Susan entered their bedroom and slammed the door behind her, looking at her husband in surprise. “What are you doing, Jerome?”
“What you should be doing. We’re leaving. We have commitments, and I won’t allow you to cancel them on a whim.”
“A baby isn’t a whim, Jerome. We have a week. You promised. I need this week. Why are you being so awful about this? I don’t like it!”
“You know I never liked this place. You told me you didn’t like it, either. I don’t understand why all of a sudden you want to stay here. Music and I, we’re your life. Aren’t we?”
Susan stared at her husband until he looked away. “It’s the only home there is, for now. I can rest here. I’m very run-down.”
“It’s not my fault you don’t take your vitamins,” Jerome snapped.
“It’s not just a question of vitamins. We’re always eating on the run; the food is either overcooked or underdone. And I don’t get enough sleep. All we do is travel and work. I can’t keep it up. You have to understand.”
“What I understand is you should have gone for an abortion the first thing. That’s what I wanted. That’s what’s best for us.”
“For you, maybe, but not for me! I told you I don’t want any part of an abortion. I couldn’t live with myself. Listen to me, Jerome—I will never, ever get an abortion!”
Jerome’s stomach tightened into a knot. He was so angry he could barely force out the words. “You’re ruining me! Deliberately! You’re putting an unborn baby before me. You don’t love me. You never loved me!”
Susan sank onto the edge of the bed. Maybe he was right. Maybe she never really loved him. She felt confused. Then suddenly she realized Jerome always did this to her—made her feel guilty just to get his way. Well, not this time. She was a Coleman, by God, and all the Colemans had grit! “Exactly what is it you want from me, Jerome?” she asked, an edge of steel in her voice.
“Get an abortion. We’ll finish the tour. We’ll take it easy next year. I promise you we’ll take that trip to the Greek islands you’ve always wanted. I don’t think that’s too much to ask.”
“Are you interested in hearing what I want? Or what I feel is good for me and our baby? Let me tell you. I’ll finish off the tour, and if Maggie will have me, I’m coming back to Sunbridge to have our baby. I’m going to take two years off. You can continue on your own. You can go back to England or you can come home here to Sunbridge. That, Jerome, is my one and only offer. And whether we leave today or at the end of the week is not going to change my mind. Either you take it or you leave it.”
Jerome’s brain was clicking away like an overworked computer. Once he had Susan away from here, he was sure he could get her to do whatever he wanted. And he wanted Copenhagen. “It’s a deal. But I want to leave today. This evening. We can take the Concorde back. What do you say?”
What difference did it make, really? Susan thought tiredly. She’d be back in three months anyway. Pray God, Maggie would agree.
Cole swung his legs over the side of the bed and immediately fell backward. His head throbbed, his heart pounded, and bile rose in his throat. He knew he had to make it to the bathroom but couldn’t move. He rolled over and retched on the dark brown carpet. He groaned. Why in the hell had he messed with beer? He could have gotten high on a joint without a hangover. One thing he knew, he’d never make a drunk.
Had he made an ass of himself last night? Evidently, or he wouldn’t be feeling this way now. Memories of Rand and Riley floated around his buzzing head. He remembered Rand sticking him in the shower after he’d puked his guts up, while Riley had looked on. Goody-two-shoes Riley. Already he hated the little Jap and he’d only been here a day.
Cole’s head continued to throb. There was something he’d planned on doing this morning. If only he could think. He wondered why his mother hadn’t come in to check on him. She’d probably had a flying fit last night. Maybe she’d peeked in while he was asleep. He didn’t really care one way or the other.
A quiet knock sounded on the door. Cole ignored it. The knock sounded a second time. It wasn’t his mother; she’d have walked right in. When the knock sounded a third time, Cole rolled over and yelled, “Come in!” wincing at the sound of his own voice.
Riley poked his head in the door. “Are you going riding, Cole?”
“Not today I’m not. And don’t count on me for future days. I hate horses.”
Riley blinked. How could a Texan not like to ride? “Can I get you some aspirin or a glass of water?”
“No, thanks. Get out of here. I’ve got things I have to do today.”
“Cole, your mother sent me up here to get you. I wouldn’t have bothered you because I—”
“Knew I was drunk last night. Well, this morning I’m sick. I don’t care if my mother wants me or not. Tell her I’m still sleeping. That way you can be the conquering hero just like your old man.”
Riley bristled. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means whatever you want it to mean. Why are you here, anyway? How long are you staying? Who invited you?”
“My grandfather and our grandmother talked it over, and Aunt Maggie sent the official invitation. I’m to stay here as long as I want. This was my father’s home, too.” He wanted to say more, but decided against it; Cole was sick and angry enough without a fight.
“And I’ll just bet you can’t wait to get your share, right?”
“My share of what?”
“Don’t play dumb, little Jap boy. This place. Sunbridge. Well, the deed is in my mother’s name, and when she buys it, I get this place. The first thing I’ll do is sell it.”
“Cole, I don’t need a share of anything. I’m here because I never got a chance to know my father. That’s the only reason.”
“Sure, sure,” Cole muttered as he struggled to his feet. Immediately, he grabbed hold of the bedpost. “I thought I told you to get out of here!”
“I’m going. I hope you feel better later on,” Riley said, closing the door behind him.
What was he going to tell Aunt Maggie? Riley asked himself as he walked quietly down the hall. A lie was a lie no matter how you looked at it. Maybe he could stall by going back to his room for a while. He grinned. It would be worth it just to look in the floor-length mirror again. Every stitch of clothing he had on was his father’s, right down to the Jockey shorts. Everything had been preserved in plastic bags and cardboard boxes—he’d seen the cartons in his closet, all bearing his grandmother’s handwriting—then they’d been taken out, laundered, and placed in sweet-smelling drawers. He’d repacked his own things and piled his suitcases on top of the shelf. From now on he was going to wear only his father’s things.
Riley returned to his room and sat down at his father’s desk, rubbing his cheek on his shoulder. The checkered shirt gave off an aroma of cleanliness . . . and something. The same scent that lingered on the baseball hat his grandmother had brought to Japan on her first trip.
This room that had belonged to his father was so different from his room back in Tokyo. There the furniture had been Eastern, light and airy. Here the furniture was heavy Western style. He could see traces of the boy in the man’s room. The shelves in the closet held treasures he would go through when he felt the time was right. He could envision himself sitting here at the desk, using the same goosenecked lamp, poring over the same books, maybe even using some of his father’s pencils; there were enough of them in the drawer.
He wanted to charge outside and explore and investigate. On the long plane trip with Sawyer he’d fantasized about doing all kinds of things with Cole; they’d be friends, inseparable buddies. Sixteen was almost grown-up. There would be girls and they’d date, and then in the confines of their rooms they’d talk about those dates.
It wasn’t going to happen. Fantasies? Not really. The reality of his situation had hit him the moment he’d been introduced to Cole. Cole Tanner was his cousin, but he was pure trouble. And right now, trouble was something he didn
’t want to deal with.
Sighing, Riley stood up and took a last look at himself in the mirror. He couldn’t delay going downstairs any longer. Aunt Maggie had sent him to get Cole, and he’d have to tell her something. He was relieved to see Cole when he rounded the corner of the hallway. He didn’t hurry his step and wasn’t surprised when his cousin didn’t wait for him.
Riley knew his aunt Maggie thought they were together when she appeared at the foot of the stairs and watched them come down. Neither boy did anything to make her think differently.
“There you are. I was beginning to think you were going to sleep all day.” She was talking to Cole, but she turned to Riley. “Ken has your horse ready to be saddled. You might as well learn from scratch. Cole will join you soon. I want to have a cup of coffee with him first.
“Feeling a bit under the weather, are we?” Maggie said indulgently after Riley had left.
“Come off it, Mother. I’m suffering from a hangover and we both know it. Cheerfulness isn’t going to help my pounding head or my sour stomach. And let’s set the record straight right now: I’m not going riding, with or without my cousin. I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t keep shoving him at me.”
Maggie took a deep breath. Obviously it was going to be one of those mornings. “Look, Cole, you and I have quite a few things to discuss, and now is as good a time as any. That’s an order.”
The minute Martha had poured Cole’s orange juice and left, Maggie started in. “I’m very disappointed in you, Cole. I expected more from you last night. You knew how important that party was to me. How could you do that? You’re only a child!”
“I seem to recall someone saying you’d already had a baby at my age, Mother,” Cole drawled insolently.
Maggie flinched but refused to take the bait. “Cole, we have to talk. I don’t like what’s happening here. I want us to be a family. We have things that need discussing.”
“Like the way you said you’d think about allowing me to make the trip? That was just lip service, wasn’t it. You never had any intention of letting me go. Admit it!”
“I admit it,” Maggie said through clenched teeth. “I want you here at Sunbridge. You aren’t going back to military school, either. In the fall you’ll go to school right here. I’m sorry to hit you with all this when you aren’t feeling up to par, but it’s necessary.”
“No it isn’t. You like jabbing me and you know it. Why is Riley here? You never did give me a straight answer to that. Don’t get any ideas that we’re going to be best buddies, because it won’t work.”
Maggie set her coffee cup precisely in the center of her saucer. “I was hoping it would work. I was hoping you’d try because it’s important to me. Are you jealous of Riley, Cole?”
Cole snorted. “Me? Jealous of a Jap? Come on, Mother.”
“I can’t force you to like him, but I can insist you be civil. And I do insist,” she added sharply.
“Or what? You already said I can’t go on the trip. You said I’m going to the local schoolhouse, so what’s left?”
“Why are you being so difficult? Why can’t you meet me halfway? Why do we always end up at each other’s throats?”
“Why is it always my fault? You’re the one who seems to have problems with relationships,” he snapped.
“I’m getting very tired of you throwing up my past. I’m trying to get along with you. I’ve made my mistakes and I’m living with them. I don’t want the same thing to happen to you.”
“The nut doesn’t fall far from the tree. Is that what you’re saying?”
“No, that’s what you’re saying. I’m trying to prevent you from making my mistakes, and your attitude isn’t helping.”
“If you’d leveled with me from the beginning, we wouldn’t be having this discussion.”
“Would you have listened? Would you?” When Cole shrugged, Maggie continued, “As for Riley, he has as much right to be here as you and I. If his father had lived, he would have inherited Sunbridge.”
“Second best, eh, Mater?”
“Stop it, Cole! You’re not funny. Right now, you could take a few lessons in manners from your cousin.”
“I knew that was coming. He’s tall and handsome! I’m a head shorter and skinny. He looks good in his father’s clothes, and I look like a clown dressed up for Halloween. Well, you can’t make me into something I’m not, Mother.”
“I’m not trying to make you into anything. I’m trying to give you a decent home so you can put down roots. It’s important, Cole. Before, you were at school during the year and a guest in an apartment in New York for holidays. That wasn’t home. This is home!”
“Your home, Mother. It’s just a house to me. The apartment was fine. I liked New York.”
“Well, I didn’t.”
“That’s the bottom line, isn’t it. It’s what you want. It’s always what you want. You and Dad didn’t even tell me you were getting a divorce. I had to hear it from my counselor at school.”
“I wanted to tell you. Your father did, too. But your counselor thought it would be best coming from him. And unfortunately, we listened to bad advice. I’m sorry about that, but I can’t undo it.”
“I called Dad this morning.”
“You what?”
Cole laughed. “I thought that would get a rise out of you. I called Dad this morning. He’ll be here this weekend. He said he was planning on coming next week as a surprise, but he’d move it up to this weekend because he’s free.” Cole savored the look on his mother’s face, for a moment, then moved in for the kill. “He said I could come and live with him in New York if I wanted.”
Maggie managed to gather her composure. She reached for her coffee cup with trembling hands, gripping it around the middle, but she didn’t drink. “I have sole custody of you, Cole,” she said evenly. “You cannot go to New York unless I agree. I do not agree. Do you understand?”
“Dad’s a lawyer. He said he’d work it out with you.”
“There’s nothing to work out. You’re staying here.” Cole jumped up from the table. “You can’t make me into your brother or your father! That’s what you’re trying to do. You wanted to see me in a military school so I’d wear a uniform like Grandpap did. You constantly try to find a resemblance to him in me. Now you want me to play cowpoke like your brother. You want to use me to make yourself feel better.”
“That’s not true!”
“Isn’t it? Then why is Riley here? You could have said no when Grand asked you if he could come. You’re using him, too.”
Maggie brought the coffee cup to her lips. The boy’s words bothered her.
“No, Cole, you’re wrong.”
“No, Mother, I’m right.”
“I won’t argue the point. Now that you’ve told me of your father’s visit, we’ll wait till he gets here to discuss it. Meantime, you will do as I say—when I say it. I know you don’t feel up to riding, but they can use some help in the barn; so if I were you,” Maggie said, her voice firm but not unkind, “I’d get moving and get your chores done.”
Cole stared at her, mouth agape. He was about to protest, then thought better of it. He’d keep a list to present to his father. His father would understand; his father would take care of everything.
When Cole had stomped angrily out of the dining room, Maggie crumpled. Suddenly a firm hand was placed on her shoulder, and she started in surprise. “Rand!”
“I thought you handled all that very well. I’m sorry I eavesdropped, but when I heard the discussion, I didn’t want to come in and interrupt.”
“That’s all right. I guess you can see I have a problem on my hands.”
“Yes, you do. Perhaps when the boy’s father arrives, you can work something out.”
Maggie laughed bitterly. “That’s not likely to happen. Cranston didn’t give me an argument over Cole. He simply wanted nothing to do with him. He was happy to give me sole custody of the boy. We’re in the middle of divorce proceedings. For Cole to go to him . .
. It did upset me.”
“He’s no different from most kids. He’ll play both ends against the middle if he can get away with it.”
“I don’t understand. I’ve given him everything. The finest schools, the best clothes, an adequate allowance. Wonderful vacations. What more does he want?”
“That’s not exactly the question here. What he did want before—what he needed—was a family, but he was sent off to school. Admit it, Maggie. You weren’t the most attentive mother. I’m not trying to be insulting; believe me. Now you suddenly want a family. Cole is confused and he’s angry. He sees Riley as an intruder, an interloper. Somehow you’re going to have to work it out. Hopefully, Cranston will help. Parents always want what’s best for their children.”
Maggie let loose another sardonic laugh. “Time was I would have called that a bold-faced lie. I have a lot to learn, Rand. I’m still deep in the woods, but I see a patch of light.”
“That patch will get bigger and brighter. Just keep your eyes open.”
Maggie laughed. “I always do.”
Rand bit into a piece of toast. She was beautiful when she laughed.
Sawyer loved the sweet smell of hay and the pungent odor coming from the barn. Of everything on Sunbridge, this was her favorite spot. It was a large milk-white barn with apple-red trim. From here she could see the studio with its southern exposure and vast skylights. It looked so neat and tidy, so empty, its inhabitants long gone. Even some of the memories were gone. If only time could stand still, just for a little while. Time to capture the memories and make them a part of oneself, so that just by closing one’s eyes they could be relived.
Her eyes traveled lovingly to the gentle slope she had rolled down so many times to the house called Sunbridge. It was beautiful in the late-morning sunshine. Prairie pink, with the golden globe casting it in shades of light mauve and dusty rose. The windows winked at her like diamonds. There were secrets behind those panes of glass, secrets both joyful and painful, even shameful. Rand was behind one of those windows. What was he thinking?
She was startled by a noise behind her. “Cole, I didn’t know you were here.”
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