by Jaden Wilkes
It was an old poem, one he’d learned long ago while taking English lessons.
It was appropriate now, for he would stay with her and guard her until they were safe.
Until they could both sleep, in each other’s arms, their bodies lining up perfectly and their hearts fluttering against each other in silent protest.
*****
“She’s got a month to go,” Boian said, still wearing a look of incredulous surprise. They’d been back in Bucharest for two days, and Dimitri wondered if the news of his pending fatherhood would ever sink in.
“I know, I’m fucking huge,” Ioana said and laughed.
They were seated at an outdoor patio in a fine restaurant Boian had some part of. What part, Dimitri never knew and he didn’t ask.
Columbia looked up from her plate of grilled lamb and spiced potatoes and said, “I think you look amazing, and you should savour every moment of it.”
“I do,” Ioana said and looked at Columbia with sadness, touched her hand and smiled.
“I know you do,” Columbia replied, “I think you know how lucky you are.”
“I do,” Ioana said and picked up her glass of sparkling water. “Let’s make a toast, to survivors and forgiving stupid mistakes.” She glanced at Boian, and he leaned over to kiss her.
“Always,” he said, his eyes not breaking from hers, “I will forgive you for anything, always, my love.”
Dimitri held his glass of wine to Columbia’s and winked at her. She smiled and blushed, from the naked display of affection between Boian and Ioana, or from something else, he couldn’t be sure. Since she’d been back, he had the distinct feeling she was keeping something from him, but he hadn’t pressed her about it. He wanted her to open up on her own.
“I’ll drink to anything,” Iryna said, and clinked her glass against everyone’s. “I’ll drink to survival and finding my uncle and his beautiful girlfriend. And to new friends,” she added and looked at Ioana. “And to old ones,” she continued and tapped Nico’s glass. Dimitri thought he saw a heated look pass between them, but it was gone so fast, he couldn’t pin point it.
Had everyone changed in the days since they’d gotten back?
“To my little dove,” he added and tapped his glass to Columbia’s. “I’ll never let you go.”
“I’ll never leave,” she said and this time leaned towards him for a kiss. He wrapped his hand behind her head, went to grab a fistful of hair as he’d done a thousand times, and felt her wince and pull away slightly. He loosened his grip and kissed her anyways.
They pulled apart and she looked down, ashamed. Perhaps her reactions embarrassed her, she’d withdrawn so far into herself.
Three couples, or not couples, he wasn’t sure what Nico and Iryna were yet…if anything. Six people total, and he felt alone. He wanted that connection back with Columbia, but didn’t know how to approach it. Her distant gaze and downcast eyes kept him at arm’s length.
They still hadn’t fucked. Only he didn’t know if they would fuck anymore, would it bring too much up? Should he be softer with her, call it making love?
She said she hadn’t been raped, not that he’d asked. He’d already decided it didn’t matter while she’d been away. But she gave off a cool vibe, like she wanted to be left alone.
He’d rescued her, but he couldn’t save her. He didn’t know what to do.
He reached for her hand and she didn’t pull away. He kept it in his and just held her, touched her, and felt connected to her as the six of them talked and laughed and celebrated their survival and safety.
Later that night, they were in bed and Columbia was sleeping. They were to fly back to Malta in the morning, and Dimitri was overcome with sorrow for everything that had been lost in two weeks. Two short weeks had damaged his beautiful girl beyond his control.
He leaned into her, pressed his body against her and waited for her to roll back so she was settled in his arms.
She didn’t move, she was so deep in sleep she might not feel him behind her.
He touched her, ran his hand along the sharp ridges of her ribcage, to the jutting edges of her collarbone, to her angled hips.
The landscape of her body had changed as much as the landscape of her heart.
He lay beside her and listened to her breathe, kept his hand on her waist and allowed the anguish of his failure to wash over him.
Just as he was about to drift off, she took a deep breath, exhaled, murmured his name and rolled back against him.
His heart soared and he wrapped his arms around her, felt her settle in against him, and he smiled against the back of her neck.
She was his again.
CHAPTER THIRTY
IOANA
She’d curled up on Boian’s lap and wouldn’t leave until the helicopter set down on the rooftop of a hotel in Bucharest.
Ioana still didn’t believe this was real, she couldn’t believe that he had come for her.
She’d heard the huge bang in her cell and wondered what it was, but had gone back to sleep once she’s realized it was nothing to do with her.
When her door had opened, she’d steeled her spine and prepared herself for the next round of horrors the men had planned.
But it had been him, her Boian.
He was taller than she remembered him, and much more handsome than he’d become in her memories. She didn’t know why, her images of him had become so fogged that she almost hadn’t recognized him.
But he’d smiled, and spoken her name, and she’d almost collapsed in joy and sheer exhaustion.
They’d made it out to the helicopters, past Iryna and miraculously, Iryna’s uncle.
Boian told her he’d go over it all when they were home, when he was sure she wasn’t about to give birth, when it had all sunk in that he was going to be a father.
They were now safely at home, in their underground kingdom, and Albu was checking her over. Another miracle, she seemed to have survived everything with just some bruises and scrapes that would heal. Their baby’s heart was strong and it had stayed safe inside of her in spite of all the abuse.
The emotional wounds would take longer to heal, but she knew she would get there eventually. She was Romanian after all, practical and not set to flights of anxiety or self-obsession.
She felt a twinge in her stomach and gasped. He sat up straight in his chair, leaned over and petted her hair.
“What is it?” he asked. His voice was filled with fear and wonder, it made her laugh. Her confident, cold blooded killer dropping to his knees every time she made a noise. He was protective of their child; it made her heart swell with pride.
“Nothing, just a cramp.”
“It’s normal, Boian, don’t piss yourself every time she farts,” Albu said with a dismissive wave of his hand. “It’s embarrassing for all of us.”
Boian ignored him and held her hand; he was so adorable, fussing over her every need the.
She had been so wrong, leaving him, thinking his leadership would be hard on their baby.
He was the safest person for them to be around, they would be protected by hundreds, if not thousands, of devoted followers.
She’d been so stupid, so blind and so wrong.
She just thanked God that she hadn’t been punished for it with her life…or that of her baby’s.
*****
They were curled in the dark, entwined in each other’s limbs, and he was obsessively touching her stomach.
“I think it’s a boy, did you feel that last kick?” Boian said and nudged the bulge on the side of her swelling belly.
“Don’t bother it,” Ioana said and laughed, slapping his hand away. “You just wait until she’s here, you’ll regret ever wanting her to wake up.”
“I’ll never regret spending a single moment…with him,” he replied. She could sense his smile in the dark, knew his eyes would be bright with humour and love for her, for their family.
She stretched and untangled herself from him. She rolled over and
moved to leave the bed.
“Where are you going?”
“I have to pee,” she said and could almost feel the roll of his eyes behind her back. “You just let a baby play bouncy bouncy on your bladder and see how long you last. While I’m busy, could you go get me something to eat? Fresh peaches maybe, or at least an apple.”
Since being back, food had taken on an almost religious quality. Her mouth salivated over fresh fruit, she felt savage whenever she ate, devouring them with juices running of her chin.
She made her way to the toilets, finished her business and went back to their room. Boian had gone out of his way to furnish a larger space for them, complete with a plush king sized bed and beautiful antiques offered up by one of the clients they protected.
Once inside she momentarily blinded by the lights of candles, hundreds of them lit up, warming the place and illuminating it with a soft light.
“Oh,” she whispered, “was I gone that long?”
“I had it planned,” he said and patted the bed next to him. He held out a bowl of fruit and let her eat. She felt him watching her and was struck with how ridiculous she must look. Her great, huge body, her hunger for the peach and her wild tangled hair. It wouldn’t go back to normal since she’d been back.
“I look like a cavewoman,” she said, peach juice dribbling down her chin. He leaned towards her and kissed her lips, softly, as if for the first time.
She remembered what it had been like to be with him, how gentle he always was. He was the opposite of any of the men before him, and any of the men since.
She kissed him back, but didn’t know where she wanted this to go, she was so scared he would turn her away if he knew how many men had been there.
He reached for her, touched her breast and squeezed her nipple softly. She moaned to feel it, her breasts were so swollen with milk lately, and she sought the release.
He licked the juice off her chin and smiled up at her. She sighed and set the peach back in the bowl, accepting her growing need…wanting this.
He licked her neck and nibbled the soft curve at the base of her jawline, the place only he had ever found.
He moved lower and opened the front of her nightgown, the one she’d almost cried in when she’d put it on. She looked so much like her own old, fat mother when she’d worn it for the first time.
He pulled it off her shoulders and she felt the heat from his body adding to the heat of the room. He traced a jagged scar along her shoulder and said, “I don’t remember this one.”
“I got it–” She had wanted to say she got it when they were torturing her in some place a couple months ago, when one of the men had gotten it into his head to cut her. She wanted to tell him, but she couldn’t. She was so afraid.
“When are you going to tell me what happened to you?” he asked and kissed her new scar.
“I don’t know if I ever will,” she said and ran her hands through his thick hair, “and I’m afraid you’ll have to be okay with that.”
“I’m okay with anything you need, beautiful girl,” he said and took her nipple into his mouth.
She felt a tingling, like an itch inside her breast. She watched him suckle her and became enflamed with desire. The sensation was unlike anything she’d ever experienced.
He pulled back suddenly, and a small spray of milk followed him.
“Oh my god,” she said and tried to cover herself, pull her nightgown together.
“Don’t,” he said and moved towards her breast again. “I love it.”
She laid back and let him crawl beside her, touch her stomach and drink her milk. His hand moved lower and found her clit as he sucked, he brought her to orgasm and she surprised them both by expelling milk from each nipple with a shudder and a scream.
He pulled his hand back out of her pussy and licked his fingers, smiled and said, “That was incredible. You taste incredible.”
She wiggled against him, her belly always in the way, but somehow they managed to work around it. He pushed her hands above her head and she had a moment of panic when she closed her eyes, but upon opening them she saw his face, his piercing eyes and strong Roman nose.
Her body ached with how much she loved him.
She broke free from his grasp and reached for his cock, she’d missed it and hadn’t realized it until now. He made his own gasping noise when she found it and started to stroke. None of the men who’d used her were ever this big, never even close.
That made her proud somehow, as if he could club them to death with his gigantic member.
“What are you smiling about?” he asked and thrust himself against her hand.
“About how much I love you,” she said and rolled him onto his back.
She climbed aboard, straddled him and sunk his cock deep inside of her.
“The baby?” he questioned, not wanting to hurt his child.
“She’s tucked away, far from us,” Ioana replied, “I need this Boian, I need you so bad. I need to feel real again. Please…”
Never one to say no to his one and only love, he took her to their secret places, the places only shared by them, the places where none of the men who abused her could ever touch.
He took her home.
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
COLUMBIA
She didn’t know what was wrong. She should be happy, she should be overjoyed, but she wasn’t.
It felt grey since they’d come back to Malta. Everything she’d once loved felt foreign and jangled to her. Their home felt like an endless twisting corridor and she’d gotten lost more than a couple times. Dimitri’s presence annoyed her occasionally, and she knew that wasn’t like her.
She’d finally lost her mind on her mother, tired of the constant whining and need for more…and blame. She couldn’t take it anymore and ended up slamming the phone down and contacting a lawyer in Vancouver to see about Eden’s emancipation.
Within the year, her little sister would be living with them full time.
She loved having Iryna around; the girl was bubbly and full of life and kept Columbia from falling into a great pit of despair.
She didn’t know why the pit was even there though; everything should be back to normal.
She hadn’t been with Dimitri since her return. At first she’d pleaded fatigue and injury. But her foot and ribs had healed, and her body was returning back to normal. It had been a month, and they’d had no sex. Six weeks if you included her two weeks in captivity.
She hadn’t been able to keep her hands off him before her abduction.
Now she curled over and hid herself if he walked in on her naked.
She hated it.
She was sunning herself by the pool at the moment, and pondering how she was ever going to feel normal again when Nico approached.
“We need to talk,” he said.
She cringed, wondering if this would be the declaration of love that she would have to rebuke. The longing expressed at last.
“Sit down,” she said and he joined her, stretching out on the teak chaise next to hers. “What’s up?”
“He needs you,” Nico said. Columbia was taken aback; this wasn’t what she expected from him at all.
“I know, and I need him.”
“No, he needs you. I don’t think you understand what he went through when you were gone. He almost went back to…his old self. You’ve done something to him, Col. And he needs you.”
“He changed me too,” she said, “but something happened when I was gone. Something terrible and that changed me even more. I don’t know how to get back from it.”
“Have you talked to him about it?”
“No. I’m afraid.”
“You need to talk to him. It’s obvious you two need each other.” Nico reached over and patted her arm, a completely fraternal gesture with none of the underlying emotion he used to possess when they were together.
Perhaps many things had changed, and for this particular one, she was pleased.
“I will,” she
said and sat up. He withdrew his hand and stood.
“Promise?” he asked.
She looked up, blinked in the bright afternoon sun and said, “I promise.”
He seemed satisfied at that; he left her alone to once again ponder how she’d come to be like this.
She knew it was the baby. It haunted her; she couldn’t get that sensation out of her mind, her uterus cramping and expelling their precious little seed. The flattened, wet tissue she’d felt on the blanket.
She should have done something more than discard the remains of her fetus.
She should have cared, she should have honoured it, she should have done more to prevent it from happening.
From speaking with Ioana, she’d learned the girl had suffered her own guilt at leaving Boian. She’d almost lost her baby because of it, and Boian had clearly forgiven her. She smiled to herself, she’d never really had female friends before and now she counted both Iryna and Ioana as such.
She couldn’t handle being around Ioana for long, knowing the other woman would be giving birth and enjoying her new family.
She wasn’t exactly jealous, but it brought up bitter bile in the back of her throat and a red wash of shame that she still hadn’t told Dimitri.
Nico was right though. If she wanted to get back to who she was, who she became with Dimi, she had to tell him. She wanted to want him, wanted to fuck him without a care in the world, wanted to fight and tumble around in the sand, feel his body and his love every place she turned.
She stood up and stretched. A couple of the girls they’d rescued from Mace’s dungeon were approaching the pool. They were giggling and talking loudly until they saw her. They averted their eyes and went silent as she walked towards them.
“It’s a beautiful day for a swim,” she said and they both looked up, relieved. She couldn’t help them get past the fact that she was the lady of the house, but not their owner. They would have to work through that on their own.
It made sense though; she had been more like a ghost in the halls of her mansion, drifting in and out of everybody’s days.
