by Allie Burton
But it had been him who’d taken the kiss deeper, who caused her to spiral out of control.
He dropped his arms from around her and coldness rushed to greet her, freezing the atmosphere between them. The open doors of the elevator showcased Jay on a gurney with a medical attendant beside him.
“Jay! It’s so good to see you awake. How’re you feeling?” Paul bolted to his brother’s side, agitation displayed in his quick and clipped voice. “Where are you going?”
Jay appeared dazed. His lips loopy. “Mine?”
“Taking him for more x-rays.” The tech didn’t meet her glance.
Her face heated, but not from desire. The medical technician probably believed this might be a love triangle because of Jay’s shocked reaction and claim.
Ignoring her, Paul took hold of his brother’s hand. “I’m so glad you’re awake. I was worried.”
She pushed the button to keep the elevator doors open and stayed inside watching the scene from a distance. Because she was distant. She wasn’t part of this family as he’d pointed out. She didn’t belong. Gripping the side of the elevator, she stopped herself from sinking to the elevator floor. She didn’t belong, but she wanted to. Belong somewhere and with someone.
Belong with Paul.
The walloping continued as if she was being punched by one of her professional boxer clients. She’d never wanted to belong to anyone. What was different about him?
Jay’s gaze didn’t leave her alone though. He surveyed back and forth between the two of them. “What’re you two doing?” His words slurred. “Kissing?”
Chapter Seven
Vivienne approached Jay’s hospital room with caution later that evening. Visiting hours were over, and she wasn’t family. She was trying to avoid family. Which was why she was sneaking in after hours.
Wandering around the quaint main street of Castle Ridge for most of the afternoon, she couldn’t stop thinking about the elevator kiss. Their mouths had said more with actions than words. Something sparked between them even after months of separation and the anger and distrust on his part. She certainly hadn’t stopped thinking of him since their night together, which had made her mad until regret had filtered into her consciousness. Maybe she shouldn’t have turned him down for a date. Lastly, she’d felt ridiculous hoping to bump into him whenever she’d come to town.
And now, she had to deal with a crush from Jay. His slurred words about her belonging to him had shocked to the core. Did Paul realize the drugs must’ve affected his brother’s thinking? Talk about uncomfortable. And awkward. She’d fled the hospital right after, spending the rest of the day away.
She’d had dinner at The Heights at Castle Ridge Lodge. Chef Michael had stopped by to say hi. He’d been too busy to stay and chat. The lodge truly was full. Even the bed and breakfast Luke Logan was opening wasn’t available because there was no heating in the building.
Opening the door a crack, she peeked inside the hospital room. The room was dark, only the blinking from a machine Jay was hooked up to giving any light. No one sat in the chair beside the bed. She let out the breath she didn’t know she’d been holding.
Jay thrashed in the small bed and his eyes flew open. “Miss Tucker.” His grimacing mouth settled into a welcoming smile. His gaze appeared less glassy than this afternoon.
Shifting to get comfortable, she wanted to sound confidant and compassionate. She and Jay needed to discuss many things including what he thought he might feel for her. “Are you too sleepy to talk?”
Struggling, he pushed himself up in the bed. “I’ve been sleeping all day. I’m fine.”
The beeping of the machine settled into a normal rhythm. She didn’t understand what the lines or the beeps meant. Paul would because of his job.
Advancing further into the room, she unbuttoned her coat. “How’re you feeling, Jay?”
He lifted his hand with the I.V. and dropped it back on the bed. “As good as expected. I hate laying around.”
“I completely understand.” She hated being bored or useless, too. Ever since her stints in foster homes she’d needed to prove her worth. Show them she was smart and would work hard. “You’ll need rest to recover.”
“I know, I know.” He whined like a teenager. “My brain wants to jump out of bed and ski down a mountain. My body says otherwise.”
She chuckled. “Normally, I’d say listen to your mind. Not this time.”
Taking off her coat, she placed it on the chair and sat down. Her nerves jittered approaching the first subject. He wasn’t loopy anymore and they needed to have a real conversation. “You understand our relationship is completely professional, right?”
He quirked his head. “Of course.”
While she was flattered a handsome young man might have a crush on her, she needed to nip it in the bud. She twisted her fingers together. “I don’t belong to you, or any of my clients.”
Red crept up his face, across his cheeks, and to his ears. “I didn’t mean anything by that. I just meant you were my agent. Not that you were mine.”
She applauded his forthrightness. “What you saw in the elevator earlier today has no bearing on our professional relationship.”
“What I saw in the elevator?” He scrunched his forehead reminding her of how much he resembled Paul.
“Do you remember seeing me and your brother in the elevator?” Experiencing the best kiss of my life.
It had been familiar and yet, foreign. She’d kissed Paul before, months ago. That night had been about sex and comfort, while this kiss had been about anger and desire.
Different emotions. Different kisses. Same explosive response.
Her heart thudded. What did that mean? The jittering picked up pace and tangled with confusion. Did this connection between them exist no matter the length of time apart or the emotions flowing through them? Including anger and distrust? She rubbed her chest knowing she’d need to pull out the string of thought and follow it to its conclusion at another time.
Jay rubbed a hand across his face. “They had me on a lot of medications. I already told the doc I want the bare minimum. I can handle pain.” He was trying to act tough.
Empathy grew inside her. From Luke’s recover she knew the suffering could become unbearable.
“So you don’t remember when Paul and I arrived at the hospital together?” The elevator doors bursting open to reveal their embrace.
Jay’s cheeks flushed a brighter red. “He was upset, and you were comforting him with a hug, right?”
Not exactly. Maybe the drugs had interfered with his recollection and had caused him to utter the awkward phrase. Still, she needed to make things perfectly clear. “Just so you know, I don’t have personal relationships with clients.”
“I understand.” He shifted on the bed to face her more clearly. “I want you to know, Miss Tucker, I’m going to recover. I’m going to work hard and become a better skier than before. I don’t want you to give up on me.”
His determined tone persuaded, and his blue eyes gleamed with passion. His strong chin tilted with pride. If anyone could do it, he could. She was here to encourage him. His talent was special. He was special. His brother was special, too.
No. Don’t go there.
She was here for Jay. Picking up his hand, she patted it. “I’m not giving up on you.”
In the past, she would’ve come to check on her investment. She’d already sunk time and money into sponsorship opportunities. She approached her clients and the opportunities she could get for them in a cold and detached way. Like a commodity. Things had changed when Luke Logan had been injured and she’d helped him in a personal situation. She’d butted in on his life outside of skiing.
And then she’d helped Michael Marstrand get out of sticky personal situation. And now, she was here to support Jay.
Hmm, maybe it was something about Castle Ridge.
Everyone in town had been friendly this afternoon. From the shopkeeper at this cute designer shop, to the kid
at the ice cream parlor, to the waitress at The Heights. The town had grown on her with each visit and with each person she’d met.
Living in an anonymous city she hadn’t made those kinds of connections. She didn’t have close friends or any family. She’d always thought she was too busy and traveled too much. Were those excuses? She’d always hated the possibility of losing people like she had her parents.
Jay and Paul and the entire Bradford clan had lost their parents and the incident only brought them closer. Maybe she’d approached her personal disaster wrong.
“Why are you here?” Jay’s question brought her back to the current situation. His voice trembled.
The accusation part sounded similar to his brother’s questions and attitude.
Annoyance buzzed. Why did people assume the worst about her? Sure, she was efficient. Did that come off as too cold? “I wanted to see how you were, hear your prognosis, discuss your plan for rehabilitation before I leave tomorrow.”
And see your brother.
The final thought she left unsaid. Didn’t want to acknowledge it to herself.
“That’s not what Paul thinks.”
The buzzing changed into torment, building with hurt. Even if she planned to dump Jay, she wouldn’t do it while he was in the hospital. The hurt became harder and hotter, and billowed into her chest clogging her throat and lungs. She wasn’t a terrible person. Anger thundered beneath her skin. After they’d been caught in the elevator Paul had treated her like clinging scum. She knew he blamed her and believed she’d led his brother on, tricked him into signing the contract.
The source of her anger stepped through the open door. “What’s not what I think?”
* * *
Paul crossed his arms trying to control the instinct to grab Vivienne and yank her out of the room away from his brother. He couldn’t believe she would sneak in after hours to see Jay. Without his guardian present. Without anyone present.
First, she ended the boy’s dreams of skiing professionally by nullifying the contract, and now she was breaking the poor guy’s heart.
Paul’s own heart cracked.
What other reason would Jay have shouted she’s mine when he’d caught them kissing? The boy was in love with his agent. And the big brother was falling for her, too. He couldn’t let his mixed-up emotions threaten his objectivity.
Wearing the same tight sweater, Vivienne stood and took a menacing step toward him. Her beautiful, treacherous face glowed with righteous fury. “You told Jay I was giving up on him? How can you be so cruel?”
Cruel was a woman who had sex with a man and yet turned him down for a date. Cruel was a woman who had sex with one man and kissed another man the next day. Jealousy snuck through the cracks in Paul’s heart making the crevices wider. Except he wouldn’t admit to any of those things. “Cruel is a woman who builds up a young boy’s hopes and then crushes them.”
She pointed a long finger his way. “I’m not crushing anything.” She poked him with the finger, the sharp red nail digging through his shirt. “You are.” She poked harder. “I’m not giving up on Jay and neither should you.”
Paul grabbed her poking finger and wrapped his hand around it, holding her still. He didn’t want to be lectured by a stranger. An intimate stranger. This afternoon’s kiss should’ve sent her running back to Florida. The kiss had conjured desire from their night together and deeper emotions he wasn’t willing to acknowledge. From only a touch of her lips. Why would she kiss him, when she didn’t want to date him? She was only after sex.
“I’m not giving up.” He held onto his own anger. At her. At the situation. So his brother wouldn’t hear, he whispered, “You don’t even know the extent of Jay’s injuries or his prognosis.”
“Why don’t you tell me?”
“That’s not what you came here for tonight?” Paul arched a single accusing brow. “To wheedle it out of him.”
“I don’t wheedle.”
“And you don’t break hearts. Yeah, yeah. I’ve heard it before.” He believed the heartbreak contract had been revoked because his heart was aching.
“Guys?” His brother sounded weary and concerned.
Dammit. He shouldn’t be fighting with her in front of his injured brother. He should be explaining how nothing was going on between him and this woman. He hadn’t gotten the opportunity this afternoon between the x-rays, the doctor coming in to talk about the injuries, and Jay falling back asleep.
He grabbed his head. “Can you argue somewhere else? I’ve got a headache.”
“Should I call the nurse? Do you need anything?” Paul dropped Vivi’s finger and launched himself toward the bed. His first concern was his brother. His only concern should be his brother.
Not this woman.
“No. I think I need to sleep.” Jay yawned, and the action reminded Paul of when he’d been a little kid trying to stay up late, wanting to be a grownup, too.
He needed to protect his brother from too much stress and worry, from this woman and her machinations. “I’ll see Miss Tucker to the door.”
Her lips firmed and pouted. Indignant in his decision to get rid of her.
Good. He was tired of her getting her way.
“Tell her.” Jay’s firm tone contrasted with the fluttering of his eyelids. “Tell her what’s wrong with me and how I’m going to ski again.” His eyes drifted closed and stayed closed.
Now, he looked fourteen, instead of eighteen. Sweet and innocent. Everything inside Paul tenderized. He wasn’t so innocent. The guilt struck him again, banged in his head and reverberated through his soul. He didn’t know what he’d do if his brother couldn’t walk again.
Grabbing Vivi’s arm, he stuffed the guilt into his handling of her. “Let’s go.”
She grabbed her coat and walked out with him. “Are you going to tell me?”
He didn’t want to tell her anything. Except his brother told him to. Maybe if she knew the extent of the injuries she’d leave town.
A flicker of loneliness passed through leaving him cold. “Not here.”
The charged air in the elevator fed his emotions. Anger at her and the world. Guilt. And desire. Always the desire. This is where they’d kissed. He stole a glance at her.
She peeked at the same time and her gaze held a shimmering light as if she was remembering the kiss, too.
He peered away, not wanting to tempt fate.
The elevator doors opened, and he relaxed. Temptation over. He led her through the warren of hallways past the emergency room. Even though it was late, he nodded at coworkers and acquaintances. Hospitals were busy twenty-four hours a day. Too many people at the hospital knew him and his brother. He needed privacy for this conversation.
“Where are we going?” Her voice quivered as if unsure or afraid.
Of him? Maybe fear was a good thing. “My office.”
Reaching his office, he let her go in first and closed the door behind them. It automatically locked. The room was small. Smaller with her in it. She probably noticed the cluttered desk with a computer and lots of messy paperwork, the whiteboard with scheduling information scratched on it, pamphlets shoved into holders on the wall, a single desk chair with the arms tearing from overuse, and a gurney.
He pointed to the chair and she sat. Balancing against the gurney, he wondered where to begin. He understood the medical lingo. In his need to end the discussion quickly he’d keep it simple and brief. No emotion or concerns.
“Torn left anterior cruciate ligament or ACL.” A sharp pain went up Paul’s own leg. His brother would need surgery and months of recovery. “Fractured left fibula and tibia.” His own bones cracked under the pressure. “Small tear in the patella tendon.” It was difficult for him to breathe. “Possibly spinal damage caused by the impact of Jay’s car colliding with the minivan.”
Her face contorted in possible empathy. “Whose fault was the accident?”
Mine. He jerked his head up and scowled. Could she read his mind? She leaned forward in he
r seat, her expression open. She seemed to care about his brother.
He tightened the muscles in his jaw and lied. “There were three cars in the accident. A utility vehicle ran a red light and hit a minivan. The minivan ran into Jay’s car.”
“So not Jay’s fault?”
Mine. Paul gritted his teeth. Why was she pushing the point? He grabbed his hair with both hands. “The utility vehicle driver admitted he hadn’t taken his medication the day of the accident because he couldn’t afford it.”
“The utility vehicle driver admitted fault?”
Fault. Fault. Fault. The word berated him in his head, knocking his thoughts back and forth. If he told Vivi the truth he’d seem weak. And yet, he needed to tell someone, needed to confess his sins.
“Are you okay, Paul?” She must’ve stood because her hand was on his shaking shoulders. “What’s wrong?”
He rocked back and forth and back and forth. The guilt knocked him from one side and then another. He couldn’t hold his culpability in any longer. “It’s my fault. The accident was my fault.”
Chapter Eight
Paul’s confession tore through Vivienne even though it didn’t make sense. His torture was obvious. The pain in his words. His trembling shoulders. The spouting of nonsense.
She wrapped her arms around him and held him close, wanting to comfort him as he’d comforted her that long-ago night. “How could it be your fault? You weren’t in the car.”
“Forget I said anything.” His body stiffened, and he jerked away.
“No.” She grasped his arm and pulled him toward her needing to help him through his anguish. “You need to talk this out with someone. I’m here and a good listener. I’m not one of your sisters and I can keep a confidence.”
He appraised her assessing the truth of what she said. The sharp glint in his blue gaze demonstrated a stubbornness to keep quiet. There was a softening there too, showing he believed her and wanted to trust.
She wanted him to trust her.
“Tell me.” She kept her voice low and clear. No judgement and no plea.
