Make Music With Me

by Kristine Allen

  “Holy sweet fucking Jesus, babe. Fucking A. That was… damn.”

  She wiped her mouth with the back of one hand and my heart pounded as her swollen lips curled up in a sexy smirk.

  Gently raising her by her hair that was still wrapped in my hands, I kissed her. And I didn’t give a flying fuck that I could taste myself on her tongue. Walking her backward to the bed, I lifted her by the ass and sat her on top of the comforter.

  Breaking free from the kiss, she scooted back on the bed to rest her head on the pillows. “We’ll have to be creative with this.” She pointed at her perfectly rounded abdomen. Did it make me strange that I thought her being pregnant made her more beautiful? Because it did. It made her even sexier than I thought she was that first day I saw her. Made her more mine.

  “Turn over. On your knees.” The commanding tone of my voice had her eyes widening and her body rapidly following my directive. “Goddamn, that’s a beautiful sight. Look at that pretty pussy.” Kneeling between her legs, I pushed her knees wider with mine. Unable to resist, I ran my fingers through her soaking wet pussy and slipped a finger deep inside. My teeth clenched when she immediately gripped it tight.

  “Please.” Her gasping plea preceded another spasm of her already tight channel.

  “Please what?”

  “Please, I want you inside me. Condoms. Drawer.” Her hand waved drunkenly toward her nightstand. Irrational anger that she had condoms, therefore she may have fucked someone since we’d been together last, ate at me. Grabbing her hair again, I slowly lifted and turned her head to make her look at me.

  “Who’s been in this pussy since me?” My words fanned across her cheek and I added another finger to her soaking wet sheath.

  “What?”

  “Have you fucked anyone since you left me?”

  “No! No one.” That was the answer I was hoping for. It drove the animal inside me wild. A primitive beast within beat his chest and wanted to visibly mark her as mine.

  “Good. No one, and I mean no one, gets this but me.” I ground out the words as I thrust my fingers deep, curling them as I slid them back out. “There hasn’t been anyone for me either, because the thought of being inside any other pussy but yours made me sick. I’m not fucking you with a piece o’ shit condom. Nothing will touch inside you but my bare skin when we fuck. You hear me?” I was tired of using kid gloves with her. Whether she wanted to admit it yet or not, she was mine.

  “Yes.” Her whisper was full of longing and it was all I could take. Grasping my cock in one hand, I lined it up with her wet center. Tugging slightly on her long locks, I shoved myself in her to the hilt.

  “Motherfucker.” No matter how badass I may have thought I was, I gasped at how damn good she felt. It was like she was created by the gods for me and me alone, because she fit me like a goddamn glove. Memories of the last time we were together flooded my head. Being buried deep inside her took my breath away as every muscle strained to hold back my desire to come inside her immediately.

  “Levi… Jesus, please… for the love of God… move!” Desperation colored her request. Shaking myself from my pleasure-induced daze, I slowly withdrew before slamming back inside. Then I froze again.

  Shit.

  “Fuck, I forgot… the baby. I’ll go easy.” How the hell I was going to manage that? It took every last bit of restraint I had to hold myself steady and glide slowly in and out through her slippery, snug channel. The demon that lay dormant deep in my soul stirred.

  “Nooooo. Are you serious right now? The baby is fine. Trust me when I tell you she is well protected in there. You’re not gonna hit her in the head with your cock, for Christ’s sake. God, Levi, please. Fuck. Me.” I was pretty sure she spoke the last through clenched teeth.

  Shoving my cock to the hilt as hard as I could, I damn near swallowed my fucking tongue. “Goddammit, Poppy. I’m convinced this pussy of yours is bathed in some kind of voodoo magic potion, because hell if I have any ability to hold back. At least, not when you’re squeezing my cock with it like a motherfucking vise.”

  Fuck, I had tried to be kind.

  I’d tried to be sweet.

  I’d tried to be easy on her. I really had.

  Regardless of the amount of training I’d had in patience and self-control, I was unraveling fast. Let’s face it. There are times in a man’s life when no matter what he does, his control goes out the sonofabitchin’ window. That was one of those times.

  Unleashed, the greedy beast within surged to the forefront. My hips moved with a mind of their own, led by my cock who thought of nothing but its own feelings. Within seconds the only sounds in the room were the slapping of sweaty skin, grunts, and her moans and whimpers.

  “How’s that for moving?” Gritting my teeth, I leaned over her arched back, pulled her head back, and buried my nose against her neck. Taking a deep breath, I fed my craving with her scent, savoring the high she sent racing through my veins. I closed my eyes.

  I stroked slowly in and out. Every little addicting thing about her washed over me as I glided my other hand from her hip to her tit and back. Skimming my teeth along her shoulder, I tasted the curve of her neck. After memorizing the feel, scent, and taste of her skin, I resumed fucking her like a man possessed.

  We became one with each glide of my shaft into her, covered in sweat from our efforts. It glistened along her spine, and like I’d climbed a damn mountain, it ran from my brow into my eyes.

  “I want you to come on my cock. Right fucking now.” Everything I said was punctuated with a stroke into her soft warmth. “I’m going to flood your pussy with my cum and I want yours in return.”

  Her answer was a whimper and a tightening of her walls around me. Continuing my assault, I relished each soft groan that accompanied my cock bottoming out in her. “Give it to me,” I growled in a guttural tone.

  “Levi. I’m… I’m gonna… oh God… yesss, I’m coming. Fuck, I’m coming. I’m….” Offering no reprieve from the sensations she was experiencing, I continued to plunge deep within her as her walls spasmed tightly around me. It felt so damn good, and I knew it might very well be the end of me, but I couldn’t stop.

  With each aftershock that shuddered through her, I felt my pending release looming closer and closer. It was like being on a roller coaster as it clicked to the top of the highest rise, the anticipation building exponentially. The roar that escaped me accompanied the tensing of every muscle in my body as the coaster crested the hill and plunged. One final thrust had white spots flashing behind my closed eyes.

  My mind went absolutely blank. It was as if every good thing I’d ever experienced in my life hit me at the same time—and it was all centered in my dick. Like, it was that good.

  So good that if I ever lost her, sex with anyone else would forever fall flat. If I could ever get it up for anyone else.

  I’d always thought sex was sex, and an orgasm was just as good with one woman as the next. That was before I experienced sex with someone I love.

  Maybe that’s why I couldn’t find it in me to sleep with anyone else since she’d left Seattle. Deep down, maybe I knew no one else would come close to matching how incredible fucking was with her. Because it wasn’t just fucking. Not even when it was rough, wild, and dirty. It was always making love.

  As I pressed featherlight kisses along her spine, I knew she was it for me. If she wouldn’t have me, I’d live out the rest of my life in a lonely, solitary existence.

  “Stay With Me”—Sam Smith

  “Come back to Seattle with me.” The words rumbled through his chest where my head rested. Shock had me jerking upright to look him in the eye.

  “What? You can’t be serious. I have nothing up there.” The narrowing of his eyes should have been my first clue that what I’d said was not even remotely what he wanted to hear. Foolishly, I kept running my mouth. “My house is here, my mom, John, my friends….”

  Open mouth, insert foot.

  He sat up, looking at me incredulously. “Re
ally? What the fuck, Poppy? What about me? You know… your baby’s father. Does that not count for anything? Besides, the recording company that wants to sign us is there. You don’t have a job here anymore. You could find something there. Hell, you could work for the band. You could be our travel coordinator or some shit. Do what you did for John, but for us. I’m sure there’s something like that up there.”

  “Have you even told your family about the baby?” By the expression on his face, I knew he hadn’t. Shoving the sheet off me, I moved to climb out of the bed. His strong arms snaked around me and he pressed my back to his front, his long legs on either side of mine.

  “Look, Logan knows.” A deep breath preceded the rest. “I wanted to sit down and tell Mom and Dad face-to-face.” His chin rested on my shoulder and he nudged my hair out of the way to rub his nose on my neck. “I was hoping we could tell them together.”

  I didn’t know how I felt about that. No, I did. It terrified me. Mac and Linda meant a lot to me and their approval was important to me. It was a huge part of the reason I hadn’t told them either. It made me realize I was being a hell of a hypocrite.

  “I’m sorry. I don’t know why I was getting mad at you for not telling them, when I never told them. Hell, I didn’t even tell you, and you’re the father.” It made me feel like a huge piece of shit, thinking about it. All my rationale had been weak and was nothing more than an excuse.

  “Hey. We decided we weren’t going to dwell on shit we couldn’t change. No looking back, only forward. Right?” The movement of his lips against the shell of my ear sent shivers running down my spine. After the sexual marathon we’d just completed, I should be exhausted. Except I couldn’t seem to get enough of him.

  Even though I’d tried not to compare my feelings for Lucas with the ones I had for Levi, every so often they slipped into my head. Lucas had been that warm fire on a cool night, burning steady and low. Levi still reminded me of a tornado that dropped down on me, threw my thoughts, beliefs, and emotions to the four winds, and left me upside down and shaken.

  Closing my eyes, I sighed. “Yeah, it’s hard, though. Especially when I know I was wrong. And I worry I’m still wrong.”

  “Wrong for what? Having feelings? Grieving? Needing to feel safe? Loved? What part of any of that is wrong? It shouldn’t matter who you’re with if you’re happy. Do you love me, Poppy?”

  The question caught me so off guard, I was speechless. Did I love him?

  “I….”

  “Don’t feel pressured to answer. If you can’t say it without hesitation, then maybe you’re not ready. But I’ll tell you this—I fucking love you. I’ve loved you forever. I think I loved you before I’d ever seen you. Before I even knew you existed, I prayed for you. The first time I saw you and heard your voice, I knew you were who I’d been waiting for. Lucas was interested in you, though, and bro code ruled. I wasn’t poaching. The fact that you belonged to my brother killed me. I told myself I would take you in my life in whatever way the good Lord decided. But deep down inside, I was angry that he’d found you first. I guess that was another reason his death ripped me to shreds. Not only had I lost my twin brother, I felt like it might be my fault he was gone. Because I had wished for you to be mine instead.” Inked arms squeezed me tight as a kiss was pressed to my head.

  Blinking rapidly, I tried to process all he’d said. He loved me.

  Did I deserve that? Could I reach out, stretch my fingertips to grasp his love? Was it okay? My heart still ached for the loss of Lucas, but it fluttered at the possibilities in front of me. It flew at the thought of Levi loving me.

  If I dug deep and through the layers of hurt, loss, and guilt… I had to admit, I’d loved Levi even when I’d been with Lucas. While I’d loved Lucas. Maybe it wasn’t the same way I’d loved Lucas, but it was love just the same. Since then, it had evolved, grown… flourished. Even though I’d kept it smothered and hidden.

  “But I do. I do love you. I’m just so afraid. Afraid of losing you. Afraid of everything being taken from me again. When I told you I didn’t think I’d survive that, I meant it.” Turning in his arms, I framed his face with my hands. “I want to give this a chance. I really do. Just be patient with me. The only other thing I ask is, don’t ask me to marry you. Not yet. It may sound superstitious, but I feel like if we got engaged or married… well, with my track record, that I would lose you too. I’m not strong enough to lose you.” Tears washed across my eyes, blurring his handsome face.

  “More than anything, I want you with me, but I’ll wait as long as it takes. As long as you’re mine, I don’t care how much time you need. You tell me when you’re ready. I’ll be right by your side.” Gazing deep into my eyes, he appeared to see into my soul. Hesitation was written all over his face. “But… I have to go back. We have a band to get off the ground. The producer that contacted the band wants us to meet with him to discuss contracts on Friday. Hopefully this is only the start of the band’s future and we only go up from here. I thought I could walk away from the band if it meant never seeing my child, but that’s when I thought there couldn’t be an ‘us.’ God knows, I don’t want to leave you, but I have to go. This isn’t just my dream….”

  The tears that had threatened earlier fell. Gently, he wiped them with his thumbs before kissing my cheek. I knew how much music meant to him. I knew how much the band was a part of that dream. I didn’t want to be the reason he gave up that dream, but change was scary.

  Swallowing the lump in my throat, I searched his eyes. For the answers? Maybe. For courage? Definitely.

  There were a lot of things I would miss about Florida, but if I was honest with myself and my heart, what was any of it worth without him in our life?

  “Okay.” The single word was a whisper.

  “Okay?” The biggest smile stretched across his face, his dimple making my belly flip. Pulling my bottom lip between my teeth, I nodded.

  “I just need to get my house straight so I can put it on the market. So I won’t be able to go right away, but if you’ll wait for me, I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

  “Goddamn, baby. I’m so fucking happy right now. My heart might damn near beat out of my chest. I promise, I’ll do everything in my power to make you happy.” Running his hand in circles around my belly, he continued, “You and our baby girl.”

  “Why do I feel like we’re being crazy?” Flutters in my chest began to spread tingles to my extremities.

  “We’re not. We both loved Lucas, and he loved us. We would have never done anything to hurt him. But we have to face the fact that no matter how much it destroyed us, we lost him. He wouldn’t want us to be alone and miserable, he would want us both to be happy. If that means together, then I have a hard time believing he would fault us.”

  Suddenly exhausted mentally and physically, I extricated myself from his arms and legs and lay on my side. With a sigh, I asked, “Would you grab that tube of cocoa butter off the nightstand? I need to put some on my fat gut.”

  Narrowing his eyes, he gave me a look that said he was on the verge of smacking my ass for saying I was fat. At my sheepish grin, he shook his head once, and my heartbeat skipped at the gentle tip of his lips. His hand held out, I watched that slight tip spread to the most dazzling smile. Complete with that irresistible dimple.

  “Let me do it?” The earnest and eager expression on his face warmed my heart. Shrugging, I motioned for him to go ahead.

  Squirting a blob of the sweet-smelling cream into his hand, he rubbed them together to warm it, then began to apply it to my skin. Slowly, methodically, he circled, swirled, and arched his hands around my rounded belly. I was afraid to see how big I would be when I hit my last month if I was this big now. The doctor had assured me there was only one baby in there, but I still remained skeptical every time I looked at the ever-expanding lump.

  When he lay beside me with his head in line with our baby, my lips quirked. I gave a shudder at the tickle I experienced when he kissed the taut skin. “Hello, swe
etheart. It’s me, your daddy. Even though I’ve only known about you for a few short days, I love you more than anything in my life. I pray I will be a good dad and that you’ll love me too. Be good to your mommy while I’m gone. God, I can’t wait to see you.”

  With another kiss, he began singing to the baby nestled within me. Emotion overwhelmed my heart and had my chest nearly bursting. The rich tenor of his voice gave me goose bumps as he sang Puddle of Mudd’s “Blurry.” Trailing off on the last note, he locked his blue gaze on mine. Happiness radiated from every inch of his beaming face.

  Feathering my fingers through his hair, I enjoyed the comfortable silence. When his head jerked up from where it rested on our baby, surprise lit his expression. “Did you see that?”

  “Umm, yeah, I saw that, but I felt it too.” Laughter lilted my voice as I rolled to my back.

  “Does she do that a lot?” Rising to his elbows, he spread his hands across my abdomen. Incredulous, he stilled, waiting.

  “Yeah. But she must have really liked it when you sang to her.”

  “You like Daddy singing to you?” It was so cute watching him talk to my belly button. “Sail to the Moon” by Radiohead was the next song he crooned to the dancing little bugger. It was evident she loved his voice because in the frame of his hands, a raised area appeared, as if she was pushing her head closer to hear him better. For all I know it could have been her little butt. Except something told me she really was all ears for his voice.

  Allowing the soothing tones to wash over me, I closed my eyes and enjoyed the moment.

  My last thought as I dozed off was how I could get used to this every night.

  The last day we had together flew by too damn fast. Levi had only been gone for a day. It was Friday and for the hundredth time I check my phone for the time. The lit-up numbers mocked me because I knew he and the guys were sitting down with the label, producers, and their newly acquired lawyer to negotiate a contract. Crossing my fingers, I prayed it would go well for them. I waited anxiously for his call to tell me what they came up with.