“Buddy, I don't think this is any of your business, so-” Finally, he looks, stopping mid-sentence when he sees that it's a cop. 43 takes a small step away from me.
Gabe looks at me. “Ma'am?” He questions, and I've never been so thankful to hear him say that.
“Um, everything is fine.” I turn to 43, who looks a little pissed. “Catch you later.” I quickly turn around, pull the house key from my bra, and go inside without another look back.
With my back against the door, I can hear feet shuffling away, but then some coming towards me. A knock sounds loudly, making me jump. I slowly open the door to peek, and once I see it's Gabe, I open it completely.
“Are you okay?” He asks.
“Yeah. What are you doing here?”
Gabe doesn't come in when I move aside. He stays just outside of my doorframe. “You apparently left your phone in your friend's car and left a party without telling her. She called me from your cell, worried, and said that wasn't like you at all. She thought you might be in some sort of trouble. I was patrolling nearby, so I told her I would stop by to see if you were here.”
Suddenly, I wonder how long he was watching. Did he hear what we said about me being easy? Which he probably knew anyway thanks to our date, but it has to be a different story when he hears that I'm that way from a complete stranger. I want to ask him if he heard, but then decide I don't really want to know.
“Oh, well, I'll call her on my house phone and let her know I'm fine. Sorry to have bothered you while you're working.”
He frowns. “It looked like I needed to be bothered. Are you sure you're fine? I don't need to go hunt him down?”
I laugh at his concern. “Yes, I'm sure. Thank you, though.”
There's a lull, and it's like he just realized what I am wearing because his eyes slowly rake over my body. That action alone has me all hot and bothered. Gabe clears his throat with a slight shake of his head.
“I have to get back to work. Call your friend, because she was really worried.”
“I will.”
“Okay, see you later, Ryan.”
“Later.” I watch him turn and walk away before I close my door.
Without wasting any time, I call Viv. She's already on her way here with my phone and to check on me herself since she hadn't heard back yet. When she does get here, I convince her that I just wasn't feeling well after explaining what happened. She leaves my phone and then goes on home, thankfully. Seeing Gabe completely threw me off, especially since he easily turned me on. I am dying to have sex now. I wonder if he would come over when he gets off.
But then I remember how he looked last night before he left. Inviting him over would be a bad idea. So I plop onto the couch, slip off my shoes, prop my feet onto the coffee table, and turn on Netflix to find a horror movie. I pick the first one it recommends, not really caring what I watch as long as it's horror. My phone buzzes next to me.
Gabe: I know it's late & rude to invite myself, but do you care if I come over after my shift?
He wants to come over? It's almost one in the morning. Maybe I misread his expression. After a quick debate, I text him back.
Only if you bring popcorn.
It's a little after half past one when there's a knock on my door. I pause the movie and go to the door to find a freshly showered Gabe wearing a t-shirt and jeans. He must have gone home first.
Gabe holds out the box of popcorn. “Here you go.”
I giggle because part of me thought he wouldn't actually do it. “Thanks. Come on in.”
He shuts the door and follows me into my kitchen where I put a bag of popcorn in the microwave. When I turn to face Gabe, I catch him admiring my legs. Guys go crazy over them because they are tan, toned, and long. They are easily my best asset. He smiles, looking a little embarrassed that I caught him. I hoist myself onto my counter to sit, leaning forward just a tad as my hands anchor myself on either side of me. We watch each other for a moment before Gabe walks over to lean against the counter next to me.
“You're probably wondering why I wanted to come over?” He says as he folds those big arms over his chest and crosses his ankles, looking completely relaxed in my kitchen.
“I figured you just really wanted to bring me popcorn.”
Gabe laughs. “That's exactly why. Now that I'm here though, I feel underdressed.”
I giggle softly, looking down at my top and sparkly skirt. “I haven't gotten around to changing yet.” The popcorn begins to pop as I hop down from the counter. “Make sure it doesn't burn. I'm going to change and then you're watching a horror movie with me.”
“You like scary movies?” He seems surprised.
“Hell yeah. I live for the thrill, remember?” I laugh and then leave him to popcorn duty.
When I get to my room, I'm not sure what to change into. It's late, and I want to be comfy, but not in pajamas. After quickly examining my closet, I decide the hell with it. I'm going to wear whatever the fuck I want. I pick a cute, dark gray pair of sweatpants that still manage to make my ass look good and a pink tank top. Upon my return to the living room, Gabe is sitting on the couch with the popcorn, the smell quickly overtaking my apartment. There are also two bottles of Sunkist on the coffee table. I faintly smile at how he thought that far ahead.
“What are you watching?” He asks when I sit down next to him, plucking the bag from his hands.
“I don't know. Netflix picked for me. It's halfway over. Want to pick a new one?”
Gabe shrugs. “Up to you.”
I grab the remote and go to the second suggested movie and hit play. Out of the corner of my eye, I keep watch on when Gabe is out of popcorn. I'll tilt the bag his way so he can get more. The movie is terrible. Once I hit the forty-five minute mark and I'm still not interested, I bump Gabe's shoulder.
“Are you enjoying this?”
He shakes his head no. I get the remote and turn off the TV. Getting really comfortable, I turn a little to lay my legs over Gabe's.
“Why did you want to come see me so late at night?” I finally ask. He never offered to further tell me, but now I'm more curious.
Gabe puts his hands on my legs. One on my thigh and the other on my knee. He squeezes them a little before looking at me. “The truth?”
“Of course.”
“I wanted to see you, especially after earlier with that guy.” His brows come together with displeasure.
“You wanted to triple-check to make sure I was okay?” The thought is endearing. Gabe must have been worried about what happened.
He laughs at my question. “Yeah, pretty much.”
“Well, that was my first incident like that. Your timing couldn't have been more perfect. Thank you. Although, I'm sure I would have been fine without you.”
“You weren't scared at all?” he asks curiously. I shake my head in a lie. “What scares you then?”
Gabe's brown eyes watch me carefully as I think of an answer. I know what scares me, but that doesn't mean I want to share that with him. “What scares you, Gabe?” I ask instead. “I mean, you're a big, bad cop. There can't be a lot that scares you, right?”
He grins, knowing that I avoided his question, but he answers anyway. “Remember when I told you that going into law enforcement just fit?” I nod. “That's because it really does. I have always been on my best behavior. Part of that is because of my family being full of police officers, but mostly because I want to be able to look back on my life and know that I've been the best person I could be. I'm a good guy in almost every sense, and I want to help people as much as I can. I'm scared that I'll do something that will make me not-so-good, by my standards.”
And sleeping with me on the first date fucked that up for him. It all makes sense now. For the first time ever, I feel guilty about sleeping with guys so quickly. He shouldn't have come over. I'm his mistake. Something that shouldn't have happened. It's time for Gabe to go because I'm not going to hinder the image he has of himself any more than I already have. I
slowly remove my legs from under his hands and off his legs.
“That's, um, interesting.” I have to say something, and I'm not about to let him know that I know I'm on his list of shouldn't haves. “It's late, Gabe. Probably time to go home.”
Gabe looks a little confused, but then the light bulb goes off over his head. “Ryan, I didn't-”
“I don't know what you're talking about,” I interrupt, stupidly outing that I do indeed know what he was going to say. “It's late, and I have a lot to do tomorrow. That's all I meant. Nothing more.”
He reaches for my hands and holds it in his, running his thumb over my knuckles. “Tomorrow is a Sunday. What do you have to do?”
For some reason, his question makes me laugh. “Do you think I'm lying? I am many things, Gabe, but a liar isn't one of them.”
Gabe focuses his brown eyes on me. “Then you would have no problem going on another date with me?”
He's challenging me. That's what his response is. A challenge. I narrow my eyes at him and remove my hand from his.
“Now, you're just hurting my feelings, Ryan,” he jokes.
“No.” I want to ask him why. Why does he want to go out with me again when he clearly felt so terrible about the first one? It doesn't even make sense!
“No?”
“No. I don't want another date.” And to drive it home, I add, “I probably should have mentioned that I have a one date only track record that I'd like to keep.” It's a dumb thing to say, but I want him gone, and I'm hoping that will help.
“One date only?” He questions.
Is he just going to repeat parts of what I said? “Yep. I have a long list of first dates and zero for second dates.”
“And you want to keep that?” He says skeptically.
“Precisely.”
Gabe seems to think about this for a moment. “Fine. Then you would have no problem hanging out with me again?”
“Why the hell would I do that?” It's out of my mouth before I can help myself. “I mean, no thanks. I wouldn't want to tarnish that shiny armor of yours.” I smile sweetly. Then I get up and go to my door, opening it so there's no doubt of what I want.
Gabe runs his hands down his thighs and then stands. Finally! He walks over, coming to a stop in front of me. His head tilts as he looks at me like I'm a puzzle he can't solve. I think he's about to walk on out, but instead, he steps forward, cups my cheeks with his hands, and kisses me. Without meaning to, I relax into him as he gently parts my lips with his tongue. God, he's a fantastic kisser. Our mouths move slowly, like not a thing in the world exists more than savoring this moment.
And boy, is it worth savoring. For what seems like a lifetime, I'm lost in him with no hopes of ever being found again. But then Gabe pulls away after a final kiss. I can't find it in myself to open my eyes yet. My lips are buzzing from the lovin' they just got, as is the skin surrounding my mouth thanks to his facial hair, and my body is still paralyzed in place by his hands.
Gabe's breath fans out over my mouth as he softly says, “You look beautiful right now.”
My eyes pop open immediately. The corners of his mouth lift in a smile. In a whisper, I become completely honest with him. “No one has ever said something like that to me.”
“What? How you look after a kiss?”
I shake my head. “No. Well, yeah, that too, but I meant the beautiful part.”
Gabe's smile falls. Oh, fuck. I shouldn't have said that. Stupid, stupid, stupid girl! He's probably going to think I'm weak or something because no one calls me beautiful. That is so not the case, and I need to make sure he understands that. Before I can recover, he kisses me softly just once.
“Well, they should because you are,” he mumbles against my lips. He strong gaze bores into me. “Absolutely beautiful.”
My muscles are tense, waiting for him to laugh and add that he was joking. I've never been told that I'm beautiful. Hot or sexy, sure. Beautiful? No. My grandmother used to tell me that I was, but that was a long time ago. She was old and probably thought all little girls were beautiful. That hardly counts. Gabe holds my eyes, letting me absorb what he said. For the first time in my life, I ask him to do something that doesn't include sex. The funny thing about it is that my question embarrasses me more than if I had of outright asked him to sleep with me.
“Would you like to spend the night?” I ask quietly. “No sex, though.”
Gabe grins. I was really expecting a frown or a confused look, but I'll take a grin. “Only if I get a second date.”
I laugh, finally able to release some of my tension. “Okay, sure.”
He drops his hands from my cheeks and removes my hand from the doorknob before closing and locking the door. Like the confident, sure-of-herself girl that I am, I take his hand and lead him to my bathroom first.
“There's an extra toothbrush and anything else you might need in the medicine cabinet. I'm going to go put my pajamas on.”
While he's in there, I pick up the few clothes that were lying on the floor and toss them into my closet before changing into a cute pair of blue pajama shorts and taking off my bra. My tank top can stay on. Now that Gabe isn't right here with me, I'm a little tired, stifling a yawn when I hear the bathroom door open. Seconds later, Gabe appears at my bedroom door, still dressed.
“Just a second,” I tell him, lifting a finger. I turn to my dresser, open a drawer, and start looking for what I know is in there. When I find them, I hold them up. “I have mens' basketball shorts and a shirt if you want to wear them. They drown on me, so they would probably fit you.”
He raises an eyebrow at me. “You keep mens' clothing on hand?”
“They're mine. I bought them.” His brows both rise higher. Why is he making me flustered? This is ridiculous. “Look, when I get sick, I wear these because they are the ultimate comfortable clothes. Do you want to wear the damn things or not?”
Gabe chuckles. “Sure.”
I slam them into his chest as I walk past him to go to the bathroom myself, and I hear him chuckle again. Once I've washed my face, brushed my hair and teeth, and used the restroom, I go back to my room. I find him with his ass in the air because he's bending over to put his folded clothes on top of his shoes near my dresser. But when he turns around, I see that he's not wearing the shirt. Only the shorts.
Oh, he looks so hot. I would have never thought I would be a fan of chest hair, but it looks like heaven on him. Not to mention his happy trail and then those deep, V muscles. Fuck. It's going to be me who is resisting having sex. Not him! This is not fair.
“The shirt was too small,” he explains.
Thank God. He doesn't need to cover up that body or those muscled legs. Before I have to wipe away drool, I manage a nod. “I'm so not sorry about that.”
Gabe laughs. “Turn off the light and get in bed.”
That's all I needed to hear.
Chapter Five
Gabe
I don't even know where to start with this girl. First, her friend calls, freaking out that something bad had happened to her. When I get to her apartment, that jackass had her pinned against the door, wanting to go inside. I overheard what he said about her being easy and her response. Yet I still texted her later about coming over. Ryan obviously noticed how I looked when I left the other day because she interpreted what I said about being scared into that. That wasn't how I meant it. And then she kept turning me down with outrageous excuses. When she got up and opened the door, I had every intention on leaving.
That was what she wanted after all. I, on the other hand, wanted to kiss her. So I did. Ryan looked beautiful afterwards, just like I said. Her eyelashes fanned over her cheeks, and she was as lost as I felt. I can't believe no one has ever said that to her. What do they tell her then? Anyway, she asked me to stay, and I wasn't about to turn her down.
Now, we're lying on our sides in her bed. Ryan had nothing but pure lust in her eyes when she came back from the bathroom, and it's still lingering there.
&nbs
p; “You never told me what scares you,” I say, knowing it's a risk to bring that up again.
She sighs. With a blink, her desire disappears. “Thanks for effectively making me not want to sleep with you anymore.” She pauses. “Well, right now anyway.”
I chuckle, but wait for her to answer me.
“If I tell you, do you promise not to bring it up ever again?”
“Sure.” I'm expecting her to tell me something that isn't that big of a deal.
Ryan rolls to lay on her back and quietly speaks. “All my life, I've been trying to make up for not being what they wanted. I'm scared that it's a hopeless aspiration.”
“Who?” I ask gently.
“My parents. I wasn't lying when I said I've been a disappointment since birth. Their expectations are entirely too high, and I can't ever meet any of them. That's all I'm willing to say. What are we going to do on our second date?” She turns her head to look at me.
I smile, even though my mind is floored with what she said. “We're having a private shooting lesson.”
Ryan grins. “I'm kind of excited about that. A little scared, but a little excited too.” She covers her mouth with her hand to yawn. Then she rolls over, gives me a quick kiss, and adds, “I'm getting sleepy. G'night, Gabe.”
“Night, Ryan.”
I close my eyes with her, but my mind is still thinking. Her parents are obviously a touchy subject, and I want to know more. Unfortunately, I promised never to bring it up again. Maybe Ryan will want to share that with me eventually.
In the meantime, I need to keep myself from swooping in like Prince Charming himself. That doesn't work. With every relationship and me doing just that, I've lost the girl. There's only so much I can spare to lose after having lost so many times. My gut tells me that if things ever get serious with Ryan, I won't just lose. I would be utterly defeated and completely depleted of love to give. There should be a guard around my heart, so I can most definitely stop being that guy who is too good, too eager to trust.
You Before Me Page 5
