by S. L. Scott
Seeing those sky-blue eyes on me again gives me a strength that was starting to weaken. It’s such a personal question to ask in the middle of a public setting, but I get it. It’s safe here. No matter how personal we get verbally, physically we’re still countries apart. I say, “The morning you left plays on repeat in my head. Every day. All day long.” While I slept the air has become stale—her scent fading too fast—the warmth she brought gone, leaving the room cold. I pull the covers down and finally face reality. Ally Edwards is gone.
“Hutton . . .” Her head falls forward as her pain sneaks out, and her eyes dip closed. “I’m sorry.”
“Look at me.” When she does, I say, “You don’t have to apologize for hiding this side of your life. I just wish you wouldn’t have let me fall so far, knowing you were leaving.”
“I was selfish. With you, I was selfish.”
Honesty is seen in her eyes and heard in her tone, but we shouldn’t get this heavy when we’ve been drinking, so I rub her leg. Tears sparkle in her eyes, tempting me to kiss her pain away. “Why are you crying? This is what you wanted, right?”
Her hand slips under mine, and our fingers fold together. “Because I still . . . love you. I don’t know how to turn that off, but I can’t have you and Brudenbourg. I want my cake and to be able to eat it too.”
I could crack a joke about that, but this is the most real we’ve been with each other since she left, so I hold the jokes and hold her to the fire. “Why can’t you?”
“Because no one can know about us.”
“What’s the big deal? Will your parents not approve?” I can’t believe I just asked that as if I’m a fucking teenager. At thirty-one, I never thought parent approval would be an obstacle keeping me from the woman I love.
There’s not enough time to tell her how empty my life has been without her—not being able to text her during the day, the loss of our long-distance calls at night, the weekends she used to fill now so lonely. With this trip soon coming to an end, I can’t waste the time we do have together.
I decide to spill my feelings onto the splintering wood table before us. “It doesn’t matter what I say, you have an automatic response. This situation, like us, is unique. I hear what you keep telling me. I understand you want to be queen one day. That’s incredible. So much so that I can’t even wrap my head around your reality. But here’s the thing. I don’t have to wrap my head around it. I just have to support you and what you want, but where does that leave me and what I want?”
With her guard down, I can see the sympathy in her eyes. “What do you want, Hutton?”
“It’s simple. I want to be with you. Again.” I put my hand up to stop her from repeating her canned response. “I know we can’t be, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want it, that I don’t want you. I guess I’m a fool for feeling so much for you all this time when you had already closed off the option for us.”
I’m not sure what this woman has done to me. I suddenly sound as pathetic as I feel. Fuck this. I start to stand, but her hand tightens around mine, her plea creating a line between her brows I’ve never seen. “Hutton, please.” I sit back down and wait to hear what she has to say as if I’ve waited my whole life. She says, “It’s not been like that at all for me. I’ve cried myself to sleep every night we’ve been apart. It’s a reality I struggle to accept. You once asked me why I didn’t show up for our weekend in Houston.”
That she’s still holding on to me so tightly makes me want to give her this chance to cleanse her soul of the sins she needs to free.
“If I had come—”
The cracking of wood ends the conversation abruptly. A chair is broken when two dudes start throwing punches. I jump up and lift Ally to her feet, standing to protect her from the chaos. “This way.” I wrap myself around her, covering her from the flying glasses and anything else being thrown as the entire pub joins in the fight. When we reach the far wall, I use my body as a shield until we reach the door and I can get her out of here.
The quiet street and late hour stand in stark contrast to the bright light streaming through the open door as we hurry to a doorway and hide in the shadows. I press her against it, using my body to protect her from harm.
“You’re my hero.” Her arms come around my middle, and she holds me from behind. She feels so good.
“Not a hero.”
“You are to me.”
“Where do we go?” I ask, turning around when it seems we’re at a safe distance from the fighting.
She remains wrapped around me but now has her cheek against my chest. “Back six months, so I can tell you how I feel about you sooner.” Looking up into my eyes, she says, “When I said I love you, I meant it. But—”
“But when you said you can’t be with me, you meant that too.”
Ally nods, her gorgeous face grief-stricken under the confirmation. I hate seeing her in pain, especially if I’m the cause of it even if it is at my expense. Caressing her soft cheek, I say, “We don’t have a future, but we have tonight.”
“Do we?”
“That’s up to you, princess.”
Her arms tighten around me. All the signs I used to notice when I knew she wanted more than she was getting, more than she could voice she wanted, are bubbling to the surface.
Heavier breath, causing her chest to push against mine.
Lips licked and bitten with such an innocence that we never were.
Pupils widening, the lighter blue being taken over by darker thoughts.
Hands that slide under my clothes without hesitation, journeying to their final destination without a road map.
“If you’re offering . . .” she starts. Words are spoken standing on the cliffs of breathlessness. “I want tonight.”
My lips are on hers like time will turn to ash if I don’t. If our relationship is doomed to go up in flames, we might as well be the ones who start the fire. There’s no slow when it comes to us. We were never into foreplay because we’d rather fuck instead.
We were flames to ashes in a flash.
My jeans constrain my cock, which is hard as a fucking rock. Holding this woman again, kissing her, thinking about the possibility of being with her again doesn’t just sober me, but energizes every part of my body.
I press my body to hers in the corner of this closed shoe shop. Her fingers tangle into my hair, pulling me closer. Keeping her mouth against mine, she whispers, “I want you so much. I missed this connection, your touch, the feel of your body controlling mine.”
Control.
Her body is mine to play, to tweak, to bend to my will and elicit the perfect pitch of an orgasm. She’s my playground, my fever, my every wild day tamed from my lion ways. I don’t pace the cage when she’s near. Bars can’t keep us apart, only her obligations.
Closing my eyes, I take in her soft floral scent as I kiss the delicate curve of her neck. Her lips at my ear urge me for more, her murmurs little kitten purrs. Her hands lower from my back to my ass as one diverts to rub the front of my pants. “Careful,” I warn, my restraint not as strong as the denim of my jeans which is currently cutting off circulation.
“Or what?” There she is. There’s my spitfire.
I pull back to let the light from the lamp across the street brighten the dark corner we’re in. “Or we’re going to be fucking right here.”
Her eyes are fixed on mine. “Would that be so bad?”
“You’re a very naughty princess.”
Her tongue dips out and wets the corner of her mouth. “I may not want to own it, but I earned my reputation.”
Shaking my head. “I don’t think so, but you’re about to.” I’m about to turn her around and tell her to hold the wall, but Bennett’s obnoxious whistle fills the air. It’s a call into the night we always used to use to find each other in our party days. “We need to go.”
“What? No,” she says, desperation manipulating her fingers to fist my shirt and hold me in place.
A chuckle escapes, echoing al
ong with the sirens arriving on the scene down the street. I take her hand and kiss her wrist. “We’re going to leave, but I’m not leaving you tonight.” I run my hand into her hair and hold her head so her eyes stay on mine. “Not until I’ve tasted every part of you, inside and out.”
“We can’t—”
“We can, and we will, because I see how you look at me, how you want me. I feel how you touch me. You gave me no choice before, but now that I’m here, I’m not walking away without a fight, because no matter what I thought you meant in Austin, I’ll never be done with you either,” I reply, dropping to my knees before her. “My princess.”
14
Hutton
With every fiber of my being, I was absolutely sure of one thing. I was not walking away. Ally means everything to me. But before telling her I’d accept us living in two different cities, two countries worlds away, if that means we can see each other fairly regularly, I need to take inventory of the situation.
I’ll start by finding out what’s under that little skirt of hers. The tease.
Sitting in the back of the SUV, I ask, “You dressed like that for someone else?”
“I dressed in what made me feel like me again.”
“You look like the woman I know.”
“I feel like Ally, and I haven’t felt like her in a long time.”
I run my hand over her bare thigh, teasing just under the hem of her skirt. “You’re gorgeous as ever.”
Her hand covers mine and encourages me to go farther. “Touch me,” she whispers.
With my palm pressed between her thighs, I say, “I am. How far do you want to go?”
“Make me come, Hutton.” Looking at Marielle and Bennett chatting in the middle row and then at Jakob in the passenger seat up front with our driver from the other day, everyone seems occupied. Laughter and stories about the end of the bar fight bring an excitement to the small space.
Ally brings excitement to our small space. I reach a finger out and touch the softness between her legs. She spreads her legs enough to let the largeness of my hand in.
Warm.
Wet.
Welcoming.
I get the answer to my earlier quandary. Her panties aren’t lace to match her bra because she’s not wearing any at all. Fuck.
Leaning toward her, I make sure she gives me her complete attention when I say, “I’m going to make you feel so good, baby.”
“You always did.”
“Remember that, Belle?” Jakob calls from the front. “Crazy night.”
We weren’t listening, so she wings it. “Yeah, crazy night. Hey, turn up the music. I love this song.”
He continues chatting with the driver, continuing a story about his youth. When the music gets louder, I make my move. “Sit back. Just a little and keep your eyes on me. When I say something, I want you to acknowledge me like we’re talking.”
Capturing her hand, I kiss the underside of her wrist.
Surveying the scene ahead while I lower her hand to her lap and bump my hand between her thighs. “Open for me.” I return to that warm place that begs to be touched, to be loved, sucked if I could without being busted, and fucked even if we were.
As I swipe roughly through her soft lips, curls that weren’t there before tickle my fingers. She takes a quiet breath and then releases it, but it comes out as a soft moan. I catch her gaze and silently mouth for her to be quiet.
“I’m going to fuck you with my fingers until you come all over my hand. Does that sound good to you?” I whisper so she can hear me, but the words stay between us, sounding like casual conversation to the rest of the passengers.
“More than good.”
My pride sneaks out, my girl making me smile. She can’t hide her wild side from me just as I can’t hide mine from her. She’s the one that brings it out in me. I toy with her, working her up, and get her wetter until she’s starting to squirm. It’s not the best angle for me, but it’s fucking hot, so I’m not stopping. I can hear how wet she is even over the music.
I could probably fuck her right here, judging by how she’s looking at me. Her lids are heavy, a sex-induced glassy gaze settling in as she leans back to give me more of herself.
She said I disrespected her, but that was nothing compared to what I’m about to do to her. I plunge in, going as deep as I can with one finger. A deliciously sweet moan I would normally steal from her tongue is exhaled, so I quickly cover her mouth and warn, “You must be quiet, Princess, and don’t move. Or do you want them to know their future queen is being finger fucked in the back of this SUV?”
Her eyes snap to mine. “Twenty minutes left, and I haven’t come yet.”
I glance out the window as we pass through another village. The challenge doesn’t intimidate me. I’ve had her on her knees begging for more in less time. Her pussy’s tight, and a caveman sense of ownership grows inside my chest. I slip in another finger and start slower this time, letting her adjust and stretch.
Those sweet ruby lips part, and her eyelids momentarily dip closed. One of her hands starts to grip me over my jeans, but I move it. My dick is solid steel, and that’s going to be hard enough to hide, so I don’t want to add a cum spot that I can’t disguise. Never one to listen, her fingers weave through my hair, her nails scraping lightly over my scalp before she returns it to my leg.
I’m not worried about the time we have left; I just want to get her off to remind her how good we are together. To bring her release. I thrust and swirl, using my thumb to dote on her clit. Her chest heaves, and her mouth hangs open.
She hikes her skirt to her hips and takes my fingers and squeezes before releasing for another round.
“How do I feel inside you again?” A jagged breath replaces an answer I’m going to demand of her even if she struggles to come back down from this high again. “Use your words, Ally.”
“Like you should have never left.” She pushes down, her body begging for more. “God, I’m so close. I need you to go faster.”
“No. I’ve waited too long to rush this. I’m going to enjoy every second.”
“Please, Hutton.”
“Take what you want. Take it, baby. I’ll give it to you. All you have to do is take what you need.”
“I need you.”
Fuck me. I want to kiss her to take all of her like she wants me to, like I need to, but I’m reminded we’re not alone and we’re not supposed to be doing this when Bennett pops open a bottle of beer and looks back. “Want a beer, Hut?”
“No.” My death glare is enough for him to glance at Ally who’s stiff with my fingers still inside her.
He would only have to look down to see everything, but he gets the wordless message. Marielle starts to say something to her sister, but he sidetracks her by touching her hair. She snaps, “What are you doing?” and pulls back, her eyes wide as she stares at him.
“You had a leaf in your hair,” he replies, winging it; something my brother is very good at doing. Their conversation takes the heat off us, and I start moving my hand again.
Within seconds, her hands are holding mine, and her body is clenching around me. Her exhales come as restrained rough breaths, and her body releases the sins she’s kept pent-up. “Hutton,” comes with her body as she closes her eyes.
My heart pounds, and my cock throbs for relief, but I steady my body, staying still while she works her way through a universe of sensations.
When her body begins to loosen, her eyes opening as her tense muscles relax, I slowly pull out and watch as those castle walls she built while we were apart start to crumble. Brick and mortar can’t keep me from invading her heart. Neither can distance nor tradition.
I bring my fingers to my mouth and suck them clean of her nectar. I’m not going down without a fight because the forbidden fruit always tastes the sweetest.
She tugs her skirt down, not giving me the satisfaction of boosting my ego or stroking my pride with a smile of satiation. She doesn’t have to. My ego is not that fragile
, and I don’t need her to tell me what I saw or what I see in her eyes now. The fire between us still burns brightly. Hers needs to be fanned and stoked the right way, so she’ll try to find a way for us to be together.
That’s a job I was made for. Anyway, I told her to take what she needs, and she did. There’s nothing sexier than a woman who knows how to get herself off other than one who gets me off. It’s not my turn right now, but I know she won’t leave me hanging.
Her sister turns around, and says, “How are we sneaking in?”
“The kitchen,” Ally replies flatly.
When Marielle turns back, I watch Ally. I sense her anger as she stares out the window. Trying to bring her back to me, to feeling good again, I touch her hand. “Hey, look at me.” When she does, I say, “You’re amazing.”
“I don’t feel amazing.” Her gaze goes to our hands barely touching between us. “I feel terrible.”
“I’m that good, huh?”
It’s small, but I’ll take the smile she gives me. Looking at me again, she says, “I want to be with you freely, to touch you, and to make you feel like you make me feel.”
“How is that?”
“Like my sins don’t matter.”
“What have you done that’s so bad?”
“Broke the rules. I’ve been paying for it ever since, so I can’t step out of line again. I can’t have a hair out of place. I have to marry who they tell me to. This role is what I’ve been groomed to fill. It’s all I know.”
My hand hasn’t dried from being coated in her pleasure before I’m hit with anger at why we can’t be together again. “So that’s it then? After I just told you how I feel about you, Ally?”
“You can’t call me that . . . if someone overhears—”
“I don’t give a fuck if someone hears.”
“I do.”
The SUV pulls to a stop at the back of the palace. The doors open, and she starts to slide across the same leather I had her squirming on moments ago. I grab the same wrist that I kissed earlier. When she turns back, I say, “You sure didn’t mind when I was fucking you with my fingers five minutes ago.”
