by Carnal, MJ
She takes the helmet off and shakes her head, trying to give some semblance of order to her long wavy auburn hair. It looks like she just crawled out of bed after a session of good loving.
She makes me want to blow off this rehearsal and drag her to the nearest private spot I can find and bury myself in her. I tell myself I’m not rushing. We have all the time in the world, so instead I take her hand and we go into the blessed coolness of the air conditioned arena.
I’d forgotten how intense the Louisiana heat and humidity can be, even in September.
We make our way to the dressing room designated for Bayou Stix. I entwine her fingers with mine as we walk down the hallway to stake some kind of claim, since every man is staring at her as if she’s a cool drink of water in the middle of the desert.
It makes me feel good that she’s with me and they’re looking, but at the same time, I don’t want anyone to look. I just got her back; I want to place her in a bubble away from curious and leering eyes.
Just outside the dressing room door I pull her to a stop, and as she looks at me expectantly. I press her back against the door, wrap her hair around my hands, and hold her face still for me as I claim her mouth. This kiss is not as gentle as the one we shared in the kitchen of Java and Sweeties, but then again, it’s not meant to be. It’s not rough either. It’s a kiss of passion and possession. A kiss to show everyone that while they may be able to look, they cannot touch. This woman is mine.
Once I’ve thoroughly claimed her mouth and have her breathless and looking well-loved, I break the kiss; though I’m a bit short of breath too, and push open the door.
The other members of the band look up at the intrusion and notice I brought company. They all share looks of shock as they glance at each other and from me to Lexi. I smile. “Lex, you remember the guys, right? Jessie, Dade, Liam, and Cruz. Guys, you remember Lexi?”
Their mouths pop closed and their features return to normal. Jessie and Dade jump up and come over to us with big smiles and reach for Lexi. Liam nods at her before leaning back on the wall, looking disinterested. Cruz smiles shyly at us.
Jessie and Dade take turns giving her hugs and both talk at once.
“Heya, Lexi. How are you beautiful? You were always a beauty, but man time has certainly been kind to you! Turn around. Let me get the full effect!” Jessie states as he twirls his finger in a circle and checks her out, looking her up and down.
“Hey, beautiful! Give me a hug. Good to see you again. Time has been oh so kind to you. You’re ravishing.” Dade picks Lexi up and swings her around as he kisses her cheek.
“Hey, Lexi. It’s good to see you again. This is an unexpected, but nice surprise. Glad to see you back with Jude,” Cruz murmurs quietly from the couch. Behind his drums, on stage, in his element, he’s a god, but around people, he’s shy and timid.
Lexi giggles and hugs them back, taking an extra second to smile at Cruz. Jessie grabs her again and pulls her in for another hug. Reaching for her waist, I pull her from Jessie, and tuck her against my side.
“Jessie, if you want to be able to play the bass tomorrow night, you’ll kindly keep your hands off of my woman,” I growl.
At that statement, five pairs of eyebrows raise and all turn towards me. Jessie grins and throws his hands up while Dade belts out a laugh; Liam drops his chin and smirks, and Cruz just smiles at me.
I look at Lexi and she’s staring at me as if she doesn’t know what she just heard. Her eyebrows are still raised and her mouth is slightly open.
I can’t help it; I lean in and swipe my tongue into her mouth, before giving her a hard kiss on those moist red lips. I don’t know where that came from. The guys would never make a move on Lexi, but I had to let them know I’m serious about her.
My cards are on the table.
“You assholes ready to rock? Let’s go. Lex, you can hang here or follow us out. You can really do whatever you want to do, but the best view is from the side stage, and I’d like for you to watch us warm up and rehearse.”
She just stands there, so I take her hands and motion the guys out of the room. “You ok?” She nods her head yes. “Are you coming with me?”
“Yes, Jude. I’m coming with you,” she replies softly.
We walk towards the stage hand in hand.
Chapter Ten
Lexi
His woman. Jude just basically beat his chest and claimed me. He called me his woman.
This is nuts. Yesterday, I was just me, just Lexi. I was successful and single. I had Erik, Bradi, Micah, and work. Jude pops up and I thought we hated each other. Last night was, well it was horrid, but today… OMG today! Am I hallucinating? Maybe I’m still asleep and this isn’t really happening. Maybe this is a dream. If this isn’t real, please God don’t let me wake up.
Jude just claimed me as his woman. It’s almost like we never parted…
I stand at the right side of the stage with a couple of roadies and sound technicians as another roadie runs to find me the chair Jude demanded he get for me. I watch as the guys pick up their instruments and start to warm up.
I can’t take my eyes off of Jude. This is his element. He grabs the microphone stand and moves his head from side to side to stretch his neck, before dropping down into a few squats to limber up his legs. This causes his jeans to tighten over his strong thighs and his perfect ass. I can’t move my eyes.
It’s as if my eyes are a laser and his ass is the target. He looks over his shoulder and catches me staring. He winks and jumps up on his toes a few times.
Jessie calls out, “Hey we doing the normal warm up?” with his brows raised in question.
Jude looks at me and calls back, “Yes. Stick with it. Best range coverage that way, so yeah, usual warm-up.” Our eyes are still locked, and as the first strains of Jessie’s bass float out, Jude starts to sing. His body is facing the empty arena, but his head is facing me and his eyes are interlocked with mine.
My brain suddenly wraps around the song choice.
This is the usual warm up song? He’s still looking at me as the first verse of My Heart Was Red streams through the empty arena strong and clear.
This is my song… This is the first song Jude ever wrote for me. His gravelly voice reaches straight into my heart and reclaims its ownership.
My knees go weak and I feel lightheaded. Just then, the roadie returns with a chair and I gratefully sink into it. As my rear touches the seat, Jude smiles and turns to face the sound tech on the floor as he continues to sing.
I lay my head back and close my eyes, just taking his voice in.
"I walked alone; all alone,
always alone, like I was made of stone
even in a crowd I was always alone
alive but not living
until the day broke and my heart was red."
Hearing the chorus brings me back to the first time he sang it for me…
<><><>
Lexi
9 years ago
It’s hot tonight. It’s 11:30 and it’s still at least 85 degrees out here.
It’s August in Louisiana, so the temperature is not unusual. But the humidity is making it feel like it’s the middle of the day.
A bunch of us are at a bonfire behind the levee trying to get in a few more carefree days before school starts in a couple of weeks. We’re a mix of those still attending high school and those who recently graduated, but haven’t started college yet. We’re on the river, but there’s no breeze.
It’s really too hot for a fire, but without it, it would be too dark to see. There are no lights out here. It’s just the levee, the river, the trees, and an occasional barge passing by.
Someone has their truck door open and the radio on, so we have music. People are spread out everywhere on tailgates, blankets, fallen trees, or just in the grass or sand.
Most people are drinking. Wine coolers, beer, and Boone’s cheap wine are the most popular choices.
I’ve had two wine coolers and a glass of Boone�
�s Strawberry Hill, add that to the oppressive heat, and I’m pretty buzzed.
The temperature is really getting to everyone, so people start to clear out around midnight and by 12:30; the only people left are Erik, Jude, and me.
Jude has been playing his guitar and singing all night. A few girls have tried to talk to him, but he’s been in a strange mood the past month or so, and he didn’t take anyone up on their offers to keep him company. This pleases me.
In two weeks, I’ll be a Senior. Hunter was accepted to UCLA, and has already moved to California to get settled before the semester starts. We both agreed that the long distance thing wasn’t in the cards for us, so we ended on good terms back in June.
Erik is going into business management at LSU. Jude has decided that college is not for him and he wants to focus on his music. So he’s recorded a few demos and has sent them off to various music producers.
He’s good. No, he’s great. His voice is both gravelly and smooth like butter at the same time. It’s amazing. He’s amazing.
Erik is tired and asks me if I’m ready to go since I rode here with him, but I’m buzzed and not ready to go home yet. I say I’ll stay as long as Jude can bring me home.
Jude looks over at me with hooded eyes, then at Erik, shrugs and says he’ll bring me home. He doesn’t mind.
Erik packs up, kisses my head, and fist bumps Jude before heading to his car and saying he’ll catch up with us tomorrow and to be safe.
Jude and I don’t talk. But we’re so used to each other, we don’t really need to. He’s sitting on the blanket with his back against a River Birch tree. I lie back on the blanket near his legs and stare at the stars, while I listen to him play.
After about 15 minutes of playing, Jude also starts to sing. I’ve never heard this song before, but it’s beautiful. My eyes drift shut as his voice soothes me. When the chorus comes around for the second time, I suddenly have a revelation… this song sounds like it’s about me…
Is this song about me?
I listen to Jude’s hypnotic voice and open my eyes again. The final chords fade… he’s staring at me.
Our eyes remain locked for a while, neither looking away. Both of us are barely breathing. The air suddenly feels charged. Jude audibly swallows.
I sit up some, leaning on my elbows. “Jude?” I begin uncertainly. I try again. “Jude, can I ask you something?” My lips barely move, but he hears me.
He looks from my eyes to my lips and back again before answering. “You can ask me anything, Lex.”
“What’s the name of that song?”
“It’s called My Heart Was Red.”
I sit up a little more, which makes my breasts rise up. His eyes follow the movement and I can see he’s gritting his teeth. “Jude? Is that song about me? Did you write that song for me?”
I hold my breath as I wait for his answer. I’m terrified now that I’ve put myself out there. I’m terrified he’ll say no… that I’m imagining things… projecting what I want to be instead of what truly is. But I’m also terrified he’ll say yes. Because if he says yes, everything will change…
Jude looks into my eyes with those mesmerizing hazel eyes of his. He stares at me so hard and long, I think he’s not going to answer. Then, just as my heart is breaking and I’m closing my eyes to hide my pain and mortification from him, he answers in a whisper, “Yes Lex. The song is about you. It’s always about you.”
My eyes snap open, but I’m frozen in place. We stare at each other. Neither moving, just taking each other in. Everything he feels is suddenly visible in his eyes as he looks at me. I know my eyes mirror his.
We reach for each other at the same time. I push his guitar down and climb into his lap as he pulls me up and over him.
We remain this way for a long time, me on his lap with my legs straddling his. His hands are on my hips, holding me in place as our faces are aligned and we stare into each other’s eyes and breathe each other in with our mouths centimeters apart.
Finally, thank you God, finally, Jude lowers his head and kisses me. It’s a gentle, exploratory kiss. At first he barely brushes his soft lips against mine. He kisses one corner of my mouth and then the other before returning to my lips.
We kiss sweetly for a while. Just a gentle brushing of lips with him pressing light kisses all over my face. He kisses my mouth, my eyes, my nose, and my forehead, before he returns and softly caresses my lips again.
I love the way he’s kissing me, cherishing me, but dammit… I want more! I squeeze his hips with my thighs and stand on my knees, better aligning our mouths and open my mouth, sweeping my tongue against the seam of his lips. He opens his mouth to grant me access. I immediately run my tongue over and around his making sure to explore every surface of his mouth before gently sucking on his tongue.
He groans as I suck on his tongue and he grips my hips tightly, his hands massaging the curve at the top of my ass. He’s trying to hold me still, but I can feel his cock hard beneath me, right at my center, so I rub myself against him.
With a growl, he flips me over and lays me back, covering my body with his. He spreads my thighs with his hips and presses his rigid cock right against my wet core. He starts to move, never breaking our kiss.
Taking my leg and lifting it over his hip, he trails his hand up my thigh. It meets the bottom of my shorts and he squeezes my thigh before trailing his fingertip whisper soft to the edge of my bikini bottoms.
Our mouths are fused and we’re both moaning and gasping. My hands pull his shirt up, my nails dragging up his back, and he breaks our kiss long enough to remove his hand, so he can rip the shirt over his head and fling it away.
I run both hands up his body. From his cut abs to his firm pecs, I can’t get enough. He has tattoos on both shoulders and a large tattoo across the top of his chest. I absorb every detail as I trace them with my hands and mouth.
He jerks me up to a slightly raised position, and grabs the hem of my shirt before pulling it over my head. He throws it. Where it lands, I have no idea. Nor do I care as he lays back on me and fuses his mouth back to mine while his naked chest is pressed against my skin. The only thing between our chests is my bikini top.
My hands are in his hair, my fingers grabbing the blond strands with his signature purple tips tightly. It’s so soft. I move my head back and break our kiss so I can breathe.
He trails his lips down my chin and neck, gently licking my sweat, and nipping as he goes. His mouth gets to my breasts, covered in my bikini top. My nipples are standing tall and proud, clearly visible through the thin material. Each ragged breath I take brings my aching breasts closer to his mouth.
He mutters, “Lex, dear God, Lexi. You’re killing me.” And takes my nipple into his mouth through my top.
I scream his name and arch my back, wanting more. My hands move to my bikini ties and start to undo the ones on my neck, but his hands are there first and he does it himself. He unties the top strings and instead of undoing the bottom, as if he simply cannot wait, he just pulls it down. My breasts are exposed to Jude and the night sky and he closes his mouth over the right nipple and gently rolls and pinches the left. He’s licking, biting, and sucking my breasts, making sure to pay special attention to both.
I’m in heaven; I’m rolling, squirming and moaning over and over. I’m so close to an orgasm and he hasn’t even touched my pussy yet.
I want more. So much more. I want him. I want to touch him and taste him. I want to drive him as wild with need as he’s driving me.
My hands leave his chest and go for the snap on his cargo shorts. He’s so big, my amber eyes widen. The tip of his hard cock is almost popping out of the top of his shorts!
I have to taste it.
Jude leaves my breasts and starts kissing down my stomach. My stomach starts rippling as he dips his tongue into my navel and swirls it around.
I forget his shorts and throw my head back. “Yes Jude. God yes. Please. Oh please don’t stop.”
He doesn’t s
top.
He continues to kiss and bite my stomach as his hands pull my shorts and bikini bottoms down and off.
Only when I’m completely bared does he look up from above my mound. My thighs are spread wide, my pussy is glistening, and my entire body is shaking. I’m so turned on.
Jude looks deep into my eyes and blows across my pussy. I gasp and feel it contract. Still looking into my eyes, he licks me from bottom to top, stopping at my clit as he laps it a few times. It’s so tight. It’s throbbing. I need release. I need Jude.
He lifts his head and I groan, but he only looks deeper into my eyes as he grates out, “If we do this Lex. If this happens… if we do this… You. Are. Mine. Do you understand?” He licks again, this time inserting his tongue inside of me. “Do you want this? Do you want me? I mean really want ME?”
I lift my head up and say as clearly as I can through my sensual haze, “I understand. Completely. And yes I want this. I want you. I’ve always wanted you!”
This I know with 100% certainty.
His eyes light up and he dives in. He’s flicking my clit over and over with his tongue, and as he gently bites it, he inserts a finger into my pussy and slowly starts moving it in and out. As my moans become louder and my hips start thrashing, he moves his fingers faster and faster.
He can tell I’m close. “Come for me, baby. Come for me, Lex. Show me you want me.”
Those words send me over the edge. I scream out with my orgasm, bucking off the blanket. “Jude, Oh Jude. J…U…D…E! YES!!” He licks me gently until I stop thrashing.
I collapse back against the blanket, completely spent, but so happy. He lays down beside me, pulling me into his arms, and kisses me gently on the mouth. I can taste myself on his lips. His hand settles on my belly as he feels the aftershocks of the best orgasm of my life subside.
After a minute, the feel of his hand tracing gentle circles on my stomach, brings my desire back to the forefront. I sit up and roll over him. He looks at me surprised. I give him a mischievous smile and lick his stomach.
