“You could at least put us together,” I complain to the nurse on the way back to my room.
“We put you on floors according to your procedures. Of all things. You getting in bed with him,” she huffed.
“Look. His mother just died and I wanted to comfort him.”
“Oh, I am sorry about that. I didn’t know.”
Sadness wraps around my heart like a vise. I keep seeing Kestrel’s face every time I close my eyes. He must’ve been alone with his mom when she passed. Kolson was most likely with Gabby. Dear God, to face that alone. Will the shit ever end?
***
Kestrel is released the next morning and comes to my room. He tells me he’s going to the house to check things out and to shower. He wears the clothes he had on Christmas Day and they have blood everywhere.
“Alone? Is Kolson going with you?”
“Yes. Gabby’s stable so he feels comfortable leaving her.”
“Good. I don’t want you going there alone.”
He kisses me good-bye and he seems so sad. They have funeral arrangements to make and I wonder when that will be.
My doctor checks on me and says I’m progressing well. Maybe I’ll be released in a few days.
My day is filled with lots of naps, but one highlight is John. His visit perks me up temporarily and pulls me out of my dark mood.
Flowers arrive from work. StrongMeds sends a massive arrangement that takes two women to carry it into my room. I don’t know what they were thinking, but I can’t imagine how I’ll get that thing home. I think I’ll send it over to the children’s wing so they can have it.
Harper flies in like a damn fighter jet. She throws herself at me and somehow I manage to escape injury.
“Fuck it all, Carter. What in the world is happening to you?”
“I’d like to know the same.”
“Damn. I almost fainted when I saw it on the news. Can you imagine?”
Why is she asking me that?
“Um, Harper, I almost got killed. Of course I can imagine.”
“Oh yeah. How silly of me.”
“Yeah. Silly.”
“Jeez. I’m sorry. I’ve just never known anyone that had their house shot up before.”
“Uh huh. Well, you do now.”
“So, what was it like?”
Is she kidding?
“Harper, Kestrel’s mother died. What do you think it was like?”
“Oh. That was sort of insensitive, wasn’t it?”
“Are you high or something?”
“You don’t have to get angry. I didn’t mean anything by it.” She pouts.
“Look. I’m tired. I’m sore. I was shot and I have this damn tube in my chest. My boyfriend was shot, his sister-in-law was shot, and his mother was killed. His house looks like a war zone. Yes, I do have to get angry. Maybe you need some sensitivity training.”
“Okay, you’re right. But have a little sympathy.”
“Wait. You want me to have sympathy for you?” Maybe I’m being a bitch here, but Kestrel and his family are the one’s suffering. Not Harper.
“Well, yeah. I was upset when I saw what happened.”
I can only shake my head. There’s only so much you can do with selfishness. “Okay, Harper, I feel sorry for you.”
That seems to brighten her day. Why am I just now seeing this side of her? Have I been blind to this egocentricity all these years? Or maybe I just didn’t want to see it. All I know is I don’t have time for this crap right now.
“Thanks for stopping by. I appreciate your worries and concerns. I’m so tired, though. You know—getting shot in the chest will do that.”
“Oh, I guess it will.”
“I think I need to sleep for a while.”
“Okay. Well, if you need anything, let me know. I’m around.”
“Thanks Harper.” And I watch her bop out of the room. I wonder if my parents saw through her. I really need to get some new friends.
***
Two days later, Kestrel and a nurse wheel me out of the hospital. A limo awaits me and we drive away. When the car doesn’t take the route to the house, I get curious.
“Where are we going?”
“Home.”
“This isn’t the way.”
“Yes, it is. I’ve a surprise.”
We pull up to a house. It’s a beautiful cream colored Charleston single styled home on Legare Street.
Kestrel turns to me and says, “Welcome home.”
Confusion clouds my mind. “I don’t understand.”
“You can’t live at the other house. It isn’t safe. I won’t take a chance in having you shot at again.”
“Oh, so we’ll stay here temporarily.” That makes sense.
He doesn’t answer. Instead, he gets out and assists me out. I’m moving rather slowly. Mario leads the way and opens the door. When I walk inside, it’s fully furnished and lovely. It’s hard not to smile.
“It’s beautiful, Kestrel.”
“I thought you’d approve.”
He helps me to the bedroom and I see my things are already here. But his aren’t.
“Where are your things?”
Mario leaves and Kestrel helps me sit. “Angel, we need to talk.”
Oh, boy. This isn’t good. I stop him with my hand.
“Is this the part where you tell me that it’s you and not me?” I ask.
His eye squeeze shut. “No. That’s not it at all.” Then he opens his eyes and pain radiates from them. Whatever he’s going to tell me hurts him. Bad.
“Say it then.”
“You’re not safe with me. That shooting. We don’t know who did it. It could be connected to the mob and if it is it could happen again. I can’t take that chance. Mom died. I won’t let that happen to you.”
My head spins and I can’t get a breath in. An invisible fist has grabbed my guts and is ripping them out of me. I know my lips are moving, but no words are coming out.
“This is your house. I’ve set up the rental, and if you like it, it’s yours. I’ll buy it for you. I only want you safe. I’ve assigned a team of bodyguards to watch you. Security cameras are being installed today and you will never be alone here.”
I hear him but I’m not sure how much I’m processing.
“I have to leave today for Manhattan. For Mom’s funeral. It’s private. She didn’t want anything other than that. It’ll only be Kol, Kade, and me.”
He doesn’t even want me to go with him. My ears buzz and I feel as though I’m going to faint. I won’t let myself. He can’t see how weak I am. I bite my lips to help, but they’re numb. Everything is numb. Except the excruciating pain in my heart.
“You understand, right? You see why I have to do this?”
No! I want to yell and scream at him. But I can’t even open my mouth.
“It’s because I love you more than anything in the world and your safety is the most important thing. When we find out who did this terrible thing … who killed my mother … I’ll come back for you. I promise, angel. I love you.”
He kisses the top of my head and walks away. I still can’t speak. The tears come after I hear the door close. Violent, wracking sobs. And then I remember. He doesn’t know. I wouldn’t let them tell him. About the baby.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Kestrel
Walking away from Carter is the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I have to do it, though. Until we find out who is behind this attack, I will not put her through any more danger.
Kolson and I depart for New York with Mom’s body on the plane. The funeral will be simple, as per her wishes. Kade will fly in for one day only. Stunned is the only word that can describe his reaction.
Only the three of us attend her service. A funeral home handles the cremation and we have her favorite minister say a few prayers. Kade is stone-faced as he stands between Kolson and me. I have so much on my mind I can barely sort out the fact that my brother is next to me for the first time in years. But I put
my arm over his shoulders and one thing I do notice is that he’s very muscular. He must be channeling his energy into working out.
When the minister finishes his prayers, an astounding thing takes place. Kade breaks into his own rendition of Amazing Grace. I haven’t heard him sing in so long, I turn to him and smile. It’s odd that I’m smiling at Mom’s funeral, but I know she would be, too. The song is perfect, as is Kade’s voice. Clear and strong, it resonates across the lake over which we stand. We are at one of Mom’s favorite places in Central Park—Oak Bridge on the Upper West Side, which spans Bank Rock Bay in the lake. It’s a blustery cold January day, with snow dotting the grounds nearby, but the song is perfect and it would please Mom to no end. Once Kade finishes, we sprinkle her ashes in the lake, and then walk back with heads bowed, to our waiting limo.
“I’m going to Denver in the morning with Kade,” Kolson informs me.
“Oh?”
“I have a meeting set with Drexel Wolfe and his firm.”
Drex Wolfe owns a one-of-a-kind PI firm in Denver. He has connections with the FBI and it’s rumored even with the CIA. He helped us before, in bringing Langston down, and I’m sure he’s the man to find out who’s behind the shooting.
“No. Gabby needs you. I’ll go. Besides, it’s my house, my deal,” I say.
“Yeah. You’re right. I need to be with my wife. He’s expecting me, so I’ll let him know that you’re coming instead.”
“Fine.”
“And Carter?”
“What about her?”
“How did she take everything?”
“Like you’d expect.”
“I’ll check on her for you.”
“Thanks. My only hope is she doesn’t hate me.”
“If it’s any consolation, Gabby didn’t hate me when I left her.”
“True. But Carter’s face. The way she looked. She didn’t say a word. I almost went back and brought her with me.”
“No. She’s safer there, without you. Drex will find who did this. He’s fast, too.”
Kade finally asks, “Are either of you going to fill me in on this?”
I give him the abridged version and he rubs his chin thoughtfully. “I know a shit ton of my brain cells have been fried, but I don’t know, man. I think your girl should be with you. If the mob wanted to strike back, why wait so long? It’s been over a year now. Why not fire back sooner? I think you’re on the wrong trail. Besides, wouldn’t they go after you on their own turf? Up here?”
Shaking my head, I say, “I disagree. I think they want to strike when we least expect. When we’re comfortable. And have our guard down.”
Kade shrugs. “You know best. This Wolfe. Sounds like he’s good. He’ll figure it out.”
I nod. “Yeah. And Carter’s protected.”
The next day, Kade and I fly to Denver.
“You look really happy, Kade.”
“I am. For the first time I can remember, that is. But I’m still not ready. You know. To rejoin the world.”
“I get it. Whenever you are, you always have a home. Just so you know.”
His eyes connect with mine. I’ve always thought his eyes were so knowing. Like they could see behind everything. Ice blue irises trap mine and he doesn’t blink as he nails me with his gaze.
“Stop blaming yourself.”
I let the air out I’ve held prisoner in my lungs.
“It’s hard. I’ve always felt like there was more I could’ve done for you. That I missed something. That I let you down … let you fall between the cracks.”
“It wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t Kolson’s fault. It was the Dragon’s. I was too fragile for what he did to me and needed the escape. I’ve learned that. But I should’ve chosen a different escape than what I did. You and Kolson tried. You did your best. Honestly, you two were the best brothers I ever could have had. And look at me—I’m alive and well now because of you two. After all that shit. So let it go, Kestrel. None of it was your fault. You were just a kid, like I was.”
“I envied you sometimes. I wanted to shoot that stuff into my veins, too. But I wasn’t brave enough.”
Kade let’s out a bitter laugh. “Well, be thankful for that. Coming off that shit was sheer hell.”
“You look strong.”
“Working out will do that. When you try to beat the shit out of your demons, it builds muscle. You should know that.”
Now it’s my turn to let out a bitter laugh. “Oh, yeah. That I do know. So, you sang at the service. Are you doing that again?”
“Oh, a little here and there.”
“Playing any music?”
Kade smiles. “I’m actually teaching. Volunteering at a church. Ironic, isn’t it? The former drug addict is giving music lessons at a Catholic church.”
We both chuckle.
“Hey, I think it’s great. Are you singing in the choir yet?”
Now he really laughs.
“You won’t believe it, but they asked me to. I had to refuse. Somehow, I think it’s sort of sacrilegious.”
“Why? Do they know your background?”
“Yeah.”
“Then if they don’t care, why should you?”
“I don’t know. It just seems a bit hypocritical.”
“Well, I can see why they’d want you. You sounded amazing. And I’m sure you still play beautifully, too.”
“It all came back. Like riding a bike. I thought maybe the drugs destroyed it all, but they didn’t.”
We’re both quiet for a bit, then I say, “Kade, I don’t think you’ll even return to the East coast. You seem to have found your place out there. And I’m happy for you. The great thing is you have your trust fund and you know Kolson and I will back you financially in whatever you choose to do.”
“Oh, I won’t take from you after they deem I’m safe to live on my own. I’ll be a rehab counselor or I’ve even thought of opening up a place for transitioning from inpatient services to outpatient. You know, getting former addicts back to the real world, instead of throwing them to the wolves. It’s really scary to someone like me, thinking you’re only one step away from having access to drugs again.”
“I think it’s a great idea. But don’t those places already exist?”
“Yeah, but there aren’t enough of them. Your transition from inpatient straight back to your regular life is some scary shit. For many people that’s fine. For me, not in a million years would that work. I would head right back to my favorite dealer and start buying again. The temptation is too alluring. I need a more controlled environment.”
“I see. I think you should go for it.”
We talk about his ideas and how it could work, what kind of facility he would need, the financing and before we know it, the pilot tells us we’re approaching Denver.
Our jet lands and two cars are waiting. One is for Kade to take him back to his place and the other is from DWI (Drexel Wolfe Investigations).
Kade and I hug and part ways.
A man named Troy Huffington introduces himself. “Call me Huff or I won’t know who you’re speaking to.”
“Good to know.”
We drive into downtown Denver and he pulls into an underground parking facility. The security is tight. Very tight. He first goes through a checkpoint. They ask for my ID. Then they hand me a temporary ID. After we pass through that, we have to drive through another electronic scanner that requires his handprint. There is a third that requires his handprint with a simultaneous scan of his ID. That finally allows us access to the parking area. We park and walk to the elevator. He stands in front of a camera and apparently it scans his face for recognition. Then the doors open.
“You must have Fort Knox up here.”
“We might,” he alludes.
It’s a smooth ride to the top. When we walk out, once again we face a ton of hoops to jump through before we can access the inner sanctum of DWI.
“Need a pit stop?”
“Why, do you need a DNA sample?”<
br />
He laughs. “No, just thought I’d swing you by.”
“Nah, I’m good.”
The receptionist greets Huff as we walk through. Eyes are on us. Women, mainly. He leads us directly to a sliding glass door and when we enter, I feel like I’m on a movie set. It has more technology than the security at HTS and that’s really something.
Drex Wolfe stands and greets me. “Kestrel. I wish I could say it’s good to see you.”
“Same.”
“Hi, Kestrel. I’m so sorry about your mother.”
I turn to see Gemini, Drex’s wife and business partner standing there. Together, not only do they make a formidable team but they also make quite a couple. She’s exotically gorgeous and he’s—well, let’s say everyone takes notice of Drex when he walks into a room. He not only owns it, he analyzes it, takes it apart, then reassembles it. Admittedly, I’m envious of the man.
“Thank you, Gemini. It’s been a rough few days.”
“I’m glad to know that your girlfriend and Gabby are going to be fine. And you, too.”
“Yeah, thanks. I’m good. Gabby was the worst. Carter is already out of the hospital. But I’m worried about her. I’m afraid her association with me is going to harm her again.”
“Well, that’s what you hired us for, right?”
Drex asks, “What kind of protection does she have?”
I fill him in and he calls out to Huff. “Hey Huff, get in here.”
Huff is there in seconds and Drex explains the situation. The three of them murmur amongst themselves and finally Drex says, “Get Dane down there. Today.” Drex turns to me and says, “I need everything you have on Carter. Work place, home, car, every single thing you can. Tell Gem. Friends’ names and so on. We’ll fill Dane in on the way so when he gets there, he’ll have her file. He’ll be dark and she won’t know he’s there.”
“Dark?”
“Undercover. I don’t want him to be out in the open. He’ll melt into the background. But he’s the best and he’ll keep her safe.”
“But her bodyguards—”
He interrupts, “Are okay, but not as good as Dane. Trust me.”
“Yeah. Okay.”
Kestrel Page 27
