Gracie scrunched her nose. “What’s that mean?” She asked, throwing herself down in the sand beside him.
“It’s from the Bible,” he told her. “There’s a story in there it that says a wise man will build his house on a rock so the wind and waves will not destroy it, while a foolish man will build his house in the sand, where it may stand for a day, but in times of trouble, the waves and wind will wash away the walls, and the house will crumble.”
Even as he spoke, a larger wave snaked around the driftwood wall and the newly repaired moat filled with water. Small chunks of the sand wall crumbled and fell into the moat. Gracie groaned in disappointment. “But we worked so hard!” Gracie whined.
“I guess that just proves that if something is really important to you, you should take the time to build it right, and in a strong safe place that won’t wash away with the next high tide.” Steve watched another wave surge around the castle, gauging out more chunks of the wall. The far right corner, undercut by the breaker, collapsed and fell into the moat.
“Why’d we even bother?” She growled unhappily.
“Well, we had fun building it, didn’t we?”
Gracie shrugged. “I guess,” she conceded.
“Some things aren’t meant to last forever. Like making homemade ice cream, or spending a day at the beach.”
“Yeah but I didn’t want it to fall so soon.” She complained again.
A whistle sounded off to their right and Steve saw the counselors gathering near the snack bar. It was time to gather their things and walk back to the ferry.
Gracie flopped onto her back with a great sigh. “I don’t want it to be over yet,” she told Steve sadly.
Me either, Steve agreed with her silently. Aloud he said, “Maybe you can come back another day soon.” He pulled her to her feet and they walked back toward the snack bar.
Gracie shook her head. “We don’t ever come to the beach. Grandma says the sun gives her a headache.”
“What about your Grandpa?” Steve asked in surprise, recalling many summer days at the beach with David and his family during his childhood.
Gracie wrinkled her nose in resignation. “He just reads the newspaper and watches the Weather Channel. He says that he’s too old to go to the beach.” Gracie paused and looked up at Steve suspiciously. “Can you get too old to go to the beach?”
Steve shrugged. “I suppose so. I’m sure he wouldn’t lie to you,” he answered carefully.
Gracie sighed again. “Anyway,” she went on glumly. “We don’t ever go.”
“Don’t worry,” Steve consoled her. “You’re getting older. I bet next year you’ll have a couple of friends with moms and dads who will take you with them to the beach.”
Gracie seemed encouraged by the possibility.
Then they were back among the rest of the group and Gracie was gone, collecting her little day pack and finding her sandals among all the other little sandals that were scattered in the sand. They lined up one more time and tiredly trudged up the dune they had raced over only a few hours before.
Back at Park headquarters, Steve waited while the children climbed up in to the big white activity bus. He waved good bye, but as he turned to head back to the office, he caught sight of Gracie waving happily at him out of the window of the bus. He grinned and waved too. Thank you God, he breathed, for a day at the beach with my daughter. It was a strong foundation stone for the relationship he hoped to build with her. A sense of peace filled him. He no longer doubted that God was in control, and he knew that God would provide another opportunity to them to be together very soon.
Carrie Bauer, the other ranger who worked at the Visitor’s Center with him, met him at the door. Her face was anxious. “The daycare called almost an hour ago. Cody’s running a fever and throwing up. Is it okay if I leave early?”
Steve had a new understanding of what it meant to be a worried parent. “Sure,” he replied kindly.
Carrie sighed in relief. “Thanks,” she said, smiling gratefully. “All camper reservations have signed in and paid the fees. We’ve still got about twenty visitors on the island.”
“Go!” Steve urged her. “I can handle things here. Go take care of your son, and I hope that it’s nothing too bad.”
Carrie flashed him a worried half smile, her mind already down the road with her little boy at the daycare center. She grabbed her purse out of the drawer and hurried out to her car.
Steve drew a deep breath and released it slowly, actually grateful to have a few minutes to think about today’s events. He sat down at his desk and absentmindedly pulled a stack of papers toward him, figuring this would be a good opportunity to catch up on some long neglected filing. He pulled open the filing cabinet and began dropping the sheets in the proper jackets. Two minutes into the project the door burst open, and Laurie, the dark haired counselor he’d spoken with on the top of the sand dune, walked in the door with Gracie in tow.
Steve’s heart skyrocketed joyfully at the sight of her, but immediately a wave of fear replaced his initial pleasure. “What’s wrong?” he demanded anxiously.
Laurie smiled apologetically. “Well, we’ve got a problem and a favor to ask.” She glanced at Gracie. “Her grandparents were supposed to meet us here to pick her up. They were heading to Virginia on a vacation, and they thought, since they had an afternoon appointment in New Bern, it would be easier to pick her up from here instead of going all the way back to Jacksonville.”
“And?” Steve asked politely as she seemed to stall in the middle of her explanation.
Laurie took a deep breath and plunged on.” “Well, they had a flat tire, the appointment ran over, just one thing after another, and what it all boils down to is, they are heading this way from New Bern now, but we need to get the rest of these kids back to the center, where their parents are waiting to pick them up. Is there any chance,” she asked pleadingly, “you could let Gracie wait with you? They shouldn’t be more than 20 minutes, tops.” She finished in a rush.
Steve raised a quizzical eyebrow. “How does Mrs. Bolton feel about that? Won’t she be upset with you for dumping your charge on someone else?” Steve asked cautiously.
“No, no,” Laurie assured him quickly. “I’ve been on the phone with her. This was her idea, actually. She feels really bad about holding up the entire field trip, and said if it was okay with the ranger on duty, she would be all right with Gracie waiting here for a few minutes.”
Still, Steve hesitated. There was nothing he would like better, of course, but what would Mrs. Bolton say when she realized whom she had left Gracie with? More than anything, Steve wanted to avoid a scene with Gracie’s grandparents, especially a scene that Gracie would witness. He cleared his throat nervously. “What do you say, Gracie? You wouldn’t be scared waiting here with me?”
“She told me she knew you already,” Laurie broke in. “You’ll be fine, won’t you, Gracie?”
Gracie nodded her head slightly, but she didn’t look at Steve. He realized that she sensed his hesitation, and she was embarrassed to be passed off this way by her counselor.
“So you don’t mind then?” Laurie said brightly, determined to take his silence as acquiescence. She ruffled Gracie’s hair affectionately. “Well, that’s settled. You be a good girl, and your grandparents will be here in no time at all.” Laurie strode to the door and a moment later, they could hear the sound of the bus shifting into gear and rumbling out of the parking lot.
Steve stared at Gracie, wondering what he should do with a six year old for thirty minutes. “So…” Steve began, casting around for something to say. “So, Gracie is a pretty name,” he said lamely. “Did you know that there once was a princess named Grace? She lived in a palace on an island called Monaco.” Good one, Steve, he told himself derisively.
Gracie nodded solemnly. “Grandpa always calls me his little princess. He says I’m a going to be a great princess, because I’m already good at giving orders.”
The room was silent again,
and both ranger and girl stared at the walls uncomfortably. This is a disaster, Steve thought sourly. He looked out the window and stared down the long dock, where the ferry they had just returned on was tied up.
The ferry! Steve smiled. “So, do you want to sit here, or do you want to come with me down to the ferry and help wash down the boat? Or are princesses not allowed to clean boats?”
Gracie lit up. “Yeah!” She exclaimed, suddenly animated again. “Let’s go!” She grabbed Steve’s hand and pulled him out the door and down to the dock. Steve turned on the hose, then he handed a scrub broom to Gracie and saluted the first mate, who was picking up trash and putting away the tiny child sized life preservers.
“Ranger Steve and Princess Gracie, reporting for cleanup duty, sir.”
Walter, the first mate, was one of their volunteers from the Swansboro Senior Center. Long limbed and wiry, Walter eyed Gracie and Steve with faded blue eyes. “Princess Gracie, is it?” He asked unimpressed. “Never heard of a princess hosing down a boat.”
Gracie’s face dropped for a moment in disappointment. Then she put a small finger to her lips. ‘Shhhh!” she said in a stage whisper. “He wasn’t supposed to tell you that I’m a princess... I’m hiding from the pirates over there!” She pointed to a group of kayakers paddling through the sound. “They’re gonna kidnap me if they find me!”
The old man suddenly grinned good naturedly at her imaginative comeback. “Pirates, is it now? Well, we can’t have that, can we, your grac-y-ness.” He added with a little bow.
Gracie giggled.
“No ma’am, don’t you worry. Those pirates won’t come near here!” He promised. He stepped up on the hull and held onto an awning pole for support. “You pirates there!” He shouted at the mystified kayakers. “You might as well keep on going! You’ll find no princesses on this ship. Just us sailors and this here cabin boy – uh- I mean, girl.”
The kayakers paused as they listened to the old man. They looked from one to another, and shrugged. “Okay, Grandpa,” one teenage boy shouted back. “Whatever you say.” He turned to his friends and faked a deep gravelly voice. “C’mon mateys, we’ll go pillage the other ferry – they’re bound to have a princess or two on board!”
The other boys laughed and responded with some fairly respectable “Arrrgh’s” and the occasional threat to “make ‘em walk the plank!” as they paddled past the ferry dock.
The old man glanced up at Steve’s open mouth and permitted a tiny twinkle in his eye. “My grandson,” he explained. Then he turned to Gracie. “Whom I recently discovered has become a pirate.” He shook his head sadly. Gracie stared from the first mate to the kayakers uncertainly. “He really is a pirate?” She asked in awed tones.
“Tis a source of sadness for his mother,” he intoned solemnly, bowing his head for a moment of reflection on the family tragedy. Then he straightened up and rubbed his hands together. “Well, now that the danger is averted, let’s get to work.” He turned to Gracie. “So, your Grac –y – ness, do you still want to learn the chores of a cabin boy..eh, girl, today?”
Gracie nodded her head vigorously. Walter turned to Steve. “Ranger Williams, if you would kindly hand over the water hose, I’ll help our little lost princess to get started on her second career as a cabin girl.”
By the time that Gracie’s grandparents arrived, the three of them had managed to scrub the ferry clean, and all of them were noticeably wetter than necessary.
Steve, who had been watching for their arrival, had decided it might be better not to let them see him up close. In all likelihood, they had no idea that they had agreed to leave Gracie with him, and a meeting now might cause an unpleasant scene.
“Gracie!” Steve called out sharply as Richard and Lee Ann Bolton walked hesitantly around the side of the Visitor’s Center, “Gracie, give me the hose, it’s time for you to go.”
Gracie immediately grew upset and stamped her feet. “But we’re almost done!” She whined unhappily. “I don’t want to go until we get done!”
Steve sighed. “Your grandparents are here, sweetie. Weren’t you all heading to Virginia or somewhere this weekend?”
Gracie’s attitude changed in an instant. “Water World!” She exclaimed happily.
“Yeah, I thought so,” Steve commented dryly. Now give me the hose and get going,” Steve admonished the little girl. “It sounded like your grandparents have already had a tough enough day.”
Gracie gave Walter and the boat a regretful look. “I’ve got to go now.” She told him. “I’m sorry I didn’t finish all my chores, Walter.”
Walter cleared his throat. “Well, you did right good for a princess. If you ever want to practice being cabin girl again, you just come on out here, Okay?”
Gracie grinned in delight at the invitation. “Yes sir!” She cried. Then she handed the hose to Steve. “Thank you, Mr. Steve! It was really fun today. I like being the cabin girl!”
Steve smiled wistfully at his daughter, fighting the urge to give her a hug. Instead he took a deep breath and forced a neutral smile. “Well, I enjoyed having you here today. I hope you can come back again sometime.”
“Me too,” she replied seriously.
Steve cleared his throat. “Get going now, and don’t forget to get your day pack out of my office!”
“Okay!” Gracie yelled over her shoulder as she raced to meet her grandparents. The couple paused and peered out at Steve, who held up the hose as evidence that he was unable to go meet them, and waved good bye. Finally, the Bolton’s waved back, and followed Gracie into the Center.
Steve turned back to Walter with a sigh. “So what’s left? He asked.
Walter shrugged. “Nuthin’. We were done ten minutes ago, but your little princess wouldn’t quit.”
Steve grinned ruefully. “Thanks for putting up with her, then. I owe you one, Walter.” He stepped off the ferry and rewound the hose on its hanger, then headed slowly back to the Visitor’s Center.
He felt oddly out of sorts about avoiding the Bolton’s today, for some reason. He was fairly certain that now, with them planning to head out of town for a weekend was probably not the best time to confront them about Gracie. Besides, he told himself, it wasn’t for him to choose. God was writing this script. He would choose the right opportunity to speak with Lee Ann and Richard Bolton. But what if this had been the opportunity? No, he told himself firmly. KAIROS. When the right time came, he wouldn’t be wondering. God would make sure he knew. In the meantime, he just needed to be thankful for the wonderful day he had been able to spend with Gracie.
He reached in his pocket and rubbed his worry stone. Pete had sent it to him shortly after his accident, and when he had become discouraged, he had gotten in the habit of rubbing the stone and reminding himself of the miracle he had experienced that day on Moore’s Knob.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and
lean not on your own understanding.
The verse was engraved in the smooth surface, and like a blind person reading Braille, his fingers had come to recognize each word by touch alone. It was his constant prayer stone, and as usual, after a few moments of meditation on the words, he felt refreshed and uplifted with the assurance that God was in control.
Feeling he had somehow passed a test of some sort, he reached for the door of the Visitor’s Center with a sense of peace in his heart, and a more positive attitude than he had had as he watched Gracie dash off to join her grandparents.
Steve rounded the corner to his office and stopped short. The Bolton’s had not left yet, as he had supposed. The three of them stood huddled in front of his desk, and Lee Ann Bolton was holding something. They all looked up as he appeared, and he saw that Mrs. Bolton had tears in her eyes. She had taken a picture from his desk; a picture of David, Sarah and Steve, sitting on the porch swing in the Bolton’s back yard at their graduation party. Lee Ann herself had taken it with his camera just hours before the accident.
Steve had found the picture forgotten in
a drawer of his old bedroom when he had come home last summer. The innocence of the moment had struck him, and he found he could look at the picture of the three of them without the old guilt. And despite all that had happened since, that had been one of the last times he had been young and completely happy. He had enlarged the photo and framed it; then a couple of weeks ago he had suddenly decided to bring it to work.
Steve took a deep breath and spoke to Sarah’s mother for the first time in over five years. “It was our last perfect afternoon. I’m glad you took the picture.”
They were silent, and Steve searched their faces for signs of hate or anger, but he did not see it. They simply seemed caught off guard by the memory, as frozen in time as the three teenagers in the picture.
Time. Kairos. Steve suddenly realized that this was it. He cleared his throat nervously. Now that it was here, he was terrified of what the next few minutes would bring.
“I’ve – I’ve wanted to tell you both,” he began, finding it hard to speak through the lump that had suddenly formed in his throat, “how sorry I am for what happened. I destroyed so many lives that night, and I know I deserve all the anger and hatred you feel about me, but I also want you to know that I loved Sarah too! I could never have willingly done anything to hurt her.” Lee Anne’s eyes were huge and wet with tears. Her hand shook as she clutched the picture frame. Richard remained stonily silent. “I never quit hoping,” he said quietly. “All those years I never really gave up hope. I just wanted you to know how sorry I am that she is gone.”
He tried to smile reassuringly at Gracie, who seemed to be trying to hide behind her grandfather’s long legs. She stared back uncertainly.
“Gracie’s a great kid,” he said, trying to fill the silence. “I really enjoyed hanging out with her today. You’re doing a great job with her.”
The silence was unnerving. Steve gave a curt nod. Apparently, they still wanted nothing to do with him. A cold emptiness filled him. He had prayed for this moment for so long, and it seemed that nothing had changed. The wall of silence remained. “Right. I’m sorry for the intrusion. I’ll wait outside while you get Gracie’s things.” He looked down at his daughter, who was now staring at him as blankly as were her grandparents. He smiled bleakly. “Good bye, Gracie.” He turned and reached for the door.
Far Country Page 19
