by Carnal, MJ
The arms holding me go rock hard at the mention of Brandon. Not what he was expecting to hear. But then again, he wasn’t exactly planning on football Saturday turning into this mess.
“Here, hold this,” Greg says, placing something over the back of my head.
Axel adjusts his hold on me and stands from his crouched position on the porch. I can feel him walking through the house to the living room. I can hear the sounds of people moving around the room. Axel sits down on the couch but doesn’t release me.
“Sit up, Princess. Let’s take a look at your back, yeah?”
He helps me lean forward, making my stomach lurch, and I feel warm hands moving up my shirt.
“Fuck!” Greg yells. “How the fuck did this happen? You’ve got welts all the way up your spine, Iz!”
I don’t answer, because really, what’s the point? I think it’s pretty obvious how I got like this.
I can hear the sirens approaching, making me snuggle closer to the safety Axel’s strong arms are providing. Just when I think I am finally free… What a joke that was. I’m beginning to think I won’t ever be free of Brandon’s reach.
Dee is directing the police officers and the paramedics into the living room. I can hear Greg off to the side somewhere talking in low tones with Maddox answering back. I can’t tell where anyone else is, and I’m in no hurry to open my eyes and check.
“Ma’am.” A new voice joins the group. “Ma’am can you open your eyes?” Axel shifts and moves me away from his warmth, placing my body in a way that allows this person to start touching my face. Immediately, I draw back into his body.
“Shhh, Izzy, let them look at you.” His warm breath tickles my ear and his arm tightens around my shoulders, reminding me that he is here and I’m safe. His head turns from my ear and he addresses the new voice. “I don’t think she can open her eyes without pain. She tried a second after I reached her but they snapped shut quickly. Hasn’t opened since. Her breathing sounds raspy and her voice seemed hoarse when she was able to talk. Hasn’t spoken since. Her back has what looks like a welt-like bruise from tailbone to shoulder blades. I haven’t been able to take a good look at it. Neck injury, and the source of the blood is from the back of her head. Again, I haven’t taken a good look.” He must be speaking to the paramedic, because when he finishes, I feel soft gloved hands start pressing into my face, around my neck, and up my throat.
“Ma’am, I need to lean you forward a bit so that I can look over your back and head slowly, and let me know if you feel like you’re—” He doesn’t get a chance to finish before I empty the contents of my stomach all over the floor.
“Okay, that’s okay. Do you feel nauseated?”
“Y-yes,” I answer back, again not recognizing my own voice. I sound like I’ve spent the last few hours screaming.
“Did you hit your head?”
“No…yes,” I whisper my reply, “I don’t remember. I was pushed into the doorframe before he grabbed my neck. I don’t remember much after that.”
“That’s okay. Let’s check you out right now, okay?”
His soft hands spend a few minutes taking my blood pressure before they continue to press and poke around my tender skin, earning a few hisses of pain from me and growls from Axel. They have me lean forward again, moving my hair around to check out the source of the bleeding, and then he checks my back. I can feel the torn skin on my back stretching and pulling tight with every small movement of my body.
“Sir, I can’t be sure without taking her to the hospital, but I’m willing to bet on a concussion. The head wound definitely needs stitches. Her back is troubling, but again, I can’t guarantee the damage done is only on the surface. That isn’t even counting her facial injuries. I would strongly advise a trip to the hospital.”
“That’s fine, but I’ll be driving her. I’m not letting her out of my sight.”
Even I can tell by his tone that there will be no bending on this. The poor guy trying to do his job attempts to explain to him that I would be completely safe riding in the ambulance but there is no use. Axel and all his stubbornness have spoken and there will only be one way for me to get to the hospital tonight.
Begrudgingly, he stops his protest and asks Axel to sign off that no further treatment by the paramedics is preferred. He gets my head cleaned and applies some gauze to my back, telling Axel that he needs to keep pressure on my head until I get to the hospital. I get a few ice packs and hold one to my right eye and the other to my sore neck. After he has done all he can, the paramedics take their leave.
I start nodding off shortly after, listening to the voices around me explain the events leading up to my crying out from the porch. I attempt to answer the questions the officers have for me but my drowsy and confused mind keeps pulling me under. Axel rouses me a few times and I am able to tell them who attacked me, but after falling asleep again, I faintly hear Axel tell them to meet us at the hospital with any further questions. Despite his calm and strong tone, I can hear a small tremor of fear.
He adjusts me in his arms and begins to stand. I don’t hear much after he tells telling someone to get the truck and drive him to the hospital. I let the safety of his strong arms and the comforting scent that only comes with Axel carry me off to the numbing blackness.
I wake up to the annoying sound of beeping and the nauseating smell of antiseptic and cleaner. Death—I’ve always thought the hospital smelled like death. It’s a smell you never forget and one I have always hated.
I try to open my eyes but they don’t obey my commands. I try to open my mouth and demand answers but nothing comes out. It’s like my body has decided to play dead.
“The doctor says there are no internal injuries other than some bruising and a lot of old broken bones badly reset. Home job the best he can tell. I looked at the scans, Reid. It looked like she has had every rib in her body broken at one point. I would gladly kill that motherfucker if I got my hands on him.” Coop. I’ve never heard him sound so pissed. He’s usually the fun-loving one of the group. “Took ten stitches to close up her head, nothing too bad and should be fine. Her neck is swollen. Fucker must have had one hell of a firm grip on her. The biggest concern at this point is her concussion and assessing her vision after she wakes up.”
The warm hand holding mine flexes and tightens a few times during my grocery list of injuries review. Even with my eyes closed and my mind hazy, I can feel the energy in the room grow heavy. It feels alive, making the hairs on my arms and neck stand on end.
“He’s fucking dead, you hear me? I’ll kill that sick fuck myself.” Axel releases my hand and I feel it return, pushing the hair back behind my ear. “It guts me to know she lived like this for so many years. Knowing this wasn’t even close to the worst…slices me fucking deep.”
“I know, Reid.”
“Where’s Dee, Greg? Both—either. I don’t care.” He must have his head turned because it’s hard to make out his question. I’m shocked that Dee isn’t already by my side.
“Beck made her go get something to eat, said she wouldn’t stop pacing and was shaking something crazy. Last I saw Greg, he was about to pop some hemorrhoids he was holding it in so tight. You sure there isn’t more there? They seem pretty tight.”
“Just friends,” he says. “Doesn’t matter. He isn’t touching her.”
His hand returns to mine and he brings his lips down for one small kiss to my hand. So tender and unlike the Axel I’ve been dealing with for the last month.
“I feel you. I’m going to step out and see what Locke found.”
A few minutes pass. He has his forehead resting on my hip, his lips resting on our joined hands. I can feel his mouth moving, warm breath caressing my skin, but I can’t make out his whispered words.
“Izzy, please wake up. Please, please, Princess.” I don’t know what shocks me more, his gentle pleading or the single warm tear that hits my hand.
I don’t know how long we pass time just like that. A few of the others come
and go asking Axel some questions, asking if he wants to leave and take a break. The cops come to see if I’ve woken up yet. Nurses come and check my IV bags and vitals. All the while, I am struggling to make my body listen, to wake up.
Dee is back in the room, and I think Beck and Greg are too. To my horror, they are discussing the abuse I lived. I can hear Dee explaining to Axel what happened that night she came to save me, telling him how long I was forced to stay in the hospital to heal and how much worse the injuries were then.
“Jesus fucking Christ,” I hear Axel say when she tells him how many broken bones I had then. He starts to speak but stops short when I finally force a whisper past my lips.
“Dee…”
“Oh God,” she cries out before rushing over to my side. I crack open my left eye and take in her face. She’s a mess, mascara running down her cheeks, her eyes red rimmed and swollen. With just the sound of my voice, she is a blubbering fool. “Oh, Iz…I was so scared!”
“Okay, I’m…okay.”
I look around the room and notice that it isn’t just Dee, Beck, and Greg Axel was speaking to. Maddox and Coop are standing off to the side, faces set in stone. When I meet Axel’s eyes, they are bright and full of compassion.
“Hey, Princess.” That’s all it takes for me to join Dee in a fit of hysterical crying.
The nurses come in shortly after and start checking all the machines, poking around my body, changing the dressing on my head, and applying some ointment to my right eye. A doctor who looks like he is well past time for retirement comes in next and attempts to clear the room to discuss my injuries, but Axel puts his foot down again and refuses to budge. The fight would be futile, so I just shake my head and wait for the doctor to go over everything.
“Ms. West,” he begins, looking over at Axel with worry. He must assume that he is the reason for my injuries. “How are you feeling?”
Even though I know it’s going to hurt like a bitch, I can’t hold back the laugh that bubbles up.
“Like I was hit by a truck, thrown a few feet, then run over by a bus.”
“Well. This is no joking matter, Ms. West. I understand that you had an altercation late yesterday evening?” Did he just say yesterday?
“Um…yes. Yes, sir. My ex-husband.”
“Right. I’m going to let you go home later this afternoon. I was assured by your roommate, Ms. Roberts, that you will be monitored and she will return you to the emergency room with any signs of concern. She has the list of what to watch out for. You need to keep your head dry for the next forty-eight hours. After washing your hair, dry as best as you can. Your back needs ointment applied every six hours. Keep the open wounds covered and watch for signs of infection. I’ve given her all the prescriptions for your home care. Antibiotics, as well as some pain medication. Do you have any questions?” Obviously Grandpa doesn’t specialize in bedside cheer.
“No, sir.”
“Ms. Roberts has already signed all of your discharge paperwork. Try to be more careful in the future, Ms. West.” That earns a low growl from Axel. I squeeze his hand to make sure he keeps his mouth shut.
Five hours later, I am being wheeled out to the entrance and loaded up into Axel’s monster truck. Dee has already left with Beck and Greg to go get my medication filled. Maddox and Coop climb into the back and we head off, away from the disgusting smell of death.
A few minutes down the road, I realize we aren’t headed in the right direction of my house. “Axel, where are you going?” I roll my head to the side with the help of the backrest and look over at him with my one good eye.
“My house,” he replies as calm as can be.
“I don’t want to fight with you, Ax. Please take me home. Dee can take care of me just fine.”
“Not taking you back there, Princess. Not until I know that fucker is no threat.”
“Take me home, Ax. Please. Just take me home.” Tears start to prickle against my lids. If I had the energy, I would probably be throwing my attitude all over the cab of his truck.
“No.” That’s all I get in return.
“Axel. Take me home. Now.”
“Izzy, get me now, that motherfucker walked up to your door. Walked right up. There were three trucks in the driveway, not to mention Maddox’s bike right up against the walkway. He walked right up to your door like there wasn’t a problem in his life, attacked you right under our noses.” He is gripping the steering wheel so tight I start to worry he might snap it right off. “I will not send you back into a house that he has no fear of strolling right up to and risk him put his hands on you again. No, not fucking happening.” He looks over at me and his eyes are blazing, his nostrils are flaring, and I can see the blood pounding through his veins. He looks like a rabid beast. “Never again will I allow you to be harmed when I can do something about it, so pitch your fit another time.”
“Please…”
That earns me another harsh snap of his neck and death glare. “NO!” he booms.
I sigh deeply. “Maddox?”
“Yeah, girl?” His grumbled response comes from behind me.
“Take me with you, please?”
He pauses for a second and I can feel the vibes coming off Axel go from pissed to nuclear. “Yeah, girl.”
“Thanks, Mad.”
“Fuck!” Axel bites out, slamming his fist against the wheel. “We will have words later, Locke.”
Other than Coop’s soft laughter, the rest of the ride back to Axel’s is passed in tense silence.
Chapter 13
I’ve been at Maddox’s apartment for two days now. When we first got here, he set me up in the guest room and spent the night watching stupid reality TV with me. He helps me keep my wounds clean and dressed and makes sure I take my medication when needed. Surprisingly, he is a great nurse. What I hadn’t expected was the late-night screaming waking me up from his room. I know he has demons, but I didn’t realize they were this bad. It was almost like we have an unspoken pact not to speak of his late-night terror.
Axel has been a daily guest as well. He isn’t happy about losing control of the situation, but I’m not sure I can handle being in his space for so long. Coop and Beck left to drive back to Bakersville and check on Brandon’s whereabouts. We get a call early this morning from the detectives on my case; Brandon has an alibi. His girlfriend says that he spent the weekend at her house, in her bed. There isn’t much more they can do since he has a witness backing up his story. I have to admit, at this point, I don’t feel safe going back home but I know my welcome is becoming an issue with Maddox. It isn’t that he doesn’t want me here but that he fears my being here.
I can’t understand his fear. He lives in a secure apartment complex, doorman at the entrance and a security system that would put the pentagon to shame. His house is probably the safest place for me to be. No, his fear seems to be related to whatever demons plague him at night. Demons he doesn’t want anyone to know about.
We sit down for dinner on night two when I decide to ask him.
“Hey, Mad? Can I ask you something?” I ask him hesitantly.
“Yeah, girl. You can ask but that doesn’t mean I’m going to answer.” He looks over, and despite his teasing, I can see the wariness behind his eyes.
“I know, I just… I just want you to know I’m here if you want to talk. I hear you, you know? I know what it’s like to have your nightmares chase you out of your dreams. I guess I just wanted to know if you wanted to talk about it?” I keep my eyes level with him, wanting him to know that, even with my problems, I can take on his issues. I want to help; I want to be there for my friend.
“Nothing for you to worry about, girl. Things better left alone, yeah?”
“All right, Mad. But if you want to talk, I’m here.” I pick up my fork and return to my salad.
“Izzy?” he asks. He startles me, not because I can hear the question coming, but because I don’t think I have ever heard him call me my name.
“Maddox?” I tease.
<
br /> “What happened between you and Reid?” He looks at me with concern written all over his face. Sympathy for my situation and compassion for me and my pain.
I don’t know what makes me open my mouth, but I know that whatever demons are chasing me, his are worse. For once, I don’t feel the stabbing pain that normally comes with thinking about the old Axel and Izzy. For the first time, I want to talk to someone, want to have someone else understand why I am firm on keeping him at arm’s length.
“All right,” I start, placing my fork back on the table and pushing back in my chair, “how long have you known Axel?”
“Close to ten years. I know about you. He used to talk. I just don’t understand how you are the same girl he always talked about. I can’t seem to understand his anger and your heartbreak.”
“Ten years, huh? So not long after he joined. Did you know I was supposed to be by his side ten years ago? We had it all planned out, like stupid kids. We thought that nothing would ever get in the way of our stupid plans. I was seventeen when he left for basic, still had one more year of school left, but he was coming back. I had this tiny speck of a diamond promise ring from him, so tiny you couldn’t even really see it was there…but that ring was worth more to me than all the riches in the world. He left for basic and was coming back for a visit a few months later. The plan was for me to make it to graduation. Then we would have a small wedding and I would join him wherever the Marines took him. He broke those plans. Broke them and never looked back.” I stop picking at the table and look up to meet Maddox’s blank stare.
“He broke them?” he calmly asks.
“Yeah. Never came back to me.” I can feel the emotion start choking me, but I am determined not to go there.
“Izzy, you’re sure? He never came back home?” He seems so confused by this.
“I don’t know if he ever came back home,” I start, earning another confused frown from Maddox. “Two weeks after he left, my parents were killed—drunk driver. Still being a minor and with no other local family, I was sent to my grandparents’ in North Carolina.”
