Love with Every Beat

by K. L. Shandwick

  My voice was soft, I had to show her that I did respect women and that I could show restraint. “Can I lie beside you? I haven’t slept with a woman in a long time.” It was true. I never stayed the night if I got lucky, and in the past two years I’d only slept with two women. As a single guy in a band that made me a monk. Bearing in mind the thought of extra responsibility if someone claimed to be pregnant by me… it would have finished me off.

  “Yeah, sure, it’ll be a novel experience for you, I’m sure.” Her words smarted with me—she really did think so little of me.

  Lily finished her bedtime routine and got into bed. I sat in the bathroom for a long time trying to figure out what the hell was going on in my head. I shouldn’t have been there with her. I had known her for only two days, and I couldn’t do anything that didn’t involve thinking about her.

  A series of questions that I had no answers for ran through my mind. Could I actually lie beside her and not try to touch her. My body was craving her all the time, even when I saw her from a distance, and now I was going to lie beside her all night? I wasn’t even wearing any boxers.

  Showering, I took care of myself, trying to abate any urge to nail her to the mattress as soon as I got into bed. I wrapped a towel around my waist, and looking in the mirror, I questioned what I was doing there with her when my mind-set should have been on what my priorities were. By the time I left the bathroom I’d been in there for half an hour. With any luck she’d be asleep now.

  Slipping between the sheets beside her made me feel both excited and nervous. The smell of her scent was so unique. She smelled amazing. Her soft skin briefly connected with mine as I settled, making my dick twitch. So much for taking care of that particular function. “Are you awake?” I asked softy. Her breathing was even and quite deep, she was asleep.

  “Shit, I’m sorry Lily, I truly am. I don’t ever want to hurt you,” a whispered apology hung in the air between us as she slept.

  Wanting much more from her than to lie next to her, my heart felt heavy because I wanted to envelope her in my arms and hug her. I couldn’t, so I lay listening to her breathing until I eventually fell asleep. When I woke my arm was tight around Lily’s waist under her tank top. We were spooning and to be honest the feeling was almost better than sex. My dick didn’t think so though, my morning wood standing proud.

  I could tell the moment she woke up. Her breathing changed, and she stretched out a little. But she lay exactly where she was. Lily was enjoying our embrace as much as I was. Eventually, she moved away from me.

  We were both tacky from sweat, and I shifted as she tried to untangle herself from me. When she rolled away from me, I watched her—with her mussy, wild hair sticking out cutely—as she padded away from me and disappeared into the bathroom. The bolt clicked—she’d locked the door.

  Hearing the shower start up, I lay there in silence, listening to the water run a regulated fashion and where there were breaks in that, I imagined the flow being disturbed by some part of her beautiful body.

  Music began to play in the sitting room. Someone else was there with us. Maroon 5 “Lucky Strike” was playing and jeez was that ever an omen. I heard her returning to the room. The bathroom door creaked, and I closed my eyes. I didn’t want her to feel embarrassed that I was still there.

  Hearing her groan softly, I wondered if it was because she didn’t want to deal with this ‘thing’ between us. She left the room, and I heard her and a Texas voice in conversation, but not what they were saying.

  By the time Lily came back to the bedroom, I was in the shower. She had brought me some coffee. “Alfie, we need to move, I have to be on campus in less than an hour.” So I dried off, pulled on my clothing, and when I went back into the bedroom, she was in a cute little skater dress. My eyes did a quick perusal of her.

  “You look beautiful. Can I see you later?” My face was serious. We really needed to talk, there was stuff I needed to say but didn’t know how to. Plus, I was going away.

  “Let me think about that. I’m not sure what is happening today.” It was a start, so I left it at that.

  We left each other in the parking lot at her apartment, actually I cut her short. She was beginning to ask me about classes I was taking, and I almost slipped up and explained what I was doing on campus. Another conversation we needed to have but that morning definitely wasn’t the time.

  Again, we arrived in the parking lot on campus at the same time. She even parked next to me. I sat for a moment thinking she’d get out and go, but she stayed where she was looking over at me. I knew I was going to appear rude, but I got out, slammed my door and pressed the key fob to lock up. Lily began to get out of the car, and I couldn’t make eye contact with her. “I’ll text you later,” I said and just left her standing there.

  The feeling I had in pit of my stomach at snubbing her was heart wrenching, but I couldn’t afford to compromise. Kara and Poppy’s lives were what mattered, and I had to keep reminding myself of that.

  Focusing on anything was difficult for me that morning. I couldn’t stop thinking about Lily. My mind was crammed full of her. Every song and every discussion I had about music seemed to lead back to thoughts of her.

  By lunchtime I knew I couldn’t go to the canteen. If I saw her, I doubted whether I’d have been able to continue my cool, indifferent act around her. So I took myself for a walk around campus. The sun was scotching hot, but there was a slight breeze in the air giving us Floridians a welcome break from the normally humid conditions.

  There were some excellent sounds coming from a group of students playing on the far side of the lawn. Wandering over to where a crowd had gathered, I stopped in my tracks when I saw Lily sitting among them.

  There was a guy with a tenor saxophone playing with her and another guy doing some amazing beat boxing lending his amazing sound to their rendition of ‘Wonderwall’ by Oasis. I heard them play, but my eyes were completed rooted on Lily. She was sitting across from the saxophonist playing her guitar right along with them, and I couldn’t believe how talented she was.

  Of course she had to be musically gifted to be on the course she was on, but damn she was improvising, and it sounded pretty original to me. She was smiling at the group, a slight blush on her cheeks, and from the short time I’ve known her, I could see she was a little uncomfortable with the attention.

  My reckoning from watching her was that this was something she was going to have to come to terms with pretty quickly, because I was sure Lily was going to go places. Lily was smart, stunning to look at, and very musically talented. It was a no brainer. She’d be snapped up by someone sooner or later. If I wasn’t already in a band I’d definitely want to work with her.

  My eyes scanned instinctively at the guys standing around watching; they were all transfixed on her. That kind of pissed me off as well. I wanted her to be invisible to everyone else. Possessive thoughts about not sharing her crossed my mind. Feelings I need to reign in.

  Watching her in her element was incredible. The girl was so damn sexy and completely unaware of that fact. The way she pursed her lips and licked them in concentration was fun to watch, but it turned me on at the same time. I kept expecting a flaw to emerge with her, but she became more attractive every time I learned something new about her.

  Apart from the music, you could have heard a pin drop. There must have been over a hundred students gathered and a quick glance around told me not one of them was talking at all. When they finished playing, the crowd erupted in a round of applause and raucous cheers and whistles. Lily looked stunned by the reaction of them and looked around nervously, her eyes falling on me.

  I could tell the moment they did, because she squirmed. My lips curled up in a salacious smile enjoying the fact that even with all the people around her, she had reacted to me like that. Lily had played fabulously and this was safe ground. Here was a group of musicians jamming together, and I was a mentor. This was part of my role on campus, so I could get involved. I winked at her, but
she looked away and started hugging the douche with the saxophone next to her.

  My initial reaction was that I wanted to break the guy’s jaw. The feeling of jealousy rose up inside me, both shocking and horrifying me at the same time. I wondered what I was doing—Lily wasn’t mine and never would be. At that moment I knew, I mean really knew, that she was affecting me more than any one person had in my whole life.

  Striding over to the group but, being careful about our arrangement, I kind of ignored Lily, instead focusing on the douche and congratulating him on his performance. It was a coincidence that a friend of my friend Drew was doing a charity gig on the beach that night so I had some leverage about what I did next.

  I had agreed to produce and manage the event for them as a favor, and we had two support acts playing before them. Managing it gave me some license about what went on up there on stage so I dove in with both feet.

  Feeling smug, I put my idea forward for them to play at the gig and inviting everyone around to the party. The douche persuaded Lily to perform with him, and the others in their group all encouraged them to do it. I was relieved when she agreed.

  Thank God they sounded brilliant, because I’d have had some questions to answer if I’d invited them to perform just because of Lily and they were mediocre; the band had a reputation to keep.

  Chapter 10 – First Performance

  On the beach the stage set looked great. I had spent a couple of hours making sure that the event would run smoothly, and we were ready to get the party started. Lily arrived and I watched her from a distance. She looked sensational in her cute little outfit that was perfect for the occasion. She was with some friends, and although the two girls with her were beautiful, they weren’t a match for Lily.

  Her paleness and fragility set her apart. It wasn’t that she was smaller or taller or slimmer or anything like that, it was just that I couldn’t stop looking at her. It was hard to explain, Lily was like this… mirage of an oasis in a desert, and I was so fucking thirsty for her.

  Walking casually toward them, there were two guys in the group, but I focused on the douche. “Hey man!” I said, ignoring her altogether. “All set?” The douche gave me a, ‘thumbs- up’ signal. “Yeah, we’re good. This is Lily, who’s playing acoustic guitar with me.”

  Again, frustration got a strangle hold on me, I wanted to tell the fucker I knew exactly who she was, but I bit back the feeling and didn’t. Trying to keep my cool about the circumstances I had created for myself, I chatted with douche.

  Ignoring Lily wasn’t easy, but if I’d spoken to her, it would have been impossible to hide all the feelings I was having for her. Fighting those feelings became ridiculous because I couldn’t even make eye contact with the poor girl.

  So… I directed them to where they needed to be and heard him complain to her about my manners. Douche made me snicker. I’ve met his type before, all bravado in front of the girls, but not man enough to speak their mind in case it affects their chances. I wanted to wipe the smug smile off the bastard’s face.

  As I walked away I heard him say, “I don’t know the guy, but he needs to get some fucking manners. Sorry about that, honey.”

  I glanced back, and she shrugged, trying to look as though it hadn’t affected her, but the look on her face told me I’d hurt her again. I had to fight the urge to go over and pull her to my chest and soothe her. “Let it go, Will, don’t let it spoil things for you,” she said softly.

  “You’re just too nice!” he sympathized. “If he ignored me, I’d put him on his ass.”

  Warm weather, a brilliant atmosphere, and great bands all contributed to the event being a fabulous success and when Lily and Douche played, the crowd loved them. They had such a good response the headliners told me to have them perform another song.

  Admitting Lily and the douche played well together almost choked me, but they complemented each other’s musical ability and style. It was more than impressive that Lily could play like that with someone she’d only just met on the one hand, but I hated the fact that it was him. They made an attractive act to look at as well, and I hated the way he looked at her.

  In other circumstances he would probably be a nice guy. He’s musically talented, seemed popular with her friends, and looked all burly and athletic. But fuck, he was going to be spending time with my girl. It dawned on me that I was so fucking jealous of this guy, and I was worried about how close they might get. The sensory overload of knowing Lily was staggering.

  When Lily was done on stage, I watched intently as she packed up her guitar. She was wearing this killer outfit of the shortest shorts and a brown top with sequins. I couldn’t take my eyes off of her as she packed everything away.

  The way Lily moved around with elegance had me hypnotized. Legs that were incredibly slender and sexy, she was wearing the most sensational ‘fuck me’ heels. Urgent thoughts rushed through my head at the sight of them, and I desperately wanted those legs of hers wrapped around my waist, heels and all.

  Lily bent over and damn me, if she wasn’t wearing any panties, because I swear I saw glimpse of her pussy at one point. Once the headliners were on stage and in full flow my job was done. Drew told me he’d finish the gig and help direct the teardown of the stage and equipment afterwards. So when I was free to enjoy the rest of the night my first thought was finding Lily. My cell burned in my hand, and although there were a thousand reasons why this wasn’t a good idea, my fingers were already punching out a text to her.

  SEXPERT: FUCKING ACE! WOW! I love the fuck-me killer heels.

  Pink Lady: The fuck-me heels are reserved for emotional fucking with attention to detail by the ‘fuckee’.

  I couldn’t help but chuckle, she was pissed that I’d ignored her, but the fact she replied right away told me she wasn’t immune to me.

  SEXPERT: You’re a very sexy lady. When I saw you today on campus playing, I wanted to scoop you up, take you home, and fuck you senseless. When I heard you play, you were inspiring and altogether too fucking hot.

  Pink Lady: Why do you ignore me?

  Hmm, I wasn’t sure what to tell her. “We have a no frat policy at campus and I’m a mentor?” I might just as well say, “Alfie and Lily…The End.” I wasn’t able to do that. However, something told me that she’d be worried about having anything to do with me once she knew my position at college. I almost told her the other day but something stopped me.

  Maybe because she was a foreign student, and she might be too scared about losing her visa to study. So my next text I decided to challenge her, ignoring the fact that I had treated her badly.

  SEXPERT: Ignore you? What am I doing now?

  Pink Lady: Sitting naked holding your dick?

  And…Sassy Lily was back in play with me. Let the flirting begin.

  SEXPERT: LMAO, I meant I’m not ignoring you.

  Pink Lady: You have a tongue in your head, use it.

  SEXPERT: I used my tongue very well yesterday don’t you think? As for ignoring you…do you want people to know I’m your fuck buddy?

  Pink Lady: Hmm, and that’s why you ignore me?

  SEXPERT: hence the distant stance. Who would ever think my tongue had been where others can only dream of?

  Pink Lady: Hmm…good point. Let me think about that, maybe I’ll get back to you.

  SEXPERT: Can you do that quickly or I am in danger of creaming my pants at the sight of you.

  Pink Lady: Easy remedy, take your pants off.

  SEXPERT: I’d much rather you took them off.

  Pink Lady: Take my pants off? I am not wearing pants in case you hadn’t noticed.

  Snickering at her comeback. I knew Lily would die of embarrassment when I answered this one.

  SEXPERT: Oh, I noticed all right, no panties either. I saw the slightest hint of pink when you bent to put your guitar in its case with your legs open.

  Pink Lady: Pervert! You shouldn’t have been looking.

  SEXPERT: You shouldn’t wear clothes that get you noticed
then! Let’s get the fuck out of here.

  I couldn’t wait to get my hands on Lily again. My body was already alert with anticipation, and I headed for the car to make my way home—this girl was getting under my skin.

  Pink Lady: I came in a cab with the others.

  Should I have taken her home in my car? Maybe, but there were a couple of professors at this gig. It was a charity event connected to the college. I couldn’t risk it.

  SEXPERT: I don’t want to know what you did in the cab or who with. Meet me at mine.

  The texts must have crossed because she replied.

  Pink Lady: I’ll come to your place.

  SEXPERT: Grammatical error there my dear, you mean you’ll cum at my place, but you’ll beg first. See you at mine in 30.

  Feelings of excitement filled me as I hurried to my car. My mind was going ten to the dozen, my body humming at the thought of her. Driving home, I passed a store and decided to grab some stuff that would fulfill a fantasy she starred in. Feeling all smug with myself as I got in the car with my carrier bag of supplies, I hoped Lily would be game about doing what I had in mind for the both of us.

  By the time she arrived, I could hardly contain myself, rushing to open the door. I was so turned on by then, my arm slid around her waist, and I pulled her into me, closing the door with my heel. It banged closed harder than I intended; my adrenaline rush gave me more strength than usual.

  Scooping Lily up into my arms and kissing her mouth hard was my way of saying hello to her. Our tongues tangled in a sweet battle, Lily participating as eagerly as I was, her fingertips skimming up over my shoulders and grasping my hair.

  Desperate feelings of want bubbled inside me—making me feel that I’d never get enough of Lily—colliding with feelings that we weren’t supposed to get involved. She tasted so sweet, of pear drops, and the taste was making my dick strain hard against my jeans. Getting us up to the bedroom seemed to take forever as I stopped and pressed her against the landing wall, our lips never leaving one another.