CHAPTER three
"You're up early," Kris said softly.
I turned around in time to see her pass through the doorway with the dog. After greeting Zoey with a vigorous ear-rub, she hit the porch deck running, her nails clicking on the weathered wood all the way down the stairs. Little flurries of dirt clouded around her legs as she disappeared in a rush behind the building to her favorite potty spot.
"I couldn't sleep much last night." I turned around and leaned my back against the deck railing.
"I know me neither." Kris looked tired and irritable.
"Sorry if I woke you."
"No, no, you didn't. I was already awake actually." She sat down on one of the colorful Adirondack chairs with a loud sigh.
"We're all having bad dreams, aren't we?" I grabbed at my loose hair and pulled it back into a messy knot so the slight breeze would stop blowing it into my face.
"Yeah. Sucks." Kris hugged her knees to her chest and stared out into the woods in front of our cabin.
"Hey," I approached her and put my hand on top of her head, rustling her dark hair until she playfully swatted my hand away, "…how about some pancakes? We still have chocolate chips, remember?"
"Deal!" She jumped up from her chair and I smiled as she rushed around me, back into the cabin.
Movement in the woods caught my attention and I turned in a half-circle, straining to see between the overgrown shrubs and trees that started on the other side of the small trail that linked the cabins together. My eyes settled on the trunk of a massive pine as I struggled to focus on the dark cloud behind it. My breathing stopped in my throat as the shape of a man began to form. I bristled as he stared out from the woods, looking at the cabins….looking at me. Everything stilled; the breeze stopped, the birds quieted, and all that could be heard was the thudding of my own heart.
But it couldn't be…could it? The tall and dark figure slowly lifted a hand and waved once at me as I took a step forward, peering harder into the darkness of the quiet forest until I was certain without a doubt that I was seeing him. Fin.
***
As soon as I recognized him, he was gone. The man behind the tree became a normal shadow again. As I spun around to flee into the cabin, I crashed face-first into Connor's bare chest.
"Hey! Where are you off to in such a hurry?" He dragged a hand through his sleep-messed hair but his goofy grin fell when he looked down at my face.
"Oh God…I saw…I saw…" I couldn't say Fin's name out loud. I had helped put his body into the ground just a few months before. It didn't make sense - seeing him hiding in the trees.
After glancing over my shoulder, the woods appeared just as they always did. Connor must have sensed my anxiety because he looked up and down the trail with concern. Eventually satisfied that we were in fact alone, he put his arm around my shoulders before guiding me back to the door. I noticed him staring off into the woods before we left the porch with his brow furrowed, but he said nothing. Neither of us did. Neither of us had to.
Though no one had mentioned it, we all knew we weren't alone at the lodge. It wasn't talked about but it was there - the strange sounds in the night...the shadows that lurked...the whispers and the screams. We all woke up from our nightmares only to find that monsters were hiding in the shadows, waiting for something…waiting for us. It made it nearly impossible for anyone to get a good night of sleep. It was starting to show on our faces, just as it showed on Connor's as he turned me away from the woods to follow me back into the cabin.
Kris had already covered the counter space with the ingredients for breakfast, including freshly cut orange slices sitting in a large bowl. The kitchen was quickly filling with the aroma of citrus, cinnamon and vanilla. We had recently raided a few backyards and small orchards for fresh food. Most of the citrus trees in the greenhouse were burned earlier in the year. We didn't speak of that day often; it was the day that Fin died. And Matt too, though no one actually missed him and his delinquent friends.
I tried to push thoughts of Fin out of my mind while I poured the batter Kris had mixed onto the grill. When it bubbled around the edges, I flipped the pancake and blinked at the heat that radiated off the stovetop. Lost in a daydream of the past, I ignored the playful banter between Connor and Kris from the nearby living room and didn't notice the sound of the golf-cart until it pulled to a stop in front of the cabin.
Kris's loud squeal of delight brought me crashing back to reality and I flipped a pancake off the grill moments before it began to burn. So, the happy couple had finally returned from their baby-shopping spree from the day before. While Connor and Kris met Jacks and Ana outside, I cut up a few more oranges and doubled the pancake mixture. Figured I might as well make breakfast a family affair.
***
Jacks sauntered into the cabin looking a bit tired but otherwise happy. He was going to be a dad after-all, but spending hours combing through the dead city streets of San Diego to hit up the right baby shops with his pregnant girlfriend in tow was not his ideal way to spend a beautiful cloud-free day in July. What Ana wanted though, she seemed to get. And get a lot they did.
After breakfast, Jacks convinced everyone to take turns unloading bags and boxes of baby clothes and nursery essentials from the bed of his truck while Ana shouted out commands. I was the only one exempt from this duty since Jacks frowned at my still fresh road-rash injuries and officially dubbed me a spectator. It had been a week already and I was more than able to help, but inwardly happy I got passed over so easily.
Rather than simply standing around staring at the others as they bustled around the full truck, I decided to follow Ana back to the cabin she shared next to mine with Jacks, to help unload the multitude of supplies she would soon find unnecessary. Five nursery lamps…really? Who needed that many lights in a baby's room? Or two boxes - BOXES of baby blankets. Ana was soon going to find out how much laundry a little person created, unless her plan was to throw out everything that got dirty. Knowing her prissy personality, I didn't doubt that as a possibility.
Watching her hobble up and down steps was my newfound guilty pleasure. Once she started showing she couldn't hide the pregnancy anymore. And I suspected it was because she was nervous about who the baby's father was. It wasn't my place to know, so I didn't ask. But I hoped that Jacks had. Not that it mattered much; he was sold on the idea of becoming a parent and if the math fit for him, so be it. She claimed to be somewhere around the end of her second trimester, which meant the ever-increasing swell of her stomach was becoming a daily spectator event, much to her displeasure.
Ana's usual tight-clothed, high-heeled fashion sense had been replaced with one that would rival any hippie's wardrobe. In fact, she dressed more like me…minus the jeans. She hated anything that was tight around her stomach or chest, which meant no more skinny jeans and push-up bras. Oh, the joys of pregnancy. Her dangly jewelry didn't go away though or the solid coat of makeup she wore daily. How she kept a constant supply of foundation on hand, I had no idea.
"So, do you want me to unpack the clothes…maybe hang them up in the closet?" I stood at the foot of the stairs, holding a bag of multi-colored socks not much bigger than my thumb and baby jumpers in my arms.
"No, no, no. I'll do it. Jacks has to put the dresser together first. I want the clothes in there." She grabbed the bag from me and wobbled up the stairs to the second floor. I tried not to laugh at the view.
"What about the blankets…you want those upstairs too?" I called after her. I figured I'd be safe with blankets.
"No, not yet! Those go in the dresser too," her voice trailed off as she walked down the hall into the spare bedroom turned nursery but I still caught what she said next, "…honestly, I'm surrounded by idiots!"
I counted to ten before taking a deep breath and trying to sound as if I hadn't heard her. "Hey, maybe I'll just go next-door and make lunch for everyone?" I needed an excuse to escape. It was still an hour before noon, but Ana was making it impossible to help. As was her usual way.
"Fine, whatever!" she hollered down the stairs.
Kris was parking the golf-cart in front of the cabin when I stepped back outside. The hot rays of the sun warmed my shoulders immediately. I made a mental note to put my bikini on after lunch and take a quick swim in the lake before I got too caught up in Ana's crazy decorating. With my bandages off, I was finally allowed back in the water.
Poor Kris was already caught in Ana's net. She was unloading more bags and small containers out of the back of the cart and smiled up at me as I approached. It was fun for her - planning for a baby. Half the group was beyond excited. Those of us that had already been parents were torn with conflicting emotions though. I know we were devastated, but we would never admit that out loud. I was happy for Ana and Jacks, truly I was. But her pregnancy was a constant reminder of my own lost children. On the inside, I was loathing the day Ana's baby cried for the first time.
I stood with my hands thrust into the pockets of my jean shorts and took in the view around me. The lodge was a lovely place. Even though we had lost the main building and the greenhouse, the rest of the property was still beautiful. The lake was perfect for the hot summer days and there was more than enough room for everyone to have their own space. I should have felt happy, because I had Connor. But it was becoming harder and harder to shrug off the survivor guilt and the depression. It was on Connor's face too. The dark rings below our eyes never seemed to go away. The longing for the innocent lives we had lost - it was slowly consuming us.
***
Each flick of the small waves exhaled a cool breeze that paired nicely with the refreshing temperature of the lake water. I drifted aimlessly atop a full-length inflatable float with my eyes closed, enjoying the penetrating heat of the early afternoon sunshine. My left elbow dangled slightly over the side of the small raft so that every other wave slapped against it softly. It was strangely comforting and relaxing. Other than my backside, which was an inch or two under the water line, my left arm was the only part of me that was thoroughly wet.
A subtle shift in the waves made me open my eyes and despite the glare of the sun on the water, I caught a glimpse of something dark floating toward me on my right. When I lifted my head up to get a better look, whatever it was quickly sank below the surface. After trying to sit up, the flimsy float bowed beneath me, dipping me lower into the lake. Panicking, my legs had nowhere to go but back into the water as I stared into the darkness beneath me, waiting for whatever I saw to surface again.
I could see Zoey where she lay stretched out on her side at the end of the dock, snoozing in the sun; it wasn't the dog swimming in the water. As the current shifted below me, a strangled sound pushed its way up my throat and escaped out of my mouth just as I pictured the shark from Jaws. This is absurd because I knew there wasn’t a shark in the lake, but my imagination was taking no prisoners and held firmly to the thought that I was seconds away from being torn to pieces by razor-sharp teeth. All of a sudden, a set of hands burst out of the water and grabbed my arm, pulling me into the lake with a loud splash.
I kicked and fought off my attacker under the water and forced myself back up for air. Once I gulped in enough oxygen to breathe, a face surfaced just in front of mine. Bright blue eyes peered at me mischievously beneath a full head of dark hair.
"Bastard! You almost gave me a heart attack!" I screamed at Connor and splashed his laughing face with water. Zoey lifted her head up slightly to gaze at us before stretching and rolling onto her back. She returned to napping with her front legs pointing up at the sky.
"I'm sorry," Connor choked out the words between laughs and watery coughs, "I'm sorry…you just looked too comfortable…I had to mess with ya." He reached forward and grabbed my upper arms, tugging me into his chest.
"Relaxing was the point, jackass!" I struggled in his strong grip but my slight frame was no match against his long and lean one. I let my mouth fill with water and spit it at him, enjoying his shocked expression.
"Did you just spit in my face?" He pulled me tighter into him, sliding an arm around my waist, effectively pinning my chest to his. His fingers began a rhythmic prodding up and down my side and hip.
I squealed with laughter as he tickled me mercilessly while our bodies slid together and bobbed up and down in the water. I tried several times to dunk him, but couldn't push myself far enough away from his grip to get the proper leverage.
The sun beat down on the top of my head, warming my scalp. As I felt his hand move slowly over my hip and tug on the string of my bikini bottoms, I narrowed my eyes at him. "What are you doing?" I gasped as he answered by pulling the material free, tossing it onto the empty float drifting a few feet from us.
"It was in my way."
I lost myself in the sugary-lemon taste of his tongue as he crushed his mouth to mine while his hands expertly roamed around my body. Breaking free just long enough to take a deep breath, Connor pulled me through the water toward the raft and lifted it above our heads, depositing the plastic inflatable behind us, between our bodies and the shore.
"That won't stop anyone from seeing much if they look hard enough." I giggled as his mouth sucked and nibbled my earlobe, slowly working its way down my neck.
"I don't care who sees us. I want you. Now."
His eyes lit up with lust as he pulled me close. Somehow, I missed the moment when he slipped out of his shorts and was pleasantly shocked when our hips met…skin to skin.
"You have a very naughty streak, Kevan O'Connor." I purred into his ear while kicking my feet steadily in an attempt to keep my head above water.
Connor bristled against me and instantly released my waist, using both his hands to cup my face. I ignored the wind that rolled along the top of the lake and let my arms fall from his shoulders as I floated in front of him…mesmerized by his gaze. Drops of water fell from his long, dark lashes as his watery-blue eyes bore into mine.
"Say that again." The need in his voice was husky - sexy.
I tried to cock my head to the side but he held my face firmly in place. Our feet and legs bumped into each other as we were jounced around like human buoys in the middle of the lake.
"You're very naughty," I said with a smile.
"No…" he shook his head slowly and as he did the look of playful lust dissolved and turned into more of a desperate plea. He took a deep breath and searched my face with his gaze before he whispered, "My name - say it again. Please."
With one hand, I reached up to gently stroke his lower lip with my index finger and whispered back, "Kevan O'Connor."
Our mouths met again, as well as our hips, and we pushed and rubbed against one another, hungrily drinking in the taste and feel of each other until the need to become one was unbearable. Forgetting everything, including where we were, I lifted one leg, hooked it around Connor’s waist, and used my arms to steady myself in the water as he gripped my left hip with one hand and slowly eased into me. Instinctually, I tightened around him, moaning at the fullness of him inside me. We rocked against each other, riding the gentle waves of the lake, using our arms to float as best as we could, slowly building up to the overwhelming sensation our bodies were craving.
"God, Riley…" Connor moaned, quickening the pace of each thrust, reaching deeper.
"Yes, oh yes…" I murmured against his cheek before crushing my lips to his.
When I tilted my head back, my hair floated in the water as spasm after spasm tore through the muscles in my groin and vibrated erratically through my thighs. Connor pushed harder into me before convulsing and biting down on his lower lip to keep from crying out. I pulled his face to mine as his body shook and tugged gently on his lower lip with my teeth.
"Oh my God, woman," he panted against my open mouth.
I wiggled my hips against his, refusing to release him. He was still hard inside me and I wanted to enjoy the sensation as long as he would let me.
"You have to stop grinding like that, Riley," his voice cracked slightly, "…or I swear to God I'll com
e again."
I flexed my pelvis rhythmically against him. "Promise?"
CHAPTER four
The swim back to the dock was grueling. My arms and legs were spent; my muscles jerked uncontrollably from our lovemaking session in the middle of the lake. We had treaded the water for nearly an hour while having sex and after spent a considerable amount of time trying to locate Connor's shorts, which we eventually spotted floating a good hundred feet from the middle of the lake.
Several times my head would dip below the water line and I would panic, thinking I might drown only thirty feet from dry land. My only solace was that Connor struggled to swim just as much as I did. When we reached the end of the dock both of us gripped the wooden pillars with relief, ignoring the slimy feel of the wet wood beneath our hands.
"Damn. That was harder than I thought it would be." I leaned my forehead on my arm while Connor rolled over onto his back and floated beside me.
"No joke. You wore me out, woman," he laughed into the warm afternoon breeze.
I smiled against my arm for a moment before taking the opportunity to sneak up on Connor and push him under the water. He came back up sputtering and cursing with a boyish grin on his face. I had already swum a good ten feet from him by the time he surfaced, in an attempt to stay clear of his wandering hands. Only a few more seconds of swimming and my feet would be able to touch the ground. I didn't make it in time.
One of Connor's hands reached out and grabbed the back of my bikini top, pulling the ties out in one deft movement. I had to scramble out of the lake topless, stumbling over smooth stones the size of lemons and broken twigs while Connor laughed behind me, dangling my wet bikini top from his hand.
When I made it to soft dirt, I spun around to face him with my arms crossed protectively around my chest. With a wicked smile on his face, he spun the fabric around on his finger. I set my mouth into a fake pout as I struggled to hold the laughter in.
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