I push up from the ground and return to standing, ready to take whatever verbal or physical punishment Silas has planned for my most recent act of disobedience. He holds my gaze for a moment, then turns to walk back down the hill without saying a word.
Reluctantly I follow behind him, feeling like I’m being marched to my doom. Not a single interaction is shared at all between us the entire walk through the woods along the stream and back to the truck. The silence and tension remain even after we get in the truck and get back on the road. I’m desperate to know where we’re going but too afraid to ask or do anything that might break this fragile state of uncertainty with Silas right now.
Our destination remains a mystery until I recognize parts of the dirt roads we’re on and see the familiar exterior of the tall wooden fence in the distance, the protective wall that I’ve missed terribly the last couple days. I breathe an immediate sigh of relief as we approach the gate and Silas gets out of the truck to insert the code into the nearby keypad to open it.
As the gate retracts to the side, I’m consumed by momentary panic at the sight of a man crouched next to the garage with a large black rifle pointed directly at us. When he sees the truck, though, he lowers the barrel of the gun and stands up, walking toward us now with a broad grin on his face.
It can only be Joseph. We left the house for this trip before Joseph’s arrival, so I haven’t seen him before or interacted with him yet, other than our one short and awkward conversation over the emergency radio.
The thought of meeting Joseph in person causes goosebumps to break out across my skin. His presence here makes me nervous, and I don’t know why. It’s probably something to do with the fact that he’s still an unknown to me. In some strange way, Silas represents familiarity and safety to me even though he can be unpredictable and temperamental. I have no idea what to expect of Joseph. Silas is fond of him, and he clearly has strong loyalty toward Silas, but that tells me nothing of Joseph’s demeanor or intentions.
I guess I’ll find out soon enough.
Silas shares a similar beaming expression as he walks forward through the open gate to greet his friend halfway up the driveway. Their hands connect before they pull each other in for a brief embrace.
I immediately notice Silas has a few inches in height over Joseph, but they share a similar build, each with broad shoulders and muscular arms. Joseph’s hair isn’t as dark as Silas’ and is a much shorter buzz cut. He carries himself with a similar aura of strength and confidence as Silas, but it’s abundantly clear who’s in charge between the two of them.
They talk together briefly before Silas turns toward me in the truck. I’m worried to see that his jovial expression is gone when he meets my gaze and motions for me to come to him.
Swallowing my unease, I unbuckle my seatbelt and jump down from the truck, closing the door behind me before I cautiously walk up to the two men.
“This is Ash,” Silas announces as Joseph’s eyes meet mine.
Joseph smiles briefly in acknowledgement, but it’s a sad smile. It makes me wonder whether he approves of what Silas has done and continues to do to me, but I’m not sure I’ll ever be given an opportunity to find out.
“Can you do me a favor?” Silas butts in to ask Joseph. “Park the truck and unload the gear for me, and we’ll meet you inside the house?”
Nodding in response, Joseph immediately moves to the truck and gets behind the wheel inside.
At the same time, Silas begins walking toward the front door of the house and calls out behind him without looking at me as he says, “Come with me.”
I follow Silas toward the house, unsure of how glad I am to be home now as he still seems upset with me. When I glance back at Joseph, he’s already pulled the truck forward and is closing the gate now, seeming perfectly happy with carrying out Silas’ request.
By the time I turn around again, I’m within feet of the front door, and Silas is standing there glaring at me. He takes a set of keys out of the pocket in his jeans and unlocks the door before motioning me inside.
As I step into the house, I realize how dark and gloomy it is in here compared to being out in the fresh air and sunshine, but I can’t deny the instant feeling of safety and security that washes over me at being within these walls again, regardless of the horrific memories this place holds for me.
Silas closes the front door and walks toward the bedroom without saying a word. I know he must want me to follow, so I kick off my shoes and rush to catch up with him down the hall until we’re both inside the bedroom. He gradually slows down until he reaches the other side of the room, turning around to face me with a stern expression on his face.
“I want you to show Joseph a good time for me,” he commands.
“Excuse me?” I respond incredulously.
“He deserves a reward for his loyalty and assistance,” Silas continues as if this were a perfectly sound justification for his request. He suddenly narrows his eyes at me, admonishing me with his expression. “You clearly aren’t willing to put out for me, and you’ve proven you can’t do what’s necessary to defend this place.” He steps closer to me, intimidation and power radiating from all aspects of him. “This is the least you can do to show me your loyalty and prove that you still have some use to me.”
I stare at Silas with my mouth agape, my mind having difficulty processing his request. Does he really expect me to pleasure another man as a sign of loyalty to him? I know he’s been angry and disappointed with me today, but is he really giving up on me this easily, convinced that I’m of no other use to him?
Will he kill me if I don’t prove myself by doing this?
“I won’t do it,” I respond with a trembling voice, knowing that it’s the only possible answer I can give. “I won’t be a whore for you.”
“You were more than willing to whore yourself out to that creep in the woods the day I found you,” he retorts.
I won’t let his words affect me. I can’t let him break my resolve on this point. “I won’t do it,” I repeat again, slowly emphasizing each word.
Silas holds my gaze for a few seconds, perhaps clinging to hope that I might change my mind and give in to his request. When my silence makes my previous answer clear, he bows his head and says, “You leave me no choice, then.” He lunges toward me, grabbing my arm as he pushes my torso up hard against the right side of the dresser to both hold me firmly in place and twist my arm awkwardly behind my back so I can’t move. He presses himself up against my back and whispers with spite, “I’ll let Joseph have his way with you instead.”
I scream out as I struggle against him, but I can’t escape his hold of me. The full weight of his body keeps me firmly against the dresser as he manages to open the top drawer and reach deep inside. He pulls out a small syringe with clear liquid inside and a long, thin piece of duct tape hanging off of it, revealing his method of hiding it within the drawer.
The shock of syringe appearing quickly wears off as Silas removes the needle cap with his teeth. Knowing what’s coming only fuels the need to fight within me, and I push back with every bit of strength and leverage I have to try to free myself or knock the syringe out of his hand. My efforts amount to nothing, though, as I feel the needle pierce the skin on my upper arm. The rapid pumping of my heart only serves to circulate the drug faster, and within seconds I feel its familiar effects starting to take over me.
I vaguely hear something from down the hall and struggle to raise my head enough to see over the dresser in that direction. Joseph appears in the entryway, first looking toward the dining room, then turning his gaze toward the bedroom where he is able to get a perfect view of my dire situation. My eyes connect with his, desperate for his help, begging him to stop this, but he makes no move to intervene.
The fight leaves my body as my limbs go limp from the drug. Silas pulls me away from the dresser and lifts me against his chest. I close my eyes even before the unconsciousness consumes me, not willing to give Silas the satisfaction of being
the last person I see before I’m pulled to the darkness.
22
I feel comfort, warmth. There’s something soft against the back of my head and beneath me. With my body completely still, it feels like I’m floating. I like this feeling and want to stay this way, but there’s something bothering me. The tranquility of my current state is sullied by a sharp smell that assaults my nose. It reeks of plastic and glue. It feels like it’s right there beneath my nose and as though I need to swat whatever it is away so that I can get back to enjoying my time floating on this cloud.
My hand moves to investigate and get rid of the horrid smell, but when I try to bring my hand forward, it hardly moves. It’s my appendage, and it should be doing what I want it to; but it’s not, and I’m getting frustrated now. I try with my other hand and get the same result. It’s clearly caught on something. I just need to look at it and get it unstuck and then I can get the smell away from my nose and close my eyes and be content once again.
My eyelids try to move but can’t. There’s some cloth pulled tightly across my eyes and around my head, and suddenly I realize that something’s wrong with this cloud I’m sleeping on and that I need to get away. I pull with all of my appendages now, yanking and thrashing my arms and legs with all of my strength, but they barely move at all.
I try to scream out in desperation, but only a murmured sound escapes. There’s something over my mouth, actually attached to my skin. I feel its stickiness with each movement of my head, and when I remember the pungent smell I was trying to swat away in the first place, it becomes clear to me that duct tape covers my mouth from cheek to cheek.
I gasp as the image of the duct tape attached the hidden syringe comes crashing back into focus within my mind. It’s all flooding back to me now: Silas’ impossible request of me and the consequences of my disobedience.
The adrenaline coursing through my veins has completely overtaken any residual effects from the drug. More fully aware now, I try to calm down enough to understand where I am and what’s happened in the time I’ve been unconscious.
The softness beneath my head and body make it clear I’m lying on the bed. My arms and legs are stretched out to each corner, and based on the cold metal I feel against my skin, I expect my appendages are attached by handcuffs to the bedframe. My legs are bare and open to the air, but I feel something covering me loosely from my chest down just past my waist. I move my upper body slightly to get a feel for it and easily recognize the silky material from the untouched lingerie in the dresser drawer. It’s all I feel against my skin, so I know I’m completely bare underneath it.
As much as I don’t want to think about this part and wish I could just pretend it wasn’t a worry, I know I have to, so I reluctantly bend my knees up and part my legs, trying to gauge what’s been done to me while I was out. I move my lower body a bit, but don’t feel any pain. There’s no sticky feeling there or anywhere else on my body. It doesn’t feel any different, but that doesn’t mean nothing has happened. My body could have been completely ravaged and then cleaned up while I was unconscious, and I’d never know the difference.
A strange feeling of relief washes over me at the thought that it’s already over, but the feeling is short-lived when I hear the faint sound of footsteps approach from down the hall. These aren’t Silas’ heavy and purposeful footsteps, the sound of which is ingrained in my brain from day after day of living with him. These steps are lighter and energetic, eager to get to their destination. They flow continuously into the room as I hear the door swing open and then quickly click shut.
The room is completely silent now except for the foreboding sounds of a zipper opening and pieces of clothing falling to the floor. My breathing quickens as I struggle to remain in the safety of denial for as long as possible, not willing to accept that I’m about to be sexually assaulted to reward another human being.
The moment I feel the mattress compress at the end of the bed, my fragile state of denial shatters, and my arms and legs resume their frantic struggle to break free, even though I know the effort is hopeless. I voice my protests and screams against the duct tape over my mouth, even though I know I’ll never be heard. I fight back with all the strength I have left until I’m suddenly not fighting anymore because I’m too paralyzed with fear by the hand that’s working its way up my inner thigh.
“Shh,” he hushes me softly, and then I feel the imposing weight of his body leaning closer to me as he whispers, “It’ll all be over soon.”
Silent tears wet the fabric over my eyes as I feel fingers parting the lips of my pussy. They waste no time in feeling around and spreading the natural wetness up to my clit, causing an unwelcome flash of heat and pulsing desire to consume my entire body. Another hand lingers under the silk fabric on my stomach, slowly creeping up until it grasps my entire breast, kneading it softly, beckoning my nipple to harden at the intimate touch.
A muffled sob escapes me as I feel fingers probing my opening, swirling my increased wetness around in a tease, threatening to penetrate me. At any moment they’ll force themselves inside me, preparing me for the larger and more demanding part of the male anatomy that is sure to follow. The tease only continues, though, fueling the raging need within me, no matter how hard I try to suppress it.
And then it suddenly stops. Both hands leave my skin, and I’m left panting against the duct tape from my rapid draws of breath brought on by both fear and desire. The mattress compresses some more and then I feel movement at the handcuff on my left wrist just before it lets go. A similar movement at my right wrist follows, and it quickly becomes free as well. Before I can even reach up to grab the objects still covering my face, the duct tape is ripped away from my mouth, and the blindfold is lifted from my eyes.
The moment I see Silas’ face and bare chest above me instead of Joseph’s, I burst into tears that I don’t fully understand. They’re the expression of my terror, but also of my relief. I sit up and throw my arms around him, burying my face into his shoulder as I cling to him and say his name over and over again between sobs. His arms encircle my back and he holds me, encasing me with warmth and safety.
My tears don’t start to subside until I feel something soft and gentle pressed against my neck. He’s kissing me there, a show of affection and support instead of need and desire. There’s nothing selfish or demanding about the way he’s kissing me and holding me. It’s all only for my benefit.
I tilt my head back to give Silas better access, his tender kisses now roaming around the sensitive skin on all accessible surfaces of my neck and shoulder. Each kiss feels like a broken piece of me is being put back in place. It feels right no matter how wrong our situation really is, and I’m sick of trying to convince myself otherwise.
I want to feel whole again. I’m ready to stop this endless freefall.
Pulling back from Silas, I slip my arms out of the thin straps of the maroon chemise I’m wearing. The top of the garment drops effortlessly to my waist, exposing my breasts.
“I want you to catch me,” I whisper breathlessly as I lift my chest toward him, inviting him to continue.
The kisses come faster now as Silas works his lips down my chest and lowers me by my back to the bed at the same time. His lips brush lightly over my breast before quickly finding my nipple, pulling it into his mouth with subtle force. My initial gasp at the move quickly turns into heavy breathing as I try to keep up with the ravenous need being created within me.
His mouth never leaves my breast the entire time he’s working the silk material of the chemise the rest of the way down my body, but when I don’t feel it anymore and am completely bare beneath him, his mouth finally works its way lower. He holds me by my hips as he takes special care to kiss the residual area of bruising around my stomach that has improved, but hasn’t gone away completely from when I was attacked. The tenderness with which he’s treating me floods my body with calming warmth powerful enough to rival the raging lust within me, and the resulting elixir of hormones overtaking
my body only makes me desperate for more.
Silas’ hands slide from my hips down to my thighs at the same time his kisses trend lower. I’m not afraid of the intimate touch this time; I welcome it, pulling up my knees to a bent position and dropping them to the sides to open myself to him completely. His fingers sweep over to my inner thighs when I do this and lightly massage my skin as they move closer to their ultimate destination.
Within seconds his fingers are teasing my pussy again like before, but this time I embrace the rush his touch creates within me instead of trying to fight it. Tiny moans escape my lips as he rubs my wetness up and down in gentle motions over my clit and then back down to my opening. My moans become louder as two fingers venture into me, gradually increasing their depth of penetration until they’re completely lost inside me.
When Silas places his warm lips on my clit and teases it with his tongue, I almost lose it, just barely on the edge of orgasm, but I’m not ready for this to end just yet.
“More,” I breathe out. “Taste more of me.”
Silas removes his fingers from inside me and uses both hands to spread me all the way open before his tongue licks the full length of my pussy, causing my entire body to shudder. My moans turn into uncontrollable gasps of pleasure as he quickens his pace, only stopping to occasionally swirl his tongue in and around my opening, teasing me with the potential of penetration again.
He then focuses his tongue on my clit, and by the time he has two fingers pushed up inside me again, I’m practically bucking my hips in response to his touch. I could stay lost in this feeling forever, but I want that untouchable height of orgasm more, so I stop resisting and let it happen. Suddenly I’m screaming out and overwhelmed with blinding pleasure pulsing throughout my entire body. Silas continues assailing me with his tongue and fingers until the last waves of my orgasm finally subside.
Falling Ash Page 19
