“Stand aside, Rief.”
“I’m sorry,” he muttered, trying to take the painting down. “Just don’t look at it. I’ll destroy it, I swear.”
“You will do no such thing!”
The harsh tone made Rief freeze.
Mathew put one hand on Rief’s stomach and gently pushed him back. His heart raced as the flickering light and occasional bursts of lightning exposed the painting.
The image was of a storm-tossed sea, the angry sky done in streaks of onyx, ebony, and ochre. A tall ship lay crippled in the distance, violent waves crashing over it. Hints of purple, white, and gold created the illusion of lightning. A grouping of rocks on the shoreline anchored the bottom of the painting.
And standing in the water was Mathew.
Naked.
Hand outstretched, the painted image of him crooked his finger, leaning into the room. Beckoning victims out of the storm or perhaps into it. Blue eyes that stared at him every day in the mirror were rendered larger than life, sly and confident. Seductive. Rief had used his unique ability to paint light on highlights in the hair, catching the flash of lightning. Far more sculpted than any man had a right to be, the bare chest shimmered with luminescent droplets.
Mathew flushed hot and sweat beaded his brow. The carnal intentions of the painting were so obvious that his cock stirred and he didn’t know where to look—at Rief or this lewd fantasy of him.
Having a hard time breathing, Mathew pulled the tail of his bowtie until he could get at his collar to pop the button loose. He swallowed the lump in his throat, finding it difficult to get enough air into his lungs as he took in the enticing, confident image of a man Mathew only wished he could be.
He wiped his forehead with the back of his hand, struggling for something to say. “It’s just so... sexual.”
Rief chuckled.
His jaw dropped. “Have you lost your mind, man? Do you know how much trouble we would be in if someone saw this?”
Sobering instantly, Rief hung his head. “I know.”
Pressing trembling hands to flushed cheeks, he could not tear his eyes from the painting. The lips on the canvas were pink and swollen, as if they’d just been kissed, hard. Had Mathew looked like that after the lighthouse? And though the waves stopped just shy of revealing him, the outline of a hard cock lurked beneath the water. The next wave would reveal him fully.
“You were a bit generous, I should think,” he said, gesturing to the overly large endowment.
Rief had the decency to look ashamed. “I’m sorry.”
“Please don’t apologize. It’s amazing.”
“You’re not angry?”
“No... well? Maybe.” Mathew sighed. “I have no idea what to think, but no, I don’t think I’m angry. I am glad you don’t sell your paintings. I would hate to see myself bandied about London, nude and exaggerated. Or worse, hung upon the wall in some molly house.” He sniffed in disparaging amusement. “Though that might be the only place fit for it.”
“I would never part with this.”
He flinched at the closeness of Rief’s voice. He stood directly behind Mathew, the heat from his chest all but burning into him while warm breath ghosted across his neck. Mathew trembled when another rumble of thunder filled the room, working up from his toes and reverberating throughout his body.
Reaching forward, Rief pointed at the canvas, his inner arm brushing Mathew’s shoulder. “This is how I see you,” he explained in a hushed voice. “Temptation, desire, and beauty all at once.”
A visceral bolt of arousal shot through him. What could he say to that?
Then Rief stepped away, placing his back to him, the lines of his shoulders suddenly rigid. “Why did you really come here?” he asked, void of all emotion. “And don’t say to bring me a book.”
Embarrassment and confusion at Rief’s change in mood made him stutter. “I-I think you know w-why I came here.”
Rief’s head tipped to the side, but he did not turn around. “Why?”
Did he expect him to say it aloud?
Taking a tremulous breath, Mathew struggled to find the words, but the emotions inside him were so new, too terrifying to give them voice. He glanced away, the erotic painting staring at him with accusation. Mocking him, because he could never be as bold as the doppelganger of color and oil.
What if Rief realized he was nothing like the man he’d painted?
Mathew was not powerful or alluring. He was weak with wanting, desperate with loneliness. Indecisive and scared. Living in fear for years. All alone, even in a crowded room.
He glanced back at Rief, and a whisper of light fought to escape the darkness. He might not be the man in the painting, but he had to try.
For both their sakes.
Latching on to hope, he boldly forged ahead, “You ask me why I am here? How could I not seek you out? Every day I wake up knowing that I am destined to be alone, yet with just a few words, you’ve shown me that life isn’t as hopeless as I once imagined. When we speak, it’s as if I am speaking to my own soul. How can a man turn his back on a connection such as that?”
Rief turned at his confession, coming toward him fast.
Mathew instinctively withdrew from the dark hurt in his eyes, but Rief kept coming until his back was against the wall. “You made it pretty clear you think I’m no better than a thief, Matt. So why pretty this up with talk of friendship and loneliness? The only thing lonely is your cock.”
“H-how dare y-you?” he sputtered, their bodies now less than a hairsbreadth apart. “You make it sound so... so dirty. I’m a gentleman. I came here to extend the hand of friendship.”
Rief looked sad and weary despite his dominant posturing. His entire being withered right before Mathew’s eyes. “Friends or lovers, Matt? State your intentions now. If you do not want both, you should leave, for I cannot survive anything less from you.”
Emboldened, Mathew met the gaze of the man who changed the very course of his life. A man he wanted so badly that he had risked discovery, betraying the vows of denial he’d placed upon himself. Releasing a shuddery breath, he let the words tumble out, allowing his heart full sway of his mouth and damming the consequences.
“I want to be your friend and your lover,” Mathew declared, staring deep into those pained eyes. “It has been my greatest wish since the beginning. I have long been afraid to go after what I want, but it is not that way when I am with you. I want you. I want this.” Before he lost what courage he’d gained, he placed a trembling hand on Rief’s chest, his voice wavering as he asked, “How can you not know that by now?”
With a muffled cry, Rief melted against him.
The instant he felt the heat of Rief’s body, Mathew kissed him, unable to hinder their desires a moment longer. Blood pounding, throbbing all the way to his groin, he poured all the passion and intensity that years of denial had left in their wake into the harmony of their mouths.
Rief groaned against his lips, pressing closer and wrapping arms around his waist. In a burst of fervor, their tongues battled, bodies rolled. A physical reflection of a bond between body and heart. Outside, the rain grew in tempo, pounding faster than Mathew’s pulse. Louder still were their ragged breaths filling the air along with the howl of the gale. The world fell away and it was only Rief in his arms, feeling better than anything he’d ever dreamed.
Fingers pulled at the waist of his trousers. “I need you,” Rief panted.
Overcome, his head lolled back. “Yes, please!”
Almost frantic, Rief unfastened the buttons on his trousers and slid a hand inside.
When manly skin touched his bare flesh for the first time, Mathew cried out fast, “Oh dear God in heaven!”
Rief chuckled, drawing his eye. His expression was heady with lust as he fondled Mathew’s bare length. Wincing when the skin pulled, he held still and let the man explore, the riot of feelings paralyzing him. Rief cupped his balls and gave them a gentle squeeze, a sharp sensation hitting him faster than a lightning strike.
Instantly, Rief withdrew his hand. “Did I hurt you?”
Blinking fast, he tried to process his overwhelmed senses. When he saw the concern in those hazel eyes, he gave an awkward smile. “Yes... well, no. I don’t really think it hurt, but it just feels so... intense.”
“This’ll make it easier.” Rief spit in his palm and held it out for him to do the same.
Appalled a bit, but aroused, he followed suit.
As promised, when that spit-soaked hand slid back into his pants, Mathew groaned, his entire body on fire. Rief slowly, gently began spreading the wetness. Hands trembling, he held on to Rief’s arms and gave in to the pleasure of his reverent touch, savoring the new sensation of having someone else’s hand on his cock.
Whimpering, he thrust his hips, the caresses too slow and tortuous after a while. “Faster.”
Rather than listen, Rief released him. There was no time to protest, because the man was opening his own trousers. Impatient, Mathew fumbled to lower his all the way too.
“Oh, uh... oh...,” he muttered incoherently when Rief licked his palm then took both of their cocks in one large, wet hand and began to stroke. “Yes, yes... oh!”
Chest heaving, Rief buried his face in Mathew’s neck, inhaling, nipping, and kissing. He used his chin to push aside the detachable collar, and it fell to the ground, fully exposing his throat. “You’re so beautiful. So much more beautiful than I ever thought you would be. So much more beautiful than I’ve ever painted.”
Men weren’t supposed to be beautiful, but the way Rief whispered those endearments, with his hand caressing his hard cock across Mathew’s, lips nibbling at his Adam’s apple with almost reverent worship, he wanted to be beautiful.
Beautiful to Rief.
Thunder rolled across the ocean and hard bursts of sporadic rain splattered against the building. Compelled to touch, Mathew reached between their bodies to join their hands. Rief’s cock was so warm, thicker and longer than his. More menacing, more... glorious!
He grappled to feel all of the length, loving the velvety heat of the firm flesh beneath his fingers. He rolled a thumb over Rief’s cock head, surprised by the amount of fluid leaking from the tip. Rief groaned when he spread the natural lubricant, the copious amount easing their strokes.
Rief shifted his hand to the back of Mathew’s cock and they pressed their palms together, erections meshed between. With Rief’s hand on one side of his shaft and his cock against the other, they moved, attempting to find a rhythm that gave them both pleasure.
Bending his knees, Rief widened his stance to keep them in alignment, thrusting his hips. When something soft nudged at Mathew’s sensitive balls, he realized it must be Rief’s sac swaying into his own. Despite the spit, the skin on his cock pulled, but he didn’t want it to end. He never wanted this to end!
“Kiss me,” Mathew pleaded or demanded, he couldn’t be sure.
Rief cupped his face with both hands and devoured his mouth, rousing their passion to the point of no return. Mathew gripped their cocks as they pulsed, desperate to stay connected from mouth to foot. Rief was longer, and when Mathew squeezed up their shafts, Mathew’s tip pressed against the bottom of his rim. One hand keeping a hold of their cocks, his other struggled to pleasure the end of Rief’s longer organ.
Rief pulled his mouth away, shuddering. “Feels so good....”
He clung to Mathew’s face and neck, panting as Mathew worked their erections. Hot breaths huffed in his ear, and Rief’s abdomen rolled against the back of his hand.
Damn, it was too much!
Rief’s cock, so hard and wet against his own. Those big balls slapping his. The scent of the man’s sweat. The heat of his skin and the taste of manly kisses. All of it caused Mathew’s desire to reach a crescendo while thunder exploded on the other side of the windows, rattling the building.
“Please, look at me, Matt,” he begged, his voice rough and needy, fingers tangling in his hair now. “Please!”
A fantastic display of lightning crackled in the night sky exposing their hedonistic passions. He stared into those hazel eyes, so full of affection. Needing an end to this magnificent madness, Mathew took complete control, stroking them faster. Rief’s leakage aided the frantic race to the finish. Groans and whimpers filled the air. Pressing their foreheads together, Rief gripped his hair, holding on tight as Mathew brought them both home.
“Yes, yes,” Rief hissed in encouragement.
“Uh-ahhh!” He shuddered hard as seed shot from his cock.
Face contorted, Rief thrust, too, joining Mathew. While they emptied their load upon each other, their gazes never broke apart, as if seeing right into the most intimate places of their souls.
No one could ever take this away, for in that solitary instant of time, they belonged to each other.
Quivering, cock spent and tingling, Mathew stilled his soaked hands. His head spun and his skin flushed, his mind lost to clouds and winds of deliverance. Never had he been so high. His blood pounded so loudly in his ears he could barely hear the rain howling outside.
Rief kissed him on the mouth, this time soft and gentle—a lover’s kiss of contentment and appreciation. Then he reached between their bodies, stroking and playing with the stickiness on their cocks.
Mathew winced. “It’s sensitive now.”
“I know. I have one too.” He rolled the wet organs between his fingers gently, and they both chuckled, kissing in between capturing their breaths.
Mathew’s laughter faded into a ragged exhale as emotions bubbled up inside him, both confusing and frightening. He had waited a lifetime for this, and it felt perfect, terrifying, and exciting all at once.
Tonight was his first taste of love and his last moment of innocence.
There was no going back now.
His throat tightened and tears pricked his eyes.
Stiffening, Rief drew back. “What’s wrong?”
“This... I never... we shouldn’t have....” He didn’t know why he was crying, but once the first tear escaped, he couldn’t stop the rest from following.
Whatever turmoil warred inside him, Rief misunderstood it.
He took an abrupt step back, wrestling to pull up his pants. “You should just go.”
“Wh-what? Why?” Cock hanging out of his trousers, Mathew wiped at his face. “Damnation!” he cursed when, shocked and a bit disgusted, he smeared their release on his cheek.
Rief tossed him a cloth lying on the table.
Careful to find a place void of paint, Mathew wiped his face then dried his hand. He dabbed at the splashes of seed on his shirttails.
Still the tears kept coming.
“What is it?” Rief growled. “Why the hell are you crying?”
The harsh tone made him jump, once more the man’s mood shifting faster than the weather at sea. Yet when he looked at Rief, embarrassment hid behind that expression, not anger. His tears were hurting Rief for some reason.
Not grasping why he would feel that way, Mathew tried to give voice to his emotions, to make Rief understand. “This... I don’t know. I’m happy, but ashamed, and....”
“You got what you wanted. Maybe you should just leave.”
“But why?” he asked in a small voice, the stained cloth the only thing he had to dry tears that seemed to have no end.
Bunching his hands at his sides, Rief put his back to him. “If you’re so disgusted by me, then just go. Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone you were here. I’ll get rid of the painting.”
“What? If I were disgusted, would I have let you touch me? Would I have said that I wanted to be your lover and your friend?”
“Men say a lot of things to get their prick off.”
“You damn fool,” Mathew muttered, his hackles rising as he yanked his trousers up. Although he tempered his voice, the tears continued, making words intended to be strong, sound pitiful and weak as he stuffed his shirt into place. “How could I ever be disgusted by you? I w
anted you from the moment I felt your body against mine in the sea, and you know it! I just didn’t realize I would feel all of these things afterward. It’s so confusing. The painting you made. How I feel... I’m an engaged man, and I’ve never....” He struggled to make sense of everything, but found no answers. The desire to shout for joy and the reality of what all of this meant for his future battled for control. “This was my first... my first anything! And I just—I’m scared, dammit!”
Rief rushed him and Mathew flinched. For a flash, he feared what might happen, yet much to his relief Rief folded him into a fierce embrace.
“It’s okay,” Rief whispered, voice breaking. “I’m sorry!”
The shelter of his arms recalled the panic and confusion, and Mathew melted against him. “I’m sorry too! Please don’t be angry. I don’t know why I’m crying.”
“Shhh, it’s okay,” he said, raining little kisses all over his face and neck, holding him close. “I’m not angry at you. I can’t be. Not after all this time.”
Mathew clung to him. “I don’t want to be scared, not of this. Not with you.”
But he was scared.
He would never be the same. He could never forget tonight or how right it felt. Nor could he forget in the eyes of the world, he was now nothing but a depraved criminal.
How could something so wonderful be so forbidden?
Rief tightened his arms, crushing him a bit. “Come on, now, no more tears. I know this is scary, but you’re gonna be fine, Matt. I promise.”
“I am scared, but I wanted this,” he whispered against his neck. “And not just with any man. I came here for you. I only want you, Rief. Only you!”
Pulling back, Rief cupped his cheeks, wiping the tears away with his thumbs. “I’m sorry I overreacted. I didn’t mean to ruin your first time. It’s just that I thought... I thought you regretted being with me.”
“Never!”
It was Rief’s turn to kiss him, hard and possessive. Mathew met him with an equal hunger, relishing the beauty of finally having the one thing he’d denied himself, the one thing he craved more that the very air he breathed.
Drawing back, he cupped Rief’s face in his hands, forcing him to meet his eye. “I will never regret this, because for the first time in my life, I’m right where I belong.”
Wrecked Page 13
