No doubt that Mum’s praying had freaked her out. That or she was trying to get out of eating “our” food.
Half an hour went by, and still, Lucy hadn’t come out. Lillian had noticed she’d gone too because she kept throwing me questioning glances.
Lillian was really pissed at me, just like I knew she would be. But I hadn’t wanted to leave Lucy alone in the apartment this morning, not with how erratic her breathing had been lately. I’d asked Lillian about Lucy’s breathing again—after she’d finished telling me off—and she replied the same way as last time.
‘I’m working on it, Billy. I’m doing everything I can.’
Gabby crept up beside me, kissed my cheek, and wrapped her arm around my waist. ‘I have new girl at work, Billy. She very pretty. Good worker. Great cook. Your age.’
I blurted out a disbelieving laugh. Gabby was just like Mum, forever trying to set me up.
‘No way, Gabby. I love you, you know that. But I’m not gonna let you hook me up.’
She narrowed her playful eyes at me. ‘But you so handsome, Billy. Don’t waste it. And she will take care of you. You deserve that, no?’
‘What about you, Gabs?’ I said, teasing her. ‘No man in your life? You’re what, thirty now? Shouldn’t we be trying to find your Mr. Right?’
She giggled nervously, and I could’ve sworn her eyes darted to Charlie. ‘Too busy with my café. And why you don’t bring Lucy to see me? I like Lucy. She such a beautiful girl. So quiet. She need to be around us more. We can bring out her voice.’
My muscles clenched thinking about Lucy, and I flicked a glance inside the house.
Forty minutes and still no sign of her.
‘I’ll bring her round sometime soon, promise.’
Gabby smiled. ‘Good. Now go eat,’ she ordered before strolling off to chat with Lillian.
I walked through the house, checking both bathrooms, the bedrooms, and the formal living area. Nothing. Lucy was nowhere.
And then I remembered the laundry.
I stepped cautiously down the hallway to the back of the house. The laundry door was shut, making my stomach tighten. I considered knocking, but decided not to, and turning the knob slowly, I opened the door so it didn’t make a sound.
Lucy stood against the wall, her eyes shut, her face ashen, and her hands dangling loosely by her sides. I took one step inside, and her eyes flung open.
She squealed in shock and threw her hand to her chest, gasping in fright.
I jumped back. ‘Fuck, Lucy! You scared the shit out of me!’
It took her way too long to catch her breath.
‘I scared you?’ she gasped.
‘What are you doing in here?’
Sweat beaded on her forehead. Her chest rose and fell in short, rapid bursts, and I could hardly hear her faint voice.
I stepped in closer, so we stood chest to chest. ‘What’s going on?’ I asked, more urgently this time.
‘I just needed some time out.’
I narrowed my eyes at her, unconvinced she was telling the truth. ‘You must be hungry. You haven’t eaten anything today.’
She didn’t bother responding.
‘Is it too much?’ I asked. ‘Too loud? Too many people?’ I kept at her, desperate to get something—anything—from her.
‘No, it’s not too much. It’s … different … but not too much.’
My jaw clenched, and my expression hardened. ‘There’s that fucking word again,’ I said, unable to control my words from spitting out with hurt.
Her eyes widened, and she shook her head. I turned my back, ready to march out when she grabbed my arm, her grip weak.
‘I don’t mean that in a bad way. It just is what it is. And it’s different for me. But I like it. I really like it.’
Every word felt forced, as if she didn’t have enough air to speak. Like every syllable required more energy than she had. My anger cooled. I cupped her cheeks between my hands and looked into her tired eyes.
‘What’s wrong, Lucy?’
‘Lillian is such a beautiful person.’
‘Lucy …’
‘Inside and out, Billy. She’s made of pure gold.’
‘Stop avoiding the damn question! What’s wrong?’
Despite my snapping, she reached out and caressed my face, gliding her fingers along my cheek. ‘You should tell her to ask Blake out.’
Her hand fell away from me, and I craved her touch instantly. Raking my fingers through her hair, I stopped at the base of her neck, tilting her head so her lips were closer to mine.
‘Lillian is a grown woman. She can do whatever she likes. She doesn’t need me to tell her what to do.’
Lucy’s gaze flicked to my lips. ‘But she values your opinion so much.’
I couldn’t concentrate on our conversation. Not when Lucy’s mouth was so close to mine.
She pushed up onto her toes, inviting me to kiss her.
Outside the laundry, Lillian and Gabby laughed, and Mum argued with Charlie, trying to make him eat more food. My heart drummed. I stared at Lucy’s waiting lips, hungry and desperate, torn between wanting another taste and not wanting to get caught.
I had every intention of telling everyone, but I didn’t want them finding out like this.
I edged back, and her face creased with disappointment.
‘We better head back,’ I said. ‘You go out first. I don’t want them seeing us walk outta here together.’
She nodded, then left. Uneasiness stirred in my gut. Something wasn’t right with her today.
Gabby was smoothing down Lucy’s hair when I walked into the kitchen.
‘Why you go black when you have blond hair?’ she asked Lucy.
I cringed. I loved Gabby, but she had no filter.
Lucy offered her a genuine smile. ‘Something different, I guess.’
Mum dusted off her hands with her apron, then joined Gabby beside Lucy. ‘Don’t you worry, Lucy,’ Mum said. ‘Soon, the black will grow out.’
They doted on her, patting her hair down like she was a damn puppy, and Lucy just stood still and took it. I knew Mum and Gabs—this was their way of showing they cared, of letting Lucy know someone in this big, bad world had her back. But I also knew Lucy. And this kind of attention would be killing her.
Lillian pierced me with a death stare from the other side of the kitchen. Sighing, I cut between Mum and Gabby. ‘Okay, ladies. Lucy and I need to go home.’
Gabby’s eyes bulged. ‘But has Lucy eaten?’
Lucy bit her lip, secretly pleading with me to lie.
‘Yep. Lots,’ I said.
Mum cupped Lucy’s cheeks and gave her a full smile. ‘I’m so happy you come today. I keep asking Billy, every week, “Bring Lucy. Bring Lucy.” And every week he tell me you don’t want to come because you’re busy. But I’m happy you come today.’
Fuck.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
Lucy glared at me with glassy eyes, her shoulders crumpling like I’d speared her straight through the chest. Taking her hand, I hurried to the front door, not bothering with goodbyes and ignoring Mum’s pleas to pack a plate of food to bring home.
I jumped in my car and turned the ignition. Lucy sat in the passenger seat, her hands tucked in her lap, staring out the windscreen.
I flicked her a glance. ‘Listen, about what my mum—’
‘Please, don’t speak to me right now.’
Her words hardly reached me, and yet they could have shattered glass.
My stomach sank.
‘Lucy—’
‘Please. Just don’t,’ she whispered.
I clenched the steering wheel, my knuckles taut and white. It was only a ten-minute drive home, and yet the tension made it feel like an eternity.
Her breathing grew more labored with every passing moment. By the time I pulled into the driveway, she was close to gasping. I killed the ignition and turned to her, but she’d leaped from the car before I could say anything.
I un
locked the front door. She pushed ahead of me and stormed into her room. I stood against her bedroom door, watching her scramble between the bathroom and the closet as though she were looking for something.
‘Can you just calm down a minute?’
She wouldn’t listen. Her entire body trembled, every breath loud and rapid as she gathered her drawings.
I realized then what she was doing.
Stepping into the room, I tried to grab her hand. ‘You really need to calm down and hear me out.’
Tears glazed her eyes. She refused to look at me, darting around the room, and stuffing things into a small plastic bag. She struggled with every breath, and I desperately needed to calm her. But her resolute expression told me she wouldn’t stop.
‘Fuck, Lucy! Will you just listen to me! You’re really overreacting right now.’
‘I thought for a small tiny second that I mattered to you. Thank you for reminding me that I don’t matter to anybody.’
She pushed past me to the front door, and panic stopped my heart. I couldn’t let her go anywhere when she was breathing like that.
I clutched her arm. ‘Where are you going? You have no money and nowhere to stay!’
She stared me dead in the eyes. ‘I’d prefer to sleep in a fucking dumpster than spend another night with you.’
I rose my voice in frustration. ‘I only said that to Mum because Lillian told me to!’
Her forehead creased, and I stepped closer. ‘Lillian was worried about overwhelming you, about everyone being in your face the way Gabby was today. So I told Mum you were too busy to visit to keep her off my back about bringing you over.’
It happened in a second.
The bag slipped from her fingers, and she clasped her hand to her chest. Every gasp became an urgent grab for air. Adrenaline surged through my veins, and my heart pounded. I clutched her shoulders, feeling her weight crumble beneath me.
I said it over and over again. ‘Just breathe, Lucy. Just breathe.’
She collapsed against my chest. I wrapped one arm around her and yanked my phone out of my pocket with the other, ready to call an ambulance. By some absolute miracle, her gasping eased into heavy breathing. I held her up, my hand against her back, feeling her breathing gradually slow.
‘I’m so tired,’ she whispered, her words weak and airy.
She stumbled away from me, toward her bedroom, but I gently pulled her back. ‘You’re sleeping in my room tonight.’
It wasn’t even dinner time, but I helped her out of her jeans and tank and tucked her into my bed. We lay on our sides, staring at each other. The adrenaline that had surged through me still hadn’t settled, and my heart drummed. Now, I was the one unable to catch my breath.
‘Do you think it’s fair you don’t tell me what’s happening?’ I asked.
‘Was Lillian upset that you took me today?’ she replied, blatantly ignoring me.
I nodded. ‘She cracked it at me big time.’
‘Is that why you two disappeared when we first arrived?’
I struggled to hear her faint voice, even though we were right beside each other.
‘Yep. She dragged me into the bedroom, and we argued about it.’
‘You two should never argue over me.’
I caressed her face, grinning. ‘Lillian and I argue all the time, about everything. But we get over it.’
‘I got really upset with you earlier. I think I may have overreacted.’
‘No shit.’ I laughed.
She smiled. ‘Your mum and Gabby were all over me.’
‘Yeah. They’re like that. Personal space means nothing.’
Her face fell serious, and her smile disappeared. ‘Can you please tell me about Jade? I can’t explain why it’s important that I know who she is or what happened to her. But it is.’
I sighed, then gave in. ‘Jade was someone Lillian had worked with for a while. Her stepdad …’ I stopped, unable to say it, decided not to say it.
‘She ended up in hospital one time, real messed up,’ I said instead. ‘Lillian had been trying to find somewhere permanent and safe for her to stay. But she couldn’t, and Jade ended up back home with her mum and stepdad. That night …’
I couldn’t get the words out.
‘That night …?’ Lucy prompted gently.
‘That was her last night. Ever. She was sixteen.’
Lucy didn’t blink. I looked into her stormy-blue eyes, and my stomach sank. Only then, as I retold Jade’s story, I truly understood why Lillian hadn’t let Lucy go.
And, God, was I thankful for that.
I drew in a deep breath and rubbed my forehead hard, still confronted by the memory. ‘It was bad, Lucy. Real bad. Lillian fell into a really dark place after that. Blamed the whole thing on herself. She still hasn’t forgiven herself, and I don’t think she ever will. She slipped away from everyone and became so distant. And just when she was in her darkest hour, her fucking husband decided it was all too hard, decided he didn’t want to deal with it anymore. So he left.’
Lucy nodded, her expression distant. ‘How could her husband abandon her so easily?’
I clenched my fist, the thought sending fire raging through my veins. ‘Don’t get me started.’
‘It wasn’t Lillian’s fault,’ Lucy whispered.
‘No. She’d tried so hard to find Jade somewhere safe, but there had only been so much she could do. I hope one day she realizes that.’
‘So I unintentionally backed Lillian into a corner when I left the hospital—when I refused to go to a shelter. And now you two are arguing because of me.’
I planted a kiss on her temple. ‘Don’t worry ’bout that.’
Lucy gave me a small smile. ‘Gabby wants to set you up with someone.’
I rolled my eyes. ‘She told you ’bout that?’
‘Apparently, this woman will take care of you. Will you go to the café and meet her?’
I edged closer and cupped her face in my palms, staring into her tired eyes. ‘Why the hell are you asking me that?’
She didn’t respond.
Closing the gap between us, I kissed her. Her tender lips barely touched mine, and still, electricity jolted through me. I wanted to squeeze her against me, to hold her—to protect her from everything and anything that could hurt her.
To keep her with me for as long as I could.
Her voice trembled. ‘I have to tell you something, Billy.’
‘Is it about your breathing?’
She shook her head, her eyes drooping with exhaustion.
I kissed her forehead. ‘Tell me in the morning. Just sleep now.’
Her eyes shut as if she couldn’t physically keep them open anymore. As if she was relieved I’d given her permission to rest.
‘But it’s so important.’ She mumbled into the pillow, hardly audible, almost asleep.
I kissed the crown of her head and brushed her hair clear from her face. Reaching behind me, I felt for my phone on the bedside table, then typed my message to Lillian.
Whatever is wrong with Lucy is now urgent. Swing by in the morning. You need to take her to see a doctor asap. I’d do it myself but I know you’d prefer to. She isn’t telling me anything. She won’t let me help her. It’s like she wants to …
My jaw dropped. I stopped typing my message and stared at my words as a bone-chilling realization occurred to me. Turning, I stared at Lucy’s ghostly pale skin.
I returned to work in three days.
Lucy had always said she’d be gone by the time I returned to work.
My mouth dried. I couldn’t swallow the lump in my throat. Resting my head gently onto hers, I whispered in her ear, begging her to hear me. ‘Don’t go anywhere, Lucy.’
I finished my message to Lillian.
Please, just make sure you’re here in the morning.
I put my phone on silent and watched Lucy sleep, unwilling to take my eyes off her, petrified she’d slip away if I did.
Light beat against my bedroom
window, and I flung my eyes open. I swung around, exhaling in relief when I saw Lucy wide awake.
‘Are you always this edgy when you wake up?’ She smiled at me, her eyes their usual vivid blue.
I could wake to her smile every morning.
‘I didn’t sleep too well,’ I said.
‘I feel like I’ve been asleep for days.’
‘You went to bed pretty early.’
Awareness flickered across her face, and her smile disappeared. She nestled into me, gliding her hands across my bare back and planting kisses into the crease of my neck.
‘Can I please have you one more time?’
I didn’t want to ask what she meant by that.
Tilting her head back, I locked my gaze with hers. ‘You can have me a million more times.’
Tears glazed her eyes. I pressed my lips to hers and felt them quiver. She opened her legs, and I slid between them, kissing her with silent urgency. Emotion surged through me like jolts of electricity too powerful to contain, but I caressed her with the tenderness I knew she needed.
I slid her undies to the side and slipped inside her. I removed her tank and my tongue found her delicious, pink nipples. Her soft cries made me wild, but still, I moved in and out of her with long, deliberate thrusts.
She clutched on to my back, pulling me into her, holding me like she was scared to let me go.
‘Tell me this means something. Please, Billy. Even if it’s a lie, just tell me this means something to you.’
I looked into her tear-filled eyes, my heart about to combust. ‘I don’t need to lie, Lucy. You do mean something to me.’
A tear rolled down her cheek. I kissed the side of her eye, tasting its saltiness against my lips.
‘What’s wrong?’ I whispered.
‘I just need to feel you one last time.’
Squeezing my waist, she pressed me harder against her and pushed her pelvis up. She arched her back, thrusting her perfectly round tits in the air. I sucked one into my mouth, and her whimpers quickened into sharp cries. Her pussy tightened against my dick, and I inhaled a sharp breath, holding off from coming until she did.
Sweat-drenched and burning, I collapsed beside her and wrapped her in my arms. She nestled into me, and I kissed the crown of her head.
That’s when I saw Lillian.
Call me Lucy: An Enemies to Lovers romance Page 17
