‘I don’t tend to go around comparing my cock to other men’s, Alex. I have no idea if it’s normal or not.’
‘It’s big, it looks big.’
‘Focus on me, Alex. Kiss me until you’re relaxed.’
‘That could be a long time,’ she told me, as I felt her climb back up to straddle me and her breast brushed past my mouth. I lashed out with my tongue, catching her nipple, making her gasp. I did it again, laving the stiff nub and taking in all of the indents and peaks of her areola, until she pushed her chest forward and let me suck her nipple into my mouth. Her fingers slid into my hair, tugging and scratching as she gasped and moaned and started to writhe against my cock, coating me in her slickness. ‘Castle, oh God, Castle.’
When her hand moved down and grasped my length, I released her breast with an audible pop to grit my teeth. There was no way I was climaxing in under a minute like last night.
‘Shit,’ I hissed as I felt her angle me and settle me against her heat.
‘Be gentle,’ she pleaded.
‘Slide down onto me, Tiger, you’re in charge.’
‘Oh!’ Her gasp coincided with mine as I felt her warmth envelop my engorged head. Her muscles were contracting so tightly it was like I was being squeezed in a vice. I pushed my head forward and found her throat and started to kiss it, working my way around to her neck. She began to relax and lowered herself gently taking the next few inches.
‘Jesus,’ I groaned. It was going against every fibre of my being, not being able to move, or clutch her hips as I drove myself forcibly up inside of her.
‘I feel … so full,’ she exclaimed.
‘Take more of me, then start to rock, just like you did last night,’ I ordered. Her hands moved to my shoulders and I felt her muscles give as she opened up and took my full length with a shudder. The sound of our heavy breathing was even drowning out the nocturnal surround sound of the island. My torso was slick with perspiration, the efforts of my restraint, and my excitement. How the hell had I got here? I was only too aware that what Alex was doing now was the most incredible gift. ‘Are you okay, Tiger?’
‘Yes.’ Her lips crashed back down onto mine as she started to move. Tentative rocks that picked up speed, my hips following and flexing in unison. It was like being encased in tight, hot, wet velvet. As if her very core had been sculpted to fit my cock. Our lips and tongues moved faster, our hips following suit. Heated cries left her mouth as wild grunts escaped mine. I tried to focus on the procedure for firing up my seaplane, anything to stop me thinking about my desperate need to come, but she was making it so goddamn hard.
‘Alex, you’re wrecking me,’ I groaned as she cried out my name.
‘I’m going to … I’m so close, Castle.’
Our chests slid against each other as she rode me with abandonment, unfettered and unburdened by her past, completely lost in the moment. I choked up to think what a huge deal this was to her and that she’d chosen me.
‘Alex.’ Her name came out garbled as my balls tightened and white heat spread up my spine. I was gone, past the point of no return as I thrust my hips up to meet her downward strokes. Her body quaked against mine, my cock coated in her arousal as her muscles milked me to a forceful climax, and she shattered with a scream loud enough to wake the entire island. My body slumped down into the chair, completely boneless as she collapsed against me. I could feel her heart pounding as erratically as mine was, as we fought to catch our breath. ‘Fuck,’ I uttered.
I wanted to do that with her forever. I pulled my mind back from wherever it was currently orbiting and my body regained its form. She lay on my chest, her slight body still trembling. Her head was on my shoulder, with her face nuzzling into my neck as her muscles twitched around my cock, which hadn’t yet deflated. I twisted my head and kissed her temple gently.
‘Let me hold you, Tiger,’ I whispered. I was a goddamn pussy. I wanted every inch of her against me, in my arms. I wanted to feel her surrender to me completely, safe in the knowledge that I’d never hurt her.
‘I have to go.’
I winced at her response, then at the way she dragged herself off me, my cock ricocheting off my hard abdomen as the cool night air wrapped around it, replacing her snug warmth.
‘Alex.’ I acted instinctively and opened my eyes as I went to sit up, and took in a shocked gasp as I saw her standing naked in front of me.
‘I told you to keep your eyes closed, I told you,’ she cried, anguish saturating her tone. She grabbed her shirt off the floor and started to run, pulling it around her frame as she did, leaving her knickers on the ground at my feet.
I yanked my hands out of their soft restraints and roared in fury as I stood up and yanked my trunks up.
No wonder she didn’t want to wear a bikini or crop top. She had scars all over her breasts, imprints of teeth marks, but even worse, emblazoned across her flat stomach, looking like it had been badly etched repeatedly with a knife, was a single word.
“King.”
Chapter Thirteen
Alex
I CURLED UP ON the bed and sobbed. I’d just experienced something so powerful and magical, only for it to be ruined the moment he opened his eyes. He was turned off me, just how I expected him to be. I couldn’t even look at myself naked in the mirror without hating what I saw. How could I expect anyone else to feel differently?
My body jolted as I heard loud banging on the door. I sat up, pulling my knees to my chest, and wiped my eyes.
‘Alex, open the door.’ Castle’s voice was firm and insistent.
‘Go away, please go away,’ I yelled. I’d gone there tonight to show him my strength, not for him to see my weakness.
‘I’m not going anywhere. I’ll knock all night if I have to. Open the goddamn door, Alex.’
‘I just want to be left alone.’
‘Not going to happen, not tonight.’
‘Please,’ I pleaded, some more tears of frustration burning my cheeks as they fell.
‘Was I shocked to see that, of course I was, I’m bloody human, Alex. You think witnessing that kind of torture would just glide off me like water off a duck’s back? I hate the bastard for what he’s done to you, but you’re still the most beautiful fucking thing I’ve ever seen in my entire life. If you thought some scars would affect the way I feel about you, you don’t know me very well.’
‘Castle.’ My bottom lip trembled with emotion as I buried my face in my arms. I’d never wanted anyone to see Richard’s name on my stomach. He used to laugh as he cut into it while I was handcuffed to the bed, telling me he was branding me as his, that no other man who saw the mark would want me. And I’d believed him. Part of me still did, despite what I was hearing.
‘Painting a picture,’ Castle called. ‘I’m going to use my key to open the door, then I’m going to pick you up and hold you until you finish crying this out. I’m going to keep telling you how beautiful and strong you are, because you seem so damn obstinate in refusing to see it. You might wear his mark, Alex, but you’re not his property anymore. You’re no one’s property. Your body and heart are yours to give away as and when you choose. You’ve already given me your body, and you’re goddamn stuck with me until I can convince you to trust me with your heart, because Christ knows you’ve already stolen mine.’
I gasped as I heard a floorboard creak and looked up to see Castle standing at the foot of the bed, virtually naked but for those tight swimming trunks of his. He was magnificent, not just his ripped body, but the way he understood me, and adapted to take care of me in a way that didn’t terrify me. He was the whole package, and for some insane reason he wanted me, warts and all.
‘I’m falling in love with you, Alex. I’m just asking for the chance to take your hand and make you fall with me,’ he said softly, squeezing my heart in a tight vice.
‘Castle, I …’ I shook my head, words frozen in my throat, which was clogged with a whole host of emotions.
‘I’m just painting a picture, the
way you like, so that you know what’s coming. You don’t have to say anything in return, just trust that I’m not him. I couldn’t hurt you any more than I could my own daughter. You might have King etched into your stomach, but I already have Bishop etched into my heart and that’s where a brand counts.’
‘You’re making me cry again,’ I snuffled, dragging my wet sleeve across my soaked face. No one had ever said anything so nice, or so heartfelt, to me before. I so desperately wanted to give him my heart in return, but while Richard was out there it felt like it was still prisoner, wrapped up in chains, anchored to him.
‘So cry, part of a relationship is being there when someone needs you. I’m right here, Alex.’
‘A … relationship?’ I sniffed, desperately trying not to cry again as I looked up at him.
‘Yes, a relationship. Like it or not, however unconventional it might be, or how fast it’s developing, we’re in one, Alex. Take some of my strength when you need more, I’ve got enough for both of us.’
I swallowed the lump in my throat and nodded. Seconds later I was scrambling across the bed and throwing myself into his arms. When they gently wrapped around me I let out a howl of anguish, but I clung to him even harder, pushing through the painful association barrier and accepting his comfort.
‘You’re safe, Tiger, you’re safe,’ he whispered as he carefully lowered himself onto the bed. He lay on his back as I lay curled up on his chest, his arms banded around me, but loose enough for me to pull out of his embrace if I wanted to.
I didn’t.
For the first time in forever, I did feel safe. I thought what Richard had turned me into would make everyone else turn away. I was wrong. Castle, and Ester, were showing me that I’d been so wrong about so very many things. That’s what years of abuse did to you. It warped your sense of normality, but slowly, little by little, the fog that had clouded my judgement for over a decade was starting to recede.
‘Don’t leave me,’ I whispered, my arms wrapped tightly around his left bicep.
‘Sleep, there’s nowhere I’d rather be right now,’ he replied as he let his lips linger on the top of my head.
Richard
I paced the inside of the flat like a caged animal. I might as well be back behind bars I was feeling so trapped. But it wasn’t safe for me to leave unless absolutely necessary. From time to time I’d spotted the guy that had chased me, casing the area. He’d even been up the fire escape to check the door to my hideout hadn’t been forced. I’d never have imagined that I’d be grateful for the skills learned in prison, but it seemed as if my lock-picking classes had afforded me the freedom to live here undetected. I only ventured out by cover of darkness when I needed to top up my supplies, and made doubly sure to check no one was watching or following me.
As well as frustration that she’d been gone for so long, I was suffering from fucking nicotine withdrawal. I didn’t dare smoke in the flat, or make much noise, in case the neighbours were alerted to my presence. Getting her back was my primary goal and remaining here undetected was paramount. So, I whiled away the hours by silently working out, pummelling the mattress, making sure I’d never be as weak as I’d been during those first few months inside. Months when I’d been unable to fight off the hardened lifers.
I cricked my neck, my backside automatically clenching tightly at the memory of the first time I’d been raped. I’d never felt pain, or humiliation, like it. The only thing that got me through all the times they’d held me down and fucked me, was the thought of what I’d do to Izzie when I finally got my hands back on her.
When I was strong enough to fight the other inmates, they’d turned their attention to the weaker fish in the pond. And I’d found a new way to release my aggression. Fucking a whimpering man as I pinned him down, made me feel even more powerful than the times I’d forced myself on Izzie, or any of the women I’d unsuccessfully tried to dominate before her. I’d struck gold finding such a naïve girl in that Glasgow club. Poor Izzie, all alone in the world, so desperate to be loved, had let me manipulate her into becoming my plaything so easily.
The prison shrink had tried to get to the bottom of “what was wrong with me.” There was nothing wrong with me. It was everyone else. I’d grown up seeing my dad beating my mum, forcing her to submit to him sexually. She never left him. She never fought back. She never even admitted it, but I knew that secretly she loved it. Why else would she stay? That was normal. Everything else to me was abnormal. I just didn’t understand how men got off on plain old vanilla sex. It did nothing for me. Some women just loved being treated like the inferior sex, and when Izzie finally came back to London, I was going to make her love it by reminding her what she was missing. But I needed something to keep me focussed. I needed to know where she was and when she was coming back. I needed a goal, instead of endless days of my hopes being dashed repeatedly with each passing hour.
I slipped out under cover of the darkness the early winter nights afforded. Watching the gallery from the shop door opposite, the risk of getting caught gave me the thrill that I’d been missing these last few weeks. As soon as Izzie’s stupid assistant was busy with some customers, I pulled my hoodie around my face and slipped into the shop, pretending to admire the art on the walls. She was so busy talking that she didn’t see me plant the baby monitor on top of one of the cupboards, before I headed out and back to the safety of my flat.
Now Izzie had nowhere to hide without me knowing. Even better, I’d be forewarned of when she was coming back. Once I knew, it didn’t matter whether it was six months away, or a year. It was the not knowing that was driving me crazy, making me wish she was in front of me so that I could take out my aggression on her instead of the mattress.
Once I knew, the countdown could begin. Then her days of freedom were numbered.
Alex
The Next Morning
I finished my session with Ester and felt as if a crushing weight had been removed from my chest. Castle had seen the worst of me, and he still wanted me. Even though Richard was still out there, as well as indelibly marked on my skin, I felt as if I’d just taken the first steps to becoming truly free of his hold over me.
I’d slept with Castle. Not just the incredible sex on his terrace, but physically slept as he held me. And it was the best night’s sleep I’d ever had. I’d felt loved and protected. But that didn’t mean I could stop in my quest to protect myself.
Ester bid me goodbye at the door and I warmed from the inside out to see him standing with his back to me.
‘I don’t care, I want him found and I want him fucking found now,’ he grated out, his muscles taut with tension. ‘He’s not trained in covert ops. He can’t have covered his tracks that well and just bloody vanished. Next time you call I want some goddamn answers, understood?’
I lingered awkwardly behind him, sure I wasn’t supposed to have overheard that conversation. I felt guilt that my issues had suddenly become his, but a sense of wonder at how much he cared and the lengths he was going to in order to keep me safe.
‘Hi,’ I said quietly. I watched the tension in his shoulders vanish in an instant, and when he turned around his smile stunned me with its warmth and brilliance.
‘Hi,’ he replied, holding my gaze for a moment, before his swept over my face, as if he were trying to read my emotions. ‘Okay?’
‘Yes,’ I said sincerely, giving him a bright smile in return. ‘Thank you.’
‘Ready to train?’
‘Ready to fight,’ I replied, accepting the hand that he offered me. He squeezed it as we started to walk the path towards his house.
‘I thought I might have scared you off with what I said last night,’ he said quietly. ‘Things are moving fast, I know that. I’d never have imagined that a month after meeting you we’d be standing here, with me going back on all of my rules and beliefs, and feeling like my life won’t be complete unless you’re in it.’
‘They are moving fast, but for once trust me, Castle. I know fear and
that’s not what I’m feeling right now.’ I shifted my fingers to lace them between his and he nodded and exhaled a sigh of relief as he scrubbed his free hand over his face.
‘Rosie is desperate to meet you again.’
‘Again?’ I asked, glancing up at him. ‘She remembers me?’
‘She does,’ he confirmed with a nod, a smile tugging up the corners of his sexy lips. ‘She didn’t remember your name, but you made quite an impression on her.’
‘She told me I was pretty, but that you had told her she was the most beautiful girl in the whole wide world.’
‘Well she is, but lately she has a rival,’ he said as his gaze slid over to mine, making me blush. ‘You could join us for dinner?’
‘But I thought … you said you didn’t want her to meet anyone until you …’
‘I know what I said and I meant it then, but I remember everything that I said to you last night too, Alex. My wants and needs are evolving faster than I could have ever imagined. But I also told you that for you, I’m prepared to be patient, so I’ll understand if you feel it’s too soon.’
‘If you’re okay with it, then so am I,’ I replied, feeling my heart skip a beat at the thought of seeing her angelic little face again.
‘Thank God, or I would have had to tell her why it was okay for me to break a promise I made to her. I’d have probably ended up with another facial scar.’
‘Do I need lessons in child defence? She sounds lethal,’ I laughed.
‘She’s stubborn and pig-headed, which she gets from me, but she has the biggest heart and doesn’t know how not to love.’
‘Let’s hope that never changes,’ I stated wistfully.
‘Harder,’ he yelled.
‘I’m scared of hurting you,’ I protested, shaking my aching arm.
‘Do you think Richard will give a fuck about your feelings? Hit me!’
‘Stop making me mad by bringing him up,’ I yelled, throwing another punch his way, which he effortlessly dodged.
Inescapable Page 21
