"He was your bodyguard."
Calli thought of what Gabe did to her body and it wasn't in the job description. "I can't work here anymore." She leveled a hard look at him. "I don't want to."
She spun on her heels and exited the room. Daniel gazed at the empty doorway. This whole mess had backfired. Except for Murdock. He'd approached Rodrigez and they'd caught Murdock, leveling charges of corporate espionage. Daniel was forced to admit Calli was right. The young parolee hadn't betrayed them. He'd already gone to the head of systems security and told him to be on the lookout. And the instant she'd returned, Rodrigez had confided in Calli.
Daniel was losing her to God knew what company or restaurant and not because he'd sent Gabe after her. She wasn't happy at Excalibur anymore. Gabe did his job too well, he thought. What had gone on, Daniel didn't want to know. He knew Gabe well enough to come to a few conclusions. None of them pleasant. He never expected Calli to be affected by the man. He was hard as diamonds and just as sharp. But if she's hurting this bad, he wondered, what about Gabe? Daniel adored Calli and could hardly bear her pain. She could never hide her feelings very well, anyway. She was everything a man wanted in a daughter and when his wife learned she was leaving because of his interference, he was going to suffer more than Calli. Heck. It couldn't get any worse, Daniel thought, and reached for the phone, dialing.
"Yeah."
"Good, you sound rotten. I don't know what went on in New Mexico, Gabe, but you sure as hell made a mess."
Silence and then, "What went on was you interfering in my life again, Danny boy."
Daniel's lips twisted in a wry smile. "Maybe, but I'm paying. Believe me."
"So."
Daniel plowed his fingers through his neatly styled silver hair. "She's leaving."
"Always knew Calli was a smart woman."
Daniel heard the catch in his voice when he said her name. He wasn't over her.
"No, not just Excalibur. She's leaving the state."
Another moment of painful quiet, then, "Afraid your business will go down the tubes?"
Daniel ground his teeth and spoke from the heart. "Calli means more to me than you'll ever understand, Gabe. She's a good woman and you need to clean up this mess so she can get on with her life."
"She'll be fine."
Daniel wondered how this man could spend weeks with a woman like Calli and still be so cold. "You know, Gabe," he said philosophically, "I never knew you to walk away from a second chance."
"There isn't one this time."
Daniel swung the leather chair around and stared out the wide window. "How are you going to know, man, if you don't ask?"
There was a hesitation and Daniel could hear his frustrated sigh. Then the line went dead.
Gabe laid the phone down and dug the heels of his palms into his eyes, his elbows braced on his knees. Her expression, the look of utter devastation in her eyes, burst through his mind. Again. A lump thickened in his throat. Aw, baby, he thought, I didn't mean to hurt you like that. She was leaving her job, her home and vanishing. Can't keep screwing up your own life, he thought, now you're screwing with hers. But Gabe couldn't do anything about it. She was gone. He was alone. And Daniel's implication that he could ask for a second chance was a pipe dream. He had killed what they'd shared by lying to her after they'd been intimate.
He pushed off the bench and marched across the dry yard.
"Turn it around," Gabe snapped, pointing to Geyser's head and the ball cap turned backward. "You're not on the block here, homeboy."
Geyser glared at him from beneath a shock of blond hair, shifting his cap around before hefting the rake again. He scraped it across the yard, gathering large stones. "What you do to make her go, Gabe?"
Gabriel stopped short and cocked a look back over his shoulder. His pale gaze pierced and warned.
"Never mind," Geyser muttered, and kept to his job.
"Where are you going?" Gabe demanded of Bull as he passed him.
"Someone's got to feed these kids." Bull eyed him. "You want to do it?"
"No." He couldn't go near the kitchen without being slaughtered with memories.
"Thought maybe some of her talent rubbed off on you. Her sweetness sure as hell didn't." Bull glared back at him and with a curse, Gabe turned away and headed to the barn, ordering Deek to follow. Deek looked at the others, apprehension in his eyes before he obeyed.
"Sweep out number two and three, break open another bale, then water the McKinny horses."
Gabe picked up a shovel and piled dung into a wheelbarrow.
"Want me to walk Guinevere?"
"No!" Gabe roared as he spun around. Deek reared back, instinctively bringing his arms up to block his head. The move penetrated the guilty fog and he realized what he was doing, to all of them. His shoulders sank. He threw down the shovel and raked a dirty, blistered hand through his hair. He was making them pay for the hurt only he'd caused.
"Go, take a break." He waved Deek off and the boy vanished in a hard run.
Gabe leaned his back against the wall and slowly sank to the ground. He was bone tired, the dull ache in his chest heightening his weariness. He couldn't remember the last time he'd taken even a couple hours off, but his ranch was finally showing a profit. He'd already turned down two boarders for lack of stalls and would have to build another barn soon. But all the repairs and horses to train weren't going to erase the unspeakable loss he felt with every heartbeat. Calli was gone, yet she was everywhere. He rubbed his eyes, the sting reminding him he hadn't slept. He couldn't. His bedroom came alive with her scent every night, the memory of her body fitting to his, her hands on him. Gabe closed his eyes tightly, trying to push a list of necessary work into his brain.
He failed. God, he couldn't even eat without thinking about her. Every time he walked toward the house, he saw her in the shade of the kitchen, smiling, cooking, offering him samples and he especially remembered the look in her eyes when she'd found something he liked. It made him feel the damage he'd done to her again and again, forging a sorrow so unfamiliar he thought he would go mad. He needed her to survive, he admitted finally.
God, Gabe thought, pinching the bridge of his nose and blinking. He loved her so much it hurt to breathe.
Calli didn't bother to turn on the lights and tossed her keys on the credenza, kicking off her shoes as she moved to the sofa. She dropped into the soft cushions and put her feet up, leaning her head back and closing her eyes. Her apartment was quiet, painfully lonely. She supposed she ought to start packing, but lacked the motivation. Instead, she let her mind wander.
Mentally she ticked off chores to do, but her thoughts came back to Gabe. Always Gabriel. His face, his eyes. And always with a dull, hard throb in her chest. Lord, she missed him. Everything felt worthless and empty without him in her life and as she'd done every night since she'd left him, she argued with herself. She should have demanded reasons, pushed him to explain. But he hadn't offered them; he wouldn't tell you how he felt. The painful reality was that she'd gambled on the wrong kind of man and lost. She'd loved him, still loved him, even more than the moment he let her walk away.
"Hey, baby."
Her eyes flashed open. Her heart slammed against the wall of her chest, then sank like a stone. Gabriel. He was in her living room, his shoulder braced on the tall window frame, one hand in the pocket of his black pleated slacks, the other catching a short tailored jacket slung over his shoulder. His white collarless shirt contrasted against his tanned skin even in the darkness of her apartment. For a long moment she simply looked, absorbing the headiness of being near him again. Moonlight spilled through the sheer curtains behind him, shadowing his face, yet Calli's heart clenched as his gaze dipped and climbed over her body. She could feel it, it was so intense.
"How did you— Never mind." She tilted her head. "Does this mean you've returned to your old profession?"
"No."
"Daniel called you, didn't he?"
"Yes."
"Dam
n him!" She lurched out of the couch. "Being paid well this time?"
"You really think that?"
He heard her sigh. "No, I don't know what to believe anymore." She moved behind the sofa, switching on a light. Hesitantly, she lifted her gaze and inhaled sharply. He looked tired and tortured. "What do you want?"
Gabe could hardly control his need to hold her. A lump formed in his throat, the same one when he imagined her, remembered how much he'd hurt her and how much it hurt to live without her. He steeled his courage and jumped without a parachute.
"You."
Calli's heart beat so fast it threatened her breathing. She was thrilled he was here. Thrilled he looked as bad as she felt, but he was going to have to work for her this time.
Across the room they stared.
"You had me."
"I know."
"You let me leave." Her voice wobbled and she swallowed.
"After lying, I didn't have the right to ask you to stay."
"And what makes you think you do now?"
Her bitterness turned him back and his shoulders sank. "Nothing, I guess." He pushed away from the window frame.
Calli's heart crashed and burned. "Don't you dare walk away, Gabriel Griffin." He stilled, waiting. Her voice was wounded as she said, "Why couldn't you trust me when I trusted you?"
His gaze sketched her upturned face. "I wanted to. You don't know how much." He shook his head, infinitely sad. "But I'm not good enough for that."
"Oh, but I was only good enough for you to sleep with, but not love, huh?"
Gabe paled. "You know that's not true." Couldn't she see that just looking at her was killing him?
"Damn you, Gabriel! I know no such thing! For God's sake, you took a piece of my heart every time you touched me!"
Gabe remembered every moment they'd spent together. He'd been reliving it since he let her walk out the door. Her laugh; the way stupid peaches and coconuts made her teary-eyed; how she fought back and threw onions at him.
She was in front of him, gazing into his eyes. "Why did you come all the way to Texas?"
"I missed you."
She scoffed. "Missed regular sex maybe." And she walked away.
"Dammit, Calli!" He grabbed her by the arms and pulled her back. "You know it isn't that way between us. We're more than that! You can feel it now. I can feel it in you." He let a breath out through clenched teeth. "We belong."
Belong. Calli had never felt that until she was with him, until she loved him. "Then tell me, Gabriel," she whispered. "Why are you here?"
"I need you, Cal."
She frowned. "Need?" She wrestled out of his touch. "I need food, Gabe. I need showers and antiperspirant."
"Well. I never needed anyone! Never." She didn't speak, waiting, watching. "Hell, before, I was okay with being alone. It was the best for me and everyone else. I didn't mind being cut off. I'd been alone so long, it was all I knew." He glanced briefly away, swallowing. "But now…" He hesitated and took a breath, meeting her gaze. "I'm not doing too well without you, baby." His tone deepened, rasped. "And it's not getting any better."
She held his gaze. He was struggling to tell her his feelings. She knew Gabriel. It was the biggest step in his life to admit he was vulnerable, that he needed someone else.
He held his jacket in front of him by the collar like a shy cowboy holds his hat. "Cal … I know I hurt you—"
"Yes, you did, very badly."
His expression crumbled into utter regret. "I'm sorry, baby."
"I believe you." His pale eyes softened and the emotion she saw made her heart skip an entire beat. "Why did you let me leave, Gabe? Why didn't you call?" She was still far enough away that he couldn't touch her. If he did, she would be lost.
"Guilt. I'd lost your respect I saw it in your eyes. You'd been honest and trusting and I betrayed you."
"I realize you were keeping your promise to Darnel."
"Screw Daniel," he growled. "I might have owed him for not having me arrested and giving me a job—" Calli's eyes widened as she made the connection. "But I'd ruined the best thing in my life and I thought I could deal with it." He looked at the ceiling, briefly closing his eyes, his breath hissing out before he met her gaze. "You forgave the world, but I couldn't hope you'd ever find it in you to forgive me."
"I do."
His strong features tightened and Calli felt a sudden energy running through him and connecting to her. Still, he hesitated. "Why are you so terrified of loving me, Gabriel?"
"Because I'm not sure I know how!" came an anguished rasp. "You're so gentle and giving and, dammit, Calli, I can't be those things for you!"
"Oh, Gabriel," she whispered. "You are those things. I don't need you to be anything else but who you are. If I wanted more or different, I would have never let you touch me. And I would never have stayed so long." She moved closer, her lush body a whisper away from his. "You try too hard to be bad, you know. You are a good man." He shook his head, but she caught his face in her palms. "A good man held a newborn foal all night. A good man found me peaches and coconuts. A good man gave his last dollar to a vagrant." She slid her hands down to his chest, feeling the frantic beat of his heart against her palms. "A good man shares his heart without expecting anything in return."
"But I want something now," he whispered, dropping the jacket. "Bad." Gently, he put his hands on her waist. "I know I don't deserve—"
She covered his lips with two fingers. "You deserve whatever you truly want, Gabriel."
His lips shaped to her fingertips and as she slowly lowered her hand, Gabe took a risk and asked for his life. "A second chance. I want you, with me. I can't live without you."
Calli's vision blurred and her heart roared. "Why?"
He wet his lips. "I love you, Cal."
She inhaled. Her gaze explored his, recognizing the truth that had been there all along.
"I need to know—" he asked, fear in his eyes, "Do you still love me?"
He'd confessed and still laid his heart on the stone, a solitary man risking rejection over and over to be certain. "Yes. Oh, yes."
"I love you, Calli." Her eyes bloomed with tears and he sank his fingers into her hair, cupping the back of her neck and pulling her against him. "I love you," he whispered, reverent. "From the moment you bit me, I swear."
She laughed, gazing at him through watery eyes. "I'll have to remember that." She wound her arms around his neck and stood on her toes. "Kiss me, hurry."
He did, slowly, his strong arms wrapping around her, tight and protective. His kiss was heavy and soulful, pouring his love into her. Calli could feel the release in him. The shedding of old hurts and past pains. Neither of them would be lonely or alone again.
He pulled back and scattered kisses over her face, urging her head back. "God, I've missed you so much, baby, so damn much," he murmured against her throat.
Calli gripped his biceps. "Oh, Gabriel."
His hold tightened, his kisses feverish, insistent. "I love it when you say my name."
"I love you, Gabriel."
He lifted his head to look at her, then kissed her, quick and hot. "Say it again."
She smiled, teary-eyed. "I love you." She ran her hands down his shirt, hurriedly plucking buttons. "And I want to show you." She pushed the fabric off his shoulders.
Gabe grinned as she caressed his chest, his arms, her fingers loosening his burtons. "Dangerous words, woman."
"Don't I know it."
He chuckled, peeling off her jacket, then attacking her blouse. She gripped the band of his trousers, pulling him along as she back-stepped down a short hall toward her bedroom. They were all over each other, groping, teasing, arousing. Suddenly Gabe couldn't wait and pushed her back against the wall, grinding his body to hers as he kissed her relentlessly and tugged at her clothes, opened her blouse. He moaned against her lips as he filled his palms with her breasts. It's been too long, he thought.
She called out his name, whimpered at the familiar heat escalating
through her body.
"There's a bed a few feet away," she panted, licking his lips as she yanked open his belt buckle. His eyes flared and she sent the zipper down. His breath caught and she slipped her hand inside.
He was naked beneath.
"Oooh, you're wicked."
He choked as her hand closed over him. "Learned it from you," he managed to growl.
Kissing her greedily, he dragged her into the bedroom, kicking off his shoes, shaking off his shirt, then immediately stripping off her blouse. Desire flamed out of control, a savage need to come together making them clumsy. Gabe toed off his socks even as he reached for her skirt, sending it to the floor. She unclasped her bra and Gabe hesitated, watching as she freed her breasts. Then he pulled her roughly into his arms, one hand making a wild ride over her back, her satin-covered buttocks, the other cupping her breasts, his thumb circling her nipple. It felt so good to touch her again, to feel her skin on his, her hands on him.
She pushed his trousers down over his hips, stroking his firm flesh. He groaned darkly and kicked them aside.
"Calli…" He kissed the corner of her mouth. "Baby…" He scraped his teeth over her jaw, then down to her breast. "I want to go slow but—" He sat on the edge of the bed, pulling her between his thighs as he claimed her delicate nipple with his mouth. Calli clutched his head, hers thrown back as he tasted and teased. He hooked his thumbs in her panties and pulled, his mouth exploring her skin, reacquainting himself with the taste of her.
"Gabriel," she moaned, and he fell back, taking her with him, pulling her beneath him. She opened. He reached for a condom. She shook her head and guided his body home.
Eyes locked, a silent message of trust and love passing between them. She brushed hair from his forehead, felt him tremble.
"I love you," he whispered brokenly. Then he sank deeply into her softness. His features tightened, his eyes slamming shut for a second. "Oh, sweet mercy, you feel good."
"Oh, Gabe, I missed you. I missed you so much," she cried into his mouth.
"Me, too, baby. Oh, me, too." He clutched her, moving gently, and Calli answered, her body cradling his, stroking him, loving him. Her breath spilled in a ragged shudder. His hands slid beneath her hips, urging her closer. The cadence was at first smooth and urgent, then thrashing and raw. Friction brought tight, twisting pleasure, love gave it meaning and permanence. They strained and hungered, fingers dug, bodies arched, fused as they rocketed toward a shattering rapture unlike any before. They hovered on a mist of pleasure, blue eyes holding pale liquid green, before they sank into the still-made bed.
THE UNLIKELY BODYGUARD Page 18
