Lucas reread the incredibly thorough report. He’d complimented Phelps and his team of investigators on being so detailed, but the man admitted it had taken almost no effort to come up with all the facts. Everything was on record, out in the open for the world to see.
McKenna Sloan. She hadn’t even bothered to change her name. He wondered about that for barely a second before he concluded that it was just one more way McKenna punished herself. Anyone, anywhere, if they wished, could read about the atrocious things that had happened to her family. Things that McKenna no doubt blamed herself for. And why shouldn’t she when the state of Nebraska had done their best to prosecute her for the crimes?
What the bastard had done to her family was horrific, but what he had done to McKenna made Lucas want to rip the bastard apart. Too bad he was dead. Dying in a fire caused by a prison riot had been too good for him. He had escaped his punishment through death, but McKenna continued to punish herself even today.
That was why she didn’t want to form a relationship. Why she refused the slightest bit of companionship. She didn’t feel as though she deserved to be happy. He recognized the guilt. Lucas had lived with his own for years. It was something he had come to accept. McKenna hadn’t come to that point yet.
But there had to be more than that. Why did she seem so terrified? She wasn’t hiding from the law for the crimes. Though they had tried to prosecute her, all charges had eventually been dropped. So why the hell did she act as though someone or something was chasing her?
“So are you going to go after her now?”
He looked up to see Jared in the doorway. The man was determined to marry him off. Jared had married a year ago. Since then, when he wasn’t investigating something for Kane Enterprises, he was a harassing matchmaker.
“Nothing’s changed.”
“Like hell nothing’s changed. You now know the reasons she acts the way she does. From the looks of it, she needs you even more than you need her.”
“And what would you suggest I say to her when I find her? ‘McKenna, I’ve investigated your past and I want to fix your hurts’?” Lucas shook his head. He knew what he had done wasn’t something she would easily forgive.
“You don’t have to tell her anything, but now that you know, you can show her she’s safe with you.”
That wasn’t an issue. Lucas didn’t bother telling Jared that he knew for a fact that McKenna felt safe with him. That wasn’t what worried him. Trust wasn’t the problem. It was the fact that McKenna so obviously felt she didn’t deserve happiness. And how the hell could he explain that she deserved to be happy without telling her that he knew about her past? Damned if he would show her that her trust had been breached. If she knew, her faith in him would be completely gone.
Guilt niggled at him for having this information, but despite that, he’d do it again. She was clearly not going to tell him, and until he knew her problems, how could he fix them for her? Now he knew her problems—and, dammit, still had no idea how to fix them.
Aware that Jared waited for an answer, Lucas closed the file and stood. “McKenna knows she’s safe with me. That’s not an issue.”
“What is the issue, then? The damnable guilt?”
Lucas wouldn’t answer that question. Wouldn’t do any good. Jared’s parents had died when he was a child. Having been raised in orphanages and foster homes, he had welcomed working for IDC.
For Lucas it hadn’t been that simple. His father had expected Lucas to take over years ago. Because of his commitment to the agency, he hadn’t been able to do that. Though Phillip Kane had been proud of his son for serving his country, Lucas knew he’d also been disappointed.
Lucas hadn’t understood his father’s reluctance. What was the big deal of coming a little late to the company? It wasn’t as if Kane Enterprises would just disappear. It hadn’t; but his father had. To this day, Lucas would blame himself for not taking over sooner. If his father had been able to retire earlier, might he still have been alive today?
“Maybe if you go to McKenna and tell her about your own guilt, it will help her with hers.”
“You know I can’t tell her about the agency.”
“I’m not saying you have to tell her everything, but you can tell her enough to help her understand you know where she’s coming from.”
“Have you told Lara about your experience?”
Jared’s eyes widened, as if shocked Lucas had even asked. “Hell, no. That’d scare the shit out of her. Having her think of me as her loving and slightly geeky husband is exactly what I want…because it’s what she wants.”
Lucas studied his friend. Was that the way it should be? Secrets to make sure the other one stayed happy? Was that a real marriage? Hell, he hoped not. Jared claimed to be content, but how was that possible when the real you is hidden? Sounded like a miserable way to live.
Lucas shrugged off his disquiet. Jared’s life was his own. Talking about this stuff with anyone, even his best friend, was something he just wasn’t comfortable with. “Tell me what you’ve come up with on Humphries.”
“Not much more than what we knew before. Doesn’t appear to be gambling anymore, unless he’s doing it under an alias. Are you sure you don’t want to reconsider pressing charges for embezzlement?”
Lucas nodded grimly. Another thing Jared wouldn’t understand. Humphries had been a friend of his father’s. The older man’s resentment of Lucas had been vague at first but had grown as policies had shifted from his father’s old-school philosophies. Phillip Kane had been a good businessman and Lucas admired him tremendously. That didn’t mean Lucas didn’t have his own ideas. Humphries didn’t approve of those and apparently felt little loyalty toward him.
“We’ll just leave it as it is for now.”
Jared blew out a frustrated huff but didn’t pursue it further. He knew Lucas wouldn’t change his mind.
The opening of his study door brought his head around to see Conrad standing just inside the room.
“You have a visitor, sir.”
Lucas’s heart slammed against his chest. Conrad wouldn’t disturb him unless it was one particular visitor.
“McKenna?”
“Yes sir.”
The frown on Conrad’s face wasn’t normal. “What’s wrong?”
“She doesn’t appear well, sir. I took her to—”
Lucas shot out the door and headed to the north parlor. After that day last month, he had begun to think of it as McKenna’s room.
Stopping at the entrance, his eyes took in the wet and bedraggled-looking waif standing at the fireplace. “McKenna?”
She whirled around and reached out to grab the mantel as if she were having trouble standing. “I shouldn’t have come.”
Lucas stalked toward her, noting not only her soaked clothing but also the bright glaze of her eyes and the hot flush covering her pale cheeks, indicating a fever. Holding out his hand, he said, “This is the only place you should have come.”
She looked at his hand and shook her head. “I have a slight cold. I may be contagious.”
Cold? He doubted it. She had the flu, maybe worse. “I’m as healthy as an ox; I don’t catch colds. Have a seat and let me get you some tea.”
What he wanted to do was strip off her wet clothes, wrap her in blankets, and haul her off to a hospital. Even as sick as she was, she would resist him. So he would ease her into bed and call his family doctor. If she had to go to the hospital, he’d deal with her resistance then.
Before he could turn, he knew Conrad was there. “Would you mind getting us a cup of hot tea?”
“Not at all, sir,” Conrad said.
Her teeth chattering, McKenna sank onto the sofa. “It’s raining outside. Did you know?”
“It does that quite often here.”
“Yes, I suppose it does.” She blinked at him as if she were trying to stay awake. “Are you well?”
“Yes.” He looked down at her soaked feet. “Let’s get those shoes off so Conrad won’t fuss
about getting the carpets wet.”
As he had suspected, if she thought she was causing any kind of problem, that became an immediate concern. She slipped off her soaked running shoes. Lucas went to his knees, pulled off her wet socks, and held her slender, icy feet in his hands. Other than kissing her, this was the most intimate thing she’d ever allowed him to do. Stupid, but he suddenly felt a giant surge of arousal. Hell, if he ever got all of her clothes off, he’d explode immediately.
“Everything okay?”
Lucas looked over his shoulder at Jared, who stood in the doorway. Should’ve known his friend wouldn’t be able to resist meeting the woman Lucas had been obsessed with.
He turned back to McKenna to gauge her expression. The last thing he wanted was to alarm her. Jared’s dark scowl had frightened more than one person. Thankfully, McKenna didn’t seem to see his friend as any kind of threat.
“McKenna, this is a friend of mine, Jared Livingston. Jared, this is McKenna.”
McKenna gave a halfhearted smile to Jared and then looked down at Lucas, who was still kneeling. “I should have called first.”
“You did exactly as you should have.”
The sound of a rolling tea cart brought Lucas to his feet. Conrad placed it beside a small table and poured a cup. Without asking, he sweetened it with three sugar cubes and then gave it to Lucas.
Lucas sat beside McKenna and handed her the steaming liquid. “Drink.”
Her hands were shaking so badly he thought he might have to hold it for her. When he was assured that she could hold it herself, he shot Conrad a look. The man knew him well. With a small nod of understanding, Conrad walked out the door. Lucas’s doctor would be here within the half hour.
McKenna sipped the hot, soothing liquid and let the warmth seep into her bones. Both men stared down at her as if she had two heads. She probably looked like crap but couldn’t make herself care. She felt like crap.
She tried to ignore them as she concentrated on maintaining her grip on the cup in her hand. Taking slow, careful sips, McKenna willed herself to feel better. Coming here had been a stupid thing to do, but she didn’t know where else to go. She’d been in Northampton on a job and had suddenly felt so ill she knew she wouldn’t make it back to her apartment in Paris.
Stupid not to go to a hospital, but if she did, she might say something she didn’t want anyone to hear. She had fake identification, but if she was out of her head and said something incriminating to the wrong person, then everything could start all over again. She couldn’t bear that. Probably should have just gone to a hotel here and sweated it out. A nice one with room service that would deliver chicken soup or whatever it was she needed to get her well again.
She had called Noah but had given him only the barest of facts. Just that she had a bad cold and was taking a few days off. If she had told him how ill she was, he would have sent someone for her. Made sure she was taken care of.
Yes, she could have done any of those things, but she hadn’t. She had wanted to see Lucas. He was her safe haven. Whether she wanted to admit it to him or not, being with him gave her a feeling of completeness she’d never felt before. But that had to stop. Once she was better, she would leave. Maybe she should consider moving out of Europe. She only knew how to speak English and French, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t learn another language. It would be a new challenge.
Italy. She liked Italy…no, wait, that was still Europe. Where could she move? McKenna searched her foggy brain, her mind grappling for another country she could move to. For the life of her, she couldn’t come up with one. Were there any left?
“McKenna, I’m going to put you to bed now.”
Her head heavy on her shoulders, she looked up and blinked at the man standing in front of her. Lucas? Where had he come from? Her eyes tried to focus as his features blurred. “Lucas?”
Strong arms lifted her and she felt herself being carried somewhere. She didn’t care where Lucas took her as long as he didn’t let her go.
“I’m not going to let you go, McKenna. Ever.”
His voice, gentle and masculine at the same time, strummed through her senses like warm honey. A bout of shivering attacked her, dispelling the warmth. “So cold.”
“We’ll get you warm soon enough. Just hold on.”
She felt masculine hands tugging at her wet clothes. No…should try to stop them. No one had the right to touch her without her say-so. Then she heard Lucas again. His voice, soft but insistent, told her to relax; she had nothing to fear. Yes, everything was all right again. As long as Lucas was here, everything was all right. Sighing, she drifted into oblivion.
Fastening the last button of the shirt he’d managed to get on her, Lucas covered her still-shivering body with two blankets and a comforter. As he had undressed and then dressed her again with his shirt, she had struggled only a little. Now she was barely conscious.
He ignored his rampaging emotions and focused on his movements, his purpose. The doctor would be here soon. McKenna’s fever felt dangerously high…probably well over one hundred. The tea she’d drunk had temporarily stopped the shivering, but it had returned full force within minutes. He’d stupidly been about to ask her if she wanted another cup when she dropped the cup and almost crumpled at his feet. He’d been trying to be careful with her and had learned his lesson. No more.
He heard the door open and Dr. Scott’s brisk voice say, “I heard we have a very sick young woman here.”
Without taking his eyes from the sleeping McKenna, Lucas said, “She’s got a high fever, her pupils are dilated, and her breathing is labored. I think it’s either a severe case of flu or pneumonia.”
“Hmph. Sounds like you’re ready to make a diagnosis, young man. Mind if I take a look first?”
Normally he would have smiled at the doctor’s humor, but at this moment Lucas didn’t know if he’d ever smile again. He needed to get out of the room for just a moment. The fury was about to explode within him. For a short while he needed to be by himself. Then he would return and do what needed to be done.
Turning, he finally moved his gaze from McKenna to Dr. Scott, a man he’d known all of his life. “Absolute privacy is a must,” Lucas said quietly.
Though the doctor’s eyes held questions, he simply nodded and said, “Of course.”
Lucas swallowed. The words needed to be said because he couldn’t have the doctor questioning her later. He forced them from his frozen mouth. “She’s had a difficult life. I know you have to examine her, but when she wakes, I want no questions asked about the markings on her body.”
Compassion replaced the normal humor usually lurking in Dr. Scott’s eyes. “I wouldn’t dream of it, Lucas.”
Nodding his thanks, Lucas took one last look at the small, delicate-looking woman on the bed, then turned and stalked out the door. Closing it softly, he leaned against the wall and inhaled ragged breaths. Fury was bubbling, and he didn’t try to hold it in check. Before he went back, he would be in control again. But for now, he let it boil.
McKenna’s health came first. But once she was well, they were going to talk. She wouldn’t like some of the things he planned to discuss with her. For starters, he was going to ask two direct but very simple questions: Who the hell had put the scars on her body? And who the bloody fucking hell had branded her bottom with the letter D?
He already knew the answer to the second question. Damon Hughes, the sick dead fuck, had done it. But had he put the scars there also? If not, if whoever it had been wasn’t already dead, they would be, and soon. This he vowed.
eleven
Palm Beach
Damon paced back and forth beside the pool. Tomorrow was their wedding day. He had yet to tell her. He’d planned to reveal his surprise last night, but she’d still seemed so stiff and uncomfortable with him. Fear was healthy, as it would breed respect. But he was damn tired of her looking at him like he was some kind of monster. After everything he had done for her, how could she continue to look at him t
hat way?
Perhaps they needed to connect physically after all. He had planned to wait until after their vows were exchanged. Now he was thinking that was a mistake. Not only because he wanted to fuck her—he needed it and it was his right—but because she needed to see who was in charge. He had been too gentle with her, too loving. It was clear she was taking advantage of him. This he could not allow.
After they were married, she would have ample time to fall in love with him again. He had been charming, attentive, and generous, and it had gotten him nowhere. Tomorrow was their wedding day, but today he would show her exactly what she had to look forward to.
Maybe they could take a walk on the beach beforehand. By necessity, a brick wall enclosed his mansion, but only a few yards outside the wall was a beautiful beach she had yet to see. Yes, they would walk, and when they returned, he would wine her, dine her, and show her how wonderful their life would be. And tomorrow they would marry.
Hearing a sound, he looked up to see her walk toward him. She was still so very beautiful, and she was all his. Though her breasts were larger than they’d been when she was a teenager, she seemed more slender than she had years before, but that was because he hadn’t been there to take care of her. He would make sure she stayed healthy.
Beneath her short cover-up, he could see she wore the most modest of the swimsuits he’d given her. Still, it revealed her luscious body, and that pleased him, so he refrained from chastising her. He held out his hand for her to come to him. Her mouth stretched slightly as if it was an effort to smile; there were still shadows and doubt in her eyes.
His patience holding by a mere thread, he gestured at the sparkling water. “I had this pool built for you. I remember how you loved to swim.”
For just an instant uncertainty flickered in her eyes. Then she smiled and said, “It’s beautiful, but we just ate breakfast…. I’ll just lie in the sun for a while.”
“Come now…that’s an old wives’ tale.” He pulled off his robe, revealing that he wore his swim briefs. He saw her eyes sweep over his body and he hardened with arousal. Two hours a day in his gym, honing his body to peak condition, and it was all for her. Early in his youth, Damon had realized he was extraordinary-looking; age had only improved him. He was proud to be able to show his masculinity off to her. “Let’s swim, and then I’ll let you rub sunscreen on me.”
Last Chance Page 12
