by Diana Ryan
I signed up for both of the courses and for the rest of the week, I continued my daily routine of attending classes, completing homework, and studying, but something inside me felt very off and I had an unexplainable and very overwhelming feeling of loneliness.
Memories started to slowly creep back to me in quick flashes throughout the week, but each time I saw a new memory in front of my eyes I experienced a strange and very intense pain in my head. It usually would go as quickly as it came, but unsettling just the same.
I went through my schedule as best I could, focusing on studying, but it still bothered me that my memory seemed to dart in and out. I was beginning to wonder if I should alert my parents, or see a doctor, but I didn’t want to worry my mom and it wasn’t like I couldn’t get through the day normally. So I decided to ride it out. If memories were coming back to me every day, then perhaps they’d continue to do just that as time went on.
On Friday, I decided to head over to the library after my Intro to Algebra class. The university library was a rather large and sterile feeling concrete building. At six floors tall, it overlooked all of campus. I was proud to admit that I had actually visited all six floors, and was most impressed with the movable stacks on the third through fifth floors. The long bookshelves were attached to a track on the ceiling and hung off the floor. They all stood together until a push of a button on the wall separated as many shelves as you needed until the book you wanted was exposed. Although I thought whoever engineered that system was a genius, I was always apprehensive to use the moving shelves because I was afraid someone might push the button while I was browsing and squish me flat as a pancake between the shelves. Death by books was not how I wanted to leave this world.
The first floor hosted a small natural science museum, the circulation desk, a large computer lab, and study lounge. Although the library was very populated this morning, it was also expectantly very quiet. I took out my math methods textbook and set my open notebook right next to it. I wanted to get my homework done before I headed home. It was Clara’s birthday and I knew there wouldn’t be an ounce of quiet all evening.
Just as I settled into the second paragraph on the math textbook page, my phone loudly announced someone was calling. All eyes in the room were quickly turning toward me.
Hurry! Turn it off!
But as I bent down to retrieve the darn thing from my backpack, my elbow slammed into the edge of the textbook, flipping it to the floor and sending my graphing calculator and pen flying through the air.
I winced when I heard the smack and felt the eyes of the entire room on me.
“Ow! What in the—?”
“Oh no,” I said under my breath. I thought about bolting out of there, but I heard my name.
A tall blond guy got up from his chair and approached me. I let out a groan when my eyes confirmed what my ears had recognized.
“Well, now we’re even!” he said.
Adam. What were the odds?
He continued, putting his hand to his chest. “Adam. Remember? I clobbered you in the student center lounge last week?”
“Yes…right, I remember.” The big purple blob with the British accent. There was no forgetting that. “Right, Adam. Now my calculator clobbered you. I guess we are even.”
“Exactly,” he said, smiling.
“I’m sorry, Adam. I’m a bona fide klutz.” It was true. There wasn’t a day that went by that I didn’t accidentally knock over something or trip and fall. I suddenly had a memory flash of brochures flying through the air. My eyebrows furrowed in confusion as the vision left as quickly as it came on.
“We’ve got to stop meeting this way. Soon enough one of us will end up in the hospital!” Adam pulled the chair out from the table and sat down.
Today his accent didn’t seem quite as annoying. Something was different about his appearance, too. I scanned his face and noticed his hideous haircut had changed. It was much shorter now and the large wave in the middle was gone. He looked much younger. It was quite an improvement from the other day.
Although my first impression of the guy wasn’t that great, he seemed a little more tolerable today.
I was not sure what possessed me, but I said, “My friends and I are going to the Homecoming game tomorrow. Would you like to join us?”
“Thanks for the invitation, but actually I’ll be there already. The Theta Sigs are hosting a fifty-fifty raffle. You should stop by the booth.”
Theta Sigs? Oh no, I usually tried to steer clear of those fraternity types.
“Oh. A frat boy. I thought you guys only fraternized with girls bearing big boobs and curly blond hair.”
He smiled as if he’d heard that one a thousand times before. “We all make exceptions for truly beautiful women.” I gave him a snarky smile before I realized it was a compliment. Then he leaned over and whispered, “It’s in our secret brotherly code.” He smiled as he watched it all sink into my face.
He was hitting on me.
I blushed a little bit and looked down at the table. I needed to change the subject off of me and back onto him. “So, Adam, when did you join the fraternity?”
“Believe it or not, I’m not from around here.” He paused to see my smile. “I arrived at the beginning of summer, and will just be here for the term. I’ve come from the University of Greenwich in London. I always thought I should get the real American college experience, so I joined a fraternity. We don’t have those in the UK, you know.”
“Really? I had no idea.” I awkwardly pushed a pen around the table. “What are you studying while you are here?”
“Communications. Someday I aim to anchor the London evening news! Do you think I have the voice for it?” He cleared his throat before I could answer. His voice dropped an octave and he had a very cheesy smile on his face. “And tonight on the BBC evening news…”
“Very good,” I admitted. “Actually, I have a lot of experience in public speaking. I could give you some pointers if you wanted.”
“Really?” He laughed. “Wait, you aren’t a radio personality or anything, right?”
I snickered. “No, no. I’m from a tourist trap in the middle of the state called Wisconsin Dells. I’ve been working as a tour boat guide for the last four summers.”
“A tour guide? I would have never guessed! That’s brilliant!”
“Yeah, it’s a pretty great job. Last summer was…” I was drawing a blank. “Last summer was…” I could not picture a moment of last summer. A small irritating pain began to form behind my right eye. I rubbed my eyes instinctively and scrunched up my eyebrows and forehead.
“Are you okay, Ava?” I felt Adam’s fingers on top of my left hand, which was resting on the table top.
“Yeah, sorry. Sometimes I get these weird headaches. They come on out of nowhere.” It was a complete lie, but I didn’t have a plausible way to explain what I was going through. I stared at Adam’s hand, which was still lying on top of mine. He followed my stare and moved it quickly.
“I think I better head home and lay down for awhile.”
What was happening to me?
“Right, right. I hope you feel better soon. Oh, and don’t forget to stop by the booth tomorrow at the football game if you’re feeling better. I’ll be looking for you.”
His smile was warm and friendly. Maybe he was a rare breed of frat.
Then again, perhaps he just wanted to try to sleep with me.
“Okay. Bye, Adam.” I started to pack up my textbook and things, wondering what to think.
“Cheerio, Ava.” He grabbed his books off the table nearby and headed out the side door.
Clearly he had interest in me, but a frat boy? I didn’t think I wanted to go there. The partying, drinking, and promiscuous sex was seriously not for me. And he was an exchange student! I thought I would find the man I was going to marry in college, and I had no plans to move across the pond for the rest of my life. He did seem like someone fun to hang out with, though. Perhaps I’d find a permanent spo
t for him over on my friend list.
Chapter Five
I got up extra early Saturday morning and spent three hours working on schoolwork. I had to stay on top of my assignments knowing that I wanted to go to the football game later.
“You ready, Ava?” Kasie asked as she knocked on my partially opened door.
I closed my history book and happily set my pen down. “Yeah. I need a break.”
Kasie entered my room holding a homemade purple scrunchie.
“What is that?” I asked.
“It’s for your hair, silly! Come on, we’re all getting ready in the living room.” I followed Kasie out of my room and found my friends all decked out in Pointer purple, doing each other’s hair and makeup.
Kasie, with sorority spirit running through her blood, made us all wear face paint and added the homemade purple scrunchies to our hair. We looked seriously ridiculous, but Kasie assured us we would fit right in when we got to the game.
We walked the short few blocks over to Gerke Field and waited in line to show our student IDs. Before we even got through to the field, I spotted Adam. He was standing at the Theta Sig fifty-fifty raffle booth, as promised, right near the front gate. I couldn’t even get through before he left the booth and over enthusiastically ran to me.
“Hey Ava!” he yelled, and then stopped suddenly, dropping his voice a little. “Wow. You are…drenched in school spirit.”
Great. We did look ridiculous. My cheeks turned pink with embarrassment. “Yeah, it’s all Kasie’s fault.” I turned to Kasie and she stuck out her hand to shake Adam’s.
“Adam, right? I saw you were recently added to the Theta Sig roster. I’m a Delta Nu.”
“My pleasure, Kasie.”
“And these are my other roommates, Elaina and Sharon.”
“Hello ladies! Anyone up for a raffle ticket?”
Kasie said she’d buy a few, so we all walked over to the booth. When we got there Adam introduced me to his friends as the girl who smacked him in the face with a calculator.
“Nice one, Ava! Someone had to put our little Brit in his place!” One of the hot frat boys pinched Adam’s cheeks as he spoke the way a grandma might do to a little child. Adam quickly swatted the guy’s hands away as a tiny bit of pink showed up on his face. It was kind of cute.
Soon the band blasted our school song as the football players ran onto the field. Cheerleaders jumped and yelled, waving their pompoms on the track outlining the grassy field. The bleachers were filled with students soaked in Pointer pride and the air was electric with school spirit. I suddenly didn’t feel so ridiculous in my getup.
“See ladies? I told you we look awesome!” Kasie led us up the broad metal stairs to some bleacher seats in the middle of the stands, then turned and screamed obnoxiously over our heads, “Go Pointers!”
“I love Adam’s accent, and he’s pretty cute,” Elaina said, hinting at the obvious. “Don’t you think so, Ava?”
I shrugged my shoulders. The truth was I didn’t know how I really felt about Adam. I had just met him. Plus I just didn’t feel like a relationship was that high on my priority list right now. And there was some strange force in my brain telling me that I had to focus on my grades. Was it this year that I could get into the School of Education?
Sharon jumped in when I didn’t take the gossip bait. “So are you going to date him?”
“I don’t think so.” They stared at me in disbelief. “I don’t like him that way.” No one said anything for half a minute. “What?” I asked, as their silence burned my ears.
“Fine, I’ll say it,” Kasie said. “Ava, you’re crazy. That man is adorable!”
Unexpectedly, the announcer came over the loudspeaker to declare the start of the game and introduce the players, saving me from dodging any more questions.
Why did my friends want me to date Adam so badly?
It was an exciting football game, but as much as I tried not to, I found myself thinking about Adam most of the time. Were my friends seeing something I wasn’t? I involuntarily glanced back at the booth several times to see what he was doing, but each time I made sure to turn back around quickly. I didn’t want to get caught by my friends—they’d heckle me for sure.
Before the game ended Adam found me up in the stands and sat down to chat for a few minutes. My roommates thought his accent was completely charming and spent most of the time asking him to say certain words so they could hear them with his accent and laugh. Adam was a great sport about it all.
“Well, I should get back to the booth before the game ends. We’ll have to tidy up.” Adam stood.
“Wait, I’ll walk with you. I have to use the bathroom anyway.” I followed Adam down the stairs and across the bleachers. He stopped at the bottom so we could walk together.
“Did you know I played football at University in Greenwich?” He kicked a rock with his left foot.
“You did?” We walked along the chain link fence separating the field from the bleacher area.
“I did. But football is played a lot differently in Europe.”
“What you call football is what we call soccer, right?”
“Exactly.” We were almost to the bathrooms. “You are one smart cookie, Ava.”
“Thanks, but I don’t always feel like it. I have a crazy Bio exam on Monday and I’m doomed to epically fail.”
“Biology? I’m a pro. Can I help you study?”
“Actually, that sounds nice. Are you doing anything later today? We could meet at the library.”
“Yeah, let’s give it a go.” I detected a hint of excitement behind his eyes. “I’ll see you in the lobby around four?”
“Thanks so much, Adam. You’re awesome!”
Adam laughed.
“What?”
“That is the most ridiculous and overused American word.” I smiled at him, waved good-bye, and then turned into the ladies’ room.
* * * *
On the walk home my roommates and I ran into a friend that used to live across the hall from us in the dorms. She was holding hands and making googly eyes at some guy walking with her. I could almost see little pink hearts floating up from their heads.
“Hey, Molly!” Kasie yelled.
The brown-haired beauty turned toward the sound. “Hey, ladies! How’s it going? Oh, I should introduce you to my boyfriend. This is Nolan Williams.”
Nolan? Nolan…where have I heard that name before?
My brain suddenly flashed an image of a very handsome dark haired man with the most beautiful blue eyes I’d ever seen. Then he was gone as quickly as he was there.
No! Come back! Who is that?
My heart felt like it stopped beating. I put my hand on my chest and my breathing sped up. I thought I might collapse, so I bent over and put my hands on my knees, waiting for my lunch to make a second appearance right there on the sidewalk.
My head throbbed like someone had whacked my skull with a baseball bat. “Ow! My head!”
All at once everyone was all around me and I was lowered to the ground, Elaina letting my head lay in her lap.
“Ava! What’s wrong? Is it a headache?”
“Do you know who we are?”
“What is today’s date?”
The whole group bombarded me with questions as if I had gotten tackled by a linebacker.
“Wait! Wait! Stop freaking out! I’m fine!” I sat up slowly and faced a crowd of concerned eyes, my headache subsiding a little.
Out of nowhere, Adam pushed his way through the crowd and was somehow there next to me on the sidewalk. “Ava, tell me exactly what happened,” he said calmly, grabbing my hand. “Are you alright?”
“Adam?” I said, my cheeks flushed. “Where did you come from?”
“I saw you go down.” He looked deep into my eyes, concerned. “How do you feel?”
“Completely embarrassed,” I said quietly.
Adam put two fingers on my wrist and looked at his watch.
“What are you doing?” El
aina asked. “Are you a Med student or something?”
Adam dropped my hand instantly. “Oh, I don’t know. They always do that on TV. I just…nevermind.”
“Sorry, everyone. I’m fine,” I sat up slowly. “I just had a quick moment of nausea. I just need to sip some water and lay down at home.”
Adam hooked his arm under mine and helped me up. I really did feel better, except for the fact that I craved the beautiful face from my vision to fill my mind again.
“If your head continues to hurt, make sure to take something for it.” Adam administered some fatherly advice. “Stay hydrated this afternoon. It’ll, um, help your headache. I’ll see you later at the library, if you’re up to it.”
“Thanks, Adam.”
“Here,” he put his hand out, palm up, “let me punch in my number in case you need to cancel.”
I handed my phone to Adam.
“I hope you’re feeling better so we can get together later,” he said, while typing on my phone. “But if not, no worries. You might need your rest. See ya, Ava.”
My friends were incredibly silent on the rest of the walk home. I knew they were all worried about me, and to be honest I was starting to get worried, too. What was going on with my head?
When we got home I was feeling much better, but decided to lie down for a while anyway before I had to meet Adam at the library. A short nap would make me feel brand new, I was hoping. I got myself a glass of water and then set the alarm on my phone just in case I did fall asleep.
A few deep, cleansing breaths and the dark room helped to relax me. In the silence, I tried so hard to pull that beautiful man’s face back to the front of my mind, but I just couldn’t get it. I felt it stuck stubbornly far back in my brain, not wanting to move to the front of the filing cabinet. I tried hard to focus on any part of his face, his hair, his neck…but it seemed like right when I focused in on a detail, it faded quickly away.
