Chapter Seventy-Four
Gardner sat facing Abby and Simon. He wished he’d come up with something before arriving, so he’d at least be prepared instead of sitting looking at them, their faces growing more and more concerned with every second.
‘What is it?’ Abby asked. ‘What’s happened?’
Gardner cleared his throat. He remembered the day he’d arrived to tell her and Paul that the body of a baby had been found. That had seemed so much easier. Or maybe that was just hindsight. He’d probably sat there trying to rehearse his words just the same. He recalled the sadness he’d felt when he’d first been informed, the bitter disappointment that the case had ended that way, with the death of Beth Henshaw. But as the details had come in he’d felt a rising hope that it wasn’t Beth at all, that there was still a chance she’d be found. The fact it meant it was a different baby, another mother’s child that was dead, didn’t weigh too heavily. It was always someone’s child, someone’s parent, someone’s friend. There would always be victims and they always had someone who cared for them. It was sad, yes, but if he was going to do his job he had to keep a distance from these things and if he had to feel then it was better to restrict it to his own cases.
He remembered Paul answering the door, asking what was wrong, refusing to get Abby. Paul had reacted exactly how you’d expect a father to react after being told his daughter could be dead. Except he wasn’t a father. And he already knew Beth wasn’t dead. He didn’t want Abby to know about the dead baby. He insisted he would do the DNA test. He was forcing Abby’s hand. Making her admit the truth.
‘Michael, what’s going on?’ Abby said and Gardner let out a breath.
‘I spoke to Sara Walters today, the nanny,’ he said. ‘I wanted to know if she had any idea where Helen could’ve gone. The thought had crossed my mind that she’d have gone to Alan Ridley.’
‘I thought he hated her,’ Simon said. ‘I thought they had nothing to do with each other.’
‘They don’t,’ Gardner said. ‘I asked about Casey’s father. She didn’t know a great deal. He only saw Casey occasionally. What she did know was his name,’ he said and Abby sat forward holding her breath. ‘She said he was called Paul,’ he said and he saw Abby stiffen. ‘I showed her a photo of your ex-husband and she identified him as Casey’s father.’
Abby couldn’t tell if it was her or the room that was spinning but she knew that if it got any faster she’d wake up. She’d had these dreams, or rather these nightmares, before. Gardner would tell her that he’d found Beth but she couldn’t have her back because someone better had her. Or tell her that she’d never had a baby and then lock her into a room and leave her there. Or Simon would come into the bedroom carrying Beth and tell her that he was sorry, that she’d been punished enough and that she could finally have her back if she promised to be good. But she always woke up just when she thought she couldn’t take it anymore.
But this time she didn’t. She could hear Simon’s voice but she couldn’t make out the words. He sounded angry and was standing, his arms waving around. But in front of her Gardner was still sitting, watching her, looking concerned.
‘Abby?’ he said and she tried to focus on his face. She’d never noticed before that he had green eyes. Or maybe she had. She couldn’t remember. ‘Abby?’ he said again.
She stared at him and tried to understand what and why and how. Her hands shook as her thoughts fought with each other, trying to push their way to the front of her mind. There had to be an explanation. Maybe Paul had just met Helen and the nanny was confused. Or she’d been completely wrong and it wasn’t Paul at all. It must’ve been a different Paul, there are lots of Pauls.
She could hear her heartbeat so she closed her eyes and concentrated on it, trying to amplify it and make it drown out the thought that Paul was guilty. There had to be another explanation.
Gardner’s hand on her shoulder made her jump. ‘Abby?’ he said.
Unable to speak, she turned to Simon. He was quiet now, standing there with his hands linked on top of his head. He was staring at her too. He was waiting for an explanation from her, they both were. Maybe she was supposed to have known all along that it was her husband who’d betrayed her, who’d torn her life apart. Or she was supposed to be coming up with an excuse for him, defending the man she knew could never do something like this. But she still couldn’t speak. She opened her mouth to try just in time for the vomit to hit the carpet.
Kneeling on the floor she could see their feet rushing towards her. Abby wiped her mouth and turned to Gardner. ‘Is it true?’ she asked.
Gardner bowed his head. ‘Sara identified him-’
‘She could be lying,’ Abby said. ‘Helen could’ve told her to say that. She could be trying to fuck with me some more.’
‘We don’t know anything for sure yet but I don’t believe she was lying. I don’t think she knew anything about what was really going on.’
‘You didn’t believe that she was my daughter either,’ Abby said and saw Gardner wince at her words. ‘She could be lying, trying to make him look guilty when he’s not.’
‘Are you sure he’s not?’ Simon said and they both looked up at him.
‘What?’ Abby said.
‘Are you sure he’s not guilty? Are you positive he wouldn’t do this?’ Simon said.
‘Of course he wouldn’t,’ Abby said. ‘He wouldn’t,’ she muttered and looked at Gardner for confirmation.
‘Look, we don’t know anything for certain yet but Sara claimed that she saw the photographs of Paul with Helen and Casey. Helen was cutting him out of them. I’m getting an address for Paul,’ Gardner said. ‘We’ll find him and get to the bottom of this.’
‘I think we’re already at the bottom of it,’ Simon said.
Abby closed her eyes and pictured Paul in her mind. He was a good person. This was all wrong. ‘We need to find him,’ Abby said, opening her eyes. ‘We need to know why the nanny thought it was him.’ When Simon shook his head Abby spoke again. ‘Simon, we need to find-’
‘I know why she said it was him!’ Simon said and slammed his fist into the wall. Abby recoiled as he raised his fist for the second time. Abby reached over for him but Simon pulled away.
‘Simon...’ Abby tried through her tears, ‘maybe she’s confused.’
‘What? You think she found the picture of him in a photo frame she bought from fucking Woolworths?
‘Simon, please.’
‘Wake up,’ Simon said. ‘He did it. He took Beth away from us. It makes sense. How else would they have known where you’d be that day? How else could they be sure? Because Paul told those fuckers to wait for you there. He told them to-’ Simon stopped and looked at her. She could see the blame in his eyes. Why didn’t you know your husband was capable of this?
‘You’re the one who told her about Beth,’ Abby said. ‘You started this.’
‘No,’ Simon said. ‘He started it. He was so fucking angry at you he wanted to hurt you.’
‘Alright,’ Gardner said. ‘Enough.’ He moved between Abby and Simon. Abby turned away from them both. ‘We don’t know anything yet. We don’t know that he was definitely part of it.’
‘Yeah right,’ Simon said.
‘We don’t know anything,’ Gardner repeated. ‘But blaming each other doesn’t help. We’re going to find Paul and talk to him. Alright? Abby?’
Abby let out a shaky breath and turned back to him, nodding. Gardner looked at Simon. ‘Alright?’ he said, as his phone rang. ‘Gardner.’
Gardner stepped outside to take the call, eager to get some air. ‘You got the address,’ he said as soon as he picked up.
‘Yes,’ sir,’ Lawton said. ‘But there’s something you should know.’
‘What is it?’ Gardner said. Lawton didn’t speak immediately. ‘What?’ he said.
‘What’s going on?’
Lawton sighed. ‘I asked PC Wilson to do it because I was trying to deal with something else.’
‘And?’ Gardner said, feeling his patience running out.
‘And he said that I should ask DC Harrington because he’d heard him mention Paul Henshaw earlier.’
‘Harrington? Why would he be looking for Henshaw?’
Lawton sighed again. ‘Someone asked him to find an address for him. It was off the record, I think.’
‘Who asked?’ Gardner said.
‘I don’t know. He wouldn’t say. But he gave me the address.’
‘Is he there?’
‘Yes, sir.’
‘Put him on.’ Gardner paced up and down until Harrington came on the line. ‘Who asked you for Paul Henshaw’s address?’
‘Look, I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking-’
‘Who was it?’
‘Jen Harvey,’ Harrington said. ‘She was at mine last night, she asked for a favour.’
‘A favour? What the fuck were you thinking?’ Gardner said. ‘Why did she want it?’
‘I don’t know. She said she needed to see him. Said it was important.’
‘So you just handed it out?’ Gardner rubbed at his eyes. ‘We’ll discuss this later. Send me the address.’ He disconnected and walked back inside Abby’s house. ‘Why would Jen Harvey be looking for Paul?’
‘What?’ Simon said. Abby sat there, clearly still dazed.
‘Jen Harvey asked one of my team for Paul’s address. Any idea why?’
Abby shook her head. ‘I don’t know. She thought she saw him here a few days ago. I thought she was lying, causing trouble.’
‘Is she part of this?’ Simon said.
Gardner turned his attention back to Abby, his expression asking her the same question.
Abby started to shake her head. ‘I don’t know,’ she said, her voice barely more than a whisper. ‘She wanted a favour from him, I think. Something to do with a website or her book.’
Gardner saw Simon calling someone. ‘What are you doing?’
Simon turned away, his breathing coming out like a snorting bull. ‘Jen? It’s Simon. I need you to call me back. It’s important.’ He hung up. ‘I’m going.’ He started to walk out of the room. Abby reached for him only for him to shrug her off.
‘Get off me,’ he said.
‘Where’re you going?’
‘I’m going to find out where he is and fucking kill him.’ He pulled away from Abby and opened the door.
‘Simon-’
‘Fuck,’ Gardner said and went after Simon. ‘Hold on,’ he said, reaching out for Simon’s arm but he pushed him away. Gardner stumbled back as he watched Simon climb into the car. Gardner pounded on the window but Simon ignored him, driving away. Gardner called Lawton back. ‘I need you to get someone to Paul Henshaw’s address now. Get onto the locals. I’m on my way to get you, we’re going over there. And find someone to come to Abby Henshaw’s. I want someone with her.’
Chapter Seventy-Five
‘Paul’s not here,’ Helen said and started to close the door but Jen put her foot in the way.
‘I saw him through the window,’ she said. ‘I know he’s in there.’
Helen held onto Casey. ‘What do you want?’
‘I just want to talk to him.’
Helen glanced through the doorway into the kitchen. Paul stood there, frozen like a frightened child. Helen turned back to Jen.
‘He’s not here,’ she said and tried to close the door again.
‘I just want to talk,’ Jen said, her voice rising as Helen tried to shut her out. ‘I know I’m probably the last person you want to see but I saw your website. I thought we could talk about maybe working together.’ She paused. ‘And I know you want to see Abby. We could all get together. Like old times.’
Helen lost her grip on the door and it swung back.
‘I know you were there, Paul. I know you went to see her. So I know you still care. And I’m sure she’d want to see you. I can pass on a message if you like,’ Jen said, craning her neck, trying to see past Helen.
‘He’s not here,’ Helen said and pushed the door shut. She could hear Jen banging on the door. ‘Upstairs,’ she said to Casey. ‘Get your things.’
‘But I want to stay with Daddy.’
‘No, Casey. We’re going,’ Helen said.
‘Ohhh,’ Casey said, dragging out the word before stomping up the stairs.
Helen walked back into the kitchen. Through the window she saw Jen walk away and get into her car.
Helen stared at Paul. ‘I hope you don’t mind me not inviting your friend in. But I’m not really in the mood for guests.’
‘I don’t know why she was here,’ Paul said, swallowing hard. ‘I haven’t seen her in five years.’
‘But you’ve seen your ex-wife.’
‘No, I haven’t.’
‘I should’ve known you’d break. That you’d go running back.’
‘You’re the one who went back there,’ Paul said. ‘If you were so concerned with someone seeing you, that Abby might see you, why did you go back to Redcar in the first place? You could’ve stayed away. But you can’t help yourself, can you? It was like that from the start. You couldn’t even stay away from the doctor’s. What kind of fucking psychopath goes and sits there in front of cameras, knowing it’s the first place the police will look? You could’ve stayed hidden but it wasn’t enough, was it? You have to play your mind games, don’t you? Was it to keep me away from Casey? Or just to make me sweat? Because, I don’t know about you, but there hasn’t been a day since it happened that I haven’t expected someone to find out. That someone will come and knock on the door and that’ll be it. Game over.’
Helen shook her head, ignoring his words. ‘You couldn’t do it, could you? Not face to face. You don’t have the guts. You never did. Plenty of ideas but never the courage to actually follow through. So what? You put a note through her door? Anonymous phone call? What else do cowards do?’
Paul shook his head. ‘Helen...’
‘Why would you do that? Why would you destroy your own family?’
‘Family?’ Paul said. ‘You think we’re family now? You used me. You manipulated me, turned me against my own wife.’
‘Manipulated?’ Helen laughed. ‘I told you the truth. I told you she was sleeping with Simon Abbott. I told you her baby wasn’t yours. I told you she’d be better off with us.’
‘And how did you know all that, Helen? How come you just stumbled across it all? You knew what you were doing from the start. You set out to destroy our lives because you wanted Beth.’
‘I wanted you!’ Helen said. ‘I wanted to drive you apart so I started following her. I wanted to find a way to get between you but in the end I didn’t have to. She did that for me. I saw it all, all the secret meetings with him. She was making a fool out of you. They both were. He even told me the baby was his. He was gloating about it like he’d done nothing wrong.’
‘And you just couldn’t wait to tell me about it. Couldn’t wait to put your plan into action while my life was falling apart.’
‘It was all true, wasn’t it? And don’t try and tell me you were forced into anything. You wanted this as much as I did. Whose idea was it to follow her? Who was the one that said we’d have to get her out of the way?’
She could see Paul shaking. ‘And who let things get out of control? Who let those animals do what they did to her?’ he said.
‘I never wanted that to happen. That wasn’t my fault,’ she said. ‘But you knew what you were doing, Paul, let’s not deny that.’
‘No, you knew what you were doing. You saw an opportunity and you took it. I meant nothing to you. I was just a way of getting what you wa
nted.’
‘We were family,’ Helen said.
Paul laughed. ‘Bullshit. As soon as you had Beth you were trying to find ways to get rid of me. You wouldn’t let me near her. You wouldn’t leave me alone with her. You couldn’t get rid of me fast enough.’
‘You were the one who walked away. You were the one who wouldn’t even come near her for months on end. We were supposed to be together. That was the plan.’
‘How could we be together? How could I just walk away from Abby and then start playing house with you? If I hadn’t stayed away, you wouldn’t be here now, you’d be in prison. We both would,’ Paul said. ‘And you knew that. I think that was the idea from the start. You got what you wanted, Helen. You always do. I’m just surprised you stuck around long enough for me to find you at all.’
‘You really think that? I loved you. I did what I did for you. For both of us. I saw what she was doing to you and I saved you. You deserved better. We both deserved more and I got it for us and then you just walked away.’
‘The only reason I still see you is because I’m the only person who has the power to take her away from you. You think I’m weak, but I have the power here. I can take everything away from you.’
‘You are weak,’ Helen said. ‘If you weren’t such a coward you would’ve already gone to the police instead of tip-toeing around your ex-wife.’ She turned to walk away. Paul was a fool. He was pathetic. ‘I have the power here. You might’ve led her to me but I know you’ll never give yourself up. Which means I just walk away and you and your ex-wife will never see me or Casey again.’ Helen started up the stairs. ‘Casey, are you ready to go?’
‘I’ll call the police, Helen,’ Paul shouted after her. ‘You’ll lose another child.’
Helen froze. It felt as if her heart has stopped for a moment and then with every second that passed her breathing quickened. Her throat closed up. She turned around and looked at Paul standing there, phone in hand.
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