by Anne Styles
The shock came as she took one of the little bridesmaids back to the marquee after taking her to the loo.
Standing looking around for Rosie's mother, she froze. There, talking and laughing with Cress, was Nick.
How could Cress do this to her? she thought in total panic. He wasn't coming; she had said so. There was no way out. Nick had seen her, standing, trembling, clutching the child's hand. 'There's Mummy,' Sarah whispered in relief. 'Go on, darling.' She gave Nick no help. She was unable to move, her legs turned to jelly, her eyes fixed to the floor as he made his way to her across the marquee. Reaching her, he said nothing, simply drew her into his arms and held her while her heartbeat steadied back to normal.
'You weren't coming,' she accused finally, her eyes at last meeting his. He looked thinner, and the stress lines were etched deeper round his eyes than ever.
'I changed my mind. I got in at four o'clock this afternoon,' he told her. 'Sarah, I wanted to see you again so badly, I took a chance you'd want to see me.'
'How can you be so unfair to me?' she demanded. 'How am I ever going to get myself together if you keep changing the rules?' Nick looked around, taking in the people watching them with frank curiosity. Cress's family obviously read the Unicorn, he thought wryly, and he quickly led Sarah onto the dance floor. Luckily the music was slow, and he could hold her. Sarah knew quite well she would fall down if he didn't.
'That's the one, isn't it?' James's mother hissed at him in complete awe - just wait till she could tell Dottie Burton all this - 'The one there was all the fuss about in the papers?'
'Yes, Mum,' James snapped, unusually for him. 'Just leave them alone, for God's sake! They won't thank you for barging in on them.'
'As if I would!' She was indignant. 'He's really handsome, I must say! That poor little thing. She looked so sad early on, now look at her!' James watched Sarah's face change as she danced from chalk-white panic to glowing joy. He wasn't at all surprised Nick wanted her back, and in that swirling white dress, bare-shouldered and tight-waisted, she looked enchanting that evening.
'I hope we've done the right thing persuading him to come?' he whispered to Cress.
'I don't know, but it's too late now. It's up to them,' Cress said as James led her onto the dance floor.
'One more dance, my darling, and we will have to leave them to it,' he told her. Dancing, they drew level with Nick and Sarah. Completely oblivious to everyone, they could have been alone on the floor. 'They'll be fine,' he assured his wife confidently, and soon guided her to the edge. 'I think it's about time we disappeared to start making a few babies, don't you?' he suggested. 'Come on, let's get changed. I can't cope with this collar much longer - it reminds me of work!' Giggling, they ran into the house and James helped her out of the froth of silk and lace. 'Beautiful as that is, I still prefer you without,' he laughed. 'But can we take your veil with us?'
'Now I find out you're kinky!'
'Too late!' he rejoined, pulling his sweater over his head. 'Let's go, sweetheart, I think our transport is here. I bet Ben won't be able to decorate this wedding car!' Cress watched in amazement as the helicopter dropped down on the lawn behind the marquee. 'Special present from Charlie,' explained James. 'Only the best for my wife - don't forget your bouquet. I think there's someone who really needs it to be thrown at them!' Nick and Sarah stood with their arms around each other, watching the newly married couple make their cheerful farewells until Cress whirled over to them, kissing them both. Sarah hugged her back.
'Thank you, Cress,' she said softly as James caught her hand.
'See you in Ireland, Sarah.' He waved to her, and Cress was laughing as they ran to the helicopter.
'Catch, Sarah!' she cried, and threw her bouquet high in the air to land in Sarah's arms.
Almost in tears, she held the bouquet in one hand as the machine rose above them, blowing her hair against Nick's face as she clutched her wreath of flowers with the other. They began to laugh as they disentangled themselves, and Sarah pulled a white rose from the bouquet to put in his buttonhole. 'I think we can safely leave now,' he said. 'I'm sure no one will mind.'
'I'll go and change,' she suggested, but Nick shook his head.
'Don't,' he said. 'You look so gorgeous in that and I think it'll fit in my car.' Sarah ran upstairs to get her day clothes, bundling them into her bag frantically, and went back to say her own farewells as quickly and gracefully as she could. She was especially charming to James's parents, introducing Nick to them with an almost transparent pride.
He folded her skirts around her in the passenger seat, then swung into the car himself. Only then did he have the chance to kiss her, and he took his time, his soft, warm lips exploring hers. Sarah leant back in the circle of his arms and opened her mouth to him, giving little sighs of pleasure as she did so. 'Lucky I booked into the same hotel,' he told her. 'Your room or mine?'
'What makes you think I'm going to leap straight back into bed with you, Nicholas Grey?' she asked him as he sped down the narrow lane towards the main road. 'I think you're taking a lot for granted.'
'Maybe, but from the way you kissed me just now, I get the impression that I could talk you into it,' he suggested, his eyes twinkling. 'I came a long way to be turned down.'
'How long are you here?'
'About a week - it depends. Then I go away for two. After that I'll be back for good. Jane and Chris have run NGA long enough, and we have new plans, thanks to you.' She was curious, but he was giving nothing away.
At the hotel, he collected their keys and ordered champagne to be sent up to Sarah's room. 'I need to catch up with you,' he said, and smiled.
'I've hardly had a chance to drink anything,' she confessed. 'I still seem to be a magnet for every child in the place!'
'I prefer that to their fathers!' Nick teased as he shrugged off his jacket and loosened his tie.
Sarah threw her bag on the floor and flopped onto the wide window seat. 'I'm whacked!' she sighed. 'Weddings are hard work!' She filled him in on the ceremony that he had missed, repeating the better jokes of the speeches, in which both James and Ben had been on top form - anything, she knew, to slow things down.
* * *
When the room service waiter came with the champagne, she escaped into the bathroom. Staring into the mirror at her shining eyes, she took off the now faded wreath and cleaned off her make-up. Running out of things to delay her, she cleaned her teeth before she went back to him. 'I thought you'd climbed out of the window,' he joked, handing her a glass.
'I probably could parachute down in this skirt,' she laughed back, but she was shaking.
Nick let her take a sip of the champagne, then he took the glass from her and drew her towards him by the wrists. 'Don't panic, Sarah.' His voice was husky with emotion. 'I just... I can't say it... I just want you back, darling. Oh, hell! Are you going to make me beg?'
'I thought you'd left me for good!' She was angry then. 'I've spent months trying to get over you, and just as I think I 'm getting somewhere you come back and throw me completely. I'm not sure I can take it again, Nick.'
'Is there someone else? Charlie or Bruce?' he demanded, suddenly afraid, but Sarah shook her head. He thought of the agonies of the last few months, of the fruitless rows he had had with Diana, the number of times he had wept bitter tears of frustration over his situation, learning just how much emotion he was capable of once the floodgates were open. 'Please, let's try, angel.' He was pleading with her, and Sarah stared at him in amazement. The arrogant, all-conquering Nicholas Grey was really begging her, and she knew she was going to give way. Even as he kissed her she knew. Turning, she lifted her hair so that he could unfasten the tiny buttons down the back of her dress.
'Cress and her bloody buttons!' he joked, struggling with them. He let the dress down and the froth of petticoats attached to it dropped with it. Sarah stepped out of it, kicking it away, standing very still in front of him in the lace pants and hold-up stockings which were all she wore under it, hea
ring his gasp of amazement as she released her hair. She and Cress had joked that afternoon as they had put on stockings, but she had assumed she would be taking hers off alone. Cress had obviously known differently.
Even so, she gave him no help, watching with a soft smile as he struggled with stubborn cufflinks, dragging off his shirt half-buttoned in his impatience. Only then did she take off the lace pants, letting him remove the stockings slowly, teasingly slowly, and shivering at his hands and lips on her legs as he did it.
'I've ached for you so often during the last few months,' he sighed when they were finally both naked, and he laid her on the bed, trailing his fingertips over her, making her tremble and then twist with desire as they quickly became bolder, moving to explore the soft gold tangle of curls at the apex of her thighs, persuading them to part easily, allowing his mouth to take over his devastating exploration.
They had all the time in the world and he took it, marvelling at her body as he remembered and rediscovered it. Her desire for him hadn't dimmed as she had begun to think it had. She measured her length against him, sliding her toes along his bare legs, making him cry out as she touched him, wielding all her old power over him again in seconds. Diana might have been around, she thought triumphantly, but Nick felt to her as if he hadn't seen a woman in months. She was driving him insane.
With a groan of need, he threw himself onto her, all gentleness gone in his desperate need to possess her, to spill himself inside her and make her his again.
'Has there really not been anyone else?' he asked, when they had made love for the second time, and Sarah lay in his arms gently running her fingers through the soft hair on his chest.
'No, really, no one.' She smiled. 'Almost once with Charlie, but nothing really happened.' 'Getting it up has always been Charlie's problem,' he commented disparagingly 'Not with Bruce, though? I'm surprised. He's not the type to leave you alone, I know.' '
Bruce is sweet, but he's just a friend, and very mixed up over his ex-wife. I just made him look good to everyone else while he was getting over her.'
'He's one of the most evil men I know!' Nick shuddered. 'He's into coke in a big way, surely you realize that?'
'Yes, but he never made me use it. I wouldn't anyway. You should know that!' Nick pulled her close.
'I nearly freaked when I saw a picture of him with you in Variety. You looked so ill.'
'You thought I was into drugs! Oh, gosh - I bet that's why Charles dragged me to see his doctor! He must've thought the same. For Christ's sake. Nick, I'm not like Natasha! How could you think that of me? I had a bad cold when that picture was taken. I hated it!'
'If Charles took you to see Richard he must have been worried,' Nick said: 'I take it everything was OK?'
'Yes, yes,' she assured him, 'and I've stopped smoking too.' He laughed. 'So how did you manage without me, if you didn't sleep with anyone else? Were you as frustrated as I was?'
'Oh, I managed.' She was evasive.
'How?' 'Oh, you know ... a little DIY.' She bit her lip in embarrassment. 'It saved a lot of hassle.' 'Show me?' He was intrigued, and very turned on, tired though he was. Sarah was reluctant, but he finally persuaded her, teasing and coaxing until she demonstrated, and then it made him so hard he had to make love to her again, before they settled down under the blankets.
It was only then that Nick began to talk, to tell her about the complications of his business and his life with Diana.
And at last, at long last, he talked about Natasha, and Sarah listened with growing horror as he revealed the story of his deep love for her and the torture she had put him through, both mentally and financially, as he had sought to cope with her growing dependency on heroin. By the time Natasha had left him for Charles he had used up every penny of his inheritance from his grandparents and he had been deeply in debt.
'I'd been getting more and more involved with Diana over the worst months and I married her very quickly after that,' he admitted. 'I was fond of her, but I realized quite soon after we got married that I'd made a mistake - too late, I'm afraid.'
'I wish you'd told me all this before,' she said gently. 'I would have understood you better, I'm sure.'
'Maybe I should have done,' he sighed. 'But I've always kept my feelings to myself. . . until you came along. I was so determined you weren't going to get to me. I was going to stay away from you and let you start again with someone else, but I just couldn't. When Cress said you were miserable too, I just took a chance and jumped on a plane. I want you back, Sarah, more than I can tell you ... if you'll have me?'
'What about Diana?' She sounded doubtful.
'It's going to be difficult, because she won't consider a divorce at the moment. She will, however, discuss money, so I started there. I may well have to wait the full amount of time for a divorce - unless we can find a settlement figure!' he admitted. 'I've spent hours with lawyers and accountants, and I've talked to Chris at some length about the business. He has a really good financial brain, and to my surprise he was very interested in joining me. He's raising new finance and joining us as a full partner, so in fact he can take over the day-to-day running of the business. With Charles, that makes three of us, and with the additional finance we can afford to buy out Diana and move to the only kind of premises I'd find acceptable. Chris knows of some in Covent Garden: At long last, darling, I'll be free of any interference. Diana will ask for a fortune as a settlement, but if I have to I'll sell some of the paintings. Luckily, the bulk of my money is made in the States, and out of the reach of her lawyers.'
'As long as you're not trying to con me?' Sarah was still uncertain.
'No, I'd never do that. I promise, Sarah. I just need a little more time to work it all out. By the time you come back from Ireland we'll be in the new offices, and I can concentrate on what to do next. Without the day-to-day management of the company, when Chris takes over, we can spend a great deal of time in America rather than here. My name will still be on the letter-heading to satisfy the clients, so the jobs will be safe. It'll be good for me and a great opportunity for you, living in Hollywood. Seth has plans for a musical next year, and we can both do it - though I admit the only fly in the ointment is that getting Seth to agree to the musical meant I have to do some pig of a job for him in Brazil first!' .
'You really have thought about it, haven't you?' Nick reached over and refilled the glasses they had discarded earlier.
'I've thought about nothing else. I knew there had to be a solution if I looked hard enough, but I really did feel I should do the right thing for once. Diana wanted me to stay so badly and I felt such a heel over the way I'd behaved. Having an affair behind my wife's back never really bothered me much before - probably because the woman involved didn't mean much I suppose. But you did ... do ... and I got to feel really awful, frankly, about both of you. Thankfully, your ultimatum was the spur I needed. I did what Diana wanted for a while, just to show willing, but it really was hopeless. All I could think of was you! Now I know I can't work it out with her, and I feel I can put the past behind me with a clear conscience. That's if you'll have me back, after all I've done to you.
'I prayed so hard that I wasn't going to be too late. I dreaded Charles talking you into marriage before I could get it all together. Believe me, darling, I'm really not the bastard everyone thinks I am; you have definitely found my weak spot!' he admitted, handing her a glass. 'To us, Sarah. I just hope you know what a tired old man you're taking on!'
CHAPTER 20
They had just over a week while Nick was in England. He moved into Sarah's flat with her, after collecting some clothes from Regent's Park, and swore all the staff at NGA to secrecy as he and Chris worked to organize the complicated move. Sarah was busy with the shopping trips for the Irish film and her shooting lessons, but she spent every precious minute she could with him before he went back to Los Angeles. Flying off to Dublin almost as soon as Nick got back from LA was almost more than she could bear. To be back together for two nights onl
y to part again nearly finished her, and she boarded the Aer Lingus jet with a heavy heart, but wearing a ring of delicately plaited gold interspersed with diamonds on the third finger of her left hand.
'The nearest we can get for a while,' he'd told her as he put it onto her finger during their last evening together.
'The minute we can make it official I shall buy you the biggest diamond I can find!'
'I don't want that,' Sarah had protested. 'This means far more to me, and it's gorgeous!' She looked at the beautiful ring a great deal during the flight, twisting it continually, it was becoming a nervous habit already. Perhaps it was her substitute for holding a cigarette, she thought, amused, still wondering how serious Nick was about leaving Diana. It appalled her how much money he would need to divorce her.
Nick was the first question on James's lips when she saw him in the foyer of the Shelboume when she arrived.
With a shriek of delight she flew at him as he stood talking to Alex, and hugged them both. 'I didn't know you were on this, Alex,' she cried, kissing him.
'I'm the only English member of the crew!' he replied. 'Apart from you two, everyone else is Irish or American.'
'Back for some more creme de menthe?' Sarah teased. Alex shuddered.
'I still owe our bridegroom for that!' he threatened. 1'll get him sooner or later!'
'How's Cress?' Sarah asked, then admired James's tan. 'That's nearly as good as mine! Does it go all the way round, or is it just on your back?'
'All the way!' he grinned. 'And I haven't got a white bum either!'
'Shame we haven't got a full nude scene, then!' Alex grinned. 'Maybe I'll persuade our director we need one! Dinner with him at eight?'
James walked Sarah up to her room, anxious to know about Nick, since he knew she wouldn't talk about him in front of Alex. 'We felt a little guilty,' he admitted, 'dumping you two together like that.'
