by Hayden Hunt
And I’m not criticizing them or trying to seem superior at all. The process isn’t exactly user-friendly. You have to load up your entire roll of film in a complete pitch-black room in order to not ruin your film with light. Then you’ve got to make sure you’re timing your chemicals perfectly after you go to develop the thing. There was a lot of room for mistakes. I completely understood the importance of having a mistake roll of film before the professor gives us a real assignment.
I’ve got to say, though, after drying my film and checking out the negatives on a light box, I was pretty pleased with what I’d done. I was eager to get into the dark room and print at least a couple of these bad boys.
To my surprise, Patrick didn’t seem to have a lot of trouble today. I wasn’t next to him the entire class, of course, and I was grateful for that. We were all moving around to develop our film. But I kept a distant eye on him, just out of curiosity, and he wasn’t struggling. He put his roll of film next to mine in the dryer and I was surprised to see that it came out well. Not too dark, not too light, which means, not only did he develop the film well, but he also managed to meter his photos correctly.
I considered commenting on his good work, but I was scared to start a whole new conversation with him. So I kept to myself until we had all finished and were back in our seats for the end of the class.
“All right, everyone, great work today. I’m going to have you all sign your name on the top of your negative sheets and hand them in at my front desk when you leave. But don’t get up yet,” she cautioned to the people already packing their bags, “I need to give you your next assignment. We’re delving right into a section on portrait photography, so, look to the person sitting to the right of you. That is your new project partner. Starting from the first person over, each row should have three partnerships.”
Oh, shit.
My head immediately jerked to the end of my row, hoping that Patrick wasn’t going to be assigned to me. But, sure enough, there were two partnerships formed to my right. I was the fifth person, Patrick was the sixth, and that meant we were partnered.
He gave me a goofy, feel-good grin, and I tried to return it. But goddammit, the last person I wanted to be partnered with was him.
Okay, that’s not fair, there are probably plenty of more annoying people in this class that I haven’t met. And he did seem like a nice guy. Plus, he had managed to shoot and develop a roll of film, so he wasn’t totally helpless.
“You and your partner are each going to shoot a roll of film of each other. You two can decide where you want to shoot it. It’s a free-for-all. As long as your partner is the subject of your photos, you can do whatever you want, but bring the roll back by next class period. This is an assignment roll, so you’re going to have to choose at least two photographs from this roll to print and turn in to me. Make sure you’re doing your best work. When you drop by my desk to hand in your negatives, be sure to also grab the assignment guidelines.” She pointed to a large stack of white paper. “Have a good day everyone.”
I did my best not to let out an audible groan. Not only was I going to have to spend an afternoon photographing this guy, but that now also meant I couldn’t just exit class and escape him. We actually had to have a discussion about our project.
“Hey, so I guess we’re partnered up!” Patrick said cheerfully.
“Yep, guess so.”
“I’m glad, man. You really seem to know what you’re doing.”
I’ll admit, this compliment softened me up a bit. “Well, your roll didn’t come out bad either. I mean, I couldn’t see the pictures on it, of course, but it looked good lighting-wise.”
“Yeah, thanks! I actually light meter myself on my digital camera, so that part was a breeze for me.”
Huh, so he is a photography major. Or, at least, he’s a photographer.
“I didn’t know you were into photography?”
He laughed. “Yeah, I guess that’d be hard to gather based on my performance in the first class, huh?”
I smiled politely. “Well, it did seem a little new to you…”
“Yeah, well, this definitely is. To be honest, I probably wouldn’t be doing this class if it weren’t required. I’m addicted to my digital photography, what can I say? Photoshop is a godsend.”
“So, you’re a photographer?”
“Yeah, well, not a professional… Not yet, at least. But that’s what I’m here for. What about you? Is this just a gen-ed class for you, or…”
“Oh, no, it’s not just a gen-ed class. I’m not actually even going for a degree. I’m just interested in photography… I mean, I’m not exactly a photographer, though. I also want to do it professionally, though, whenever that’s possible for me.”
“Hey, awesome! So we’ve got a partnership of aspiring photographers. I bet our project totally kicks ass, man.”
I tried not to laugh at him too hard. His enthusiasm was still a little annoying, but now that we were talking about something with actual substance, it was growing on me.
“So, when and where do you want to meet up to do this project?” I asked, as I stood up to hand in my negative and grab the assignment sheet.
“Are you free tomorrow? Tomorrow is my lightest day, as far as classes and work go.”
“Yeah, I work from eight to four, but other than that I’m available.”
“Sweet, we can hit golden hour! In either the morning or evening.”
“Golden hour…?” I asked, sure that this was some slang I wasn’t privy to.
“Yeah, you know, golden hour. The best hour of light during the day? It’s the hour after sunrise or before sunset.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Oh! So it’s a photography term?”
“Yeah, totally.”
I’d been doing a lot of research, but, surprisingly, I hadn’t heard that. Though I wasn’t terribly insulted that I didn’t know. I’m not the kind of person who gets insecure about that kind of thing. In fact, I love to be taught new things.
And the fact that Patrick knew this, whereas I didn’t, made me like him even more. Obviously, he is a more serious photography student than I had initially imagined. I probably shouldn’t have been so quick to judge him.
“Well, golden hour works great for me. How about before sunset, though? I’m not really keen on anything that forces me to be up earlier than I have to be.”
He laughed again. “I feel you, man. I was hoping you’d say that. I am not a fucking morning person, not at all. Where do you want to meet?”
“Oh, I don’t know…” I thought about it. “How about the lake?”
Our town’s lake is a pretty picturesque place. Not just because of the water, which is nice. But the area that surrounds it is fantastic, too. Off to the right of the lake is this nature trail that leads into a forest-y area. On the other side of the lake, is a sandy beach. So it seems like the most versatile place around here to shoot some portrait photography. We could get plenty of different kind of landscapes in one shot.
“Yeah, sure, that sounds great. Meet me at the red tree an hour and a half before sunset, then?”
The red tree is a tree smack dab in the front of the lake that, a long time ago, had been spray painted red at the bottom. Nobody really knew why, it hadn’t been done to any other trees around the lake. But it did serve as a good, distinctive place to meet up.
“Okay, I’ll see you then.” I nodded.
“Awesome, seeya!”
To my surprise, he didn’t linger in our conversation like he usually did. He must have been getting a phone call or something, because he grabbed his phone out of his pocket and answered it as he walked toward the parking lot.
I still found him kind of annoying but I was surprised to be feeling a little bit better about the project. At the very least, he knew what he was doing, which would make this a lot easier.
And he wouldn’t be a bad guy to do portrait photography of, either. He was actually quite handsome… If you could get past the overly outgoi
ng personality, that is.
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Cold Turkey
14
Daniel
“Thank you!” I said cheerfully to the taxi cab driver as I handed him cash.
“No problem, Happy Thanksgiving!”
“Happy Thanksgiving to you too!” I said as I grabbed my suitcase out of the backseat and started walking toward my parents’ front door.
I had this weird mix of excitement and nervousness going. But I needed to do this, it had been a long time coming. I hadn't been home for Thanksgiving in six years.
To be fair, that wasn’t all my fault. My rocky relationship with my parents was a two-way street. I may have not done much to mend our relationship, but neither had they. And they were the adults in the relationship.
But I was an adult now too. Well, technically I’d been an adult since 18, but everyone knows you’re still essentially a child at that point. I matured slowly over the past several years. I finally felt like I was at a point where I could take the first step in improving our relationship.
I was their only child after all. I had no siblings, nobody else to call my family. And, admittedly, I was pretty lonely because of this.
I guess that was the whole reason I decided to come out here in the first place. I made the decision three weeks ago when I overheard my coworkers discussing going back home for the holidays. We had a very generous chunk of time off for Thanksgiving and most people took advantage of that by traveling to their home towns.
I usually just used the extra time to lounge around my apartment, binge watching TV shows and eating Chinese food leftovers on Thanksgiving day. Which never bothered me before. In fact, I enjoyed not having to fight with my family over the holidays.
But I guess as I’d grown up and started to think about settling down with my own family one day, it made me reflect on how shitty things were with my own. And I didn’t want to continue down this path with them.
The first few years I missed Thanksgiving with them, they asked what my plans were or if I planned on coming home. But after a few years of rejecting their offers, they stopped asking. They didn’t even mention it this year.
But that was perfect because it gave me the opportunity to drop in on them by surprise. It made me a little nervous just showing up at their house after so many years of not coming home, but I was their son. I knew as soon as my mom opened the door, she was going to be thrilled I took the initiative to come here.
At least, I hoped she was. I hoped they both were.
I started pulling my suitcase up the rocky gravel of their driveway. They desperately needed it repaved. The whole house was slowly falling into disarray. The grass was way too long and dying in some spots, and paint was chipping off the wood panels.
It was an old house, but I was kind of surprised to see this. My father was pretty good with his hands and he used to be meticulous about keeping the lawn nice and green. But maybe as they’d gotten older, he hadn’t been able to keep up with it as much. He did work a lot. I was always amazed he was able to find time to do anything around the house honestly.
I rang the doorbell once, my heart racing as I waited for my mom to come to the door. Undoubtedly, my father would be on the couch glued to whatever football game was on television.
But minutes passed, and nobody came to the door. I rang it once more, starting to tap my foot with nervousness.
Still, nobody answered. This was weird—where else would they be at this time on Thanksgiving? They didn’t know I was coming but I very specifically asked them if they’d be home on Thanksgiving for this reason. They had told me they would be, that they would just be cooking at home like usual.
I tried to peek in through the blinds of the window to see if any lights were on inside, but I couldn’t see anything. I rang the doorbell once more and then decided I would give my mom a call.
I didn’t want to do that; I really wanted the surprise to be in person. But what else was there to do at this point?
“Hello?” she answered, sounding surprised to hear me call on Thanksgiving.
“Hey, Mom, where are you?” I asked.
“I’m at home, sitting at the kitchen table. Why do you ask?”
“You haven’t heard the doorbell ring?” I asked, hoping to somehow still preserve the surprise.
“No, we don’t have one.”
I was completely confused and starting to think she wasn’t hearing me right.
“Mom, no, the doorbell,” I emphasized. “Have you heard the doorbell?”
“I told you, we don’t have one.”
“Don’t have one what?”
“A doorbell.”
I started to get a little scared at this point. We’d had a doorbell the entire time I lived here. This was the only house I grew up in. Was something wrong with her? My mind immediately went to early Alzheimer’s or dementia or something. How could she forget we had a doorbell?
“What are you talking about, Mom? Of course there is a doorbell! There’s always been a doorbell at our house.”
“At our old house, you mean?” she asked.
My heart sank.
“What do you mean, old house?”
“I mean, the house we lived in when you were growing up. It had a doorbell. Our new house doesn’t.”
“Your new house?” I gasped. “You moved?”
“Well, yeah, two years ago.”
“Two years ago? And you never bothered to tell me this?”
“I guess not,” she said nonchalantly. “I don’t know why we would. It’s not as though you ever come to visit us.”
“Uh, how about the fact that I’m your son? And I haven’t even known where you’ve been living?”
“Well, I don’t know what to tell you. I didn’t think it mattered much. I still am not sure why you’re so upset over this.”
I tried to take a deep breath in. This was all a reminder of why we had a falling out in the first place. God, she could be so clueless and so selfish. How did neither of them think to contact me about moving houses?
I was their son, for crying out loud! This was how it’d always been, though. I always felt like an unimportant third wheel in my own household.
But I wasn’t going to get mad. This was probably still salvageable. I could just get a cab over to their new house and surprise them that way. I didn’t think she even suspected yet that I came home for the holiday.
“So what street are you living on now?” I asked.
“The street?” she said, confused.
“Yeah, what street are you at?”
“Well, Daniel, I don’t think you’re going to recognize the street name or anything.”
I laughed. “Mom, I know it’s been a few years, but I grew up here. I still remember every street, trust me.”
“You didn’t grow up here. You grew up in Greenton.”
“Yes, I… Wait! Are you saying you moved out of Greenton?”
“Well, yeah, we moved out of the state.”
“Out of the state?” I nearly shouted.
Oh my God, this was so much worse than I thought. I was pissed when I thought they had just moved houses without me. But they had moved out of the God damn state?
“You know we used to always talk about moving down to Florida.” She said casually.
“Florida? No, you never mentioned Florida to me in my entire life! I… I cannot fucking believe this.”
“You can’t possibly be mad about this!” she said, beginning to get defensive. “You rarely ever call us! It’s not as if you’ve been a big part of our lives or anything.”
“Big part of your lives? Mom, I’m your fucking son. Your only son. I should matter enough that you can tell me when you move out of the fucking state.”
“Don’t use that language with me! You have no right to be mad. Besides, now you know, so no h
arm done.”
“Uh, yes, harm done, Mom! I’m in Greenton!”
“What?” she asked.
“I was going to surprise you guys and come down for Thanksgiving. I’m in Greenton, in front of my childhood home, as we speak.”
“Well, that is pretty unfortunate,” she said, as if I’d just told her I forgot to grab milk at the grocery store.
“Yeah! A little unfortunate! What the hell am I supposed to do now?”
“I don’t know, Daniel. You could have called. We would have told you we moved out of Greenton.”
“Right, I could have booked a flight to Florida instead,” I said in an exasperated tone.
“Well, no, probably not. We live in a small condo. It’s no place for visitors, anyway.”
“Wait…” I began slowly. “You’re not saying what I think you’re saying, right?”
“This is why you need to call, Daniel.”
“So you’re saying even if I had asked, you wouldn’t let me visit you on Thanksgiving?”
She gave an annoyed groan. “We just don’t have the room, Daniel. It’s nothing personal.”
I had to literally laugh at that. “No, you’re right, it is nothing personal. That’s kind of the issue, right? I’m not a personal member of this family. We don’t have a personal relationship and we never have.”
“Well whose fault is that?” she snapped. “You never wanted to visit before. You never tried to call. You’re not innocent in this!”
“You are my mother!” I argued. “You two are my parents. You were supposed to make me feel loved and cared for and all of that nurturing shit. Instead, you guys pushed me away as far as you possibly could. You kept your distance until I was eighteen and then you couldn’t have been happier to have me out of your life, right?”
She sighed. “Look, Daniel, I must go. I’m baking a few pies for tomorrow and—”
“Oh, sorry Mom, am I ruining your Thanksgiving weekend with all my issues?’
