Love with Every Beat

by K. L. Shandwick

  She continued to stare at me. Unblinking. Lily was more confident than I was giving her credit for. “The song?” God, I couldn’t concentrate or tear my eyes away from her. She realized I was staring at her and covered up her body with her arms in a self-conscious way. What the hell? Surely she knew how fucking beautiful she was?

  “It’s my suggestion for your song lyric. Music is the sound of feelings, and she listened to what he felt,” she repeated looking up at my face with her big doe- like eyes. They were the most incredible light blue, and the irises were framed by a thick black ring making the color more accentuated. Incredibly sparkly as well, full of vitality. Actually, Lily was incredibly sparkly. Like some massive diamond, that could be admired on display, but would never owned because it was priceless.

  Damn. I couldn’t continue to look at her, so I looked away and as I did, her last comment tore me out of yet another revere and back into the now. “Well, shit! Where did that come from?” I was impressed, and I was already scribbling it down and replaying the song with her added words in my head to the melody, playing the music in the background. “Anon,” she said smugly.

  “A music quotation?” Glancing at her, I sang it again to myself and it was a sound choice for the lyric. I would never have found anything better. Grinning at her genuinely, I was in awe of how smart she was to think of that, and it sounded exactly what I’d been looking for. “Smart and sexy, very nice!” The thought fell out of my mouth spontaneously before I could catch it from rolling off my tongue.

  “Well the first part, ‘Music is the sound of feelings,’ I added the rest, but yup, a quotation,” she declared animatedly and dipped her leg and pulled at her pant leg, cutely. I think she was aiming for a curtsy, but she was sitting down so I couldn’t be sure. A surge of emotion almost overwhelmed me and all I wanted to do was push her on her back and demolish her with my mouth. This girl…Lily, looked so fucking ravishing.

  “How did you come up with that?” Paying full attention to what she was saying, I was intrigued and trying to encourage normal conversation. Any distraction was welcome to take my mind off my raging choked dick currently sitting on the seam of my jeans. My apa piercing was rubbing against the fabric of my boxer briefs with the constant visual stimulation and horny thoughts making it really hard to ignore.

  Lily was biting her bottom lip again, and I wondered what was going on in that pretty little head of hers. I wanted to do that to her—bite her bottom lip. A smug look came over her face, and she just kept on surprising me with her boldness. “Well, maybe if you’re persistent with your flirting you’ll find out one day.”

  Fuck. How was I supposed to resist a challenge like that from her? You did it by doing what you were doing, trying like hell to put her off. I clapped my hands together in front of her. “Good enough for me.” I laughed in an almost sinister tone and rubbed my hands in a predatory manner. “Now you have me intrigued.”

  Pretending to leer at her, I scratched my stubbly chin, and exaggerated my observation of her body. It was backfiring, the effect she had on me and my behavior was making my dick so confused—thinking it should get primed for some action, only to be quashed again moments later when my head won another battle. The war was far from over.

  Shifting my ass on the grass wasn’t working, I couldn’t get comfortable. Never had I felt so turned on by the mere sight of someone. And for the first time in my life I felt I was truly in freefall. Breathing in deeply and trying to gain more control over myself took everything I had left in that moment. There was no way I could stay sitting down. Needing to stand up, I was desperate to gain some relief from the ache in my groin.

  Chapter 3 – Sexual Tension

  Upping the ‘anti-Alfie’ campaign, I tried again to put an end to this. “Okay, Lily, now about that sex you promised me…” Smirking, I poked her in her belly playfully and pulled her up onto her feet. Grabbing both guitars and placing the straps over my shoulders, I caught her wrist, and fuck it was so slim, my fingers wrapped around my own when I took a hold of her. Before she could think, I started running with her.

  Where I was going was anyone’s guess at that point, even mine. I actually just needed to do something physical to get my dick under control, but Lily wouldn’t have known that. We ran down the grassy hill behind the campus and the momentum of the downward slope made my pace slightly too fast for her.

  She was trying to speak but her voice box was vibrating and she was asking me to stop as her feet pounded the ground beneath her. “Don’t worry. I’m not going to seduce you or anything crazy… yet.” I turned and cocked my head smiling, wanting to unnerve her even more, and she shivered.

  “So what are you doing then?” Lily asked, her voice had a nervous hesitancy about it. Her hand pushing her hair behind her ear again, and damn if it didn’t make me want to do that for her. She looked worried, and I regretted she was maybe afraid, I had wanted to put her off but I never wanted her to be frightened of me.

  Pulling at my lips not sure what to say at first, I bunched my brows until something came up. “I just wanted somewhere I could have you to myself to talk. I don’t want to be interrupted.” We had finally stopped, and I let go of her wrist. The connection and the feel of her skin had felt too fucking right. And the loss of it in my palm was noted.

  My body was dealing with a real gamut of emotions. Conflicting stuff was going on in my head like wanting to protect her. Hold her tight. Wanting to feel her arms around me, mine around her. To stroke her hair and her cheek. Bury my face in her neck. Feel her face in my neck when she smiled. All the gentle things that would let her know I was taking care of her and for me to feel she knew that.

  The alpha male in me wanted to rip off every stitch of clothing she was wearing. Feast my eyes on what I suspected was a fabulous rack under that cute little outfit. Feel my dick sinking every thick inch into her wet and swollen pussy, while she clamped down on it, gripping it from her core, and moaning in pleasure at what I was doing.

  I threw myself down on the grass, flat on my back, but this time bent my knees so that they were raised. I didn’t want her to notice how hard I still was, despite the physical activity, or to know the effect she was having on me.

  Fighting to control my breathing from the running and my feelings, I lay there quietly for a few moments trying mentally to get myself in check. I offered a smile in reassurance while I panted breathlessly.

  “No long grass lovemaking then?” she squeaked. Oh. Dear. God.

  Why was she testing me so much? Lifting my head to see her was pointless, she was standing with the sun directly behind her. So I blocked the sun with my hand, and I wondered if maybe I’d misjudged her completely. Maybe she wasn’t as innocent as she appeared to be.

  The feelers were out by then, I had to test it. “Some men do that I’ve heard, but I won’t make love to you Lily. I will thoroughly fuck you though. With your permission, of course, and maybe we’ll get a little kinky.” I wiggled my brows at her again and smiled.

  What I was really aiming for was intimidation and hoping that what I said killed this ‘thing’ going on between us off completely. “I don’t do that slow, tender shit, Lily. It’s overrated. Besides, I have other charms that will make sure you are well taken care of and sexually satisfied. By the way, has anyone ever told you how fucking gorgeous you are?”

  I was fighting a losing battle, as my words were giving mixed messages. “But I’ll try hard to keep my hands to myself…for now,” I smirked. She didn’t look perturbed at all by my comment, which kind of pissed me off. Instead, Lily giggled at me.

  “Damn, Alfie, you really know how to make a girl feel special don’t you?”

  My smirk dropped, and I stared intensely hoping to unnerve her further. Drawing in a deep breath before I spoke, I asked, “You want to feel special? Then I guess I’m not your man… but, if you want to have special feelings, then I can most certainly do this for you. ‘Friends with benefits,’ if you will.”

  My heart
was pounding in my chest. There was an ache inside the size of Texas. Almost certain I had just concluded my cordial conversation with her, I studied her reaction and prepared myself for a slap, at the very least.

  Lily shifted on her feet and tucked her hair behind her ear again before meeting my eyes, locking me in a defiant stare back. “Are you interviewing me for the position of ‘Fuck buddy’?” She wasn’t smiling, and her brow furrowed with the seriousness of the situation.

  I flashed a smile thinking now I’ve got you. My heart aching, but my head telling me I was doing the right thing—the decent thing. My proposal was preposterous, and she understood what I was asking, and I could see she didn’t like it. What woman would?

  “Ah, you are so smart, I love it. Intelligence, as well as beauty, the only thing left now is for me to be inside you to determine whether I’ve hit the fucking jackpot.” Grinning outwardly, I raised an eyebrow.

  Fuck! How could I let her think this was how I go around conducting myself? My stomach felt weighed down with guilt at how I was treating her and sadness washed over me. I had no choice. I had to let her go.

  Sighing involuntarily, conveying my genuine regret, I stood up with my head down. Pushing my hands deep down into the pockets of my jeans, I straightened my arms awkwardly before looking up at her. Conflict reigned. I could see it on her face, trying to think about how to answer me as we stood in an awkward silence.

  Instinctively, my hand began moving out of my pocket; like it was acting independently of the rest of me, deciding for me that I needed to comfort her after what I’d just said. Stroking her hair in an effort to soothe her I began to talk. “I’m twenty-four years old Lily, music is the only love I have room for. I don’t do romance, and I’m not a hearts-and-flowers kind of guy. I’m a highly sexed young man, and I do just fine for offers.”

  What I was saying was true. “I’m not saying this because I’m an arrogant bastard, and I don’t usually proposition women; they come on to me.” Again, this was true. I’d never even considered saying something like that to a woman. Exhaling heavily again, my eyes ticked over her face, watching my words being absorbed by her. “It’s just how it is,” I stated flatly. At least this part wasn’t an act.

  Watching her reaction, her chin was up again, and she stared back. Her lip quivered just a little while she swallowed hard, and her wider than normal eyes told me she was freaked. “Well, I have to admire your honesty, it is refreshing.”

  Her brave comment tugged at my heart strings, and I swallowed audibly. The next part was completely honest. “I just feel a connection between us.” I wagged my finger at the space between us. “An acute sexual tension if you will. It could make for some pretty amazing sex between us. I think we have great chemistry. I felt it even before I looked at you.”

  Everything I was telling her was my true feelings, but with the way I was behaving I felt sure Lily would call me out on it and turn on her heel to leave. She didn’t.

  “Wow, I’ve heard some pick-up lines in my time Alfie. You know just how to seduce a woman, huh?” Sarcasm dripped from her tongue. Why didn’t she just leave? I was pretty sure I would have if I had been her.

  Suddenly, an overwhelming urge, no a need, to stop fighting what I was feeling overpowered me. The need to kiss her was so fucking strong, and I had no fight left in me for this. Something inside compelling me to do it—if only to know what she tasted like just this one time—even if it killed me afterwards.

  After everything I had said to Lily, she was either going to let me or kick me in the balls. They were aching like they’d been locked in a vice for a month anyway, so it was a chance I was willing to take. Her eyes were still locked into mine—an incredible sky blue color—and her pupils were dilated. I only realized that I was smiling at her as I began to lean forward.

  Even before I acted I knew it was a liberty to take a kiss from her, especially when the draw between us was so strong. Damn, if I had empathy with anyone right now, it was with Eve and that damned apple.

  My finger curved around the V of her t-shirt as I stared at Lily and drew her closer to me. She didn’t resist, and her eyes dropped to my lips, letting me know she knew where we were headed. Lily had read me correctly. She knew what was coming next, and there wasn’t a hint that she was in conflict about what to do about it.

  Fighting for control of myself, I concentrated on her face. She looked so fucking sweet. Our closeness was making my body hum, the anticipation heightened by the previous resistance to her, making what I wanted to do with her so much more intense.

  Lily’s face was like porcelain, so petite and delicate in comparison to mine. The innocent eyes that looked up at me almost blew me away with the pink cloud of lust in them. As she came closer the scent of her skin almost floored me. She smelled so fucking good, like roses. It made me want to taste her even more. It was a delicate smell, not overpowering. I hated it when women splashed all that crap on. It choked me. There was nothing quite like the individual scent of a woman.

  She swayed closer to me from her heels to her toes, and my head automatically dipped and tilted, but I didn’t take the kiss from her, not at that point. I held my mouth mere inches from hers basking in the shallow breaths that feathered over my face. We studied each other in a reverent silence.

  My hand wrapped lightly around her throat and her skin there felt as silky and perfect as it had looked. Running my hand up the length of it slowly, I skimmed her jawline and stopped at the nape of her neck. She shivered at my touch, her eyes widening, and she gave me a slightly raised brow, before they hooded sensually as my fingers held her in place. Lily was responding to me, and her lips parted slightly as her breath hitched. She looked as captivated by the moment as I was, but she was paralyzed by my touch.

  Cupping her chin in my other hand, I needed her to focus on me. I was seducing her without even thinking about it, because I’d never wanted anything in my life as much as I wanted to kiss Lily right then.

  Staring at her mouth, internal conflict was pushed aside. There was no turning back for us. My focus dropped to her beautiful luscious lips, and I allowed my thumb to graze where my mouth wanted to be, wetting my lips in readiness for the kiss I was about to take.

  For the first time in my life I was scared to kiss a girl. Scared of what it would mean to me, what it might mean to her, and what I’d have to deny myself if it was as amazing as I anticipated it was going to be.

  That last thought registered as my lips touched hers. It pulled me back to the point where I was barely touching her lips with mine. The feeling of just connecting like that, and the chain reaction it stimulated inside of me was like nothing I had experienced before. Strong, raw, primal needs were drawn from the depths of me, pushing for more. Those feelings were so overwhelming and spurred me on.

  Tracing my tongue along the seam of her lips was a silent plea for acceptance. Lily’s mouth parted, and my tongue delved gently, deeply, into her mouth. Hot wet tongues lapped and danced together in a gentle, tender moment as we learned to cope with the feelings we were experiencing.

  The sensations evolving throughout my body from what we were doing was electrifying. From the moment our tongues met, a current began shooting down to my dick like jagged bolts of lightning. Lily shifted in my arms and sagged toward me, her soft breasts pressing into my hard chest.

  The effect of her submission to the kiss was a euphoric feeling I’d never had before. She moaned softly, and the sweet sound was muffled as it rolled and vibrated around in my mouth making me so damned hard I thought the skin on my dick would split with the tension. I chuckled softly in the kiss, because that moan, and what it did for me, was sexy as hell.

  Savoring every single second of our kiss, I moved my mouth on hers. Slowly, setting the pace and fighting to control the urge to devour her. I remember thinking this wasn’t supposed to be happening, yet there was no fucking way I was going to let it be over in a flash either.

  My fingers tangled in her hair, and I woun
d it around my hand as her hands left my hair and slid under my t-shirt to score her nails firmly down my back. Tugging on her hair gently, I angled her face upwards and pressed her closer, deepening the kiss.

  The whole effect of what we were doing tore a low guttural growl from my throat. Lily was fucking amazing, and I swear my dick had never been so hard for so long, yet the most we had done was share a kiss. She was moaning softly, her body leaning completely into mine, and she began to tremble slightly.

  If I hadn’t known better I’d have said she almost had an orgasm. The thought tore another growl from my throat, and I knew I had to stop. This situation between us was going to intensify very quickly if I didn’t. “Holy shit, I love the noises you make when I kiss you.” My breathing was ragged and labored, and my body tingled. Yeah, that word again, it fucking tingled.

  Observing her reaction, I could see it had affected her in the same way. There was no choice but to push her away from me and set her back on her feet, effectively ending what we were doing. Lily was breathless as well, and the look in her eyes told me that she had given in to the sensations that were going on between us and was just as overcome with lust as I was.

  My gaze rose until it met hers. My body was still in denial at having the hormone riot I had been feeling withdrawn abruptly. I was nodding like a fucking idiot, breathless. “Uh, huh!” I said gruffly, my thick voice struggling past my throat. I cleared it and dragged my fingertips over my bruised lips.

  Coherent thoughts wouldn’t come at first. I was stunned. Silently, we stared at each other, not sure if it was because we were rendered speechless at the effect we had on each other or if Lily wasn’t talking because she was wigging out about how to get out of this.

  “Fuck!” My reaction, when it came, wasn’t mooted. A broad smile I couldn’t suppress stretched across my face. “Damn it. I’ve never felt like that before. Way more than I even suspected. You felt it too, right?” I was wagging my finger between us again. “This kind of connection doesn’t happen every day. I just knew it. Oh, well shit, I’m even more than intrigued by you now.” I grinned honestly because I was forgetting everything I had promised myself I would do to push her away.