Five
Lindsey
“No! Vivi!” I was at her side in seconds, kneeling on the floor, tears streaming down my face. It was stupid, but I couldn’t help it. I’d had Vivian since I was eight. Named her for my grandma, who’d bought her for me. I should have put the doll away long ago, so she wouldn’t get dusty. Or hurt by flying bears.
I untangled her hair from the plastic stand, which took a while because I couldn’t see through my watery eyes. Once she was loose, I carried her to my bed and lay down. I smoothed her bright red hair, the same color mine used to be before it got darker. “I’m sorry,” I whispered. “What would Granny say if she knew how I’d treated you?”
Vivi just lay there with her eyes closed as though she were saying, Get with the program! Take a nap. Funny that in my head she always sounded like my grandmother. What I wouldn’t give for Granny to be here right now. But she’d died when I was twelve, so I’d have to make do without her.
That thought gouged another hole in my heart. My tears, which had slowed down, started back up again. Fantabulous. I was a total mess. I needed help. It was time to take my mother’s suggestion—something I almost never did—and call the girls.
I retrieved my phone from my jacket pocket and shed my boots before getting back in bed. I couldn’t actually call because I knew they wouldn’t be able to understand me through all this blubbering. I scrolled through my messages until I found our most recent group text.
Lindsey: I need you guys. Can you spend the night?
Rose: What happened?
Claire: Is it Adam?
Lindsey: Just see if you can come.
Several minutes passed, and I snuggled with Vivi while I waited. Then finally my cell let out a ding.
Claire: Be there in an hour.
I wiped my eyes with a corner of the bedspread. Everything was going to be okay. Claire was coming. She’d know what to do. She always knew what to do. My cell dinged again.
Rose: Me too.
Thank goodness. They were both going to help. I didn’t have to figure this out all alone.
***
I came awake slowly, like swimming up from the bottom of a pool. An insistent tune played on handbells kept repeating. Must be someone’s phone. I sat up and squinted at the bright screen of my cell lighting up my dark bedroom. That wasn’t my ringtone. But it was definitely my phone. Oh, right. My brother, Austin, had been messing with it this morning before he left to go home.
I snatched it up. “Hello,” I croaked, without looking to see who was calling.
“We’re here,” a female voice said through chattering teeth. “Let us in. We’re freezing.”
Crap. How long had they been waiting? “Coming.” I hung up and headed for the stairs. Amazingly, I made it to the front door without killing myself. I whipped it open. Claire and Rose practically tumbled inside. “I’m so, so sorry,” I said. “I fell asleep.”
“It’s okay,” Rose said. “I’m warmer already.”
Claire’s arms were full of pizza boxes. “Don’t be offended if I leave my coat on for a while.”
I led the way into the kitchen. “I’m sorry. I had no idea I’d fall asleep.”
“Turn on the oven,” Claire said. “I want to warm these up.”
“All of them?” I asked. “Why’d you buy us four pizzas?”
Rose went to the oven and started pushing buttons.
“Because we might get hungry again,” Claire said. “You know, like when you want us to stay awake at three a.m.?”
I leaned against the counter, my pulse slowing after my run down the stairs. “Thanks so much for doing this, you guys. I really needed—” My voice squeaked, and I broke off.
They both looked at me. Rose came closer, her light brown eyes concerned. “Your eye makeup is a disaster. Go wash your face. We’ll get dinner set up.”
I pressed my fingertips to my cheekbone. “Okay. Be right back.”
I was up the stairs and in the bathroom in ten seconds flat. Ugh. Rose was right. My puffy eyes were smeared with black mascara that made streaks down my cheeks and toward my ears. I scrubbed my face clean, first with hot water, then with cold, as though I could scrub the pain away. It didn’t work, of course. I patted my face dry and hurried away from my pink-skinned reflection in the mirror. Claire and Rose were here. That already made things better.
Back in kitchen, the girls had put a salad and drinks on the table. “Wow, that was fast,” I said.
“We came prepared,” Claire said, holding two bottles of salad dressing. “Where are your parents, anyway?”
I dropped into a chair. “At some fundraiser.”
“Yay! We can watch our movies super loud,” Claire said in a fake cheery voice.
I wanted to tell her not to try so hard, but I wasn’t ready to start talking yet.
Rose brought over a plain cheese pizza to the table. “We got your favorite.”
“Thanks,” I said. Could I even eat anything? My stomach felt like it was full of knotted rope. The girls sat down, watching me like I might break. I shook my head. “Don’t look at me like that. This isn’t a funeral.”
“Isn’t it?” Rose asked in her softest voice.
I opened my mouth, but nothing came out. In a way, it was a funeral. For the death of a relationship. “Yeah,” I finally said.
“Eat at least three bites of food,” Claire said. “Then you can tell us what idiotic thing Adam did.”
I snorted. Rose laughed, which made me laugh. She has one of those infectious laughs that cause people to chuckle, even when they don’t get the joke. Suddenly the pizza didn’t look so bad. I ate the required three bites, then took a sip of Coke. “Y’all ready?”
“Yup,” Rose said.
“Fire away,” Claire said.
I told the story of my trip to the airport as quickly as I could. When I was done, I exhaled heavily and tried to relax my hands, which had curled into fists while I talked.
Claire’s eyes had grown hard. “What a freaking, stupid—”
“Claire,” Rose said.
“Well, he is,” Claire said. She tossed down her napkin and went to get the bottle of soda. “He’s always been out for what he could get.”
Irritation rose inside of me. She’d always believed that, and maybe she was right, but I had a sudden urge to defend him. Which I shoved so far down that it probably reached my toes. “Not helping.”
She huffed. “Sorry. I just hate the way he’s treated you. Especially when you’ve been so completely in love with him.”
Rose glared at her. “Seriously, Claire.”
Something twisted near my heart, and a weird sobbing noise escaped my body. “It’s true. I do love him.” I wiped viciously at the tears now streaming down my face.
Rose stood and pulled me up into a hug. “It’s gonna be okay. It’s just gonna take a while.”
“How long?” I asked, my voice wavering.
Claire’s voice came from across the kitchen. “Bring her over here.”
“Why?” Rose asked.
“She can stick her face in the freezer. My mom always does that when she has a hot flash.”
Frowning, I pulled back from Rose, and we looked at each other. Then at Claire, holding open the freezer door. We started laughing, mine coming through hiccups. “Whatever,” I said. “I’ll try anything.”
So there I was, standing with my head in the freezer, the cold air billowing over my face, Rose still snickering behind me. And the weird thing was that after about ten seconds, I started to feel better. Maybe it froze the tear ducts or something. I sighed and backed out. “Okay, I’m done.”
Claire shut the freezer and slid her arm around my waist. “I’m sorry for yelling about Adam.”
“It’s okay. I just need to … Let’s sit back down.”
In our chairs again, I took another swallow of my drink, the carbonation making me burp. Rose smiled. I cleared my throat. I could say this. I had to say this. “Since I’ve never been
dumped before, I have a question.”
Claire raised an eyebrow. “You remember Rose and I have no experience with breakups? Don’t expect great advice.”
I waved a hand. “Just listen. How long do you think it’s going to take to get over this? I mean, it’d be good if I can be over it before school starts again.”
“In less than two weeks?” Rose asked, her voice rising as she spoke.
“That’s more time than I needed for my other boyfriends.”
Claire and Rose looked at each other, then back at me.
“I’m being stupid, aren’t I?” I asked.
They nodded. “You weren’t in love with any of those guys,” Claire said.
“And,” Rose said, “you broke up with them. You’ve never been a dumpee.”
“Thanks for reminding me,” I said to her.
“Sorry,” she said.
“It’s just that … ” My face heated from what I was about to say. “This is gonna be big news. People will talk. And I do not want to be that girl. The one who walks around looking devastated all the time. I won’t give Adam the satisfaction.”
Claire stretched her arm out and took my hand. “Linds, you can’t force yourself to be okay when you’re not. Let people talk. Who cares?”
“I do. You know I have a public image to maintain.”
Rose and Claire exchanged another one of their looks, then burst out laughing.
“What?” I asked. “It’s true.”
But they were too busy giggling to speak.
“Oh, shut up,” I said, and because I had to wait until they controlled themselves, I took a bite of my now cooled-off pizza.
“Sorry,” Rose said, like she was trying to shut off the giggles. Then she looked at Claire, whose face was turning red, and gave in to a full belly laugh. Which of course made it really hard to keep a straight face, so I concentrated on chewing.
Once I swallowed I said, “Guys, it’s just not that funny.”
Claire inhaled a noisy breath. “You just sounded so … ”
“Pompous,” Rose supplied.
“Snooty,” Claire said.
“Okay, okay,” I said. “I get it. But here’s the thing. People expect me to be perfect, to have it all together. And I’m not going to disappoint them.”
Rose cocked her head like she was about to look at Claire, but then stopped herself. “C’mon, you need to trust people more. It’s okay to let them see you’re hurting.”
“At school? Are you nuts?” I grabbed my plate and took it to the sink. “That would be social suicide.”
“I’m not saying you should cry on everybody’s shoulder,” Rose said. “But you can let a few people know what’s going on.”
Why didn’t she get it? I motioned to the two of them. “I am. Y’all know. And you’re the only ones who need to.”
Claire brought her plate to the sink, too, and then just stood there staring at me. As if she were waiting for me to figure out some big life lesson.
“Look,” I said, “I may not feel okay for a really long time. But I’m an actress, and a damn good one, and I can make other people think that I’m okay with this whole breakup.”
Claire took the plate from my shaking hands. “If that’s what you want to do.”
Six
Berger
Two weeks later, I led the way into my new bedroom/game room. “Voila!”
Gray stopped and looked around. “Whoa.”
“I know.”
He squeezed past my chest of drawers, which I’d set up near one end of the pool table. “We’re not gonna be able to play pool very well.”
“When do we ever play pool?”
He rubbed one side of his jaw. “About twice a year, I think.”
“Heh. Well, if we decide to play, we’ll move stuff around.”
“Why didn’t y’all just put the table in the garage or something?”
“There’s too much of Nana’s stuff in there now.”
“Wow.” He edged around to where my twin bed was set up against the wall, partially under the pool table. “You’d better not thrash around in your sleep—you could break a leg or something.”
“Very funny.” I headed to my desk to turn off my computer.
“Wait,” Gray said, making his way over. “What’s that? School doesn’t start until tomorrow. You’re not already doing homework?”
“It’s the one-act play for theater. I was just reading the synopsis. Auditions are tomorrow.” I put the computer to sleep and dropped onto the couch.
Gray turned on the Xbox One and sat. “You auditioning?”
“Yeah, unless I chicken out. I mean, what’s the point of taking the stupid class if I never try out for a play?”
Gray gave me a weird look. “You know what that means, don’t you?”
“What?”
“You’ll probably be acting alongside Lindsey.”
Yeah, the thought had crossed my mind, but whatever. I couldn’t exactly avoid her in theater. “I probably won’t get a part. It’s a small cast—three guys, three girls.” And even as I said that, I realized I really wanted a part. Wanted to be in that play. Just to see if I could do it.
“Hmm. But what if you do? I mean, she’s not your favorite person.”
I frowned. “We’ll deal. It’s not like we’re little kids who are gonna go all WWE on each other.”
Gray laughed. “That I’d like to see.”
I tried to keep a straight face. “Picture it. She’d get me in a headlock and then do a throwdown, but I’d jump up and kick her in the gut, sending her flying into the ropes.”
Gray scrolled through his character options on the screen. “Careful. You sound like you’d enjoy that way too much.”
“Who wouldn’t?”
“You heard she and Castro are done, right?”
“So?” I checked my character’s stats.
“Well, she’s gotta be hurting. Drama club may be weirder than normal for a while.”
“What’re you talking about? She seemed perfectly fine when everybody was at your house on New Year’s.”
We started the game. Gray leaned forward over his controller. “Claire says she hides things.”
“What things? The soap? Her hair dryer?”
“Her feelings, you nut job.”
I shot at Gray but missed. Crap. “She can hide those all she wants. Not my problem.”
“You might want to watch out for her. Since you’re gonna be around her more than the rest of us. Just saying.”
I turned away from the game and stared at Gray. “What exactly are you asking me to do?”
He shot me and laughed as I died.
“Jerk,” I said.
Gray snickered. “Just, you know, maybe run interference if it looks like she needs help or something. You like to take care of people anyway, why not her?”
“Right. That’s gonna happen.”
Nana appeared in the open doorway, a scared look on her face. I paused the game. “You boys need to stop this fighting,” she said, her voice shaky. “Come into the kitchen, and we’ll make cookies together.”
I glanced at Gray. He had his eyebrows raised. “Um, Nana,” I said, “we’re just playing a game.”
“Right now, Trey,” she said. “I know how you two love making cookies.” She made shooing motions with her hands. “Let’s go.”
I stood as she bustled away. “Sorry, man, we have to go with her. At least for a couple of minutes.”
“It’s cool. I’ve already killed you today.” Gray followed me out of the room. “You think we can really make cookies with her? Like when we were little?”
I laughed. “No. I just need to keep her happy.”
“Got it.”
***
The next morning, I was chugging my glass of chocolate milk when Ashley walked into the kitchen.
“You ready?” she asked.
“Just need to brush my teeth.” I set my glass in the sink and then rubbed my still-achin
g shin. I’d bashed it against the pool table when I was getting up that morning.
“Is Maggie already here?” Ashley asked.
“I thought I heard her talking to Mom earlier.”
She bit her lower lip. “Okay.”
“What?”
“I’m just worried. It’s the first day we’re all gonna be gone since Nana moved in.”
“It’ll be fine. Maggie has taken care of Nana before. She knows the drill.”
Ashley opened the refrigerator and stared. “I guess.”
We really didn’t have time for this. We needed to leave for school. Well, I needed to go to school. Ashley’s classes didn’t start for another week, so she was helping our parents at the coffee shop until then. “I’ll be right back.”
She made some comment or grunt. I couldn’t tell which because I was already halfway across the living room by then, working to ignore the throb in my shin. It wasn’t going to be all fun and games with Nana living here.
I brushed my teeth quickly, grabbed my backpack from my room, and slung it over my shoulder. Ash stood in the living room, eating an apple, her purse dangling from her shoulder.
“I’m just gonna say goodbye to Nana,” I said.
“Don’t,” Ashley said.
“Why not? It’ll just take a sec.”
She swallowed. “Everything’s calm right now.”
Man, she worried a lot. “I’m not leaving without saying goodbye. I’ll meet you in the car.”
“Trey,” she said as I walked past her.
“What?”
She gave her head a quick shake. “Never mind. Meet you outside.”
I headed for the hall. Voices from a morning TV news program sounded from my old bedroom. I peeked around the corner. Nana sat in her recliner, watching the show. Maggie, her head bent, folded clothes beside Nana’s bed.
“Hey, Nana,” I said, walking slowly toward her. If Ashley was so worried about Nana being calm, the least I could do was not rush in and rush out. Even though I might want to. I leaned over and kissed her velvety cheek.
Life in the Lucky Zone (The Zone #2) Page 3
