Wes was beaming, happier than she’d ever seen him. He dropped his bag, crossed the room, and crawled onto the bed. He wrapped his arms around her waist and used her stomach as a pillow. Right above their baby.
Kaylee blinked back tears that all of a sudden flooded her eyes. Damn pregnancy hormones. She couldn’t start crying. It was critical they had this conversation without her showing too much emotion and guilt-tripping Wes into doing something he’d regret.
Wes let out a long sigh, his entire body going lax and heavy. “I missed you. So happy to be home.”
Were they a home? The two of them together?
He looked up sleepily. Poor guy had been traveling nonstop. “How are you feeling? You’ve been fighting that bug for a couple of weeks now, right? Have you gone to see someone about it?”
She nodded.
“And?”
“I’m healthy.” She didn’t know why she didn’t just tell him then. She was allowing her fears to get the best of her.
“Good. So have you thought about what I said over the phone?” He sounded super excited. “About you traveling with me? Levi will kick my ass if I take you away from the club, but whatever. He can deal.”
She looked at him sadly. “I can’t travel with you, Wes.”
“Can’t,” he repeated, and sat up. “Why not?”
“My life is here. I really like my job and I don’t want to leave it.”
He nodded slowly as though considering. “I understand.” He sent her a mischievous smile. “Doesn’t mean I’m not going to use everything in my arsenal to change your mind.”
Kaylee tried to smile.
His grin faded. “What else is going on? You don’t seem yourself.”
She stared out the window at the pines beyond. “Wes, what if I told you that I found out the doctors were wrong? About me not being able to get pregnant.”
“I’d say that’s amazing.” He snorted. “And that you need to get on the pill, stat.”
Her eyes narrowed and her mind suddenly went in another direction. “Not condoms?”
He looked at her innocently. “You ruined me. I must be inside you without anything between us.”
“Are you serious right now?”
“No, I’d wear a condom,” he grumbled. “But if it’s all the same, I’d be happy for you to go on the pill.”
She watched his eyes. “I’m not going on the pill…because I’m already pregnant.”
His smile dropped. “Say again?”
She twisted her mouth and tapped her chin. “You know, you very well might have knocked me up that first night on the golf course. This is all your fault, if you think about it. You said you’d impregnated me, and you did. It’s because of your cockiness and virility that we find ourselves in this situation.”
He jumped off the bed. “What the fuck!” His stare was so intense that she thought he might have a heart attack.
“Sit down before you hurt yourself.”
But he didn’t sit. He walked around the bedroom, glancing every now and then at her stomach. “Can’t be.”
“It is.”
“How?”
She gave him a look. “How do you think?”
“But you said…”
“I was wrong. The doctor who told me I couldn’t get pregnant was wrong.”
“But you’ve been…you know.” He sighed. “I really don’t like thinking of you with anyone else, so it pains me to bring this up, but you’ve been with others.”
“I’ve been with one other since you. A person who can’t have children.” She lifted her eyebrow.
“Holy. Fuck.” He started to pace again and ran his hand through his hair. He stopped to stare at her stomach, then shook his head and paced some more. And then he was muttering incoherently.
“Wes.” He didn’t acknowledge her. “Wes, you’re starting to worry me.”
He stopped at the edge of the bed, eyes wide, and swallowed. “Are you okay for a little while? Do you need anything?”
She shook her head slowly. She’d worried he would take the news badly, and this didn’t look good.
“Okay. Because I need to see my brothers. But I’ll be back.” He glanced once more at her belly then left the room, keys in hand. She heard the front door open and close downstairs seconds later.
Was this how it was going to be? Zombie Wes? She could handle Zombie Wes, because she was freaked out too. That wasn’t what had her worried.
She was worried about ruining his dreams. The ones he’d finally grasped. And that he’d think she was ruining them too.
Chapter 29
Wes sat at the bar in the Club Tahoe steakhouse. “I need to talk to you,” he said to Bran, who was replacing a bottle on one of the glass shelves behind the bar.
“What’s up?”
The place was dead, stuck between dining hours, but that wouldn’t last long. Pretty soon, people would come pouring in for their gourmet dinner at one of the best restaurants in town. “It’s personal,” Wes said.
Bran set a bottle down, wiped his hands on a rag, and walked around the bar. He sat next to Wes. “You okay?”
Wes shook his head and took a deep breath. He’d believed Kaylee when she said she couldn’t get pregnant—had beaten himself up over it, feeling responsible. And now, when everything was finally within grasp, she dropped this on him? “Kaylee just told me she’s pregnant.”
Bran’s eyes widened. He ran a hand through his light hair and looked around as though he were just as shocked as Wes.
That wasn’t what Wes needed. Dammit, he needed his brother to be the coherent one. Because Wes thought he might be losing his mind.
Bran was the thinker—the one brother who didn’t act without weighing all the consequences. He wouldn’t have made love to a woman on the golf course without protection. Shit, Bran was such a monk these days, he wouldn’t have made love to a woman on the golf course, period.
“You’re not the first person to be a part of an unplanned pregnancy,” Bran finally said. “I’m assuming it was unplanned?”
The only person Wes had told about the miscarriage Kaylee suffered was Bran. “Not planned.”
“If I could go back in time, I know what I would have done if the girl I’d dated in high school had given me a choice. The question is, what do you want to do?”
Wes cut Bran a sharp look. “I want my kid. And I want to support Kaylee—no question. But there’s more.” He rubbed his forehead. “I just received word that I made it onto the tour for the rest of the year. The dream I’ve carried most of my life is coming true. But if I take this opportunity, I’d be gone almost all the time.”
Bran shook his head. “Your timing leaves something to be desired.”
Wes chuckled humorlessly. “Tell me about it. The problem is, I want it all. Kaylee, the baby—I even enjoy running the course now. I like teaching kids and training future stars at the game.”
“But letting go of your dream, man…that’s rough.”
Wes glared. “Is that the best you’ve got? Didn’t you used to be a bartender, listening to everyone’s problems and shelling out advice?”
“Past tense.” Bran stood and walked around the bar, picking up a clean glass. “Now I’m running four restaurants and would rather gouge my eyes out than listen to one more person’s problems—brothers not included. I’ve got my fill of bullshit with these employees coming into work with all their issues.” He filled the glass with amber liquid and sent it across the bar. “Liquid courage, brother. That’s all I can offer. And not to put pressure on you or anything, but you’ve got one more problem. Levi’s still worked up about you being gone. If you choose the tour, you’ll need to find someone to help run the course. And that isn’t what Dad would have wanted. Not that you need the reminder.”
None of them, with the exception of maybe Adam, had been close to their father. But since their father’s death, all of Wes’s brothers had taken the responsibility of running the resort seriously, the way their fath
er had dreamed. Like some sort of tribute to the old man.
Wes swigged the shot and pushed the glass across the counter. “Trust me, it hasn’t slipped my mind.”
Bran studied him as he poured Wes’s next shot. “Kaylee’s a good girl. You’re different with her. Less tense. She make you happy?”
Wes nodded, but he wasn’t ready to share his feelings about Kaylee with his brother when he hadn’t shared them with her. He didn’t want to hurt her, but this pregnancy? She could have slapped him across the face and he wouldn’t have been more stunned.
Wes tipped back the second shot. “Better keep these coming. I’m going to need them while I sort this out.”
* * *
Kaylee wasn’t upset when Wes left her immediately after she’d told him about the baby. Honestly, she’d needed these last two days to come to grips with the idea too, and she was still in shock. But it was dark out now and Wes hadn’t returned. And he’d not called or messaged her, either.
Prickly heat rose in her chest. She was sick of putting others’ needs ahead of her own.
Kaylee had always felt like a cling-on to Wes’s drive for glory in college. Even if she’d believed he loved her, it hadn’t been enough. She’d wanted to be a priority. Then, when she was at her lowest, she’d met Eddy and he’d put her first. For a while. Until that was all a lie too. Eddy only loved himself. And here she was, hooking up with Wes again and pregnant, something she’d never thought possible.
Kaylee wasn’t simply mad at Wes for running out and not checking back in. She. Was. Pissed.
She told him she was pregnant with their child, and he left her to huddle with his brothers? That asshole!
He was doing it again. Putting his needs ahead of hers. It had been coming on slowly with the golf tour, but she couldn’t blame him for going for it and finally realizing his dreams. Only now she was pregnant and needed him too. Needed to talk it through with him, at the very least, and feel like she wasn’t alone the way she’d been four years ago.
Would she never learn? She was alone.
Wes hadn’t changed. And she couldn’t even blame him for it. She’d slowly slipped into old habits too, not saying anything about the time he spent away, allowing him to show up whenever he felt like it. She’d told herself they weren’t in a relationship to prevent this outcome. But they were. Kaylee wasn’t seeing anyone else, and neither was Wes.
The only thing she couldn’t understand was why he’d chosen to date her again. No matter how many times she’d told him she didn’t want anything serious, he’d nod and keep right on wooing her into a relationship. He never said he loved her, though. Never talked about a future, unless it was one where she followed him around the country on the tour. And now she’d forced a future on him and he’d run.
Kaylee sank onto the couch and dropped her head in her hands. “Shit.”
She wasn’t even sure she’d be able to hold on to this pregnancy. She’d lost the first baby around the same time—which had ruined everything.
Kaylee stood and stormed into the kitchen. She shoved dishes into the dishwasher. Damn him! And what the hell was up with his sperm? How could he have gotten her pregnant the first time they had sex in four years? She didn’t know if it had happened on the golf course, but it had to have occurred then or soon after, given how far along she was in her pregnancy. She shoved the dishwasher closed and crossed her arms—right as Wes walked through the front door.
His wide shoulders banged into the doorjamb. He nearly lost his balance completely when he tried to shut the door. She peeked out the window and saw a taxi pull away.
Kaylee narrowed her eyes. Even drunk, Wes was handsome. More so because he was off his guard, rumpled, sloppy, and boyish. “I tell you I’m pregnant, and you leave me to get hammered?”
He dumped his wallet on the coffee table, walked across the room, and sank onto the couch, lying back with his arm over his head. “Not now. Talk tomorrow?”
She stormed over and glared down at him. “Do you even want this baby?”
He moved his arm, revealing one steely eye. “You are not hurting our baby.”
She threw up her arms. “Of course I’m not. God, Wes. This could be the best thing that’s ever happened to me. And I thought you’d at least be positive about it.”
He covered his eye again. “I am.”
“Yeah,” she said. “You seem like it.”
She locked the front door and turned back to him. He was snoring lightly, the jackass!
“Wes!” She went over and shoved his leg with her bare foot.
He jerked and seemed to try to sit upright, but instead flopped around on the couch. “What’s wrong?” he slurred.
Everything. Simply everything.
She headed for the staircase. “Don’t even try and get into my bed tonight or you’ll find your drunk ass on the floor.”
There. She’d told him.
But she hadn’t really. Because Wes had gone out and gotten drunk, and not in the celebratory way. He’d gotten drunk in the “holy shit, my fuck buddy is pregnant, now what do I do” way.
Tears stung her eyes as she climbed the stairs. She’d be better off without him. A pain stabbed her in the chest and she rubbed it. Wes wasn’t good for her or the baby. And no way was she losing this one.
Kaylee stood at the top of the stairs and cradled her tummy. “You and me first this time.”
Chapter 30
Wes left the next day for another tournament. He didn’t need to be there for two days, but he’d needed the time to himself. Needed to figure out his next move. Because Kaylee had just turned his life upside down.
For once, he thought things couldn’t be more perfect. He had Kaylee back in his life, and he’d just made the big time in golf. Okay, the lower end of the big time, given he wasn’t winning tournaments, but still, shit was good.
With shaking hands, he dumped pain relievers into his palm and threw them back, along with a swig of water. His fucking head felt like he’d cracked it on the sidewalk. What the hell was in that whisky last night?
Then again, he’d lost track of how much he’d drunk after his fifth shot. That was probably his primary problem.
He’d played like crap during practice today and blamed it on the alcohol still leaching its way out of his system. But really, the reason could encompass any number of things—a beautiful brunette at the top of that list.
He had issues. Just because he was on the tour track, didn’t mean everything was unicorns and rainbows. In the back of his mind, he’d been concerned about how to hold on to Kaylee while he traveled all the time. It wasn’t a life most women would be happy with, and he’d already put Kaylee through hell years ago due to his golf ambitions. And now there was a baby to consider.
Jesus.
The tournament went much like his practice round. He’d played like crap and didn’t make the cut, so he didn’t earn anything. But that was fine, because his head wasn’t in it. And when it came to golf, if your head wasn’t in the game, you were screwed.
Wes flew back to Lake Tahoe and pulled into Kaylee’s driveway no wiser than when he’d left, and a hell of a lot wearier. He shouldered on his travel bag and walked slowly up the steps to her parents’ place. He reached for the front door, but it was locked.
Sighing, Wes bent and fumbled around for the hide-a-key, but it wasn’t there either.
The fuck? He knocked on the front door. “Kaylee, open up.”
Leaning his head against the door, he rested his dog-tired bones and listened for movement inside. She had to be here. Her car was in the driveway.
Finally, footsteps sounded on the other side of the door and he stepped back, relieved to be home and able to see his girl.
Home. Kaylee was his home.
She opened the door, but she wasn’t smiling like she normally did when he returned from a tournament.
Fear gripped Wes’s chest. Instinctively, he glanced at her stomach, not that he could tell if there was anything wro
ng by looking. “Is the baby okay?”
She leaned her shoulder against the doorjamb. Which was odd. She’d not moved to let him in, and all he wanted was to hold her, maybe collapse on the couch and put his hand on her tummy. Hmm, never thought to do that before, but it sounded nice.
“It isn’t a good idea for you to come inside,” she said.
For a second, Wes’s mind went blank. Why wouldn’t he come in? They were going to have a baby. He’d not been able to verbally pin her down to a committed relationship, but as far as he was concerned, it was unspoken. He wasn’t seeing anyone else, and she wasn’t either.
Unless she was.
Jealousy gripped his chest, his face heating. “Why not?” The question came out harsher than he’d intended.
Kaylee swallowed and stood straight. “If this baby makes it…” Her voice was scratchy, and she blinked a couple of times. “I’ll never keep you from visiting. I want you to be in the baby’s life.”
What was she talking about? It sounded like she was giving him the boot.
Not fucking happening.
Not again.
“Kaylee, I will be in this baby’s life. I will be a father. Whatever you need.”
She took a deep breath and a small smile crossed her lips, but it wasn’t enough. Sadness lurked behind her eyes. “I’m happy to hear that.”
Had she doubted it? “Let me in so we can talk.”
She shook her head. “It’s better this way. What we’ve been doing”—she waved between them—“it was never meant to last. I care so much about you, Wes, but it’s time we end things and cut our losses.”
He felt his jaw tense. For a split second, he’d thought she’d moved on while he’d been gone, but that was a knee-jerk reaction. It wasn’t like Kaylee to do that. Only it didn’t matter in the end if she still pushed him away.
“No,” he finally said.
She crossed her arms. “You don’t have a choice. I told you I didn’t want anything serious. Nothing’s changed—”
“Everything’s changed.”
“—and I don’t want us stuck in a relationship because I got pregnant. It’s not right for either of us. And it’s especially not right for the baby. He or she deserves parents who love each other.”
Daring Wes: Cade Brothers Series Page 17
