He chuckled softly. “Just give this willow bark a chance to get into my system first.” He eased back and swallowed another mouthful of tea, never taking his gaze off her face. “Have I ever told you how beautiful you are?”
Victoria’s heart lurched. She nibbled at the fingernail on her first finger, the heel of one foot bouncing up and down rapidly.
She shook her head.
He couldn’t be showing interest in her like this now! Not when he’d just come home badly injured and she’d decided with such finality that a lawman definitely wasn’t the kind of man for her. Forget his profession! Even if it weren’t for that, she simply didn’t deserve a man like Rocky.
Downing the last mouthful of the brew in his cup, he leaned forward and placed it on the tray Hannah had left for them. “Ria, getting shot has made me think through my life.” He cleared his throat. “I was laying there on the floor with Jason and Cade leaning over me, both of them acting like I wasn’t going to live to see the next minute, and I clearly remember I had one regret.” He looked up at her. “So let me put that regret to rest.” His deep brown eyes softened as they took in the lines of her face. “You are quite possibly the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”
Victoria realized she was holding her breath and let it go with a quick puff that came out on a nervous bit of laughter. She felt the burn as her face flushed crimson. She looked across the room, down into her lap, at his boots – anywhere but at his face. “Your one regret was that you’d never told me I was beautiful?” She peeked up at him, unable to resist the allure of his gaze.
“No.” He shook his head. “It was that I hadn’t ever courted you – gotten to know you better.”
Victoria blinked. He doesn’t know that I’m adopted. That reminder was like a douse of ice water on the flame of her beating heart. She took a calming breath. He at least needed to know that before he courted her. That might, after all, change his mind. Rocky didn’t know where she really came from. She didn’t even know her own lineage. What if she really did come from bad blood like Sarah Hollister had told her in the first grade? Rocky didn’t deserve to get stuck with that.
“I asked your mother’s permission last night to start courting you, and she granted it. Now I’m here asking you. Will you allow me the privilege to come calling?”
She pinched the bridge of her nose, then stood abruptly and paced the room like a corralled filly. She didn’t know how to tell him. Victoria stared at the floor as she paced, arms folded, blinking back tears. Why was he doing this now? After all these years? Just when she’d promised Mama this morning that she would consider his offer? Mama obviously knew what she was doing this morning when she extracted that promise!
And what about her own feelings? She pressed her lips together, thinking of his shoulder wound. A few inches lower and he wouldn’t be here to speak to her at all. What would she do if she agreed to allow him to court her, and then they ended up marrying? Part of her longed to agree. Oh! How she longed to agree. But life as a lawman was definitely dangerous, as proven by his recent near miss. What if later, perhaps after marriage and children, something should happen to him? She didn’t know how she would live through something like that. She already cared far too much. Mama was right. It was already unbearable to think of something happening to him. She didn’t want the hurt and worry to become worse. And she certainly didn’t deserve a man like him.
Behind her, Rocky cleared his throat. “Ria?”
Raising one hand to stop his questioning, she said, “I can’t talk about this right now. I’m going to miss the train if I stay here any longer.” Picking up her skirts with a rustle of satin, she started out of the room.
He sighed. “I’m coming with you. Just let me get the buggy for you.”
She spun around. “You can’t come with me! You’re already just about done in.”
Tears still blurred her vision when he stepped towards her. “Ria.” The word was a soft caress. He reached up, cupped her face, and traced her cheek with his thumb. “I know my job scares you.”
She closed her eyes and forced herself not to tilt her head into his touch as she whispered, “I wouldn’t be able to stand it, if…something happened and….” If only that were all of it.
He released a soft breath. “I don’t have an answer for that except I know God is in control of the future, and I won’t leave this world until it’s my time to go.” He paused and when she remained silent he continued. “Your words give me hope, though.”
She looked at him, rolling her upper lip between her teeth.
He grinned. “I didn’t know if you could care for me at all. Gives me hope that you wouldn’t be able to stand it if something happened to me.” He winked. “That’s a start.” His thumb caressed her cheek again, wiping away a tear that had spilled over. “Can you leave the future up to the Lord and at least give us a chance to get to know each other a little better?”
Silence filled the room. She didn’t know how to tell him that she didn’t think she could trust God with her heart. It was already in so many shattered pieces, she didn’t know if even God could put it back together. “There’s so much you don’t know about me, Rocky.”
“Mmmhmm. That’s why I want to spend more time with you.” He stepped back. “I’ll go get the buggy and you can give me your answer when you are ready.” Stopping at the door, he looked back. “I do know enough about you to know that everything I learn is only going to make me care more for you, not less.”
Victoria watched him walk out of the room, then her eyes slid shut. If only she could believe that were true. Once Rocky found out her parents hadn’t even wanted her, he might not want anything to do with her.
The train shuddered to a stop in the station with a huge puff of hissing sound. Miss Nickerson bustled down the aisle. “Come on children. Gather your bags. Quickly now.” She clapped her hands twice.
ChristyAnne helped Mera hop off the seat and slip on her coat, then she climbed up to stand on the bench so she could reach their bags in the overhead compartment. Mera stepped out into the aisle and turned, waiting for ChristyAnne to hand her one of the small suitcases they’d each been given before the trip west.
A large man with a thick drooping mustache, barreled up the aisle. He wore a round bowler hat that looked oddly small on his large round head, and clouds of cigar smoke spewed from his mouth.
How could he stand the smell? She wrinkled her nose as a gray waft enveloped her.
Without so much as pausing, he smacked Mera’s arm with his cane, pushing her aside as he hurried by, grumbling under his breath about the vile-blooded offspring of no-goods who couldn’t’ take care of their own children.
Mera rubbed her arm, large tears pooling in her big dark eyes as she watched him disappear out the door of the rail car. “That huht me!” Her lower lip pooched out.
ChristyAnne glared out the window as the fat man retreated and then handed Mera her little bag. “I’m sorry, Mera. I’ll give it a kiss in a minute, but first we have to hurry off the train or Miss Nickerson is gonna get mad at us.” She pulled her own case down. “Come on. Let’s go.” She hopped off the bench.
Mera toddled along in front of her, clutching her suitcase with both hands up near her chest. A kind-looking man in a cap smiled and helped Mera down the train steps.
“Much obliged,” ChristyAnne mumbled as she stepped down into the gravel of the train yard and adjusted her black sweater. She swallowed, pressing down her anxiety, and squatted in front of Mera to straighten her clothes. She had to make sure they both looked especially good.
Off to her right Miss Nickerson was admonishing the children to stay together, smile, be polite, speak only when spoken to, and the rest of the list of things they’d all heard at every train stop where they had been looked over since New York.
Mera’s eyes were wide as she took in the hustle and bustle of the station, her small case on the ground beside her. In front of them was the depot building. A large round clock
on the wall facing them proclaimed with bold black hands that it was five o’clock. Down the platform a ways, a boy about her age hawked newspapers and another offered to shine the shoes of anyone who passed his way. A man trundled by with a big stack of trunks and boxes on a rolling cart. One wheel needed some grease. It was squealing louder than Betty-Lou from back home had the time her arm got busted when she fell off the swing. The mean fat man in the bowler pushed the boy selling newspapers aside with his cane and tapped some of the ash from his cigar into the chipped, tin, change-cup of the shoe-shine boy.
“ChristyAnne!” Miss Nickerson jerked her hand in a motion to indicate she should pay attention and hurry-up all at the same time. The rest of the children were already in the single-file line headed for a small platform she could see just inside the depot doors.
Giving Mera’s jacket one last dusting, ChristyAnne bent and kissed her little sister’s arm, then captured her attention with a touch to her chin. “’Member to smile, ’kay?”
Mera nodded. “An’ fold my hands.” She mimicked the gesture ChristyAnne had taught her in hopes that their good behavior would win them a place to live. Together.
“Good. Now,” ChristyAnne hefted both their cases, “come on.”
Inside, the children all set their bags in a corner and climbed up onto the platform to stand in two rows facing a gathering crowd. ChristyAnne made sure she was standing directly behind Mera. Miss Nickerson began her remarks. She always said what wonderful hard-working children they were and that none of them would be any trouble, and if they were the Children’s Aid Society would take them back, so ChristyAnne didn’t pay attention to what she said. Instead, she scanned the crowd. Was there a new family waiting for her and Mera here? Off to one side of the crowd was a tall man in overalls. His wife stood beside him with a small frown on her face. They looked nice enough, but as soon as Miss Nickerson stopped talking they turned around and headed for the outside doors.
ChristyAnne sighed. That was the way of it. A lot of people just came out of curiosity to see what the orphan train was all about. Two men stepped forward. They looked like brothers. One bent and smiled at Jasper, one of the twins, while the other focused his attention on Jason. ChristyAnne swallowed. It looked like the twins were gonna be split up. But as Miss Nickerson gestured them over to the corner where her assistant would fill out the paperwork, ChristyAnne heard one of the men say, “We live on neighboring farms, so they’ll be able to see each other often.” She sighed. That brought some relief. At least the brothers wouldn’t lose track of each other. She turned to scan the crowd once more and blinked. The fat, mean man with the mustache was talking to Miss Nickerson!
“Sure, a fine dairy ve haf as you know. I vas talking to your father, yust the other day, and he told me a yob you had taken vith the Children’s Aid Society. Yes, my vife vould for some company be happy. Yust come out once you are done here. Ve vill look forward to haf you to dinner, ya!”
“Why thank you, Mr. Vandenvort.” Miss Nickerson patted the hair at the back of her head and adjusted her flowery hat. “It has been an honor to help these children find homes, but I have to say it is very nice to be home! And I would be happy to come to dinner tonight.”
ChristyAnne suppressed an eye-roll at her simpering tone.
The man nodded. “Good. The vife I will let know. Now, I need to vork in my dairy a strong young gal. Yust one.” He blew a ring of smoke towards the ceiling and turned to scan them all with watery blue eyes.
“Well! I have just the one!”
Miss Nickerson turned and looked directly at her, and ChristyAnne’s heart dropped with the speed of a stone.
4
Rocky pulled the buggy to a stop in front of the Salem depot and Victoria climbed down without waiting for him to help her. She could still see a small crowd inside around the platform. Oh good, we’re not too late. Rocky stepped up beside her, looking none too happy that she hadn’t waited for him to help her down. But she knew that any jostling caused him pain, his face already looked pinched and pale from the drive here.
She clutched her skirts in one hand and hurried towards the door.
The minute they stepped into the dim interior of the station, Victoria could tell something was wrong. Every eye in the room was fixed on the platform where the children stood. Even the agent behind the ticket counter peered over his spectacles to the other end of the depot. There were only three children left, two girls, one about ten and the other about five, and a boy of about twelve. Both girls had hair as dark as a raven’s wing, while the boy was blond and fair.
“I won’t go with him!” The older girl stomped her foot. “You can’t make me go with him, Miss Nickerson!” She clutched the younger girl to her.
Julia Nickerson! Victoria blinked. So that’s where she’s been.
“N-N-Now y-yust you vait vun m-minute!” Victoria recognized Mr. Vandenvort from the large dairy just outside of town. She often stopped by his place on the way home from Salem and bought fresh milk for the orphanage.
The ten-year-old girl was clutching the younger one to her and glowering at him with enough venom to obliterate an entire country. His face red, and his mustache trembling, he sputtered and stuttered.
“Well! I never!” Julia fanned herself with a lace hanky as she gaped at the girls.
Biting the inside of her cheek, Victoria shouldered her way through the mesmerized crowd. It was quite obvious that Mr. Vandenvort, Mr. V to all of the locals, wanted only one of the girls, the older one by the looks of it, and she was having nothing to do with being separated from her sister. Dear Lord give me wisdom! “Excuse me?”
Every eye in the room turned on her. Rocky stood right beside her, his Stetson clutched in one hand.
“I would hate to see the girls separated. I would love to take them home with me.”
Tears sprang into the older girl’s eyes and she turned a hopeful gaze on Julia.
“Victoria!” Julia gasped. “Of course,” her attention settled on Rocky and Victoria could almost hear her purring as she continued, “I should have expected to see you here. Hello, Rocky.” She cocked out one hip and sidled a step closer to him.
Rocky nodded. “Julia.”
Mr. Vandenvort huffed and gestured with his cigar to the girl. “Miss Victoria, you don’t vant that- that- that—. She yust told me she vould all of my cows kill if I made her come home vith me!”
The little girl glared fiery darts at Mr. V. “Just take me home and see if I don’t!”
Beside her Rocky scuffed his feet, and Victoria had the distinct impression he was suppressing a laugh.
“Oh, dear Lord have mercy!” Julia tore her gaze away from Rocky and pinned the little girl with a glare. “What did you tell that woman at the last stop, young lady?” She grabbed the older girl’s arm. “I thought it awfully strange that she hustled you back inside so fast after all the paperwork had been signed and everything!”
Victoria bit back a grin at that. “I’m sure the girl is just a little frightened and wants to stay with her sister. Like I said, I would be happy to take them both, Julia.”
She did smile then, at the girl, hoping to reassure her that everything would be alright now. The younger child peeked up from where she clutched her sister’s skirts, lifting her face just far enough to cast a quick look at Victoria. As soon as she met Victoria’s glance she turned and hid her face again.
“I see I vas right! No plans I had to take home a child. Then I think to myself, maybe it vould be good to have some extra help around the place, ya?” Mr. V snorted. “These are nothing but varmints!” His glare encompassed each of the three children in turn. “Of spurious knaves, these offspring are! Those vat cannot take care of themselves, or discipline their children, yust like all along I suspected! Trouble like that, I von’t have coming to vork for me!” Mr. V slapped his bowler onto his head and spun around so quickly that he had to take a sideways step to catch his balance. He stormed away muttering under his breath about how the child
needed someone to teach her respect and discipline.
Victoria’s face paled as she watched him stalk across the room and slam through the front doors. She had never known what an awful man he was! His wife usually helped her when she stopped by for milk.
Rocky touched her elbow and cleared his throat, bringing her focus back to the children still on the platform. The older girl had slumped with relief, her arms wrapped tightly around her younger sister and cheek resting on her head. The boy was shuffling his feet and scanning the crowd, a look of wounded hope undisguised by his big frown. Victoria had seen that, why does no one want me? look on too many little faces.
The crowd dispersed, and no one stepped forward to take the children home. Somewhere a luggage cart with a squeaky wheel started moving and a train whistle sounded off in the distance.
Victoria stepped towards Julia who was still fanning herself with her now limp hanky, a look of dazed befuddlement on her face as she stared across the depot. Touching her shoulder, Victoria said, “We would like to take them.” Her gesture included Rocky and the three children. “You know I do this every year and I’ve always found good homes for the children I’ve taken back to Shiloh.”
Julia ignored her for so long that she finally took a step back uncertainly.
Then the woman blinked and looked at her, stood erect, tucked the hanky up her sleeve and smoothed the front of her dress with trembling fingers. She glanced from the huddled girls back to Victoria and Rocky. “You’re sure?”
Victoria nodded.
“Well, I’m shocked, really. Why anyone would want that child after the things she just said! It’s beyond me, really. But a relief. Yes, quite a relief.” Smoothing her fingers over the front of her skirt she stepped briskly over to the only four people that remained in the depot – her assistant, filling out the paperwork with a man and his wife who had a small girl clutched in her arms. Gesturing to Rocky, she said, “This woman would like to take the remaining children back to the orphanage in Shiloh. See to them as soon as you are done here.”
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