“No. You’re right.” To calm her nerves, she ran a hand over her skirts. “I was fully aware of the circumstances and needs you have from the marriage.”
“That being said…” he closed the gap between them. “You’re a beautiful woman, and I fully intend to consummate this marriage.”
His lips crashed down upon hers and he pulled her close. He devoured her mouth.
And she craved it. It’s been so long since a man has kissed me and Robert never kissed me like this.
He finally broke the kiss, but still held her in his embrace.
She opened her eyes. Weak in the knees, she took a deep breath and regained her composure. “Am I now supposed to swoon? I’ve been kissed by a man before.”
“Not like that you haven’t. I can see that fact on your face. You’re as attracted to me as I am to you.” His gaze narrowed. “You want more children, don’t you, Nellie?”
She lowered her gaze. “Yes, I do. Eventually.”
“Only one way to get them.”
“I know.” She fought to control her breathing, to remain as aloof as he was.
His knuckle grazed her cheek. “Eventually, I’ll give them to you.”
“Eventually,” she retorted, lifting her chin, “I may let you but not anytime soon and you won’t take me by force. I don’t believe you’re that kind of man.”
He cupped her cheek then lowered his hand to her neck and rubbed up and down the side with his thumb. “Ah, but you don’t know what kind of man I am.” He lowered his head to hers, “You don’t know,” he whispered against her lips, “how much I’ll dare.” Again he claimed her lips. Hungry and firm, but gentle, he took her with him. When he broke the kiss, he rested his forehead against hers.
With a jolt of surprise, she found her arms around the back of his neck.
Pulling out of her embrace, he touched her burning lips with his finger.
“So beautiful.”
He walked to the door, turned back and winked. Then, smiling, he left the room.
Heart beating like she’d run a race, Nellie stood there staring after him for about a second, wondering what she had just started. Then she huffed and walked back through the connecting doors to her rooms.
Bertha was hanging Nellie’s dresses when she came back into the dressing room on her way to the bedroom.
“How are the children?” With a surreptitious move, Nellie patted her hair to be sure it remained in her bun.
“They’re fine. Henry, bless him, is keeping Violet occupied with a game of hide and seek,” responded Bertha.
“I guess we’d better find their rooms. Blake said the nursery is across the hall. Let’s go explore.”
*****
Blake left her fuming—he seen that by the jut of her chin and the flash in her eyes. He grinned. Nellie was so much more than he expected. She was beautiful, feisty and caring. Her children were clearly the most important people in her life. Understandable. He found himself already charmed by little Violet. He’d never thought of himself as a father, but Violet brought out protective instincts in him he hadn’t felt before. And a spark of unexpected longing for a family, a real family of his own.
He went into the library and to the sideboard where his brandy sat. About to pour himself two fingers, he thought better of the action. He needed a clear head to deal with Nellie. He smiled.
A knock sounded and James opened the door.
“Miss Madeline Singer is here to see you, sir,” said the butler.
“Now, James, you don’t need to announce me. Why I practically live here.”
A tall, dark-haired woman sashayed past James.
Blake’s gaze darted to the door behind her to see if she’d been seen. “You don’t practically live here, you’ve never practically lived here. Maddie, what do you want? I told you not to come here anymore.”
“Now, love, I know you didn’t mean it. Besides, I need to meet the new Mrs. Malone.” Sarcasm dripped from her like the strands of pearls she wore. Pearls he’d bought her.
“No, you don’t. We just got married today. For God sakes, give me a chance to win her over. You know how important my business deal is.”
Sashaying her hips, she walked up to him and wrapped her arms around his neck. “Dearest, I’ve gone along with this plan for your sake, but don’t you think the little wife needs to know where she stands right away?”
Grimacing, he took her arms from around his neck and placed them at her sides. “I’ll decide when she needs to know about you. Now get out before you ruin everything. Go back to The Nugget. I’ll be in later tonight.”
Maddie, in her dark red dress, with a bodice cut low enough to make the most righteous man beg, pouted and turned away.
“I’ll see you later, darling,” she said over her shoulder.
“Later.” He nodded. “Now go.”
Blake turned his back on the door and walked to the window. That was close.
A knock sounded. “What now, James?”
“I’m sorry to bother you,” said Nellie, as she paused in the doorway. “Who was the woman I saw leaving?”
At the sound of her voice, Blake turned.
“Just a business associate.”
“She’s quite beautiful for a business associate,” said Nellie, nonchalantly.
“Miss Singer manages the girls who work in my saloon.”
Seeing Nellie in her demure pink dress after Maddie in her dramatic red and black one, was like viewing day and night. Nellie was a breath of fresh air. A breath he didn’t know he’d wanted until she walked into his life.
“I see.” She gazed around the room.
He liked this room, with its floor-to-ceiling bookshelves on one wall and a fireplace on the wall across from them. Opposite the door was a large picture window that overlooked the garden and the bay. In front of the fireplace he had two brown leather chairs with a small table between them and one of his favorite Persian rugs under the chairs.
It was a nice room, a warm room.
“Your library is quite lovely. As a matter of fact, all the rooms have been exquisite.” For a moment, she pressed her lips tight. “Did Miss Singer help you decorate?”
She was jealous! He rejoiced. This will be easier than I thought. If she’s already jealous, I’ll be able to get her in bed in no time.
“No. I hired a professional.” He walked around the desk and leaned on the edge with his arms crossed. “I wanted my home to be tasteful. Something The Nugget is not.”
“Is that your business establishment? The Nugget?” she asked as she walked along the bookshelves, reading titles and touching the rich, leather bindings. “I’d like to visit your establishment one day.”
“Absolutely not.” He flew off the desk and stood in front of Nellie.
She stopped her perusal and with widened eyes, gazed up at him. “But why? As your wife, I should know about your business. Are you trying to hide something from me?”
“I’m not hiding anything. Good women, of which you are one, do not spend their time in a saloon. There is nothing you need to know about The Nugget, except it’s a saloon where men come to spend their money. Lots of money.” He took a breath to calm the tone of his voice. “But what brings you here, Nellie? You didn’t come to talk about my decorating skills or my business associates.”
“Uh, no. Quite right.” She straightened and clasped her hands in front of her. “I was wondering which room on the third floor you want to be Henry’s.”
“Oh, yes, I quite forgot to show that one to you. Come let’s do that now.”
He walked over and put her hand through the crook of his elbow.
“Shall we?”
CHAPTER 4
They got Henry settled in a bedroom on the third floor, with a spectacular view of the bay so he could see the ships come and go. In his window was a wide seat that he could sit on and by the end of the week, he did sit for hours on end.
On most days, Violet watched with him for a while then got bored a
nd played in his room.
Nellie poked her head into his room. “Henry, it’s time for lunch, will you collect Violet, please?”
A few minutes later, he came running into Nellie’s sitting room where she was finishing a letter to her former in-laws informing them of her marriage.
“Mama, I can’t find her.”
Frowning, Nellie turned to him. “What do you mean you can’t find her? She was in your room this morning.”
He started to cry. “I didn’t watch her like I should.”
Nellie took him in her arms. “Shh. It’s not your fault. It’s mine. I’m responsible for keeping track of Violet. She’s in the house somewhere and we’ll find her.” She smoothed a hand over his back. “I’ll get Blake. He’s still home. Don’t worry.” She nudged his chin up with her finger-tips. “You okay?”
He sniffled and nodded.
“All right. Let’s find your sister. You check all the places she normally hides.”
He wiped his eyes with the back of his hands and ran out of the room.
Worry hurrying her steps, Nellie ran down to the library and burst in without knocking. “We’ve lost her.”
He looked up from his desk. “Nellie, calm yourself. You’ve lost who?”
“Violet. We’ve lost Violet!”
Blake stood and pulled the cord on the wall in front of the bookshelves. Then he came to Nellie and took her in his arms. “It’s alright. We’ll find her. She can’t have gotten far.”
A few moments passed and then James opened the door.
Nellie lurched out of Blake’s arms and wrapped her arms across her middle.
“Violet has wandered off.” Blake said to James. “Get the staff searching for her. All of the staff. We’ll check our bedrooms and the nursery. Everyone reconvene in the kitchen in one hour.”
“Yes, sir,” He turned to go and then turned back to Nellie.” Don’t worry ma’am. We’ll find the little moppet.”
“Thank you, James.”
When they were alone, Blake said, “You check your rooms. Check everywhere. Under the bed, the settee, any place she can crawl into. Behind drapes, in between your dresses. Anywhere. I’ll do the same in mine. Get Bertha into the nursery. Now let’s go.”
Together, they ran up the stairs. Nellie lifted her skirts and followed Blake, taking the stairs two at a time. They turned and ran down the long hall that led to the bedrooms. Frantic, she checked under the bed, behind the drapes. Nothing.
“Violet,” she called. No response. Then she went to the sitting room and did the same. Checked everywhere Violet could hide. Called her name. Nothing. Last was the dressing room. She’d just started checking through her dresses, when she heard the door from Blake’s room open. He stood there with a sleeping Violet tight against his chest. He looked so very big cradling her baby like she was his.
“Where?” she asked.
“In my room on one of the chairs in front of the fireplace. I guess she was playing hide and seek and fell asleep.”
Nellie held out her arms for Violet. For a moment she thought he would deny her.
But he simply kissed Violet on the forehead and placed the sleeping child in Nellie’s waiting arms.
“Thank you,” said Nellie, not looking up but at her baby. Then she raised her gaze, knowing there were tears in her eyes. “Thank you for finding her.”
Blake grazed his knuckle down her cheek, then caught a tear that rolled down her face.
“Here now, no need to cry. We found the baby and she’s fine.”
“I know. It’s just…” Nellie closed her eyes and shook her head. “It’s nothing.”
“No,” he said blotting her tears with his snowy-white handkerchief. “It’s not nothing if the problem makes you cry.”
She took a deep breath. “Everything is so new and I don’t know what you want from me and…” she stopped and closed her eyes against his knowing ones. “Like I told you, it’s nothing.”
“Come to my library when you’re done putting our little wanderer down for a nap.” He rested a hand on her shoulder and squeezed. “I’ll let James know we’ve found her and the staff can get back to their duties.”
Nellie nodded and turned away, headed to the nursery.
She found Bertha pacing in the sitting room.
The older woman looked up when Nellie entered carrying Violet.
“You found her.”
“Shh, she’s sleeping. Blake found her in one of the chairs in his room.”
“Blimey, what was she doing in there?”
“Probably playing hide and seek. I’m going to have a talking-to with her when she wakes, but for now, let her sleep.”
Nellie walked across the hall to the nursery.
Bertha turned down the covers on Violet’s bed and Nellie laid her on it and covered her up.
“Poor little tyke.” Bertha smoothed the edge of the blanket. “She’s just plumb wore out.”
“Hiding for so long does that to a person,” said Nellie with a smile. “I’m talking to Blake. You and Henry go to luncheon and eat. I find I don’t have much of an appetite.”
Bertha nodded and left to collect Henry.
After a last look at her sleeping child, Nellie made her way back to the library and knocked on the door.
“Enter.”
She went in and closed the door behind her.
“Lock the door, Nellie. We have some things to discuss and I don’t want to be disturbed.”
She took a deep breath, nodded and turned the lock on the door. When she turned back to the room, she saw that Blake stood a mere two feet away.
He held out his hand. “Come with me.”
Curious about his intentions, she put her hand in his and allowed him to lead her to the settee.
Nellie sat and placed her hands in her lap.
Blake sat right next to her, his leg touching hers through her dress.
“I’m glad we found Violet. I don’t like seeing you so upset.”
The words were soft-spoken whispers on her neck.
She stiffened.
“But I don’t want to discuss Violet,” he murmured, “except to ask why she’s been sleeping in your bed at night?”
He kissed her neck and behind her ear.
She shivered. Nellie pulled away, her gaze snapped to his.
“How…how do you know she’s been sleeping with me?”
He smiled and ran a finger over the back of her hand.
“I told you I wanted to consummate this marriage, and I have tried, several times. And each time, I found Violet in your bed. Now tell me, why is that?”
Nellie felt the heat rise up her neck so fast. Her cheeks fairly blazed.
“She was afraid.”
He quirked an eyebrow. “She was afraid or you were afraid?”
Feeling guilty at being caught, she knew her cheeks flamed.
Her gaze dropped to her hands in her lap. “I was. I had her sleep with me, in case you wanted to…”
“Oh, I want to. Make no mistake about that.”
With a gentle move, he took her right hand and brought it to his lips turned it over and kissed the inside of her wrist, then licked, slowly, from her wrist to the tip of her middle finger.
The sensation left her panting, but she fought her reaction. Robert had never made her feel like this. All he did before the act was give her pain.
“You want it, too. I can tell.”
“No. I don’t. I…” she was breathless and couldn’t find the words to express herself.
Blake’s lips were on her neck, kissing hot lines up and down and all over. His hand was on her buttons on the front of her blouse and before she knew it, he was inside her chemise, pinching her nipple with his clever fingers.
“Beautiful.”
The words scorched her neck and his fingers sent waves of longing she hadn’t ever felt. Robert. Again Robert intruded. She pulled away. Ice water couldn’t have cooled her off faster than her late husband’s ghost.
/> She hung her head. “I’m sorry, I can’t.”
“Nellie. What’s wrong? You’re a passionate woman,” He skimmed his fingers across her neck. “Why do you pull away from me?”
Her fingers fumbled with her buttons and then she faced him.
“I haven’t been with a man for a long, long time. Since before Violet was born. I’m afraid…” She bit her lip and shook her head.
“Afraid you won’t remember what to do?”
He chuckled and ran a finger up her cheek then down her neck to the top of her breast. He caressed her through her blouse.
“You want me, Nellie. Almost, I think, as much as I want you.”
He stood and braced his arms against the fireplace, his back to her.
“You better leave now, while you still can.”
Then he turned and faced her, his arousal fully evident.
Heat flushed her skin, and she had to pull away her gaze and look at his face.
“And Nellie.”
“Yes?”
“Violet will sleep in her own bed from now on.” His gaze narrowed. “Do I make myself understood?”
She raised her chin a notch and gave a curt nod.
“Yes. Completely.”
“Good. Now go, before I change my mind.”
Nellie hurried out of the room and up the stairs to her bedroom. She closed the doors and leaned against them, her face burning.
What is the matter with me? I’ve been with a man before. Blake won’t be any different than Robert. Who am I kidding? Robert never, in all our years together, made me feel the way Blake did just now. The longing, the wanting, is like nothing I’ve known before and it scares the hell out of me. Even more than the fear of the pain. How can I want him knowing what the act will be like? Knowing that sex means pain?
*****
There was something wrong. Nellie wanted him, at least her body did. She was very responsive but she acted like a virgin who fears sex. He hadn’t seen that kind of response except in his girls that had been sexually abused. Usually raped, always beaten. For them sex meant pain, not pleasure.
Was that what was wrong with Nellie? Does she really fear me?
*****
Later that evening, Nellie put on her best nightgown. She knew Blake would come to her tonight. He’d made that fact perfectly clear. Her nerves wouldn’t let her sleep. She tried to read but couldn’t concentrate. She gave up and paced in front of the window, then sat in the window seat and watched the street, waiting for him to come home.
Nellie (The Brides of San Francisco Book 1) Page 4
