What the Heart Desires

by Jaime Derelle

  She looked for her laptop which was still inside one of the boxes. When she found it, she sat on the bed and leaned on the wall. She turned her laptop on and logged into her messenger. She found that Gwen was also online.

  Theresa told Gwen about the town she is living in. She asked Gwen how she was doing back in the city. Gwen said she is doing perfectly fine, and the person who bought off her house feels really satisfied for buying the house.

  "Well, I just don't want it to cause me any problem in the future."

  “Glad to have taken it off your hands,” Gwen said.

  They both talked for an hour or so before they went to sleep.

  The next morning, Theresa was standing on the porch admiring the view she couldn't get in the city. With a cup of warm chocolate milk, Jonathan came out of his house and walked toward Theresa, as he noticed her standing there.

  He greeted her and then with obvious nervousness, politely asked her if she would accompany him to a festival called the “white present”.

  Theresa asked out of curiosity, "White Present?"

  He told her that it was better to see it. Theresa wondered what Jonathan was referring to. She had never heard of the term "white present" before. She then assumed that it was something local. Referring to their earlier conversation she remarked;

  “This isn’t some elaborate scheme to deliver on your promise said promise about torturing me, is it?” she asked with a teasing grin.

  With a totally straight face, he answered her that she could look upon that as a prospect of the festival. They both burst out laughing after that and Theresa assured Jonathan that he had a date.

  Later that evening, Jonathan was already waiting for her in front of his house right next to his old dented truck. Theresa had chosen a simple bright blue frock that billowed out as she walked while Jonathan looked dashing in a new pair of jeans and a black button down shirt.

  Theresa walked out of her house and approached Jonathan. They drove to the small park across the mayor's house. As they passed by, every corner of the street and shops are filled with people. Theresa was awed. What sort of event could gather that many people, she wondered.

  They managed to find a spot to park, got out of the truck and blended in with the locals in the middle of the park. There was, already, such a sense of togetherness here that was missing from the coldness of the city.

  Jonathan greeted some of the locals and introduced her to each of them. There was Charles the mayor, Carl the barber, Grace, who owned the pet shop, Peter, who owned the liquor store, and a bunch of other people who open-heartedly welcomed Theresa into the community.

  Charles took the hint from Theresa’s face that she was totally clueless about what the occasion was about. Mayor Charles did her a favor and explained the tradition that this little town had every now and then. It was called White Present. White was referred to Christmas. This event was devoted as an indication that Christmas is around the corner. And the word Present referred to how the locals presumed that everyone who was still able to celebrate Christmas together with the family and friends were the people who were already being given the most meaningful present for Christmas. This occasion was done annually by the locals to remind them that they still have each other to celebrate Christmas with.

  Soon, the festivities, games and drinking started. Everyone started dancing, the fervor of the festival loosening all inhibitions. Theresa danced till her feet hurt, with as many people as she could and enjoyed herself immensely.

  “Having fun?” Jonathan asked, settling down on the ground next to her. The grass was cold but refreshing and the air crisp.

  “More than I’ve had in a long time. Thank you for bringing me,” she smiled back, gratefully.

  “Why don’t you thank me in earnest by dancing with me?” Jonathan asked his eyes and hair gleaming in the moonlight.

  “I don’t know if my feet could take another dance,” Theresa replied, laughing.

  “You have my permission to fall down anytime during the dance,” Jonathan replied, smiling teasingly.

  Theresa laughed while standing up. She had not had such fun in a long time. The casual city dates bored her now but Jonathan’s version of a date had not only amazed her but also refreshed her spirit.

  Theresa asked him, looking around, “Music?”

  “Who needs it,” Jonathan remarked while looking up at the sky. Theresa was confused but before she could say anything, Jonathan pulled her towards his body in a jerk. Her breath rushed out at the impact as his arms encircled her waist. She held on to his shoulders as he started moving in a small arc. Theresa understood the rhythm in a while and followed him, only stumbling twice.

  “Place your feet on mine,” Jonathan whispered in her ear.

  Theresa took off her shoes and did as he asked. The action brought them closer and Theresa was all but hugging him as he smoothly moved around.

  That night, Theresa went home past midnight but as she lay down to sleep, there was a certain hope and a peace that had never been there before. She slept peacefully, free from all deadlines and pending projects.

  Chapter 4

  Theresa was sleeping like a baby when the clock showed 6:54 AM and her room was freezing cold even without her air conditioning turned on. She shivered and pulled her blanket toward her. But then the cold was too unbearable that she had to open her eyes and wake up. She took and unlocked her phone to check the time. She realized that it was still too early for her to get up just yet, but it was also too cold to go back to sleep. She wanted something warm, but she knew that Jonathan’s place wasn’t going to be open before 9. She wished it was open already.

  Theresa got up from the bed and trying to avoid as much contact as could be possible from the ice cold floor hopped to the kitchen.

  She ended up making a hot cocoa. She added milk, sugar, and warm cinnamon to the saucepan. She hadn't tried out the taste as long as it was warm by the hand first and then it was good enough.

  She walked out to the balcony. When she slid open the door to the balcony, the wind blew inside and made shivers run through her back. But she still went out regardless. It was as cold, but the wood floor on the balcony was a lot better than the ceramic floor inside.

  Theresa really loved this small and beautiful town despite the piercing wind on the back of her hand, her cheek and her feet at the moment.

  It had only been a week or so, but deep inside, Theresa felt it. She knew she made the right decision in coming here.

  She saw the sun was rising, very slowly, as far as her eye could see.

  From where she stood, she saw a garbage truck, which was taking the trash four houses away from her house. She figured Uncle George had not woken up, so she went back to the kitchen to throw the trash out before the trash man missed the house.

  She wrapped all the trash into a black plastic bag, slipping her feet into her sneakers to be quick. She went outside and walked down the steps. The garbage truck was still three houses away. Theresa walked down the marble path to get to the waste bin next to the mailbox.

  Halfway there, Theresa slipped and fell due to the cold weather, which had made the floor rather icy and slippery.

  "Whoa! Easy there." It was Jonathan.

  Jonathan held Theresa's arm and helped her up.

  “Tell that to my frozen butt,” she complained making a sour face.

  Jonathan took the plastic bag to help Theresa. He grabbed it and swung it over to his left shoulder. Right when he about to take the first step, he slipped over and fell. The sound of his body hitting the ground was painful.

  *Grunt*

  Jonathan fell. And he looked better on the ground than Theresa. It made her laugh. She laughed so hard that her eyes closed.

  "It's funny, isn't it?" Jonathan poked Theresa on her sides and made her laugh louder and rolled on the floor.

  They were both laughing as the garbage truck arrived in front of them.

  “Aren’t you guys cozy early in the morning?” The garb
age collector teased both of them who were playing like little kids.

  Jonathan stood up and handed the trash to the garbage collector.

  As the garbage truck moved on to the next house, Jonathan put his hands on his waist and turned around, only to find Theresa was still sitting on the floor, smiling at him.

  He walked closer to Theresa and helped her up.

  Jonathan only looked at her while she felt shy and looked down to the ground.

  Before she left, Jonathan called her once more.

  “Yes?” Theresa responded so quickly as if she was expecting it.

  “It’s going to be snowy in a week or two. I have something to take care of in the barn. Would you like to come along?” Jonathan invited Theresa to his barn where he kept his chickens and stock horses.

  Theresa was thinking and out of the blue, she covered her mouth and laughed excessively to herself. Jonathan was confused, thought if he said something funny.

  Theresa laughed at Jonathan’s simple yet sweet effort to ask her out while she was accustomed to how things worked in the city; Suit and tie, fancy car and dinner. While all they need here were courtesy and sincerity, and little guts.

  Theresa stopped laughing because she felt Jonathan would feel bad if she kept it up. Theresa agreed to come along with him.

  "Alright, I'll see you here, then?" Jonathan referred to how he was going to pick Theresa up.

  "Okay," Theresa smiled and went back inside.

  With nothing else to do, she walked back into her room and switched on her laptop. She checked her mail and there was a message from Gwen. She started reading but then as she read dread settled into her stomach and her brilliant decision to settle over here now seemed like a mistake. In her message Gwen had stated that she worried for her and on an instinctual urge she had hired a private investigator. After a week of investigating, he had reported that Robert was having no affair and she also hinted that it could’ve been a lie meant as an emotional blow to at least give birth to remorse at her behavior towards him. She couldn’t read anymore so she shut the laptop down and lay down and thought about her decision to come here and her growing relationship with Jonathan.

  Later that afternoon, Theresa went outside and found Jonathan was already standing there, leaning on his motorcycle. The wind was blowing, and it ruffled Jonathan's hair giving him a carefree look. Theresa laughed again as she saw Jonathan trying to look macho.

  "Look at you, all Hollywood." Theresa giggled.

  "What about this? Nothing Hollywood about it, God gifted, I’m afraid “He ran his fingers through his hair.

  They both laughed at their remarks.

  Jonathan turned the keys to his bike and sat on it.

  "Come." He motioned for her to sit behind him.

  He started his engine and they went on their way to Jonathan's barn which was not far from where they lived. As they passed the second intersection, Theresa saw white fences alongside the road, dividing the streets and the wide meadow on the other side.

  They rode on the motorcycle alongside it and Theresa saw two brown mares in the field. One was cozily in the middle of the meadow eating grass, and the other one was running around as if it was having fun. By the time they rode halfway to the barn along the fence; the horse that was running aimlessly ran toward them and ran along with them on the other side of the fence as if it was waiting for Jonathan's arrival.

  They arrived at the barn and Jonathan came down from his motorcycle and Theresa stood next to it. He walked toward the barn door and pulled the hinge that was locking it up. He opened the door wide, and the sound of chickens could be heard from where Theresa stood. Theresa followed Jonathan inside, and she was amazed by the sight. Flocks of chicken were running around aimlessly. And she also saw flocks of little yellow chicks around.

  Jonathan took a silver metal bucket from on top of the haystack which happened to be filled with corn kernels. As he walked toward another end of the barn, he took a handful of the kernels and scattered it around the barn for the chickens to eat.

  Theresa was looking at the chickens. As a city girl, the only chicken she ever saw was in the ones on her plate. As she looked back up, she saw Jonathan was already out there, so she followed.

  "Do all those chickens belong to you?" Theresa asked out of curiosity as to how he was able to raise that much.

  Jonathan put his hands on his waist.

  "All I own was one hen," He said.

  Theresa stood in front of him, "One? I am quite sure I saw more than just one,"

  Jonathan laughed.

  "Everyone in this town likes to share. I only had the place. Then there's this old man, he gave me a pair of chicken and asked me to help him raise it. And so I did. But he passed away not long afterward."

  Theresa listened attentively.

  "He left his chicken with me. And there they are. Before I knew what I should do with them, I decided that they are for everyone. Any townsfolk who wants them for their cooking, I gladly give them away.”

  “And every once in a while, people come and give enough money for me to buy fodder for them," Jonathan explained.

  Jonathan then put his fingers in his mouth and whistled loudly. The horse that was running around responded and ran toward Jonathan as he walked to the horse that was in the middle of the meadow.

  They were surprisingly tame. Theresa just stood there seeing a different kind of beauty from what she usually saw in the city where it all came from fame, money, modern technology. While this, this beauty came from a touch of a man with nature. Theresa was mesmerized. Jonathan came to Theresa with one of the horses while the other one energetically followed from behind.

  "This is Marybeth," Jonathan said as he pats the horse's head.

  Theresa reached her hand out as she wanted to touch the horse. The other horse, Bradley, got to where they stood and neighed and surprised Theresa before she could touch Marybeth's head.

  Jonathan asked if she would like to ride her.

  "Uh, I'm not sure." Theresa hesitated.

  Jonathan went to the stable and took out a saddle and put it on Marybeth.

  "Hop on." Jonathan offered his hand so she can get on.

  "What if she hops around and I fall?" Theresa wanted to get on, but she looked worried.

  "Then you embrace mother earth in a very unceremonious way and your butt will again be sore though not from the cold this time." Jonathan teased her.

  “Go on.” Jonathan continued.

  Theresa hopped onto Marybeth. Jonathan hit Marybeth on the back very lightly, and she started to move.

  Theresa squealed given this is her first time riding a real horse.

  Marybeth took Theresa for a slow spin around the meadow. Theresa’s heart was beating fast. She was nervous.

  As Theresa was watching on the other side of the fence, Jonathan approached from behind, riding another horse. He looked at Theresa and smiled to her. Theresa had so much fun. But somehow deep inside she felt something was odd.

  She remembered the terrible misunderstanding that had got her here. Her face changed, and she frowned. She enjoyed Jonathan’s company. But she wasn’t sure she was right to do this to Robert who hadn’t done any wrong by her and she admitted that she had begun to take him for granted. All of her time that she had spent here happily now seemed to her like fruit from a tree that she hadn’t planted.

  “What’s wrong?” Jonathan asked as he felt something was different with Theresa. She looked over at him, the way his eyes smiled at her with such sincerity and understanding. She knew Robert may not have been at fault but he had also never understood her. She had wanted someone she could relax with and is herself but instead, with Robert the expectations and the constant pushing had made her resent their time together. She had started taking him for granted because all he cared about was he. His work and his duties were important and not to be tampered with but her schedule should always be flexible for his whims.

  This time, it felt so right. Theresa felt con
fident of Jonathan. She knew Jonathan wouldn’t hurt her. Or so she hoped.

  Jonathan dismounted and helped Theresa to dismount as well. Jonathan took away the saddle from the horses and carried it to the stable while Theresa sat and waited on a huge log by the barn.

  When Jonathan came back, he sat next to Theresa.

  Once again he asked Theresa what was wrong.

  Theresa sighed deeply and decided to tell him the reason of why came to the town and why now it seemed like she had made a mistake.

  Theresa’s voice trembled as she spoke and Jonathan’s jaw clenched when he heard of her misunderstanding. It had gotten colder and Jonathan offered to get something to eat though he used it more as an excuse to stop her from talking. Theresa agreed, and she suggested going to his place.

  “I like your pancakes,” She said and smiled weakly.

  Jonathan stood up and reached out his hand to help Theresa get up.

  Jonathan locked the barn and got onto his motorcycle. They rode away and head to Jonathan’s bistro, Wright’s. They arrived at Jonathan’s place and she got down from Jonathan’s motorcycle. Right after she was about to place another foot on the ground, she slipped and fell.

  *Squeal*

  “Whoa!” Jonathan was as surprised as Theresa was. The only difference was, with less pain.

  “I’m starting to think this is getting intentional.” Jonathan laughed and got down from his motorcycle. Theresa smiled awkwardly, and she didn’t know what to say.

  Jonathan helped her up but put too much power when he pulled her up. She ended up hugging him.

  It wasn’t intentional, but the guy who walked out of the restaurant grinned as if it was a couple hug.

  Theresa pushed and moved away slightly from Jonathan and walked inside. Jonathan followed afterward.

  Theresa sat near the window like she did the first time she got there. Jonathan went to the bar to get some food and something warm for Theresa. He brought it to her table.

  As Jonathan sat down, he thought to himself that the push earlier wasn't anything big. Before Jonathan said anything, Theresa cleared her throat, catching Jonathan's attention.