by Dara Nelson
Chapter Nine
We left the Elders in a daze, still not really believing what had just happened. Matthew started to set me down as we reached the door to his room, expecting to have to leave me now, but the guard put his hand on Matt’s shoulder and stopped him. He continued to carry me as they led us to a different room, a little farther down the hall from his. We were both confused and a little anxious as we followed them, both of us wondering why they were changing his room. We made a left then, passing the door to my room that was at the end of the hall and Matt and I both looked at each other, but we continued on. The first thing I noticed about the doors along this hallway was that they didn’t have small doors at the bottom of them to slide trays through. I felt anxious as we kept going and knew Matthew did too. The guards stopped at the second door, opened it and waited, impatiently, since Matt had slowed because he didn’t want to have to put me down. I sensed his hesitation and I traced my scar and whispered, “It’s okay, Matt. I’ll be with you always.” He closed his eyes and leaned down then to kiss me goodbye as he took the last two steps.
“I love you, Sarah,” he whispered and then I felt him gasp and I saw his eyes fly open in surprise.
I turned my head to see what he had seen and my heart soared. Was I really seeing what I was seeing? Did this really mean what I thought it meant? This room was nicely furnished with a small dining table, a soft sofa, a carpet on the floor, and, in the middle of the back wall, a comfortable bed. A bed with a canopy and flowing curtains around it. A bed with a thick goose-down comforter on it. A bed that was definitely big enough for two. Unimaginable relief flooded into me.
He crossed the threshold but looked down as he felt me tense up. “What’s wrong?” he whispered.
I managed to say, “Not yet,” through my clenched teeth and I looked at the guards. I was anxiously waiting for them to leave the room, trying to hold it together until they did. Matthew quickly understood, and he held me tighter, pressing his cheek to my forehead as he carried me towards the bed. I heard the door close as he gently placed me on the bed. Moving as close as he could, he wrapped his arms around me, and lightly kissed my face and caressed me as I tried to let go of the fears from the last few weeks. And I tried desperately to keep the pain below the love. I sobbed endlessly into his chest, instinctively wiping away the tears that I didn’t cry anymore, as he patiently waited.
I don’t know what time or day it was when I finally stopped. I had fallen into a restless, sobbing sleep but my heart soared as I realized I was in exactly the same place that I was in before. I was wrapped in Matthew’s arms with my face pressed into his chest. I looked up and saw that he was sleeping but with a deeply troubled look on his face. I took a deep breath and felt more alive as his scent filled me. I carefully stretched my legs and moved my arms a little. I was thrilled to discover that the pain was down to a dull ache. I could live with that, I thought… and I drifted off to sleep again.
When I next awoke it was with a hunger that I hadn’t felt for a while. Matthew had gently placed his hand in mine, our scars touched and I wanted him, needed him more than ever. I needed to feel good again. No more pain, no more terror, just pure pleasure. I pulled his face to mine and started kissing him, tenderly at first, working through the aches that I still felt, then harder, pressing myself into him. He hesitated. He pulled back and looked into my eyes, “Are you sure?” he whispered. “I don’t want you to hurt anymore.”
I stared hard into his eyes, “Positive,” was all I could manage to say as I pulled him down to me. I was feeling what I needed to feel, knowing that this was exactly what I needed. It was a struggle to get me where I wanted to be, where I needed to be. But I knew that he could do it. I had complete confidence in him. He slowly, tenderly, helped me work through the pain, until, finally, I felt it rolling towards me. “Kiss me,” I gasped as I was blissfully engulfed by pleasure. No more pain, justpleasure. Pure pleasure.
Several hours, and many times later, I was playfully tracing my finger down his chest, wondering and hoping that this could go on forever. He had happily, yet exhaustively, helped me get rid of the dull, aching pain… though it was now replaced with an insatiable hunger that I couldn’t seem to control right now. He turned to me with a sparkle in his eyes, “Again?” he said.
“Always,” I replied and he leaned down to kiss me but there was a knock at the door.
We both shot out of bed and were dressed in the blink of an eye. I tried not to groan as the painful ache worked its way back into me, but he could see it in my face and he came over and placed his arms around me as he helped me stand. I smiled at him and he turned to the door and mumbled, “Come in.”
A cloaked figure glided in and set a tray on the table. The evil stench hit me like a slap in the face. I wanted to, had to eliminate it and I was starving but I hesitated because Matt wasn’t moving and his arms were still wrapped around me. And these were arms that I never wanted to leave. I looked into his face, my eyes silently pleading with him, but he was staring intently at the cloaked figure, watching it. I understood then. We had to wait until he or she left the room. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to clear my head. I was new to this and hadn’t yet learned to control my thirst. I turned my face into Matthew’s chest, breathing in his scent, my ears listening for the sound of the closing door, the signal that I knew meant that I could drink.
We sat together on the sofa a few moments later, enjoying the warmth of our recent meal with our limbs entwined. Simply being near him made me feel better. And we waited. “Ummm, did we really agree to be some sort of vampire matchmaking service?” I said.
He thought about this for a moment then replied,“Well, yeah, I suppose we did, although with most dating services there isn’t the fear of death if it doesn’t work out,” he said sarcastically.
“Very true,” I replied. “But that’s why we have to be perfect at it,” I replied.
He nodded and then we grew quiet again. We assumed that the meal they had brought meant that we would be summoned soon, and our assumptions were verified quickly as the doorknob turn. We rose and followed the cloaked vampire without him having to beckon us, and went to see the Elders. We were still anxious yet somewhat intrigued now. We were almost looking forward to finding out what they had in store for us next.
Lesson #1 - Self-Control
When we walked in we saw that only one Elder was in the room, the red-headed female. She was seated at the front of the room with two chairs across from her. “My name is Penelope,” she began, “Over the next few weeks you will be receiving training from each of us.” She spokein a beautiful voice that belied her age. “You will have five different types of lessons. I am here to teach you self-control,” she said, and then a side door opened and in came two of the cloaked guards, leading a handcuffed man, a man whosehorrible evil stench assaulted my very core. My eyes grew wide and then focused only on him. I was needing to, preparing to strike, when I felt myself trying to fight this unbearable urge. I was not ready for this, I had never killed before and I sure in the hell didn’t want to now, or ever, if that was possible. Though my entire being knew that this man was unbelievably evil, had killed many and would definitely kill again unless he was stopped, I knew that killing him was more than I could or wanted to handle. I knew that, being as fragile as I was right now, so new and vulnerable, it might change me somehow. I gripped Matt’s hand and moved as close to him as possible. She stood and softly shook her head as she walked to me, “No, you have to do this on your own, child,” she softly said as she helped me stand and forced me to release Matt’s hand. My mind screamed at her,“What are you doing? He’s my anchor, don’t leave me unchained, please” but I said nothing and just stared at her wide-eyed.
For the next few minutes, her encouraging words were whispered in my ear. “He’s there and you want to consume him, but you don’t need to, Sarah. You’ll survive if you leave him alone.” Each time my eyes started to turn toward the man, her voice brought me back, helpi
ng me to focus on something other than his stench, helping me to concentrate on the other smells in the room: the damp floor, the bricks, the wood, anything I could use to help me focus. She kept going and I began to realize she was slowly backing me up, forcing me to move closer to him (NO! my mind screamed). Each step brought me closer to his stench, closer to the vein that I could hear throbbing in his neck. Each step threatened to change my focus to shift to the kill, but her words always helped me to stop. She backed me up until I was so close that I could feel his breath on my back. I knew that all I had to do was turn around and he was mine. I felt my pupils dilate. My body went tense as it anticipated the strike. I fought to stay where I was, squeezing my fists tight, trying to pull in the other scents in the room. But I knew I was losing my fight, I was going to turn and I was going to strike, I could feel it in every bone and muscle in my body. I saw it happen in my head. But in the split-second before I turned, she turned her gaze to the guard, nodded slightly and he led the man out of the room and closed the door. Relief washed through me. I gasped and bent over with my hands on my knees. My head was swimming. I began to relax slightly as she walked me back to the center of the room. I slowly regained my composure. I was just beginning to relax when I heard the door open again and I turned to see them lead in another prisoner. This time it was a woman, and (oh my God, No!), this one was worse. The things this one had done to others was killing me. It hurt me to hold back, it hurt me to not strike. I felt little relief when I heard Penelope whispering in my ear again.
We continued this many times, each time with the prisoner being led away just when I thought I couldn’t take it anymore. Just when I knew I was going to strike. I really didn’t think I was getting any better at this. Each time felt just as difficult to me. So I was horrified when, just before the tenth prisoner was brought in, she whispered something in Matt’s ear, he nodded and with a sad look on his face, he turned to me, placed his hand on my cheek and said, “I’m sorry honey, but I have to go out for a minute. I’ll be back soon, I promise.”
“No, you can’t leave me,” I whispered
“We have to, Sarah, it’s time,” he said.
“WE?!” I yelled. “NO, please no! Please don’t leave me alone in here with one of them. I won’t be able to stop myself. I am not strong enough for this. You have no idea how hard this has been. I don’t want to kill anybody. Please, don’t leave me alone in here,” I pleaded to both of them. Matt forced me to focus on his eyes.
“You are strong enough, Sarah,” he whispered. “You are stronger than anyone I’ve ever met. There is no doubt in my mind that you can do this,” he whisperedthen he leaned down and kissed me long and hard, filling my head and my heart with his love. I believed him then… until he stopped.
As he turned and walked away all my fears flooded back. My eyes darted around the room. I was completely panicking. I sat in the chair and wrapped my arms around it, thinking I would try to anchor myself until this was over, but Penelope softly shook her head and said, “The prisoner won’t leave the room until you are standing next to him.”
“You’ve got to be joking,” I said. “You want me standing right next to him? When you’re not here to stop me?”
“Sarah,” she said, “I wasn’t stopping you before, that was all you.”
“No it wasn’t,” I said. There is no way that I had been the one stopping me from killing the others, when all I wanted to do when they were in the room was kill them. A fresh wave of panic started to build as I watched her turn and glide out of the room. I jumped as I heard the side door open, then I took a deep gulp of the good, safe air that was left in the room… and waited.
The scent of this one, another male, was worse than all nine others combined. And he made things worse (how was that possible?) by speaking to me “Hey beautiful, how ‘bout coming over here and unlocking me?” I gripped the chair, closed my eyes and tried to bring Matthew’s face into my focus. I tried to remember his scent, but the face in my mind kept changing into the face of this horrible man in the room. I opened my eyes, trying to keep Matt’s loving and encouraging words in my head, and I turned to look at him… and he SMILED at me.
Anger flooded into me. I could feel that despite the fact that he was handcuffed, he was instantly thinking of me as his next victim. I clenched my fists and tried to find something else to focus on. I tried to pull some scent out of the room besides his… but I couldn’t find any. I tried to think of Matthew and how much I wanted to be with him right now, but that only made it worse because this man was the reason I wasn’t with him right now and that made me angrier. I was losing this fight, had lost this fight, I knew it. The room swam out of focus for an instant and I clenched my fists and concentrated on bringing it back, only to groan as I realized that I was now only six feet from him. I didn’t remember moving, when had I done that? I sank down into a nearby chair, feeling exhausted, knowing that I couldn’t do this anymore.
My focus returned the moment I heard him speak again, “Are you alright, darlin’? Do you need my help?” he asked… and then he took a step towards me (are you insane??? My mind screamed).
“STOP!” I hissed. I felt him grow tense. I heard his heartbeat accelerate. I saw the confused and then horrified look on his face… and I felt the tingle in my teeth, the tingle that meant my fangs were coming… I was certain then that my fight was over. I knew what would happen next.
Chapter Ten
I lay on the bed, curled up in a ball. As I felt Matthew sit down, I whispered, “Please, don’t touch me”
“But Sarah, honey, why not? I don’t understand. Are you hurting again?” he said.
“No, I’m not hurting. Don’t touch me because I’m horrible, because I’m evil and because I failed,” I sobbed.
“Failed? Failed what?” he said.
I turned to look at him, “I failed my training. I killed that horrible man.”
“Unbelievable,” he said… and then he chuckled.
That made me furious. I spun around on the bed, facing him on all fours.
“What could you possibly find funny right now?” I spit out.
His eyes were so kind as he spoke, “Sweetheart, you didn’t kill anybody and you definitely didn’t fail.”
That thoroughly confused me. I sat back and wrapped my arms around my knees.
“You’re lying,” I whispered.
“No honey, I’m not. You really didn’t kill him. I have no idea how you didn’t. No one has ever passed that final test the first time around, no one,” he shook his head in amazement and continued, “I didn’t,” he whispered.
I could only stare at him. In my mind I was trying to remember the final moments in that room, the moment after I felt the tingling in my teeth. I shook my head and tried to clear it. I forced myself to see what I was trying to block, what I thought I didn’t want to see. Now I had to know. I saw myself focused on him, crouching, springing. I saw the shock on his face as I flew through the air towards him. Then my eyes grew wide as I saw what I had done next. In the split-second before I reached him, I suddenly did a somersault, stopping myself in mid-air and gracefully landing on my feet. I was crouched down, staring at his boots that were just inches from my face. He started to regain some of his composure as I rose up to face him.
“Wow, that was impressive darlin’. You must be tons of fun in the sack,” he said, leering at me. My mind latched onto this and I felt stronger than I ever had. I knew without a doubt that death for this man would be the easy way out… and I wanted him to suffer, suffer in a way that would hurt only him. I felt elation as my fangs dropped. I slowly stood and I smiled at him, my black eyes boring into him. The color fell from his face and I heard his bladder releasing to the floor. “I know who you are, I know where you live, I will always be watching you… and you will never harm another human being again. If you do, I will kill you. Do you understand what I am saying?” I hissed. He gulped. His eyes were huge. He finally managed to nod his head, then the door behind him o
pened and he was gone.
I lifted my head to stare at Matthew. “Holy crap, Matt. I can’t believe I didn’t kill him,” I said, amazed at myself. He placed his hand on my cheek and smiled, “No you didn’t, sweetheart. But I have to ask, I have to know… how did you DO that? How in the world did you stop yourself?”
I shrugged my shoulders and said, “Honey, I’m not exactly sure.” Then I tried to explain to him what had happened.
When I finished Matthew could only shake his head and say, “You continue to prove to me that you are the most amazing person. Just when I think I couldn’t possibly love you more, you prove me wrong. To say I love you Sarah Jensen is completely inadequate, because there are no words left to describe how I feel about you.”
For a moment I could only stare at him. Finally I managed to whisper, “Wow.” Then he leaned in, kissed me… and spent the next few hours showing me the love that his words had failed to say.
Lesson #2 - Fighting Skills
We were dressed and ready for the knock on the door the next morning. We fed quickly and waited anxiously for the guard to return. We followed him out the door when he finally arrived. When we entered the room we saw one of the male Elders, the one with brown hair. We walked forward and stood facing him. I immediately noticed the room had been cleared of all chairs and tables. “I am Paolo. Today you will learn fighting skills,” his raspy voice said. I had to stifle a laugh… a fighter I never was… did they really expect me to be one now? And did they really expect me to fight this ancient, frail looking creature? But he crouched down to spring and my body instantly and instinctively prepared to defend itself. He sprung and I flung him off me before he could pounce, but he landed agilely right behind me and was quickly on my back, his hands on my head. In a real fight he would have instantly ripped my head off. He jumped off and quickly gave me some tips as he walked away from me, but he turned and sprung again so fast that I didn’t have time to react. Another quick kill shot.
