by Lucy Knott
Grandpa went to sit down beside his youngest granddaughter – Amanda’s baby sister, Louisa – on the soft grey couch. Louisa placed a hand on the small of Grandpa’s back, guiding him down, aiding him with his balance as his old knees did their best to bend. Then she scooted up to give him some space and make sure he was comfy.
Amanda made for the little blue chair in front of the fireplace. This had been the girls’ favourite spot to perch when they were kids. In the cold months, they would run in from school, drop their schoolbags at the foot of the stairs and race to the living room, ready to fight for the chair. With their arms outstretched over the flames they would try to capture the heat, as Grandpa shouted, ‘Careful not to roast,’ with a chuckle. They would tell their nonni about their day and what they had been up to while taking it in turns to sit on the chair, indulging in soft, buttery Bauli cakes as crumbs sprinkled the carpet.
Things hadn’t changed much, except these days Amanda had to position herself more carefully in the chair. When she looked up she caught sight of Louisa who was grinning, her brown eyes looking from the chair to Amanda. They weren’t kids any more. The precise movement – a twist of the hips and a gentle shuffle to avoid getting stuck between the armrests – was certainly a sight to behold. She couldn’t help but reciprocate Louisa’s grin. She would not get stuck today; she’d mastered this by now.
‘Grandpa, would you like a biscuit?’ Louisa asked, picking up the tin and offering it to him.
‘Just one?’ he questioned, making both girls laugh. Amanda watched him tuck into his chocolate biscotti. Tears threatened her eyes again as she replayed his ‘thank you’ in her mind. Though Grandpa could be impatient at the best of times, his passion for cooking knew no bounds and it was getting harder for Nanna to help him in the kitchen.
The girls’ mum would often tell him that he couldn’t start whipping up things left and right and then leaving it for Nanna to finish and clean up. Mum would have to explain to him that Nanna was getting old too. This frustrated Grandpa. He would get bossy and occasionally snap when the girls tried to help him.
Today, hearing him say ‘thank you’ after Amanda had helped him mix up the pizza dough and prep it to rise in the oven had melted her heart. Not only because in that moment he seemed to acknowledge his sometimes-bad moods and apologize for them, but also because she couldn’t imagine not being able to cook whenever she wanted. She understood his need to be in the kitchen; after all, he had passed on that same passion to her. She knew how important cooking was to him. His ‘thank you’ had been filled with gratitude – all because of the simple act of being there for him, allowing him to do what he loved.
‘One for Amanda too,’ Nanna said to Louisa, pointing at the gold tin of biscuits on the coffee table. Tins of biscuits were a permanent fixture in the living room. ‘Mangia, mangia,’ Nanna continued, as she turned to look at Amanda.
‘I am, Nanna, I am, look,’ Amanda replied, her nanna’s voice snapping her out of her thoughts. She stood up out of the chair, with a ninja-like swivel of her hips, so they wouldn’t get caught under the tiny armrests, and took a biscuit from the tin. She smiled at her nanna and stuffed the whole thing in her mouth.
‘You’re a cheeky girl,’ Nanna said, with a tut and a shake of her head.
Amanda took another biscuit and bent down to kiss her nanna on the forehead. ‘I love you,’ she said, with a mouthful of amaretti.
‘God bless you,’ Nanna replied, her voice wobbling slightly. ‘Grazie, grazie for helping Grandpa.’
Amanda leant down and kissed the top of her forehead once more, her nanna’s rose scent filling her heart with contentment.
‘What time is it?’ Grandpa asked, squinting through his round glasses, to see the clock above the fireplace better.
‘Nearly time, Grandpa,’ Louisa answered. Both sisters knew all too well why he was asking. Amanda and Louisa’s sister, Sabrina, was due any minute and Grandpa had spent the better part of the morning looking at the clock. It had been a while since he’d had all three of his granddaughters together. His excitement was clear from the sparkle in his eyes.
‘Ahh, I ask you too many times,’ Grandpa said, shrugging his shoulders and placing his hand on top of Louisa’s biscuit-free hand.
‘No, no, it’s OK, Grandpa – we’re excited too. We understand,’ Louisa replied, chewing a crunchy Pirouette thoughtfully.
‘But what more is there for me to think about?’ he continued, turning to face Louisa.
Amanda smiled, knowing this action meant Grandpa was about to impart some wisdom.
‘At my age, what is more important than family? What do I have to think about? To make sure they are fed, me and Nanna have food for them. I must think about you girls being safe. Your mamma, yes, she looks after you and well, yes, your daddy can provide for you, but me and Nanna, we can only do so much. We can help too. We are always thinking like you are our own daughters.’
Her grandpa’s broken English made Amanda’s heart soar. The girls were fluent in Italian, but they often alternated between the two languages when speaking with their nonni. It helped them all: the girls to keep their Italian fresh and their nonni to understand English better for when they needed to speak with English family and friends.
At that moment, the doorbell rang. Both girls looked at each other with Cheshire-cat-like grins. Louisa sprang up from her seat. Amanda stood up, less frantic. Both Nanna and Grandpa sat upright, their eyes shining like they had just won the lottery.
‘She’s here,’ squealed Louisa, gently shoving Amanda out of the way and racing to the door. ‘I’ll get it.’
Amanda merely chuckled and walked behind, allowing her little sister to take the lead. Louisa often got angry with Sabrina for moving away to LA and leaving everyone behind, but it never changed how excited she got when Sabrina came home. Amanda, on the other hand, was a little more reserved. She was pleased her sister had followed her dreams and over the moon that Dan and his band were in good hands, but there remained a part of her that stubbornly missed Sabrina and was mad with her for being so far away too.
‘The eagle has landed,’ Mum reported as she came through the front door first, arms loaded with birthday balloons and cards, having just picked up ‘the eagle’ from the airport. ‘Safe and sound – she’s home,’ Mum said. Her eyes shone as she kissed Amanda and Louisa, as they passed each other in the corridor. Mum continued to the living room to say hello to her parents, as Amanda walked leisurely outside, and Louisa practically flew.
Like a local celebrity, Sabrina, the middle child, was standing in the middle of the path, between the cherry trees and the fence. Her sandy blonde hair was blowing in the breeze and she had clearly picked up an LA tan. Amanda noticed her bronzed skin glowing under the soft British sun, as Sabrina waved and said hi to the neighbours.
‘All right, Jennifer Lawrence, it’s only been an entire year – we all haven’t missed you that much,’ Amanda shouted into the street, from her position leaning casually against the doorframe.
Sabrina turned to face them at the same time Louisa leapt outside and nearly bowled her sister over with a hug.
‘I’ve missed you, Brina,’ Louisa said, sweetly, as Sabrina gasped for air, Louisa’s hug choking her. Amanda looked on in amusement.
‘I’ve missed you too, Lou. It’s good to see you. It feels good to breathe in this British air.’ Sabrina took a big breath in, as Louisa let her go, and then she let out a deep sigh. Amanda knew she loved parts of her life in LA, but it comforted her to know that it hadn’t stolen her sister just yet. Watching her hazel eyes soften as she took in the surroundings, she could tell Sabrina was happy to be back and that nothing compared to home.
‘You look exhausted. So, what presents did you bring back?’ Amanda asked, leaving her position by the front door and wandering over to join the party.
‘Always so kind with the compliments, aren’t we? I might have gifts for you, but I’ll be needing a hug first,’ Sabrina said, and wav
ed her arms in the air, dramatically motioning for a hug, while giving her big sister her best puppy dog impression.
‘That we are, and it better be an awesome gift. I can’t just be giving away free hugs,’ Amanda said, rolling her eyes and stepping forward to hug her sister.
‘Come on, Brina, Nanna and Grandpa are so excited to see you. You know what Grandpa’s like – he hasn’t stopped asking about you all day. Plus, we’ve held off with the birthday celebrations till you got here,’ Louisa said, grabbing her sister by the arm and pulling her towards the house. Amanda strolled calmly behind them. Though she didn’t quite display her emotions on her sleeve like Louisa did, there was no hiding the bright smile that was now etched on Amanda’s face.
***
The dining room was full of colour. Red, green and white balloons were bunched up – dangling from the doorframes and curtains – and wrapping paper had been strewn across the table, as had bags of pasta and vibrant Italian cake boxes.
Sabrina’s eyes drifted round the table. She took in everyone’s features, everyone’s movements: her mother’s chocolate eyes sparkled with pure delight; Dad had his hands resting on his stomach as he leant back in his chair, stuffed and happy from all the food; Grandpa’s eyes twinkled; Nanna’s smile reached all the way to her ears, making her look twenty-one and carefree again; Amanda’s green eyes focused intently on the food in front of her and Louisa simply watched her grandpa, making sure he had everything he needed.
Everyone talked over one another, laughing uncontrollably in between devouring each piece of pizza quicker than the speed of light. In that moment, she felt content, like there truly was no place on earth she would rather be. All the stress and drama of work melted away like the mouth-watering mozzarella she was chewing; it was heaven on earth.
‘Grandpa, I sure have missed this,’ she said, holding her piece of pizza in the air, like it was a trophy.
‘You can get pizza in America, no?’ Grandpa replied with a cheeky grin.
‘Ha, you know as well as I do, Grandpa, that no pizza on the planet tastes as good as this. No one will ever be able to make it taste as amazing as you do,’ Amanda said.
Sabrina loved the passion her sister had for their grandpa’s food. It made her laugh hearing Amanda’s voice rise with pride when talking about his pizza.
‘It’s crisp, yet chewy, with the perfect amount of crunch, and it’s as light as air,’ her big sister continued.
Sabrina watched as Grandpa’s gaze met Amanda’s and he gave her a small wink. They were like two peas in a pod.
‘Hear, hear,’ Sabrina chanted, raising her wineglass now that her pizza had been demolished. She felt dizzy on love and Lambrusco, but her eyes threatened to roll back in her head. Amanda had been right: she not only looked exhausted, she absolutely felt it too. Her bones were heavy, her neck tight. She rolled her head from side to side, hoping it would loosen up.
‘It’s good to have you home, sweetheart,’ Dad said, raising his glass and clinking it against hers.
‘It feels great to be home, Dad.’ Sabrina smiled softly. It really did feel wonderful to be home. Her shoulders relaxed at the thought of not having to deal with her wouldn’t go amiss in a Disney villain line-up, Cruella de Vil of a boss, Lydia, for the next few days.
The warmth of the room and the bubbles from the Lambrusco made her feel a world away from LA. Tonight she was surrounded by the people she loved more than she could say, and who genuinely loved and cared for her. ‘Buon compleanno, Grandpa,’ she shouted, raising her glass to the room once more. Seeing her grandpa’s face light up would keep jet lag at bay for a while longer.
‘Mamma mia, grazie, grazie. How many girls have I got here now?’ Grandpa said. His voice filled the small dining room, his happiness radiating to each of them.
‘Buon compleanno,’ Nanna shouted, clapping her hands together. ‘Louisa, get the pandoro. Come on, come on.’ Nanna too was thrilled to have all her girls round the table together. Any time this happened was cause for cake and celebrations, but when it came to birthdays and special times like Christmas, Nanna looked like a child, her face etched with glee. She looked to her husband and whispered, ‘Buon compleanno, my dear,’ before cutting a huge slice of pandoro and placing it in front of him. She then went back to cutting more big chunks of cake and passed everyone a piece. ‘Be happy, happy,’ Nanna continued. ‘Ahh grazie, God.’
Sabrina wasn’t sure her stomach could handle the mountain of pandoro in front of her, after eating so much pizza and drinking a fair bit of wine, in addition to jet lag that had now kicked in, but it smelt so buttery and delicious and Nanna was staring at her expectantly. Not eating it was not an option – it was never an option. Plus, she was only in town for a week. She had to eat all her favourites while she could get them, and it was Grandpa’s ninety-sixth birthday after all.
With these thoughts sloshing round her brain, she laughed to herself and took a huge bite. No sooner had the vanilla flavour hit her taste buds than her slice had gone. So much for not having any room left.
‘Grazie, Nanna,’ she whispered, with a chuckle.
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Dear Reader,
I’m having a pinch me moment wondering how I got here; here to my third book. It’s still incredibly surreal to me, a dream come true. Did you see that I have an ‘Also by Lucy Knott’ section now? Eeek, I can’t stop grinning while shaking my head in disbelief.
I absolutely adore writing and can’t thank you enough for picking up my book and giving it a read. I sincerely hope you enjoyed Harper’s story. If any of you, like Harper, have been going through a rough time – maybe struggling with your own plot twist – please know that you have the strength within you to re-write your own destiny. Please reach out to family or friends or anyone that you feel you can talk to, (there are places like @PennineCareNHS on twitter that can also be a great help) to help you make sense of it or get through it. May I also suggest you pick up a pen and write? Writing can be a wonderful helper and healer.
Thank you again for giving me and my book a chance.
All my love,
Lucy xx
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