by Erica Penrod
Kip’s thoughts receded with the sound of an engine coming up through the trees, and by the volume of the machine, his solitude was about to be interrupted. This was private property, so that meant it was one of only a few people, and he was willing to bet he knew who it was. He lifted his face into the sun to absorb the last minute of seclusion.
Ben Morgan climbed out of his Ranger and sat down next to Kip. Like Kip, his dad came to this spot to clear his head. He leaned forward and rested his arms on his legs. “I thought I’d find you up here.” Ben lifted his hat, pushing back the thick waves of graying dark hair, and then pulled it down again. “Your mom’s worried about you.”
“Why?” Kip didn’t look at his father.
“We both are,” Ben said. “This TV show was supposed to be a one-time thing.”
“I know.” He scuffed at the dirt beneath his boots, stirring the dust into a tiny cloud. “But I didn’t know what else to do.”
“I get it.” He leaned back and folded his arms across his broad chest. Even in his early fifties, the state champion steer wrestler was still part of his physique. “Look.” Ben placed a hand on Kip’s shoulder. “Your mom and I both know why you’re doing this, and it’s for all the right reasons.”
Kip looked straight ahead, not wanting his father to see him struggle with his emotions. Jaxon’s crooked smile flashed in his mind.
“It’s important to help out a friend, but you can’t give everything all the time.”
Kip knew how it all looked, but few people understood the whole situation. Up until now, he’d kept his friend’s story close to his chest. His dad would be discreet; he could count on Ben for that. “The money from the first season was enough to pull them out of the red, but another season will give the ranch a little stability, and now he’s about to become a father.”
“Wait,” Ben said. “I thought he and Janie got a divorce?”
“They did, and she found out she was pregnant not long after.” Kip couldn’t imagine being kept apart from his child. The idea ate up his friend and pushed him to put together the whole reality television show.
Ben folded his arms. “I didn’t realize that.”
“Not many people do. He’s managed to keep it from the producers, but it’s only a matter of time.” Kip shook his head. It was true, the show’s new season wasn’t what he’d planned, but it was filmed, and that was that. Shooting the first season, Kip was impressed by the operation, eager to learn about a foreign topic. Once he understood the process, it no longer intrigued him, and the second season felt like a suit and tie he couldn’t take off.
The premise of the show was to give the audience a glimpse of what being a cowboy meant in today’s world. They wanted three young men with various backgrounds for the cast, but whose livelihoods involved a cowboy way of life. A producer approached Jaxon; someone at the network saw an interview of the champion saddle bronc rider at a PRCA rodeo, and while he wasn’t tall, he wasn’t short in good looks and charisma. They contacted him immediately, and he pointed them in Kip’s direction.
“And of course, he won’t take any money from me, not even a loan.” Kip slapped at his knee.
“As close as you are, I thought maybe he’d let you help him out,” Ben said.
Kip and Jaxon met along the rodeo circuit in high school, where they’d competed in a few of the same events and even for a few of the same girls. Jaxon stood on a hay bale to look him in the eye, but he was tall in attitude, and Kip had two scars to prove it.
“But I guess we men have our pride, and your paycheck is going to good use with the local charities,” Ben said. He touched his son’s shoulder. “Your mom and I will support you in any way we can. Whatever you need, just let us know.”
“Thanks, Dad,” Standing up, Kip rested his hands on his hips. “It’ll be fine. I just don’t like the idea of not being around as much and helping with the business. Plus, the girls’ rodeo season is starting.”
“It’s a good thing we’ve got Cassie,” Ben said. “I know it’s sure taken a lot of the pressure off your mom having her here.” His eyes smiled right along with his mouth. “And those kids of hers are cute little colts. It’s nice to have little ones in the house again.” Ben placed his hand on Kip’s knee and shook it with care. “I better get going.”
Ben got into his side-by-side. “Don’t stay too long,” he called to Kip. “Mom’s planning on all of us for dinner, and I think the girls want to work the cutting horses tonight.” He pulled up next to the log, “And they could use some herding help.” Shifting into reverse, he swung back around. He waved at his son as he started down the trail.
When the engine noise drifted into the trees, and nature orchestrated its simplistic sounds, Kip’s thoughts shouted, each one demanding to be heard. He stretched his arms above his head, wishing he could go back a few months ago and dig his heels into the ground when the director, Miley Rhodes, let it be known that Kip would be getting a female co-star. The success of the first season meant that Miley had to find a way to bring something new to the story, and for Kip, that was five-foot-nine rodeo princess named Austyn Macoy all the way from her daddy’s ranch in—you guessed it—Austin, Texas.
He was under contract and couldn’t mention her to his family or friends until it aired. Part of Kip’s original contract stated that only his home and ranch in Texas would be allowed for filming, and his family’s business was off limits. Both Ben and Kip felt it was important to keep Grace and the girls away from the limelight. His father was the only family member allowed to be filmed, and therefore the only person who knew about Austyn.
Kip climbed on the four-wheeler. Even though Austyn was a rhinestone noose around his neck, she was the least life-threatening shackle at the moment—not when he knew what he did about Cassie’s past. Not when the information he had could devastate Cassie and possibly bind him to the one person she might never forgive, and that alone just might kill him.
5
Cassie balanced herself on the top rail of the fence surrounding the arena that ran along the mountainside. The barn stood sentinel to the west, offering reprieve from the setting sun. To the east were roping shoots and a pasture beyond that. The house and yard were some distance to the north.
Ryder and Rhett played behind her with ropes of their own. A plastic miniature steer with exaggerated horns and swinging hind legs kept them entertained as Cassie watched the girls prepare to practice their cutting event.
When Cassie got here, she knew a little about rodeo, but she’d never heard of “cutting.” The word brought all sorts of images to her mind. Grace explained it to her the first time she watched the girls practice.
“The sport evolved from old-time American cowboys who needed to separate their branded cattle from the others in a roundup. The horses ‘cut’ a cow from the herd, and the object is to keep it separated.”
Now, after seeing it for herself several times a week, Cassie understood a little more and enjoyed watching the practices. She grinned at Skyler as she rode her horse into a small herd of cattle. Ben was in the corner next to the herd on a big gray horse. Jack, the stable manager, sat in the opposite corner on a little sorrel mare. Ben and Jack were called “herd help,” whose job was to keep the herd calm and quiet. In the front corners were Grace and Kip, called “turn back help.” They helped keep the cow in front of the cutter and turned it back towards the herd when the rider was finished.
“Skyler,” her father said, “take a look at the little black one on your left. Looks like a good one.” Skyler turned and nodded, and her horse crept into the herd as they were huddled together along the back fence. In the middle, she parted them like a rock in the river while pushing several cows up towards the center of the arena. She held both reins in one hand, about six inches above the saddle horn.
“Good job,” Kip said. “Keep moving and get the one you want.” He spun his horse hard to the left blocking a red cow and sending it back into the herd. Grace, mounted on a dark bay, ushered
two mouse-colored cows back to the herd. Once Skyler trapped her intended target, she put her rein hand down on the horse’s neck, held on with the other, and then it was time to dance.
The horse sank its hind legs into the deep sand. His front legs dashed left to right, matched head to head with the black cow. The cow spun to the opposite direction. Cassie squeezed her eyes shut when the horse bolted from the ground, parallel to his prey, and made a hard stop to block the cow.
“That was great. Be sure to use your cow side leg when going across the pen,” Ben said.
The fact that Skyler wasn’t on the ground picking dirt from her teeth astonished Cassie. What impressed her more was that Skyler only cued the horse with her legs. Cassie determined that with a lot of practice she could ride like that, maybe even compete. The boys were well on their way, riding every day, and they could make it a family affair.
Thinking of her sons, she leaned her head back to make sure the twins were still roping. They were both busy swinging until they saw the galloping horse. The ropes hit the ground and they ran to the fence.
Cassie heard hooves in the dirt. When she turned, she saw Kip’s buckskin skid to a stop, followed by a cloud of dust. She lost her balance, but caught herself as the boys tried to crawl through the fence.
“We want to cutacow,” Ryder said, using cut-a-cow as one word.
“Don’t climb inside the fence,” Kip said, patting his horse’s neck.
“Boys, get over here,” Cassie said.
Rhett and Ryder stopped, but looked up at Kip with tears clearing a trail down their dirty cheeks.
Cassie saw Kip’s face soften with his voice. “Remember, I said that you need to practice riding on old Sunny for a while before you can cut, okay?”
Rhett wiped his nose with the back of his hand. “Okay.”
“How about as soon as Elle finishes her turn, I’ll take you for a ride?” Kip said. Both boys bobbed their heads up and down. Kip looked over at Cassie. “Is that alright with you?”
“Yes, that’s fine.” She looked down at the boys. “Go play until it’s your turn to ride.”
The boys returned to their roping dummy, and her eyes returned to Kip’s. They reminded her of the candy bar she once forgot on the dash of her Honda, a delicious, dark mess melting into places it shouldn’t. Admittedly, she craved chocolate more than she should, but when her waist expanded and she had to slide off the roof to fit in her jeans, she tried to avoid it.
“Cassie?”
Kip’s face came into focus. She swallowed. “Yes?”
“I asked if you liked Skyler’s ride.”
Cassie couldn’t interpret his expression, but knew he was thinking about more than his little sister’s ride. She worried he’d discover her addiction to chocolate. “Yeah, I did.”
He grinned. “She’s getting pretty good, huh? The horse is working real nice, too.”
She nodded, thinking maybe she should call Stacy tonight—there were certain things a girl needed to share with her best friend.
“Looks like Elle’s ready to start.” He nudged his horse. “Oh, by the way, you look nice today.” His dimples flashed. “And those boots look good on you.”
She felt giddy inside and didn’t know if it was the compliment or ending a conversation with Kip on a good note. Thank you, Skyler. The girl insisted Cassie take a pair of her boots for riding.
Dusk settled across the arena, and the incandescence of the setting sun made her mind feel hazy. She stared at Kip, feeling safe since his eyes were on Elle and the cattle. When he looked at her, she couldn’t predict her reaction. He made her feel edgy, too many emotions at once, and even when she liked it, she couldn’t predict where it would lead her. With just a few words, she could get upset; but when he walked away, she wanted to see him again.
Since Kip came home, Cassie could feel her heart in a way she hardly recognized. She couldn’t remember the last time she met someone who made her stop long enough to consider whether she liked the way he had an egg every morning for breakfast, or that she’d never seen him without a hat.
A ringing in the distance lured her from her shadowed mind. She hopped off the fence, taking her phone from her back pocket. It was her mother again. Cassie checked on the boys to her left before she pushed the button. She was apprehensive about answering the call after her last conversation with her mother. With each call, it became clearer that burying Danny was going to be a lot harder than putting him in the ground.
“Hi, Mom,” Cassie answered. She walked around the boys, kicking at the dirt beneath the grass. Her stomach felt hollow, but heavy at the same time as she waited for her mother’s reply. It was hard to believe that every time she spoke to her mother, another nail from the past was ripped from Danny’s coffin. But when she heard her mom say “Hi, honey,” Cassie knew one more nail was headed straight for her heart.
6
It was the first week of August, and Grace Morgan knew she had little time to get things in order so she could spend most of September working in the Lone Star State. It was good timing, she reminded herself, as she filled in dates, times, and places on her digital calendar, detailing each one so she could forward one to Cassie and keep several hard copies posted in the house. Rodeo season started in another week, and Ben miraculously managed to delegate and postpone a few things to be there for the girls. Kip said he could help, but she knew that could change with one phone call, and so she didn’t count on it.
That would give Grace the chance to show Cassie how things worked, the pace of running from one event to the other, and making sure the girls took time to eat and drink now and then. It was also important to her that her girls knew they had someone cheering them on in the stands.
She swiveled around in her chair and leaned her head back. Her fingers ran along the armrests; the deep, dark brown leather with natural highlights was her favorite color, and she loved the way it changed tones depending on where the sun hit the mountain. The view from her office made her mornings bright when the early rays streamed through the windows. Grace enjoyed this time of day, when just for a moment or two, she had it all to herself.
This was her space, and while she loved all the many inches of her home and had major influence with the design and décor, this was the one place she felt was just her own. The walls were deep with texture, while the shallow blue-gray color reminded her of a pebble at the bottom of the creek running through their property. The crown molding was white with intricate layers. Several antique jars, many of them clear, were lined up on the open shelves along the wall behind her desk and filled with office supplies. Her desk was a darker version of the wall color, distressed with a stain to give it the modern but aged look she loved. This piece had belonged to her mother, which had been a handmade gift from her grandfather. On the wall, directly in front of the desk, Grace had a variety of picture frames in shapes of every kind, and each was a soft hue of white, cream, gray, or made from barn wood. While the frames themselves were works of art, it was the photographs inside she found priceless.
Grace had each one printed in black and white and wished she could see everything as clearly as she did in these pictures on her wall. The simple lines kept her focused on the subject. Most of them were the people closest to her heart, and a few were of her other homes or favorite places she’d photographed to have with her when she wasn’t there. Grace stared at them, taking time to reflect on her life and wonder how a small-town Utah girl, raised with little money and more love than she could ever spend, ended up sitting in the office of one of her luxurious homes deciding just how much time they had before they relocated to their southern Utah home for the winter. She, of course, would be spending time in the Texas house, but her girls, along with Cassie and the boys, would be packing up sometime in the fall and …
Had she ever mentioned this to Cassie?
Grace didn’t get the chance to think too long. The phone rang, and she saw that it was Cassie’s mother, Camille. She smiled as she said “hell
o” to one of her favorite people. She could feel the wrinkles fall from her face, the baby weight she’d sworn to lose disappear, and she couldn’t remember what she was worried about thirty seconds ago. Over the years, life’s little realities and sometimes major calamities were handled over a sink full of dishes and the phone wedged between her ear and shoulder. However, this time, she heard Camille’s soft response and knew this conversation would give her enough time to clean all five bathrooms if the housekeeper hadn’t already gotten to them.
An hour later, Grace hung up the phone and turned her chair to gaze out the window. After all that Camille shared with her, she felt an overwhelming urge to run and find Cassie, take her in her arms, and hold on, because she knew that’s exactly what Camille would do if she were here.
“Grace?” she heard Cassie call her name. Working to conceal her emotions under a smile, she turned around to face the door.
The young woman leaning in the doorway looked much like the girl Grace met in college: tall, with wispy limbs that would sway in a continuous motion like her grandmother’s willow tree in a summer breeze. And like Camille, Cassie danced into a room, completely unaware of the artistry in her motions.
“Hi, what’s going on?” Grace asked. She picked up the neatly stacked papers and jogged them. Her French manicure blended in with the white paper, while the black words jumped up and down on the desk.
“You mentioned something yesterday about getting a calendar together, and I wondered if you’d had a chance to do that yet.” Cassie released her hands and put them in her pockets. “My mom called and is wondering about visiting sometime, and I figured I’d better get with you before I made any plans.”
“I talked to your mom just this morning, and she mentioned it,” Grace said. “I’d love to see her, too. Come in and we’ll go over things.”
