“I want to hear the end of that song.”
“You will.” Julian grabbed her hands and pulled her up off of the couch. She came reluctantly.
“Where are we going?”
“Well,” Julian said, his arm around her, “I thought I should dispel all those terrible rumors.”
“Rumors?” They were at a door, and Julian spun her around, pressing her up against the oak. He kissed her hard, and the ache of desire that ran through her made her instantly wet again. His hands ran down over her body, crumpling the shimmering fabric between his fingers. He lifted the hem of her dress slightly, running his hands along her buttocks. She squirmed.
“There’s this terrible rumor going around,” he said, whispering in her ear. “That I’m a tease.”
Shannon blushed, but before she could say anything he had opened the door and they were stumbling into the bedroom. Julian lifted her onto the bed as though she were weightless, and she gasped at his strength. Then he was on top of her, kissing her, his legs pressing insistently between her thighs. Her dress was hiked up to her hips, and she felt herself burning with longing.
The bed was huge; she was like a miniature person lying atop the fluffy comforter. It was the most comfortable bed she had ever been on, and she writhed underneath Julian, letting her body sink into the padding. Then Julian pulled back and sat up.
“Look at you,” he said. He gestured to the side of the room. The closet door was a giant sliding mirror, and in the dim lights Shannon could see herself lying down, Julian between her legs. She flushed. He was so handsome, and as he unbuttoned his shirt her lips parted slightly. Unconsciously her tongue flicked out and licked her lips.
He ripped off his shirt and tossed it to the floor. The man was built like a Greek statue, all muscle and no fat. Every part of him was toned and tan, the perfect model of a man. A rock star.
“Don’t look at me,” Julian said, watching her eyes in the mirror. “Look at you.”
Shannon didn’t want to. She tore her eyes away from Julian and prepared herself to look at her own reflection. When she did, she knitted her brows in a frown. Her thighs were humongous, and her stomach seemed to push out against the fabric of her dress in a stupidly unflattering way. Everything about her seemed wrong.
“It’s all wrong,” she whispered to herself.
Julian noticed her expression.
“Agreed,” he said. “All wrong.”
Shannon felt a lump rise into her throat. For the first time since she had arrived in the apartment, she felt confronted with her own appearance. She hated it.
“You have entirely too many clothes on,” he said. “It’s horrible.”
Shannon smiled wanly and turned her eyes back to Julian. She wanted all of the lights to be off, she wanted the mirror gone. He reached down and unzipped her dress, pulling it up over her hips. She tilted herself back, letting him take off the slinky dress. His hand slid around her back and unhooked her bra expertly.
“We really need to fix this,” he said. “What is all this fabric doing? It’s in the way.”
He threw the bra down next to where his shirt had landed. Shannon expected him to take off his own pants, to get it done quickly, but he just sat back after taking off her bra, staring down at her body.
She felt totally vulnerable. Even in the dim lights, she could see everything, every part of her that was wrong or bulging. Her arms came up awkwardly against her sides. She couldn’t hide it. She felt invaded by his eyes.
“My god, you are gorgeous.”
Shannon couldn’t help but laugh once, hard.
“I think you need glasses,” she said. There was no hiding the bitter note that crept into her voice.
“No.” Julian shook his head decisively. “I could just look at you forever.”
Shannon twisted uncomfortably on the bed.
“I’m sorry,” Julian said. “I’m sorry. But you have to see what I see.” His hands stroked her legs, her thighs. She thanked heaven that she had shaved earlier.
He bent forward and kissed her on the forehead. Her body relaxed slightly as she felt the warmth of his chest against hers. He caressed her cheek, gazing deeply into her eyes, then tilted her head towards the mirror.
“Look,” he said. She could just make out the sliver of space between their bodies as she watched in the mirror.
“What do you see?” Her whisper was almost inaudible.
“The most beautiful woman in the world.” He kissed her neck, his tongue sliding slowly across her skin. She felt her body stir with desire.
“Keep looking,” he said. “Don’t stop.” She obeyed.
He bent over her and kissed the spot between her breasts. She watched the mirror as he moved his mouth over her skin, his tongue circling her areola. His lips sucked hard at her nipple and she moaned. When he retreated, she could see the nipple perking up erect.
“These are perfect,” he said. His large, strong hands cupped them and she watched as he pinched the erect nipple, rolling in between his fingers. She whimpered in agony. God, she was wet.
He licked them, kissed them, and as she watched in the mirror she felt the ache between her legs grow. It was almost as though she was watching porn, only no porn star was as handsome as Julian. Most guys skipped the foreplay when they took her home, and so this was a refreshing change, even if she did have to watch herself alongside him. It wasn’t so bad, really. Especially now, when he wasn’t looking directly at her.
Then he moved down farther, and before she could protest his face was buried in between her thighs. Colorful flashes obscured her vision and her back arched against the soft bed.
Oh god. Oh god oh god oh god oh god.
Never. Never anything like this. No guy had ever done this to her, not the first time, not without her having to beg and plead and reciprocate a dozen times over. This was... incredible.
His mouth sealed itself around her, his tongue moving slowly across the small hard nub that was sending electrical shocks of pleasure through every nerve ending she had. She writhed under his touch.
“Julian,” she said. The words scratched at the air and her heart raced. Was this really happening?
It was – he was licking now, letting his tongue drag over her most sensitive regions, over and over again. The pressure eased and then bore down, and she felt as though she would explode with the ache of her desire. At every change in his tongue’s direction her inner self twisted in pleasure, and no matter how she tried to suppress her body’s wriggling she found that she could not.
“Such a perfect pussy,” Julian said. Shannon giggled. Then he breathed on her, right there, and she shivered at his breath which was warm against the cool air of the room.
“Everything about you is perfect,” Julian said. He raised his head slightly and kissed her –oh god—on the stomach, and then he was bent down again and sucking hard and she cried out loud in blissful agony.
Shannon had kept her arms at her sides, but as she let herself give into her urges her fingers scrabbled at the blankets, twining themselves into the fabric. She longed to run her hands through his dark hair, but no, that would be too much. She couldn’t.
Julian’s hands were under her, lifting her ass and kneading the flesh in a slow massage. His tongue moved in circles around and around her clit, teasing her. He would push forward, then back away just as she felt that she was on the precipice. Her heart beat loudly in her ears and her breath caught in her throat on every other inhale as he moved his lips over her. He pulled away for a moment, and her heart skipped a beat in her chest.
“Julian,” she moaned.
“Mmmmm,” he hummed, his lips slightly touching her most private area and vibrating them with the shivers of his lips. It was indescribably delicious, but the touch was so light that she felt she would die if he stopped right then.
“Please,” she gasped. “Oh god, please.”
Julian reached over and took one of her hands from the bedspread, entwining his fingers aro
und hers. He brought her hand to his head and she let her fingers slide through his perfect hair.
“Show me what you want,” Julian said.
Then he bore down fully, his mouth sucking hard at her clit so that she cried out. Unconsciously, her other hand came up to his head as well and she gripped his hair tightly, her body twisting of its own accord under the incredible pressure.
“Oh god!” she cried out. She felt as though she would accidentally kick him, her muscles were twitching with such force. He did not stop licking her, his tongue now flicking her clit in a fluttering motion.
“Julian!” she moaned. She could feel it, feel herself coming to the edge. She was almost there. Almost—
He pulled away just as she was about to come, and she let out a gasping cry.
“No!” she cried. “Don’t stop!” Her body was wracked with shivers of desire, the agonizing pain of want rippling through her nerves. Her hands pulled at his hair and her legs tightened around him. If she had not been so turned on, she would have been ashamed at how needy she was, but Julian seemed to enjoy it.
He paused to look up at her between her breasts.
“God, you’re beautiful. Tell me what you want.”
“Please... please...” she whimpered. She craved the release, needed it. Needed him. Her hands were tearing at his hair, pulling at his shoulders.
“Yes?”
“More,” she gasped. “Just a little more.”
“Anything for you,” he said. He bent his head and renewed his task with full vigor, and Shannon was immediately propelled back up into the heights of pleasure.
“Oh god,” she moaned. “Yes. Oh god yes, right there.” She had never been one to talk in the bedroom, had always felt embarrassed about her moans and noises. For whatever reason, here on the soft bed of a famous rock star, she felt something inside her shake free of its chains and break loose.
“YES!” She screamed aloud as Julian sucked hard. She did not even try to suppress the thrills running through her body. “OH YES!” She was rising higher, higher than ever before, and she knew that the orgasm that would soon hit her was going to shake her to the core.
Then Julian plunged two fingers into her wet, dripping slit, and she came immediately, her moans and screams sounding alien to her, far away. Her entire body shuddered and clenched around him, and he worked his fingers deeper, pressing out so that she was filled completely.
The waves of her orgasm did not seem to ever stop. Julian’s lips were sucking her clit hard and her body rocked against him, arching and twisting as she moaned his name. Her blood was pumping through her veins and she shivered, coming again and again as he pressed his fingers into her.
“Julian, oh god! Julian!”
Her breath was ragged against the air when she finally felt the orgasm subside. Julian wiped his mouth against his arm and bent over, kissing her there once more, lightly. She shivered, now ticklish in every nerve down there.
Oh god, what he must think of her? Screaming like that... moaning his name? But when Julian slid next to her, wrapping one arm under her body, she saw that he was smiling. She rolled over slightly with him and he kissed the back of her neck.
“Shannon, you are so beautiful,” he murmured. She looked up. The mirror was right in front of her, but she could not even recognize herself in it. Her hair was mussed, her face flushing red with the heat of her orgasm, but she looked... beautiful.
His hand slid up and down the side of her hip, caressing her skin, and she felt at that moment that she could do anything, be anyone. It was impossible, but here they were. She was in Julian Bremmer’s arms, and she looked beautiful.
“You taste so good,” he whispered into her ear. She felt her body shiver again, as though another small orgasm was shaking her. “So hot.”
Shannon had never imagined a man who could be turned on by going down on her, but Julian was stroking her, caressing her, and she knew that he was telling the truth. He kissed her neck again and she moaned.
“Oh, Julian.” She began to turn around so that she could return the favor, but he stopped her.
“Let’s just lie like this for a while,” Julian said.
“You don’t want...” Shannon trailed off. In her heart a twinge of pain made her wince and a hundred ugly questions reared up. She had fought so hard to keep her anxiety at bay, but it was like the mythical hydra – every time she thought she had cut down one of her insecurities, two more rose to take its place.
Did he think she was ugly?
Was he not turned on?
Did he just not want her? Would anyone ever really want her?
“You don’t want to...” She tried again to say the words, but her throat seemed to be closed. Ridiculous – a second ago she had been sure of his affection, but now she couldn’t even bring herself to ask him if he wanted to fuck her.
“I do,” Julian said, hugging her tight. He kissed her temple. “Just not tonight. Not right now.”
“Why?”
As soon as the word came out, Shannon knew she had messed up. Julian’s face dropped and Shannon tried to repair the damage.
“I don’t mean... I only wanted to...”
Julian shook his head and smiled again, and Shannon’s heart unclenched a bit in her chest.
“Don’t worry, Shannon,” he said. “It’s just that I’m really tired from the show, and the band is traveling tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?”
Julian stroked her hair with his fingers.
“We have two more stops on the tour.”
Shannon wanted to ask if she would see him again, but she worried about sounding needy. He answered her unspoken question with a kiss.
“Please, please don’t worry. I want you,” he said, kissing her shoulder. “I want to be with you again. And I want to fuck you like crazy.” He grinned, and Shannon flushed a bit, giggling.
“Do you always get what you want?” Shannon teased. She felt so much better, so relieved. He did want her. Of course he was tired.
“Always,” Julian said, hugging her. He wrapped his body around her, curling her tightly to his chest in post-coital bliss. “Do you need to wake up for anything? Class?”
“No,” she said. She would take tomorrow off and spend her hours dreaming about what had just happened. It already felt unreal to her, like an image through a lens. She heard him yawn behind her.
“Goodnight then, sexy redhead.”
“Goodnight, sexy rock star.”
Shannon looked at herself in the dimly lit mirror. Her body was covered by the sheets but she could still make out the line of her shoulder, dipping down to her waist and then back up to her hip. Julian’s dark hair lay tousled over the pillow, his arm slung across her curves under the covers. His chest rose and fell, and she could feel him easing steadily into the rhythm of sleep behind her.
What next? she thought, then mentally kicked herself for being ridiculous. There was nothing that came next, just an awkward conversation and shuffle out the door in the morning. It wasn’t as though a girl like her could ever be the girlfriend of a rock star. And yet...
She looked again in the mirror. Julian’s body fit against hers like they were two pieces of a puzzle. Her hair was a dark ruby red in the dim light, and for a split second she glimpsed the beauty that Julian saw in her. Sexy redhead, indeed. Her eyelids drooped down sleepily as she fell out of one dream and into another.
***
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Shannon stared across the doorway at Julian, a thousand thoughts running through her mind. It was him. It really was him. She didn’t know what to say.
Julian stepped forward, shyly offering her the rose. She took it, and his fingers brushed against hers. The single touch made her body flinch with a desire that she had been trying unsuccessful
ly to stifle for the past few days.
“I’m sorry I didn’t call,” Julian said.
“It’s…it’s okay. I understand. You’ve been busy with tour stuff.”
“That’s no excuse.”
“You’re in a famous band. That’s enough of an excuse, I guess.”
Julian winced, and Shannon thought she might have said the wrong thing. God, this wasn’t starting out how she wanted it to.
“I just mean you’ve got a lot on your plate.”
“It’s not that at all.” Julian’s voice was rough, as though he was stammering through the words, trying to figure out how to move his tongue to get the right letters out.
“What is it?” If it wasn’t his band, then Shannon didn’t know what it could be. A flame of anger began to rise up inside of her. If he hadn’t called just because…
“I was nervous. I thought maybe I messed up. With you.”
“Messed up?”
“I thought maybe you wanted to be able to tell people you were with, you know, a famous rock star. That it wasn’t really me you wanted. That I was just a good story to tell to your friends.”
Shannon’s mouth dropped open. That was what he was afraid of? A mixture of rage and relief swept through her.
“That’s… I don’t know what to say, Julian.”
“Just tell me what you’re thinking.”
“What I’m thinking?” Shannon threw one hand up in the air, gesturing wildly with the rose. “I’m thinking that it’s ridiculous you made up this whole motivation about why I wanted to be with you out of thin air. I’m thinking you shouldn’t have waited a whole week before asking me about it.”
“I’m sorry-”
Shannon stamped her bare foot on the floor. Now that he had made her talk, all of her anxieties were rushing out, and she didn’t want to stop. Ridiculous - this whole situation was ridiculous.
“I’m thinking that you are an idiot and jerk for keeping me in suspense this whole time.”
Julian’s eyebrows knitted together in the middle of his forehead. It was obvious no girl had ever spoken to him like this before. But Shannon couldn’t stop herself. He had to know what she had done to him.
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