A Cousin's Promise

by Wanda E. Brunstetter

  He slapped the side of his head. I’ve gotta quit thinking about this or I won’t be able to concentrate on the job at hand.

  He set right to work on cleaning the horse’s hoof and had just picked up the nippers to trim it, when the horse backed up and stepped right on his foot. Despite the fact that Jake wore boots, it hurt like crazy.

  “Yeow!” Jake dropped the nippers and crumpled to the ground as searing pain shot from the top of his foot all the way up his leg.

  He tried to stand, but the pain was so intense he just couldn’t. Since his folks were in the house, and he was clear on the other side of the barn, he figured there’d be no point in hollering for help. Besides, Dad was sick in bed, and Mom sure couldn’t carry him up to the house by herself.

  There’s only one thing I can do, he decided. I’ll have to stay on the grass and roll my way back to the house. I just hope I can get there before I pass out from the pain.

  By the time Jake made it up to the house, he was so exhausted he had to drag himself onto the porch.

  Bam! Bam! Bam! Unable to stand, he reached up and pounded on the door with his fists.

  Finally, the door swung open. “Jake! Why are you lying on the porch like that?” Mom asked.

  “Stupid horse stepped on me when I was trying to clean his hooves.” Jake moaned. “My foot hurts so bad I had to roll my way up to the house.”

  “Ach! Let’s get you inside so I can take a look at your foot. It might be broken.”

  Jake shook his head as he gritted his teeth. “I think it’s just a bad bruise.”

  “You’re gonna have to help me now,” Mom said, bending down and slipping her hands under Jake’s arms.

  Using every ounce of strength he could muster, Jake grabbed the edge of the chair near the door and pulled himself up. Then, using Mom as a support, he hopped into the house on one foot.

  “Take a seat at the table,” Mom instructed. “I’ll get your boot off and see what I think.”

  Jake did as she asked and groaned when she tugged on the boot. “Not so hard, Mom! It hurts so bad I feel like I might pass out.”

  “Put your head between your knees,” she instructed. “And take in a couple of deep breaths.”

  Jake complied, then winced when she pulled off the boot.

  “It’s already swollen,” Mom said after she’d removed Jake’s sock. “I think you need to go the hospital and have it x-rayed.”

  “It’ll be fine,” Jake argued. “I just need to put some ice on it and rest awhile.”

  Mom shook her head. “Resting it isn’t good enough, son. You need to have it looked at.”

  Jake leaned over and stared at his purple, swollen foot. “I’m lookin’ at it now, and I say it’s not broken.”

  Mom gave him a light tap on the arm. “No funning around. If it’s broken, it will need to be set and put in a cast.”

  Jake sighed. “Okay, okay. If it’s not feeling better by the time Charlie gets here, I’ll ask him to give me a ride to the hospital in Goshen.”

  CHAPTER 19

  Loraine smiled when she saw Crist Lambright pushing Wayne’s wheelchair across the grass. It was good to see Wayne attending church again. He needed to be in fellowship with his friends.

  She was tempted to rush over but held herself in check, not wishing to appear overanxious or pushy. When Wayne looked her way and made eye contact, she offered him a smile and a friendly wave.

  He lifted one hand and gave a quick nod. Then, grasping the wheels on his chair, he pushed himself up the path leading to the Lehmans’ barn where several other men had gone.

  Loraine headed for a group of women standing near the front porch but had only taken a few steps when she spotted Jake hobbling across the lawn.

  “What happened to you?” she asked.

  “I was getting ready to shoe a horse the other day, and the stupid critter stepped on my foot.”

  “That must have hurt.”

  “It sure did. It hurt so bad I couldn’t even stand up or put any weight on my foot. I ended up having to roll my way to the house.” He chuckled and gave his chin dimple a couple of taps. “Had to stop every few rolls in order to rest up for the rest of the trip.”

  Loraine could almost picture Jake lying on the ground, rolling across the grass. It brought a smile to her lips, even though she knew he must have been in a lot of pain.

  “The whole episode is kind of funny now,” Jake said, “but at the time, it sure wasn’t. Thought for a while it was broken, but it turned out to only be a bad bruise.”

  “How do you know? Did you have it looked at right away?”

  “Sure did. I looked at it every chance I got,” Jake said with a wink.

  She poked his arm. “You’re such a tease. Seriously, did you have it x-rayed?”

  “Jah, Charlie, my driver, was scheduled to give me a ride to shoe several horses. When he got to our house and took one look at my big foot, he said, ‘Jake Beechy, you’re going to the hospital to get that x-rayed, whether you like it or not!’”

  Jake thumped his chin a couple of times. “I had it x-rayed and checked over real good, but the doctor said it was just a bad bruise and that a couple of blood vessels had busted.” He tipped his head and gave Loraine a crooked grin. “Don’t think I would have liked being laid up in a cast. It would’ve slowed me down too much.”

  Loraine’s thoughts went to Wayne. I can only imagine how he must feel being confined to a wheelchair. I’m sure he’d give just about anything to be in Jake’s place right now.

  Jake nudged Loraine’s arm and pointed to the Lehmans’ house. “Guess you’d better go; your cousin’s calling you.”

  Loraine turned her gaze in that direction and saw Ella on the porch, motioning for her to come.

  “You’re right; Ella does seem to want me. See you later, Jake.”

  ***

  As Jake limped into the barn, he thought about Loraine and how pleasant she’d been to him. It seemed like each time they were together the barrier came down a little more. Maybe she was beginning to trust him again. Maybe he had reason to hope that they might get back together. He thought about asking her out right now but knew it wouldn’t be the proper time. Oh, how pretty she looked this morning. It was enough to take a man’s breath away.

  “How come you’re limping?” Wayne asked when Jake entered the barn and found him sitting off by himself.

  Jake quickly related the story of how the horse had stepped on his foot and ended it by saying, “I’m just glad there was nothing broken. I can’t afford to be laid up right now.”

  Wayne winced as though in pain, and Jake could have kicked himself. He didn’t know what he’d do if he were in Wayne’s place.

  “So how are you doing?” Jake asked. “Are things going any better for you?”

  Wayne shrugged. “My doctor talked me into getting a prosthesis, but now I’m having second thoughts.”

  “How come?” Jake asked as he lowered himself to a bale of hay. “I’ve already gone through so much physical therapy and pain, and I’m not sure I want to go through any more.”

  “Guess I can understand that,” Jake said. “As much as my foot hurts, I can’t even imagine what all you’ve been through.”

  Wayne motioned to the men who’d begun heading into the buggy shed where their church service would be held. “Looks like church is about to begin, so I guess we’d better get in there.”

  Jake nodded and followed Wayne out of the barn.

  ***

  Ella grabbed Loraine’s arm and pulled her close to her side. “What were you doing with Jake over there?”

  “Don’t look so worried; we were just talking.”

  “Humph!” Ella crossed her arms. “I thought you had better sense than to get involved with him again.”

  “We’re not involved. I was just asking why he was limping.”

  “And why is that?”

  “He got stepped on by a horse, but lucky for him, he only suffered a bad bruise.” Loraine’s e
yebrows drew together. “It could have been much worse. It could have been broken or mangled like Wayne’s sheep.”

  “What sheep is that?” Ella asked.

  Loraine was about to reply when Ella’s sister stepped between them and said, “Church is about to start. The men are heading for the buggy shed.”

  “Guess we’d better get in there, then.” Ella led the way and quickly found a seat on one of the backless wooden benches on the women’s side of the room.

  During the service, Ella had a hard time concentrating. It was hard not to watch Jake as he kept looking over at Loraine.

  Looks like I’d better have another talk with that fellow, she fumed. He seems determined to get Loraine back.

  Ella’s thoughts shifted gears when she noticed a little girl sitting on her mother’s lap, holding a blanket while sucking her thumb.

  A fly buzzed around the room, and some of the babies were getting fussy. A couple of the younger boys were bent over at the waist; it looked as though they might have fallen asleep.

  Then Ella noticed her mother lift a shaky hand as she wiped her forehead with a handkerchief. Had the words from the song they were singing struck a nerve?

  Ella glanced down at the Ausbund hymn book in her lap and figured the words from Song 76 had probably touched Mama’s heart. “Where shall I turn to, I the least of the brethren? Alone to God my Lord, Who will be my helper. In all my needs, I trust in you, O God! You will not forsake me; And will stand by me until death.”

  Ella hoped her mother had decided to give God all of her needs and to trust only in Him. Mama would always miss Raymond, but with God’s help, she could carry on.

  ***

  When church was over and everyone had eaten their common meal, Wayne decided to maneuver his wheelchair across the grass and find a spot near the pasture to look at the horses. It was nice to attend church service again, but ever since the accident, he’d had a difficult time socializing, so he preferred to be off by himself for a while.

  He closed his eyes and lifted his face to the sky. It might be a bit chilly, but at least the sun was out.

  “Are you sleeping?”

  Wayne’s eyes snapped open, and he turned at the sound of Loraine’s voice.

  “Uh ... no ... I was just sitting here, thinking.”

  She smiled. “I’m glad you felt up to coming to church today. You’ve been missed.” Her expression was so intense it made his stomach lurch with nervous anticipation. Every nerve in his body tingled.

  As Wayne turned back around, tension knotted his shoulders. He could almost feel her staring at him.

  “You seem so tense.” Loraine placed her hands on his taut shoulders. Fire flared up his arms as she made little circles along his shoulder blades. He feared if he didn’t move away soon he might die from longing to hold her. Loraine’s presence made Wayne feel like one of the old martyrs of Germany who had led the Amish to flee to America so many years ago.

  “I ... uh ... have decided to go ahead and get a prosthesis,” he mumbled, needing to get his mind on something else.

  “Oh, that’s good to hear.” She continued to lightly massage his shoulders.

  “I’ve got another doctor’s appointment later this week, but I’m not looking forward to going.”

  “Would you like me to go with you?” she asked.

  “That’s not a good idea! Besides, my folks will be going with me.”

  “Oh.” She stopped rubbing his shoulders and moved to stand near the fence. As she did so, an empty coldness swept over Wayne.

  The silence settled around them, broken only by the whinny of the horses in the corral. As much as Wayne’s heart cried out for Loraine to stay, he was anxious for her to leave him alone.

  “I saw you talking to Jake before church started.”

  She fiddled with the strings on her head covering. “There was nothing to it; Jake and I are only friends.”

  He shrugged. “Whatever you say.”

  “It’s true, Wayne. We—”

  “It doesn’t matter. You’re better off with Jake than you would be with me. Now if you don’t mind, I’d really like to be alone.”

  She blinked a couple of times, and then with a smile that appeared to be forced, she lifted her hand and bid him good-bye.

  A lump formed in Wayne’s throat as he watched her walk away. Even though he knew she’d be better off without him, it pained him to think of her being with Jake.

  With fingertips pressed against his lips, he closed his eyes and relived the first kiss he and Loraine had ever shared.

  CHAPTER 20

  Wayne stared out the window of their English driver’s van, watching the scenery go by and noting that many of the trees had dropped their leaves. It had been six weeks since he’d lost his leg, and this morning, he’d been given a new leg. The doctor had told him that the sooner he started to feel like the prosthesis was a part of him, the sooner he’d be able to adjust to the stride in his steps. He’d given Wayne instructions on how to attach the new leg, and then Wayne had been forced to take several agonizing steps between some parallel bars. He’d left the hospital with a pair of crutches, which he would use for support until he got used to walking with the new leg.

  As Wayne stepped out of the van a short time later, he wobbled and gritted his teeth. Walking with his new prosthesis was no easy task.

  “I’ll probably never adjust to the artificial leg,” he mumbled as Pop grabbed hold of his arm.

  “Sure you will,” Pop said. “Just give yourself some time.”

  “Would you prefer to ride up to the house in your wheelchair rather than trying to walk?” Mom asked.

  Wayne shook his head and gritted his teeth. “I’ve got to get used to walking with this, so I may as well begin now.”

  As soon as they entered the house, Mom pulled out a chair for Wayne. “You can sit here and rest while I get a pot of coffee going,” she said, motioning to the kitchen table.

  “I don’t want any coffee,” he mumbled.

  “You look tired. Why don’t you go to your room and rest awhile? I’ll call you when I get lunch on the table.”

  Irritation welled in Wayne’s soul. She was doing it again—smothering him. Truth was, he did feel pretty tired and was experiencing some pain. “Guess I’ll go to the living room,” he said. “I can rest on the sofa there.” He hobbled out of the room before Mom said anything more.

  ***

  “You need to quit smothering him,” Crist said after Wayne left the room.

  Ada pursed her lips and glared at him. “How many times are you going to tell me that?”

  “As many times as it takes.” Crist helped himself to a cup of coffee and took a seat at the table. “If our son’s ever going to adjust to his new leg, then he’ll need to learn to do things on his own, and he doesn’t need your suggestions.”

  Ada frowned. “I just wish—”

  “Don’t start with the wishing, now. All the wishing in the world won’t change a thing. That young lamb Wayne’s been taking care of for the last few weeks had to learn to adapt to its handicap, and Wayne’s trying to do the same.”

  “Have you talked to him any more about becoming a taxidermist?”

  He shook his head. “He knows the offer’s open. I don’t want to push him into something he’d rather not do.”

  “But he’s got to do something. I mean, he can’t spend the rest of his life taking care of a crippled sheep and feeling sorry for himself.”

  “I’m sure he won’t—as long as we allow him to make his own decisions. Remember, it’s his life, not ours, Ada.”

  Ada fiddled with the napkin beside her cup, finally crumpling it into a tight little ball. If she could have her way, she’d somehow make sure that Fern Bontrager was in Wayne’s future. But she knew that wasn’t possible, so she’d have to be happy taking care of Wayne for the rest of her life.

  ***

  “Have you decided yet whether you’re going to stay in Indiana and join the church?”
Jake’s mother asked him during their evening meal.

  Jake gave a noncommittal shrug and poked his fork into a thick slice of ham.

  “Your mamm asked you a question, and I think she deserves an answer,” Dad spoke up from his seat at the head of the table. “For that matter, I’d like to hear the answer to that question myself.”

  Jake chewed the piece of ham, then looked over at Mom. “I haven’t made up my mind yet what I’m gonna do. I just know I’m where I’m supposed to be right now.”

  “You’re right about that,” Dad said with a nod. “And if you want my opinion, you should never have left home in the first place.”

  Jake ground his teeth. Not another lecture from Dad. Since he’d returned to Indiana, he’d had too many of them already.

  “Jake’s only hanging around because he’s in love with Loraine,” Elmer spoke up. “If she gets back with Wayne, he’ll leave home again; you’ll see that I’m right about that.”

  Jake glared at his twelve-year-old brother. “You think you know everything, don’t you?”

  Elmer took a drink and set the glass down so hard that some of the milk spilled out. “Do not. I just know you, that’s all. When you set your sights on somethin’, you go right after it and don’t stop till you’ve got what you want.” He swiped his tongue over his lip. “And when you don’t get what you want, you run away.”

  Jake shook his head. “You don’t know what you’re talking about. When I went to Montana, it had nothing to do with me not getting something I wanted.”

  “Are you sure about that? As I recall, you wanted to quit shoeing horses and expected me to loan you the money to buy a herd of horses.” Dad leaned his elbows on the table and stared at Jake so hard it made his toes curl inside his boots. “When I said if you wanted to start your own business you’d have to save up the money and do it on your own, you headed for Montana to play cowboy with a bunch of English fellows.”