Jacob looked at her for a moment. She really was a beautiful woman. “Answers to our questions aren’t always real clear—and frankly, I’ve learned that even when I know the whys and hows, it doesn’t stop me from hurting.”
“But it might help me stop reliving it,” Helaina said in a distant voice. “Sometimes I imagine their final moments—even though I wasn’t there physically. I read the reports and demanded all the details until the police were so tired of me they simply gave in. It was gruesome, and sometimes I wish I’d heeded their warning and left well enough alone.”
“Did they ever catch the men who committed the murders?” Jacob asked.
“Yes, but it didn’t help as much as I’d hoped. I had thought that once they were caught and tried, convicted, and punished, that my life would go on—that I would feel satisfied.”
“But you didn’t?”
“No. Well, my life went on, but the feeling of satisfaction was absent. No matter that the men were in jail—my family was still dead.”
“That’s why revenge never works.”
“But I wasn’t just seeking revenge. I wanted justice.”
“There you go with justice again. I don’t think you even understand the word. Justice suggests impartiality, and you show no signs of that.”
She glared at him. “Justice is what our legal system is about—it’s what this country was founded on. It’s all I want in life—it’s what I fight for.” Jacob thought for a moment she might get up and leave, but instead she composed herself and squared her shoulders. “This isn’t about me or justice—it’s about Leah and Mr. Kincaid.”
“I can’t do anything about them right now, except pray—which I have been doing ever since we heard about the ship going down. But I think we need to go back to the issue at hand, and the point is, often people mistake revenge for justice. They think they’ll feel better if they can see their offenders behind bars or even put to death. But it doesn’t change the fact that they are hurting. I’ve found that offering mercy and forgiveness frees me from much of that pain. It also helps me to find a new direction for my life.”
Helaina’s voice took on a raw edge. “As I’ve said before, people who break the law deserve to face the penalty. Mercy is a matter left up to the courts. I will never understand your beliefs that people should just get off free and clear because they ask to be forgiven.”
“Well, forgiveness is something we do on our part. We have control of forgiveness—whether we’ll give it or withhold it. I can forgive the man who steals from me, but the court might still sentence him to time in jail. You could choose to forgive the men who murdered your family, but they would still need to pay the penalty for their crime.”
“I could never forgive them,” Helaina said bitterly. “And don’t bring up that story from the Bible again. Just because God has decided to forgive mankind their sins if they accept His Son, doesn’t mean that I should have to forgive as well. I cannot agree with that. It’s just not that simple.”
“I never said it was simple,” Jacob replied. “Forgiveness is a decided effort. It doesn’t come easy for most.”
“I would venture to say it doesn’t come to most . . . period.”
Jacob fell silent. Helaina’s pain was visible in her expression. He’d certainly never meant to hurt her, but at the same time, he believed God had put the two of them together for a reason. “Why did you come to Alaska? Honestly.”
The pain left her face as a look of surprise seemed to cause her to tense. “You know why I came. You know all about the expedition.”
“And I know you said that you wanted to make your husband proud, but I get the feeling there’s more to it than that. I’ve always been rather good at discerning people, and you have hidden motives, Helaina. I’ve known that from the start, but I didn’t want to say anything.”
Her face flushed crimson at this comment. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“But you do. I can see that now, more than ever. If you can’t be honest with me, then I’d just as soon you not come back to Last Chance. I hate lies, and now I feel confident that you are lying to me.”
Helaina cleared her throat nervously. “Look . . . that is. . . . you simply do not need to pry into my life. I’ve done nothing but honor the agreement we had. I’ve learned to handle the dogs to the best of my ability. I ran your store and kept your house, again because of the agreement. I upheld my part of the bargain and gave you no reason to distrust me.”
“You lied about the expedition. That much I already know.”
He looked at her hard, hoping she might feel intimidated.
“You’re just upset because of Leah,” Helaina said, crossing her arms. She was wearing one of her southern outfits, as Jacob called them. A blue wool skirt and jacket with a high-collared white blouse. She looked every bit the prim and proper lady.
“I am upset about Leah, but that isn’t marring my judgment in the least. There was never a second summer expedition planned. The first expedition was in trouble, and they had to cancel and turn back by the middle of June.”
“But the plan . . . prior to that trouble . . . before they cancelled their exploration, was to have a second expedition,” Helaina said hesitantly.
“That’s a lie, Helaina.”
She said nothing, but Jacob could see she was uncomfortable. He almost felt sorry for her. Almost. “Helaina, there was no telegraph service in either Nome or St. Michael when you suggested you’d received word from the expedition association. Service was out—I know because I wanted to send a telegram. There was also not enough time for you to have received a post or letter, because there hadn’t been a mail ship in for days when you suggested having heard from the group. I believe you made it up to serve some ulterior purpose. What I want to know is, why? Why were you so determined to get Jayce Kincaid to Seattle?”
Helaina stood up. “I don’t have to take this. I will not sit here and be accused like some common criminal.”
“It’s a sin to lie. You know that, right? It’s one of the Ten Commandments.”
“The commandment you refer to states, ‘Thou shalt not bear false witness against your neighbor,”’ Helaina said angrily. “I did not bear false witness against anyone.” With that she stormed off.
Jacob watched after her for several minutes. He had no more answers than when he’d started, but at least now she knew that he suspected her. It would be interesting to see what she did from this point.
————
Jayce and Leah struggled to row the lifeboat up the coast toward what they hoped would be Sitka. Leah thought she had never been so tired. She tried hard to keep up with Jayce’s rhythm but knew it was impossible.
Bethel rested but was fully awake. She had continued to improve after several days of rest. Leah had found some plants to ease Bethel’s condition, but the quality had been rather poor due to the onset of the cold weather. They had also been fortunate to gather enough fish to eat well. Eating something substantial had given them all renewed hope and energy, and now they were anxious to move on. By all calculations they had been missing for just over two weeks, and they knew that their families were probably frantic.
“We’ll rest in just a few more minutes,” Jayce promised.
“That would . . . be good,” she gasped out, her arms burning from the strain.
Jayce seemed only then to realize how tired she was. “I guess we could rest now,” he said. “I didn’t realize how hard I was pushing you. I’m sorry.”
“It’s all right. I don’t want our families to worry any longer than they have to. We’ve already been gone too long.”
“I know the delay was due to me,” Bethel said apologetically.
“We were all exhausted,” Jayce answered. “I couldn’t have gone on without food and water. None of us could have. Besides, the weather caused us trouble more times than not. It isn’t a good time of the year to travel in Alaska.”
“I know Jacob will understand,” L
eah replied, still trying to regain her wind. “Karen and Adrik too. They will all say we did the right thing in renewing our strength, waiting out the weather, and making sure Bethel had a chance to recover.”
“My heart has always been weak. I suppose this will be my last trip of any consequence.”
“Maybe your family will come to you now,” Leah said smiling.
Bethel nodded, then seemed to think of something else. “I know Leah has a brother, but have you any siblings, Mr. Kincaid?”
Jayce frowned. “I do. I have an older sister and brother, as well as a younger brother. Well, he’s younger, but not by much. See, we’re twins.”
“How unusual. That must have been interesting growing up.”
“Especially since Chase insists on getting himself into trouble at every turn.”
Leah looked at Jayce and shook her head. “I didn’t know you had a twin.”
“Well, it never seemed important to bring up. We’re as different as night and day, even though we’re identical in appearance. My biggest trouble is that Chase insists on blaming me for everything wrong in his life. He even blames me that he’s the youngest. We have a rather unusual situation in fact. I was born at 11:57 P.M. on December 31st, in the year 1882. Chase was born at 12:04 A.M. on January 1st, 1883. We’re twins born in entirely different years.”
“That is quite interesting,” Bethel declared. “But I thought twins had an unusual sense of connection. You two were never close?”
“Never. He hated me from the beginning. He blamed me for the trouble he had in school—for the problems he caused our parents. He even blamed me for the death of our mother.”
“Why?” Leah couldn’t imagine why a brother would act in such a way. “Why would he do that?”
Jayce began rowing again. “When my father died, my siblings went through their inheritances and then started taking what they could from our mother. My mother was rather naïve and gave generously to anyone who asked. By the time I realized what they were doing, she was nearly destitute. She had accumulated debts, and we had to sell her home in order to satisfy her bankers. Losing everything that reminded her of our father was more than she could bear. She was also distraught over the fact that Chase had gotten himself in trouble, and there was no money with which to bail him out. She grew quite sick with worry about him being in jail.”
“And how does Chase figure that to be your fault?” Leah asked.
Jayce’s face darkened. “Because I had the money to get him out, and I wouldn’t do it. I knew he’d run if I did. I tried to reason with our mother and explain that jail was the best place for him—at least he’d be out of trouble there. But that wasn’t the way she saw it, for Chase made certain her thoughts were in conflict with mine. He would send her horrible letters telling her how awful his conditions were and how badly people treated him. Mother pleaded with me to help him. I finally told her that I would take her to the jail and let her see the situation for herself.”
“And did she go?” Bethel asked.
“Yes,” Jayce said, looking past them as though he could see it all being played out in the skies overhead. “I took her there and she saw him . . . saw that he was living quite well, playing cards with the guards and eating high on the hog. When he realized what I’d done, Chase was livid. He rushed at me with the intention of killing me—at least I believe that was his plan. The guards had to pull him off, while our mother screamed for everyone to stop. I took her home, and she went to her bed, never again to get out.”
“So Chase blames you for revealing the truth to her?” Leah asked.
“And for that truth taking her life.”
“That is a sad story, indeed,” Bethel said, clucking sympathetically. “What of your older siblings?”
“They blamed me as well. I was our father’s favorite, and they hated me for that, seeking in turn to destroy my standing with our mother—although she thought equally well of each of us. It never bothered her to realize her children had taken advantage of her—or that she had given up everything she owned so that they would have whatever they wanted. She loved us all—right up to the end.”
Bethel shifted and sat up to stretch her body. “A mother’s love—the most precious of all earthly commodities. You cannot buy it or sell it, yet everyone desires it. Oh my! Look!”
Leah scanned the shores in the direction Bethel pointed. A dozen or so Tlingit Indians stood on the beach watching them. Leah stood. The boat rocked wildly, but she maintained her balance. “We need your help,” she called in their native tongue. “Our ship sank, and we are trying to get to Sitka.” She looked to Jayce and saw the relief in his expression. “We’re saved. They’ll know how to help.”
————
Helaina paced her room in maddening steps. How dare he! How dare he accuse her of lying? She didn’t care that it was true; she only felt that he had no right to interfere in her job. Now he would tell Jayce—if they found him at all—and her plans to talk him into heading to Seattle would be ruined. Not that I have any real idea for getting Jayce there anyway, she thought.
Not long after they’d arrived in Sitka, she had wired her brother with her concerns of whether Kincaid was even living. An hour ago she had added to the previous missives and told her brother that Jacob Barringer was suspicious of her—that he was now a real threat. Helaina hoped Stanley might offer her some insight or suggestion as to how to resolve it all.
Helaina had also mentioned her concerns about Jayce not being the right man. She had proof that suggested he’d been in two places at once. Not only with her information related to England, when Jayce supposedly stole from the British Museum, but also the situation with the Homestead and Jayce’s supposed help with the dogs. The only answer was that there had to be someone who resembled Jayce. Perhaps a brother—maybe a cousin or someone else.
“The man I saw in Nome did not fit the patterns and attitudes of the man my brother wrote about. Jayce Kincaid seemed quite helpful and good. He showed no signs of breaking the law or of taking advantage of other people. Plus, he couldn’t have been on the expeditions as Captain Latimore suggested. Jayce spent the summer with Leah,” she said aloud, trying to organize her thoughts. “It just didn’t make sense, unless there was another person.”
She had shared these concerns with Stanley as well. Now she would just have to wait for some kind of direction from her brother.
A knock sounded on her door, and Helaina nearly jumped a foot. It came again, only this time harder and louder. “Open up, Mrs. Beecham.”
Helaina recognized Jacob’s voice and hurried to do as he said.
“What’s wrong? Have you had word?”
“No. They brought in a couple of bodies about an hour ago, but neither of them was Leah or Jayce. However, the weather has settled, and I’m going out in search of them.”
“I’ll change my clothes.”
“You’re staying here,” Jacob replied without room for argument. “I just wanted to let you know where I’ll be.” He turned to leave, and Helaina followed him into the hallway.
“How can you just leave me here? I came to help you.”
“I don’t trust your help.” With that he stormed off.
Helaina hurried to change her clothes. She might still catch him at the dock. She didn’t want him going to hunt for Jayce and Leah without her. He would no doubt warn Jayce about her, and then the man probably wouldn’t even return to Sitka.
Another knock sounded at her door. She smiled, anticipating his return. She sauntered to the door feeling rather triumphant.
She opened the door. “I thought you were . . .” It wasn’t Jacob.
“I have a telegram for you,” the young man declared. “In fact, I have three telegrams for you.”
Helaina frowned. “Very well.” She went to get her purse.
“I never saw anyone get three telegrams at once.”
“Well, it’s really none of your concern,” she snapped, knowing she was losing precious time.
She dismissed the boy quickly and opened the messages.
They were all from her brother, and he was not happy.
Get JK to Seattle. STOP. Use law in Sitka. STOP. I will notify. STOP.
The next one was just as insistent.
JK is a killer. STOP. Do not worry about his innocence or guilt.
STOP. We have all the proof we need. STOP. Get him to Seattle. STOP.
The final one was more of the same.
Have wired the law in Sitka. STOP. They will assist. STOP. If JK is living take to Seattle immediately. STOP. Team will aid you there. STOP.
Helaina tossed the telegrams into the trash and grabbed her coat. She had to try to reach Jacob before he left town. If he reached Jayce first, there would be no hope of taking him in without a fight.
Chapter Twenty-four
J acob felt the crushing weight of defeat as their boat made its way to the docks in Sitka. He noted that the steamer Victoria was in the harbor and wondered if she might be heading to Nome. Soon no one would be risking a trip there.
Jacob sighed. The Victoria couldn’t help him even if they were headed in the right direction. He still didn’t know where Leah was. He had been out on the water for nearly forty-eight hours and hadn’t found anything. It was as if the sea had swallowed up all evidence of Orion’s Belt and her passengers.
“Will we go out again tomorrow?”
He looked at Helaina, not in the least happy to have her on board. She had come only moments before the ship’s owner cast off and insisted she be allowed to help with the search. When she stood her ground and refused to leave the deck, Jacob finally relented but told her she was on her own. He wanted nothing more to do with her.
Even now he walked to the other side of the deck, anxious to be rid of Helaina. There were few things he despised as much as lying. The fact that she was caught in her lies and still continued to perpetuate them bothered him even more. Even on this journey she tried to explain away what had happened in Nome by telling Jacob that he’d misunderstood her meaning when she’d said that she’d gotten word about the expedition. She claimed she’d known that a second expedition was being planned even before coming to Nome.
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