mom explains it to them as Hannah and I watch and wait. We’re expecting Uncle Jason to offer a solution but it’s Aunt Sarah who gives the key. “Well, that’s ridiculous. What does he think, that it’s contagious? Every family I’ve ever known has an addict or alcoholic in it. Look at my brother Nathan!”
Jason and Mom stare at her as the realization dawns on them. I know Nathan but not well. He lives in Detroit so we didn’t see him much at family functions over the years, but since he owns a comic book chain we loved it when he came to visit. He always brought all the best graphic novels, even showing us which ones were going to be huge before they hit big.
Hannah takes the words right out of my mouth. “I didn’t know Nathan ever had a problem.”
Uncle Jason mutters, “Excuse me. I’m going to find Justin.”
JUSTIN COCKER
I’m pacing outside, in one of those small under-furnished courtyards that can only be accessed from inside the hospital. No paparazzi here and nobody to bug me. Except Jason as he calls out, “There you are! I’ve been looking for you everywhere.”
“Don’t tell me my wife sent you to calm me down.”
Jason crosses his arms, eyeing me. “She did, actually.”
We are still the mirror image of each ot
her, my twin and I. Our hair has gone grey in the same way, solely at our temples. We’ve both stayed trim because our egos have kept our gym memberships paid up and used to their advantage. Our eyes, unlike my twin sons, are identical.
But Jason has always been a softie.
Playful.
Optimistic.
Me? Not so much.
“You don’t know the whole story,” I grumble. “I saw that kid when he was at the table, and afterward he was like a dog trying to get back in to finish a dried out bone. He had an out. We were there to save him. And he didn’t want it.”
“Sometimes it gets really bad before it gets better,” Jason says. “Not every time, but that’s how it is for some.”
“I don’t want Gabriel to have this in his life. That kid will always be a problem. He’ll want money. He’ll suck their time. And what about their kids?”
Jason’s eyebrows go up. “Are you saying my children are going to be addicts? Which one, Zoe? Samantha? Can’t be Max, he’s too wise. Maybe Wyatt? Hunter?”
Staring at him I make an annoyed face. “What the fuck are you talking about? Of course not! You didn’t marry Bernie!”
“I married Sarah whose brother was a heroin addict.” Jason pointedly looks at me, knowing I’d forgotten all about who Nathan used to be. I met him when he was clean — never thought twice about it after that. “We are talking about Paige’s brother, too, aren’t we? Just like my wife’s brother?”
Running a hand over my hair I pace away from him. “It’s not the same thing.”
“How is it not? Heroin is worse, isn’t it? More of a social stigma.”
“Nathan got clean!”
“So might Paige’s brother. Bernie finally got clean and you never thought she would. She teaches third grade now and has a family of her own. Would you condemn her today?”
Completely out of proportion to our discussion I explode, “Jason, I’m sick of your looking out for them! When are you going to learn?!”
He stares at me, dropping his arms and shoving his hands into his pockets. “You’re still pissed at me. Jaimie’s right.”
I’m blinking back fury, trying to get ahold of myself and on the verge of punching him. “NO!”
Jason gets in my face, locking in as he says in a determined and ready to fight me if he needs to voice, “Face it. You’re still hurt from when you watched what I did with Bernie. You were forced to sit there, unable to stop me or help me. And that was foreign to you, especially because you love me so much.” His finger jams into my chest. “You’re still scared for me in here. But I’m okay, Justin. It’s not happening anymore. You don’t have to protect me. It ended a long time ago before Jake even met Drew! That’s how fuckin’ long ago it was so you need to let this go. Talk to somebody, or write it out somewhere and burn the paper, I don’t know. Whatever it takes until it’s finally out of your system. Cry, punch something, scream in a dark alley, whatever it takes. But don’t do this, Justin.” He turns on his heel and walks away with that enigmatic statement in his wake.
I call after him, “Jason!” He stops. “Don’t do what?”
“Don’t come between your son and the woman he loves. Unless you want to lose him.” Holding my look he walks inside, leaving me out here wondering how we switched places. I was always the wise one. I’m the older brother. By two minutes, sure, but that matters, dammit.
The problem with the truth is that when you hear it you can’t ignore it. Some people try to stick their head back in the sand.
Me? Not so much.
PAIGE
Mr. Cocker knocks on the doorframe, looking around to find I’m alone now. “Can I have a minute of your time, Paige?”
Bracing myself I nod, terrified. Nobody will tell me where Gabriel is, and I think he’s why.
Mr. Cocker closes the door.
Oh God, here comes the gavel.
“Do you love my son?” he asks, meeting my scared eyes.
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“Because he’s a jerk,” I whisper, before I realize that would be my answer.
Mr. Cocker’s lips twitch. “Come again?”
“I mean, he’s stubborn. Irritating. Um…”
Frowning and side-eyeballing me, Mr. Cocker says, “No, go on.”
“He’s petulant.”
“Petulant?”
“He has a child’s temper.”
“I know what the word means, I just…never mind. Continue.”
“He’s extremely full of himself and sometimes doesn’t think about how his actions impact other people.”
“I see.”
“And if I lost him, life would be so awful and so boring.” Tears slide down my cheeks. “Gabriel makes me laugh. He surprises me. Pretty much everything he does is not what I would do. Sometimes when he’s really mad he doesn’t open the door for me and that keeps me on my toes, you know? It’s not because he’s being rude but because he’s so passionate, and his moods take over his whole body so he can’t control himself. He just explodes and runs off because his emotions are too much for him and he doesn’t know how to handle them. But I’ve learned to see him being rude as a barometer for him needing to be heard. So I just listen and ask questions and try to get him back from the cliff he walked out on. He never knows I’m doing that. But he needs it. Like the day we were in Verona and he’d just called Ben for the millionth time, Gabriel ran around like he might punch someone so I flashed him, lifted up my shirt, when there were three old ladies behind me. It took him so much by surprise that his anger vanished just like that! And he just started laughing. Do you know how good that felt? I know how to help him. And he makes me feel safe. I’ve never felt safe before.”
His father walks to the window and looks out, hands still stuffed away.
I think Elijah is right, they are alike.
Both are extremely guarded.
Or maybe discerning is the right word.
His voice is thoughtful as he says, “When Gabriel was a child he followed his brother everywhere, not the other way around. It was Elijah who led the way and I know that when he left for college, Gabriel was lost. He looked to my daughter, Hannah, for guidance but she was so used to ditching her younger brothers that she couldn’t see he needed a friend.” Mr. Cocker glances over and holds my eyes as he walks to the foot of my hospital bed. “Kids think their parents don’t see things, but we do. It’s the hardest part, that you have to let your kids stand on their own and choose their own paths. We have to let them fall on their faces, feel pain, so that they’re able to handle it when life serves it to them. And also, so that when achievement comes they know the joy of having earned it. I’m not talking just about careers, although that’s what I used to think mattered most. It doesn’t.” He pulls his hands from his pockets, one slides through his hair and the other dials his cell phone. “Excuse me while I send this text telling the hospital they can bring Gabriel here now.”
Blinking at him I wait for the phone to be put away again. “You were keeping us apart.”
“Yes.”
“Why did you change your mind?”
He smiles for the first time, and it makes him seem far less scary. “Your reasons for loving my son…I wish my wife had been here to witness them.” He chuckles to himself, “She would have described me in pretty much the same way when we met. But if the worst parts about him are what you consider the best, my doubts that you really do care for him are gone.”
Gabriel’s voice echoes from a distance, “Paige!” It gets louder as he keeps calling my name. “Paige! Paige!”
Mr. Cocker and I are watching the door. He doesn’t move to answer it, just waits for Gabriel to explode through, dragging a rolling IV unit with him, wires dangling from his arm.
Seeing him, tears spring up. He glances to his father and rushes to me. He stops from cupping my face as he sees the bandages. Bending to inspect them he has such protective concern in his eyes. “You okay, Beautiful?” He traces my cheeks with g
entle fingers.
“Now I am. Are you okay?”
“That fucking truck hit us! Why wasn’t it on my side of the car?” he moans. “Not yours!”
“You should wear hospital gowns more often, Gabriel.”
He stares at me, confused. Then starts laughing. “Stop it, it hurts to laugh! You like this? I had them give me two so my ass wasn’t hanging out. Fucking humiliating.” He kisses me and then presses our foreheads together. “I love you.”
“I’m so crazy about you,” I whisper.
Licking his lips he sits beside me and looks at his father, the shift in his expression powerful and quick. “Dad, I won’t let you—”
“Stop. I only came in here to tell Paige I’m glad to see she’s okay.” Mr. Cocker meets my eyes and winks. “But if I knew I’d have to see all this sentimental bullshit I’d have waited outside.” Rolling his eyes he strolls to the door. “Almost lost my lunch.”
“Dad!” Gabriel calls out.
His father stops, head dropping as he sees Gabriel’s face. “Not escaping that easily, am I.”
“I know you kept me in that fucking hospital room just now. You can’t do that shit anymore. Are you with me or against me? Because I’m going to marry Paige, Dad.”
I gasp, “Gabriel!” because this is the first time I’ve heard him say that. He ignores me, waiting for his dad’s answer.
Mr. Cocker’s amusement vanishes. “I’m sorry I did that. It seems I have some demons from my past I have to face. Your mother brought that to my attention. But I’ve spoken with Paige and for what it’s worth, not that you need it, I approve.”
As my heart twists with relief and happiness, Gabriel stands up. “I do need it, Dad.”
Mr. Cocker blinks away unexpected emotion, and his voice is gravelly as he says, “But you would’ve gone against my wishes anyway, had I not given you my approval.”
“Yes.”
A small smile flashes. “Then you’re a man now.” And with that he leaves.
Cocky Rockstar: Gabriel Cocker (Cocker Brothers of Atlanta Book 10) Page 16
