Confusion flits across her face for a moment before it's replaced with relief. “You do?” The corners of her mouth tilts up slightly.
“Absolutely.” I squeeze her hand. “I love you, Ryan.” My words are soft, but the love in my voice is unmistakable. She leans forward to kiss me, accidentally leaning on my shoulder. “Ow,” I flinch in pain.
“Shit! Sorry!” Ryan moves to the other side of the bed, carefully hovering above me and kisses me. “I love you too. I'm so happy you're okay, Gabe.”
“It's nothing serious. I'm fine. I'm more happy to see you.”
“You were shot,” she frowns at my dismissive tone towards what happen.
“Trust me, I know. I'm even thankful I was.”
“What the hell are you talking about, Gabe?” Ryan is thoroughly confused now.
“Well, I wouldn't choose for it to happen, but it did. My mom,” I emphasize so she'll understand my point, “went to tell you what happened when she found out we weren't talking.” I lace my fingers with hers. “You're here. I've missed you so much.”
“I missed you too.” She smiles.
“I've been worried about you.”
Ryan frowns. “Worried? Why were you worried?”
“I didn't know how things were with you and with your parents.”
“Oh. Well, I told them how badly I wanted to major in art and why I picked it. They told me they would support my decision under a few conditions. Other than that, we haven't really talked much. I think blowing up like I did really caught their attention. There's still a long way to go before things are better.” She sounds hopeful, and that makes me hopeful for her.
“It's a start, right?” She nods. “C'mere.” I keep saying, “Closer,” until she's close enough for me to kiss her. Ryan's grinning when I press my lips to hers. I kiss her slowly, but fiercely until I hear that happy sigh of hers. “Are you going to take care of me when I go home?” I mumble against her lips.
She laughs. “Yes, I will.”
“Thank you.”
Her green eyes pierce me. “You've taught me so much more than football or shooting, Gabe. Thank you for that.”
I smile because she's taught me so much too. Not only that, but I've finally met the person I can love with everything I am and who will love me just the same. Just as Ryan is about to give me another kiss, the door creeks open to reveal my mother, causing Ryan to stand upright again.
“Is everything okay in here?” She asks.
“Yeah, Mom. We're good.” I squeeze Ryan's hand, and she smiles down at me.
“Great. Your father and brother are here if you want to see them.” She glances between us, almost as if she's intruding.
I open my mouth, but Ryan beats me to it. Her eyes find me, and she gives me a small smile. “I'm going to go, but I'll be back, okay?”
“You don't have-”
“Your mom woke me up and then we came straight here. I haven't eaten anything yet, so I'm going to find some food in this place. I'll be back,” she repeats as she finishes.
I don't want her to go. I just got her back. But she needs to eat, so I nod reluctantly. Ryan carefully leans down to give me a quick kiss before leaving the room as my family reenters. Mom, Dad, and Owen spend some time with me, talking to me, but I'm barely paying attention. For the first time in weeks, Ryan is in the same building as me, and we need to make up for lost time.
When she finally comes back, I grin at her. “You missed all the action, Ryan,” I say.
“I did? What happened?” She asks as she comes to stand to my right.
I move my left hand over my stomach, palm up, and she reaches out to hold it like I was hoping she would. “I'm being discharged. Are you ready to take care of me?”
Ryan laughs. “Of course, Gabe.”
“Good. Dad and Owen are going to take me home. Mom can take you back to your place so you can get your things and then you can come over.”
“Sounds like you have everything planned out,” she says.
“I do.”
“We should go; you'll be discharged soon,” Mom inputs.
She and Ryan leave, and I'm once again playing the waiting game. At least the next time I see her, we'll be alone. My arm goes into a sling, which I can already tell is going to be a pain, and soon I'm being dropped off at home to wait for Ryan. I go into my bedroom to attempt to change into more comfortable clothes. What I really want is a shower.
“Gabe?” Ryan calls out.
“In here.”
“Who's pants-less now?” She laughs as she walks in, sees me in boxers and a t-shirt, and sets her things down at the foot of my bed.
Chuckling, I wiggle my fingers for her to come over. “Help me with my shirt, please.” Ryan carefully helps me remove my shirt, her eyes traveling over my body. “Miss me?”
Her eyes snap up to mine. “So much.” Ryan rests her forehead over my heart as she wraps her arms tightly around me like I might disappear at any second.
With my hand on the back of her neck, I softly say, “Hey, what's the matter?”
“Nothing,” she answers, her warm breath hitting my skin. “I was pissy with your mom when she came to my door. Then she told me you were hurt, and I felt like I couldn't breathe. You scared me to death, Gabe. It could have been so much worse and then I wouldn't have ever told you I loved you because I was too damn stubborn to answer your calls. I just-”
I move my hand to her chin, a tear falling onto my hand. “Look at me,” I interrupt. Ryan lifts her head, and my thumb wipes away her tear-streaked cheeks. “I'm okay, Ryan.” Cupping her cheek as she leans her head into it, I add, “I'm right here with you. I'm fine, so don't worry about the 'what could have been'. Besides, I already knew you loved me. All I was worried about was making sure you knew I loved you too.”
Ryan frowns. “How did you know? I never told you, unless...” Her eyes widen. “You heard me? You've known all this time?” She doesn't sound angry, but she does seem a bit upset.
Nodding, I explain. “I was nearly asleep, but when you started talking, it woke me up. I'm sorry. It wasn't until you left me that I realized exactly how I felt about you. You not knowing killed me as much as you ignoring me. I didn't want to be just another person in your life who has let you down. You deserved better than that, and I wanted to make sure I could be what you deserved, someone worthy of you.”
Another tear falls, and I swipe it away, waiting for her to speak. “I love you, Gabe.” It seems like she can't find more words than that. Ryan smiles and adds, “I brought dinner. We should go eat before it gets cold. And just so you know, I expect a kiss every time I do something to take care of you.” Ryan smiles.
“Oh yeah? I may end up being a little helpless then.” She gives me one of her sexy laughs that I've missed so much. “Thank you for being here,” I add.
“There's nowhere else I'd rather be.” Ryan tilts her head, watching me for a moment. I wait to see if she's going to say something else. “You owe me a kiss, Officer.”
Without waiting even a second longer, I lean forward to press my lips against hers. That happy sigh comes immediately as I part her lips, slowly exploring her mouth as if I've never been there before. It's as passionate and heady as before, but this time it's infused with care and love. Ryan digs her fingers into my hair, nibbles on my lower lip, before deepening our kiss one more time.
When I pull away, my favorite sight is before me. Ryan's eyes are closed as she tries to savor what she felt for a few more moments. Her eyes open, and I grin.
“Let's go eat.”
We go to my kitchen and while Ryan is taking the burgers out of the bag from the fast food restaurant, a hint of a red heart tattoo can be seen through her thin white shirt. I reach out and run my fingers over the spot. Ryan stops, looks down at my hand, and then back to me.
“Why did you get this? All your tats mean something to you, but you never said anything other than you found it online and loved how it looked.” The more I think about it, th
e more curious I am. Ryan doesn't just get inked. There's always a meaning with each one, but I don't know what this heart means.
“I know I told you that if you were to get one, I didn't want you to get anything related to me because it should mean something to you, but you were a reason I got it and you do mean something to me.” I still don't understand, but Ryan continues in a ramble, something I've undoubtedly missed. “When I saw the heart, I was feeling vulnerable over you, and all I could think about was love. Love this and love that. It was annoying as hell, Gabe.
“But I needed this heart. At first, I thought it was because I needed a pretty and perfect heart next to my own not so pretty, not so perfect heart. Now though, I think I wanted it because I love you. You are the one person who I can tell anything to without worrying about expectations and even if it scared me, I could put my heart out there for you to see because I knew you would take care of it. It's a symbol of how I am with and because of you,” she finishes.
I smile. “You were always that way, Ryan. You just didn't know it yet.”
Epilogue
Ryan
Three Months Later...
I took care of Gabe, just as I said I would, until he was completely healthy again. He kissed me every time I helped him and even when I refused. He started asking for ridiculous or impossible things, cracking me up with his creativity, and every time I said no, he kissed me. It kind of sucked when he got better and didn't need me there as an excuse to help anymore. I stayed with him the entire time and with him healthy, I went back to staying at my apartment.
My parents and I remain at a standstill, but that's okay. I've started working at a convenience store with an awesome boss who works with me being in school. Earning my own money and spending that is such an awesome feeling. I try to spend my parents' money instead of my own. This way I can save it for whatever I do after college, and I can officially stop being dependent on my parents.
When I'm not working or in class, I find time to spend with Gabe. We've visited three more museums and a few galleries. I've been shooting with them too, and Gramps has become my biggest fan. Larry, Gabe's father, has even given me pointers on how to shoot better when Gabe was talking to one of the guys. Owen still harmlessly flirts here and there, which really irritates Gabe. Turns out he's a bit possessive over me, even with his own baby brother. It cracks me up sometimes. Owen has found a confidant in me, texting me with questions about girls. It's sweet that he thinks I give good advice.
Best of all, his mother loves me. We've had lunch together a few times, which she insisted upon. She wanted to know me like her son does. Camilla is almost a mother figure to me now. It's kind of weird if I think about too much, so I don't. His entire family has become family, really. They've accepted me as one of them, and that has been a wonderful experience.
“Are you coming or not, Ryan?” Gabe calls from my bathroom where he's waiting for me in our bubble bath.
“We're not taking a relaxed bath, so I guess the answer is only if you can make me,” I yell back, pressing play on my love playlist. When I turn, intending on going to join Gabe, he's walking toward me, dripping wet with suds sliding down his hard body. He picks me up in his arms, causing me to squeal. “You're getting me wet,” I laugh, feeling my clothes dampen thanks to him.
“That's the point,” he smirks.
“You're staying tonight,” I inform him as he begins stripping me down. It's been two weeks since he's stayed over because we've both been busy.
Gabe's hands still with the hem of my shirt bunched in his hands, his fingers brushing my side just below my bra. “I'm staying a lot longer than that, Ryan.”
“Promise?” I ask, not minding that he went from playful to serious so fast. I love when does. He tells me all the time what he's feeling and thinking. He never wants me to doubt it, and I never do.
“Absolutely.”
Acknowledgements
Thank you, reader, for taking the time to read my book. Please consider leaving a review to let other readers know what you thought!
A huge thanks goes to my beta readers: Andrekia, Ariana, Heidi, Louise, Lucy, Michael, and Rachel. Thank you for your time and being such a help with Ryan and Gabe's story. I love you all!
Thank you, Damonza, for giving me a cover I love and tweaking it until I was absolutely happy with it.
Thank you, Kathy from K² Editing, for working with me. You're always a pleasure to work it and I'm happy you're my editor.
Thank you, Mary Smith, for listening to as I whined about this book. When I was close to chunking it and forgetting Ryan and Gabe existed, you listened to me and supported me. Because of that, I was able to finish their story and give them what they deserved.
About the Author
Lindsay Paige is the author of the Bold as Love series, Don't Panic, and You Before Me. She is also the coauthor of The Penalty Kill Trilogy.
She has three passions in life: reading, writing, and watching hockey, especially the Pittsburgh Penguins. Among the pile of books to read, stories to write, and games to watch, Lindsay is also focused on completing college.
Lindsay resides in North Carolina and is inspired by world around her and the people in it. Many of the aspects in her books stem from her love for hockey and her struggles in life and with anxiety, as evident in Don't Panic.
She is currently working on numerous solo works and a couple of projects with coauthor Mary Smith as well.
For more information about the author, visit her blog or find her on Facebook, Twitter, or Pinterest. Stay update and enjoy awesome perks by signing up for her monthly newsletter.
Coming Soon
Be on the lookout for a New Adult Hockey Romance featuring new characters, Neil, Grant, and Winston. They are friends and teammates on a college hockey team, each having vastly different relationships with girls.
Lindsay Paige and Mary Smith are teaming up once again to bring you a new standalone series titled:
Oh Captain, My Captain.
Books by Lindsay Paige
(Links go to Lindsay's blog, where you can learn more about them)
Bold as Love series
Don't Panic
You Before Me
The Penalty Kill Trilogy with Mary Smith
You Before Me Page 21
