I have lived every day with the fear of even eating in me own home and the worry of what might happen to this wee child once it emerged into this cruel world.
Yet God, in his mercy, granted a boon. While Simon was called out of town on a special business meeting, I went into labor and delivered from the depths of myself this child so beautiful as to rend me heart asunder.
The plan I hereby set into motion came to me in the midst of me birth pains and I dare not hesitate another day for two reasons thus.
One being that with each beat of me heart I grow to love this child of hope endless measure upon measure more than I could have ever imagined.
And the second that Simon could arrive home any day and I dare not risk her life at his hand.
I take the time to set down these words, only that she may someday know the great pain her departure causes me and the unfathomable depth of me love for her.
Like the mother of Moses, I set this child of my heart into the hands of the Living God and pray He guides her to ones who will love her as much as I ever could and who will point her to the only One who gives Life.
I made her a doll. Some small token that one day she may caress and wonder what the woman who stitched it looked like. In it lies her key to Great Happiness. Please keep it with the child.
Penned this twenty-first day of July in the year of our Lord 1870,
Maggie McKenna Saunders.
Hannah snatched the letter from her grasp almost before she had time to finish the last line. “What did thet last paragraph say?” she asked.
“Great Happiness!?” Rocky snapped his fingers and arched his brows at Hannah.
She scanned the page, running her finger down until it paused near the bottom. “In it lies her key to Great Happiness….” She glanced up, a dazed look on her face. “Well, if thet don’t beat all.” A wide white smile splitting her face, she leapt to her feet. “Ya’ll stay here. I’ll be back just as soon as ever I can.” And with that she bustled out the door muttering excitedly to herself.
Everyone glanced at each other questioningly. Everyone seemed bewildered but Rocky. “This is going to be good,” he declared.
“What is?” Victoria tipped her head to one side.
He just grinned and winked. “My lips are sealed.”
Victoria frowned, but then decided to drop it until Hannah returned.
By the time they’d tucked the girls into Rocky’s old bed upstairs and were coming back down, Hannah had arrived. Under her arm she carried a small wooden ship. She set it down in the middle of the dining table with a flourish and stepped back settling her hands on her hips.
“My Zeb he give this to me just two weeks before he was killed. He worked on this every chance he got, night and day for nigh onto a month. I thought he’d done taken leave of ’is senses. But when he got it all built he give it to me. I teased him somethin’ fierce about the name he give it. But he said I was his great happiness.” She turned the boat so everyone in the room could read the name painted in a gently sloping scrawl across the stern of the ship. Great Happiness.
Victoria gasped. In it lies her key to Great Happiness.
Hannah gently laid the ship on its side. “See here? He done carved each o’ these tiny little round windows in the side toward the front, jus’ like on a real ship. Only one day I noticed thet it looked like he made a mistake on one. See this one right here?” Hannah pointed to a port hole that had a small rectangular hole perpendicular to the circular one.
Victoria touched it. “A key hole.”
Hannah nodded. “Least wise we’ll soon find out if it is. Now where’s thet key?”
Rocky patted his front shirt pocket and then pulled out the small silver-gray key.
The room seemed to still as he inserted the key into the hole and turned it. There was a faint click and then the top half of the ship separated from the bottom. A canvas sack filled the narrow cavity. Rocky lifted it out and dumped the contents onto the table.
A smaller bag, heavy and bulging, thunked to the table followed by two inch thick stacks of hundred dollar United States Treasury bank notes each wrapped with a band of paper, and two folded squares of paper.
Victoria gasped in unison with everyone else. Her legs lost their strength and she plunked down into the chair that thankfully was directly behind her. Thousands of dollars.
Rocky glanced at her with a grin. “You okay?”
She nodded, one hand at the base of her throat.
One of the notes was to Hannah from her husband. The other was addressed to “My Dear Daughter.” The bag was full of gold coins each individually wrapped in squares of cotton presumably to keep them from jangling together and drawing premature attention to the treasure in the ship’s belly.
“Hannah you read your note first.”
Hannah folded open the paper with her name on it, her hands trembling so badly, she could barely smooth out the paper.
My dearest Hannah,
You readin’ this, it means I’ve done gone on to my reward. I wish thet weren’t so, cause I wanted to stay around and grow old with you, darlin’.
Hannah’s voice wavered and she paused to clear her throat.
But we cain’t always have things our way. The Good Lawd, He asks us to do hard things sometimes and I hope, if I’m done gone on, He helped me make a God fearin’ decision there at my end.
Miss Maggie and I talked. I wanted to include you on what we was doin’ but Miss Maggie, she didn’t want no harm to come to you on account o’ her bad choices. She figured the less you knew the better.
We both decided thet if something were to happen to us, you would follow that cute little red-headed snippet of a gal to the ends o’ the earth, ’fore you’d let her outta your sight. And we also knew you wouldn’t allow yourself to be parted from this, my last gift to you. An’ I recon if you’s readin’ this thet we was right.
Keep the faith, darlin’. One o’ these days we’s gonna see each other again.
All my love is ever yours,
Zeb.
Hannah clutched the letter to her breast, closed her eyes and tipped her face toward the ceiling, tears leaving glistening tracks on her dark cheeks.
Victoria stood, wrapped one arm around her and rested her head on Hannah’s ample shoulder. “I’m so sorry, Hannah”
Hannah patted her and dashed the tears from her face. “None o’ this is your fault. Don’t you worry none about ol’ Hannah. Now, what’s thet other letter say?”
Pressing her lips together, Victoria slowly opened the second square of paper and smoothed it flat against the table.
It wasn’t a letter but a signed statement of Maggie’s wishes.
I suppose since I did marry him, this money legally belongs to one Simon Saunders. I can only hope that by the time this money is found, he has either repented of his ways, or gone on to his eternal destiny. Yet if this money is found and he is still alive, I do hereby declare that it is my wish that all this money go to my daughter. I do not know what her name may be at the finding of this letter, but she has a small red birthmark in the shape of a heart on the back of her right shoulder. Simon deserves none of it, for he is a cruel man who will only use it for evil.
Penned this twenty-first day of July in the year of our Lord 1870,
Maggie McKenna Saunders.
Victoria met Rocky’s gaze. “Will that hold up in court?”
He settled one hand at the base of her neck. “I don’t know, but it will help.”
“An’ I’ll certainly be happy to testify to the fact that he shot my Zeb and thet it was his push thet caused Miss Maggie’s passin’.”
Sean stood and stretched his hands above his head. “Judge Bowman is a good man. I think we have enough evidence that Simon will probably face a trial before the week is out. Until then, I’ll have to keep all this,” he waved his hand toward the scattered items on the table, “in the safe down at the jail until the trial is over.”
Victoria suddenly felt weak
with relief. So many things had happened in the last few hours. She turned to Rocky, “Let’s go home.”
He pulled her to him for a moment. “Sounds good. Sounds mighty good.”
27
Victoria sat on her bed, alternately clenching her hands in her lap and plucking at the quilt beside her as she stared at the inside of her bedroom door. Rocky had gone out to take care of the stock and he would be coming back any minute.
She closed her eyes and pressed her lips together, willing away the trembling in her limbs and praying for the strength to do what she wanted to do, but was terrified to do all at the same time.
Since the girls had already been asleep, Sean and Rachel had insisted that they leave them be and let them sleep. And at the crestfallen look on Jimmy’s face, Sean had said he needed a man’s help around the place and asked Jimmy if he’d be willing to stay over and help him with a project in the barn the next day.
Victoria and Rocky were alone in the house, or would be when he got back inside.
She remembered Hannah’s words from just a few mornings ago about keeping Rocky happy in the bedroom and heat surged into her cheeks. She leapt to her feet, jerked open her door and marched out into the kitchen, her heels clicking loudly on the plank floor. She would need some warm water to clean Rocky’s shoulder again.
She worked the pump handle until the kettle had enough water, set it on the stove, and added pine kindling to the fire so it would burn rapid and hot. Rocky hadn’t come in yet, so she grabbed the broom from the corner and swept the already clean floor, then wiped down the sideboard and the table, even though she knew she’d already done it earlier, and straightened the chairs. Still no Rocky.
With a little groan of impatience she stomped over to the sink and pulled back a corner of the curtain to peek out into the darkness. “I don’t know the first thing about keeping a man happy in the bedroom!”
A soft chuckle echoed from behind her.
With a gasp she spun around.
Rocky grinned at her and pushed his hat back on his head. Leaning against the closed door, arms folded across his chest, he raked her with an assessing gaze.
“How did you—” She clutched the material at the throat of her dress.
He shrugged. “You were walking towards the window when I opened the door.”
Her face flamed and she looked at the floor then back at his shoulder. “We need to get that cleaned up and bandaged again.”
He nodded.
“Ria.” He stepped over and stopped in front of her.
She closed her eyes and her shoulders relaxed of their own free will. Today when he’d been pinned to the floor and nearly beaten unconscious by Baxter Cane she’d suddenly realized that what her mother had been telling her all along was true. She loved Rocky, and keeping him at arm’s length, wouldn’t make it hurt any less if he were killed. And all she’d been able to think about was all the opportunities she’d missed to share a bit of joy, laughter, or happiness with him, because she’d been too afraid to let him into her heart. Well no more. That ended tonight. She opened her eyes and studied him.
His left eye was swollen shut and black and blue, and a cut puckered the corner of his upper lip, but he was the most handsome man she’d ever seen. Standing on tiptoes she grasped a double handful of his shirt and softly pressed her lips to his. Her eyes fell shut with a sigh of satisfaction as she dropped back down to her normal height. “I love you, Rocky Jordan.”
Then she brushed past him and gestured for him to take a seat in one of the chairs. She sloshed some of the warm water into the waiting bowl and dropped a clean rag in, too. But when she turned for the table, she gasped and almost spilled all the water on the floor. Rocky hadn’t taken a seat as directed, but stood close behind her.
He took the bowl from her and set it on the sideboard. Then slipped his fingers back into her hair and rested his forehead against hers.
Heaven help her she was having a hard time thinking.
He studied her, working one corner of his lower lip with his teeth. “You gonna be okay?”
About the incident today? Yes. About the fact that she was trying to find a way to invite him into her bedroom? Never in a million years…. She scrambled for a reply that was honest and settled for a change of subject that she hoped would be safe. “Let’s look at your shoulder.”
He shook his head, his hands still cupping her face. “Say it again, Ria.”
She smiled faintly, “Let’s look at your shoulder.”
He chuckled.
But then she dropped the act and looked at him, wanting with all her heart for him to see the truth in her face. “I love you, Rocky Jordan. More than you will ever know.”
His lips grazed across hers. “I love you, too. I’m so glad you are safe.” And with a sigh of satisfaction he stepped back and gestured to his shoulder. “It was hurting quite a bit after chores but it feels better now.” His gaze never left hers as he took off his Stetson and hooked it over the post of one of the chairs. He reached into his pocket, pulled out a fresh bandage and set it on the table, then started to unbutton his shirt.
Have mercy! “Good.” The word came out on a tiny squeak as she darted a look towards the corner of the ceiling. She swallowed, her hands fluttering and finding no place to rest. Safe, indeed! “That’s good.”
She heard the fabric’s soft caress as he draped the shirt over the back of a chair. He unbuckled his ever-present gun belt and hung it on its hook by the door. The chair scraped across the floor as he pulled it out and sat down. And still she did not look at him.
He waited quietly, the heat of his gaze warming her neck.
She took a fortifying breath. I can do this. Deliberately she dropped her gaze to his.
Amusement danced in the depths of his dark eyes.
Irritation rising, her brows peaked. He seemed to be quite entertained by this whole ordeal. She pressed her lips together and lowered her study still further.
Taut muscles filled out the expanse of his chest, the clean perimeter of the bandage on his shoulder standing in stark contrast to sun-browned skin.
She must have stared for a long time, because suddenly he was grinning at her and holding out the round roll of clean white bandages.
She cleared her throat, stepped closer, and took the roll in trembling fingers. Carefully she examined the wound. She dipped the cloth from the warm water and wet down the bandage so she could pull it loose without causing more damage.
As she worked she tried to ignore the intensity in his expression as he studied her face.
She sponged the dried blood from his shoulder and pressed gently. There appeared to be no infection and the bleeding had stopped. The memory of the fact that she could have lost him today sizzled through her, and her fingers trembled to the point of uselessness. “Today when Bax—Simon…when he was…” She blinked tears away. “I thought you were…going to die. And all I could think about was how sorry I was that I’d never let myself fully love you.”
All amusement left his face. “Ria.” The word was a hoarse whisper. His hands settled softly around her waist
She jumped and rested her hands on his shoulders, dropping the new bandage. It rolled across the room, but when she started after it he tightened his grip. She looked down into his face, holding her breath.
Why have I been fighting this? She didn’t want to fight it anymore. Hadn’t wanted to fight it for several days now. “I’m sorry, Rocky. I love you so much.”
His lips were just below hers and his gaze darted across her features hungrily. He swallowed. “Just say the word and I’ll stop.” His thumbs rubbed up and down in short strokes against her side. And his breath dusted warmth across her lips as he slowly leaned toward her.
She closed her eyes and curled her mouth into a flat line, but pushed back the familiar lie that wanted to crawl from her throat. She was letting go. Letting go of fear and worry. All she had was today and she was going to live it to the fullest.
She
tilted her face down until her lips pressed, gently coaxing, against the line of his mouth. As he responded to her kiss, her stomach rode a wave of pure pleasure and she relaxed into him, her fingers sliding of their own will into the hair at the back of his head.
With a low groan, he stood and pulled her against him. His breath came short and fast as his mouth slanted over hers.
Desire prickled her skin and she pressed herself closer to him.
His lips trailed a searing path across her jaw to the soft skin just below her ear. He splayed his fingers against her neck and pushed her a fraction of an inch back, his thumbs caressing the rapid pulse beating at the hollow of her throat.
She’d never seen such heat in his eyes.
He swallowed, his gaze roving over her face. “Tell me now if you don’t want this.”
“I can’t,” she whispered. All the air had seemingly been sucked out of the room. She was finding it hard to pull in a breath. “I do want this. You. Me. Forever.”
“You’re sure?”
She nodded, took his hand, and led him to her room. And as his head tilted toward her once more, she silently uttered a fleeting prayer. Lord, please don’t ever take this man from me.
28
The faint hint of approaching dawn had barely penetrated the darkness of their room the next morning when Victoria woke to find Rocky studying her intently, one of her curls wrapped around his finger. His eye was swollen completely shut, his lip had doubled in size, and the whole left side of his face was oddly discolored, even in this light. Never had she seen a more welcome site.
The Shepherd's Heart Series: A Boxed Set Book Bundle Collection Volumes 1-4 Page 84
