Sitting with the teacher in her tiny Saigon apartment, Matt finally understood why Ba and his mother had made the choices they did. He felt at peace with his past.
When it was time to leave, he embraced the teacher for a long, long moment, trying to find the words to thank her for what she had given him.
* * *
Today, when Matt thinks of his grandmother, he realizes that, like so many people in Vietnam, the war had cost her dearly. She had lost her daughter and other family members. She had struggled daily to survive, working hard into her old age. There must have been many times when she was afraid, many times when she was in danger. And then she had to make the awful decision to give up her grandson.
“I know now that it was an act of courage and love on her part,” Matt says. “My regret is that she never knew how well things worked out for me. I wish we could have stayed in touch after I left the country. I would have treasured that.
“I no longer feel that my birth mother abandoned me when she took her own life. As an adult and as a physician, I understand that she was probably severely depressed,” he says. “I have seen patients who feel so overwhelmed with life that they no longer want to live. Perhaps today my mother could get treatment. But that didn’t exist then. I’ll never really be over her suicide, but I have accepted it. Rather than blame her, I appreciate everything she did for me.”
Matt is a husband and father today and would like to take his children to Vietnam to visit. “I’d like them to feel pride in their Vietnamese roots. I’ll tell them the story of my life and about my Vietnamese family. I’ll tell them about my mother, and that once I had a grandmother just as wonderful as their grandma Mary, and because she loved me so much, she made a plan for me to be adopted so I could have a future.
“I want my children to know that war isn’t just about guns and soldiers, that families get separated and many innocent people are killed. But even in the middle of war, sometimes good things happen. In this war, there were people trying to help kids like me. I’ll tell them I was one of the lucky ones, because I was able to escape and I had a wonderful family waiting for me.
“I love my adopted country and I’m proud to be an American. But I will never forget that my American heart is half Vietnamese.”
Matt and his wife, Laura, are the proud parents of Christian and Kate
AFTERWORD
POSTSCRIPT ON PEOPLE IN THE BOOK
Matt Steiner is an emergency room physician in Indiana. His wife, Laura, is also a practicing physician. They are the parents of Kate and Christian. When Matt and Laura married, Matt’s brothers were his groomsmen.
Mary Steiner has remarried and is now Mary Psolla. She still lives in the family home in West Liberty, Ohio. Matt’s brothers and their families are close by.
John Williams, former president and CEO of Holt International Children’s Services in Eugene, Oregon, is now director of the Peace Corps in Thailand. He was a guest at Matt and Laura’s wedding.
Glen Noteboom lives in Palm Springs, California. He recently retired from his job of doing adoption home studies for Holt and other agencies.
Bob Chamness is deceased.
Matt’s teacher, Miss Anh, and Tai’s mother, Lan, are real people whose names as well as identifying details have been changed, both to protect them and to respect their privacy.
OPERATION BABYLIFT
For many Americans, the rescue of the orphans airlifted from Saigon was the one bright spot in the otherwise bleak landscape of the Vietnam War. Like Matt, the children arriving in the United States, Canada, Australia, and throughout Europe via Operation Babylift were instant celebrities.
An American crewman feeds one of the babies aboard an Operation Babylift flight
In three days’ time, planes dispatched by the American government and by private agencies, such as Holt International and Friends For All Children, airlifted to safety approximately 2,300 orphaned children, almost all of whom had already been assigned to adoptive homes abroad. President Gerald Ford flew to San Francisco to greet the first Babylift plane and carry the first orphan onto American soil.
The airlift had no precedent in history. Americans and people of other nationalities had adopted European and Korean orphans after World War II and the Korean War, but their passage to their new homes had been arranged by the agencies sponsoring the adoptions.
INTERNATIONAL ADOPTION
When the American government got involved in Operation Babylift, some people questioned the idea of removing orphaned children from their homelands to grow up in countries where they would be minorities and possibly be subjected to discrimination.
But this risk had to be weighed against the prospect of leaving these children in a country lacking resources to care for them. Far more children died of malnutrition, injury, illness, and neglect than ever got into stable care and finally to adoptive homes abroad. International and Vietnamese humanitarian groups, including Catholic and other religious orders, tried to help the children. Their efforts were heroic, but never enough. In some remote orphanages, where malnutrition was rampant, it was not uncommon for every single child to die when there was an outbreak of measles, dysentery, or one of many other diseases prevalent in poor nations.
The relief agencies placing children for adoption focused on children with no known relatives. A few, like Holt International, also accepted some children—Matt among them—whose parent or guardian had relinquished the child to the agency.
Most agencies had only the children’s best interests at heart. But many groups got involved in the crush and confusion of the fall of Saigon, and subsequent claims challenged that some Vietnamese children who were airlifted and then placed in adoptive homes were not actually orphans. This remains an area of controversy, even decades later.
Not all children who went to adoptive homes in other countries adapted to their new lives as readily as did Matt. Because of the emotional and physical stress most of them had experienced before they reached stable homes, many have had long-term problems, ranging from ongoing physical problems to disabling emotional and learning problems. Some have suffered from feelings of displacement and isolation. They wonder what happened to their birth families, or they grieve for birth families they remember. Some have not felt accepted by their new families or have suffered imaginary or real discrimination. Still, most recognize that international adoption gave them the opportunity for a new life.
Life was difficult in orphanages during the war because few people were available to take care of large numbers of children (top). But kids had fun, too, like these youngsters learning to ride tricycles (bottom)
THE AMERASIAN CHILDREN
A significant number of the children adopted from South Vietnam were Amerasian, fathered by U.S. servicemen. No one knows exactly how many Amerasian children were born during the Vietnam War. A conservative estimate is 40,000. Because the Vietnamese have always been sensitive to “outsiders,” they can be biased against anyone of mixed race. Some Vietnamese referred to the Amerasian children as bui doi, meaning the dust of life. Because it could be very difficult for mothers to survive economically if they had mixed-race children, they sometimes chose to place their children with agencies that could provide a better life for them in adoptive homes overseas.
Glen Noteboom, an American social worker at the Holt Center, risked his life helping Holt children escape from Saigon in the closing days of the war
Peik Larsen, an Amerasian child at an orphanage near Danang, was reunited on a visit to Vietnam with the Sister who had helped care for him as a baby. Peik grew up in Cambridge, Massachusetts
After the war, some Amerasian children, particularly those without families to protect them, did suffer discrimination. In 1987 the American government sponsored the Homecoming Act, giving permission for Amerasian children and their families to emigrate to America, and more than 22,000 Amerasians resettled here.
STATISTICS OF THE WAR
• Two to three million Vietnamese died
during the Vietnam War (from 1954 to 1975), along with several hundred thousand soldiers and civilians in bordering Laos and Cambodia.
• At least a quarter million South Vietnamese were sentenced to “reeducation” camps after the reunification of the country.
• During America’s involvement in the war, of the 3.3 million Americans who served, 58,000 died and 2,000 were classified as missing in action. More than 300,000 Americans were wounded, many of them disabled for life. These statistics include medical personnel. About 10,000 American women served in the war. The majority were in the military and were nurses.
• The current population of the Socialist Republic of Vietnam is 81 million.
MULTIMEDIA RECOMMENDATIONS
FOR YOUNG READERS
Children of Vietnam, by Marybeth Lorbiecki (Minneapolis: Carolrhoda Books, 1997). A look at the lives of children in contemporary Vietnam, with simple explanations of its culture and history. Lovely color photos. Sweet Dried Apples, by Rosemary Breckler (Boston: Houghton Mifflin, 1996). A touching tale about two Vietnamese children whose village is bombed during the Vietnam War. Vietnam, by Karen O’Connor (Minneapolis: Carolrhoda Books, 1999). An engaging book about the land, the people, and their daily lives. Water Buffalo Days, by Huynh Quang Nhuong (New York: Harper Trophy, 1999). The author recounts in charming fashion his childhood growing up in a Vietnamese village, where his best friend was the family water buffalo.
FOR MIDDLE READERS
Cultures of the World: Vietnam, by Audrey Seah (New York: Marshall Cavendish, 1994). Excellent introduction to the people, their history, and culture. Three books by Bobbie Kalman: Vietnam: The Land; Vietnam: The Culture; Vietnam: The People (New York: Crabtree Publishing, 1996). The author uses simple text and excellent photos to introduce readers to Vietnam. In Vietnam, by Denis J. Hauptly (New York: Atheneum, 1985). Clear explanations of Vietnam’s history, the conflict between North and South, and America’s involvement. The Story of the Saigon Airlift, by Zachary Kent (Chicago: Children’s Press, 1991). Photos and simple text explain the last month in Saigon before it fell to the North Vietnamese. The Land I Lost, by Huynh Quang Nhuong (New York: Harper Trophy, 1986). Fifteen tales by the author of Water Buffalo Days about his boyhood in South Vietnam. (The author is now a U.S. citizen.)
Two books, The Vietnam Antiwar Movement in American History, by Anita Louise McCormick (Berkeley Heights, N.J.: Enslow Publishers, 2000), and The Vietnam War, by Roger Barr (San Diego: Lucent Books, 1991), work well with The Vietnam War: A History of U.S. Involvement, by John M. Dunn (San Diego: Lucent Books, 2001) to provide an overview of America’s war in Vietnam, offering clear explanations about the ground war, the politics, and the protests back home in America.
FOR MATURE READERS
Dispatches, by Michael Herr (New York: Avon Books, 1978). A classic journal of war. In Country, by Bobbie Ann Mason (New York: HarperCollins, 1986). A coming-of-age novel about a teenage girl whose father was killed in Vietnam and whose uncle is a Vietnam vet. Tears Before the Rain: An Oral History of the Fall of South Vietnam, by Larry Engelmann (New York: DaCapo Press, 1997). Voices of Vietnamese and Americans who were there. The Things They Carried, by Tim O’Brien (Broadway Books, 1998). A collection of twenty-two interrelated short pieces that together form a whole. All relate to the Vietnam War. Some are fiction; some are based on the author’s experiences as an American GI in that war. The Unwanted: A Memoir of Childhood, by Kien Nguyen (Boston: Little, Brown, 2001). A memoir by an Amerasian who now lives in the U.S. about the devastating years following reunification in Vietnam, and the suffering he and his family endured. Vietnam: A History, by Stanley Karnow (New York: Viking Press, 1983). A comprehensive history of the war, with special emphasis on America’s role. Vietnam, Now: A Reporter Returns, by David Lamb (New York: PublicAffairs, 2002) A fascinating journey through modern Vietnam, told by a reporter who covered the war, then went back to live there in 1997 and discovered a whole new country. When Heaven and Earth Changed Places (New York: Doubleday, 1989) and Child of War, Woman of Peace (New York: Bantam Doubleday Dell, 1993), both by Le Ly Hayslip. The author was a village child during the war and grew up to marry an American GI and live in the U.S.
RECOMMENDED WEB SITE
http://www.vvmf.org. Sponsored by the Vietnam Veterans Memorial Fund. Click on “Teach Vietnam” to explore a remarkable Web site that includes history, reflection, photos, and links with other quality, updated Web sites. Very well done and useful for students and educators.
A Web site search for “Vietnam War” and “Operation Babylift” will bring up a variety of sites and information. Keep in mind that groups often have a specific agenda, and it’s possible that not all the information given will be reliable.
VIDEOS
Vietnam: A Television History. This Emmy-winning seven-volume series presents a detailed study of the war and its aftermath. Contains graphic material. Written by Andrew Pearson, produced by WGBH Educational Foundation, Boston. Precious Cargo. Produced for PBS, this documentary follows eight adoptees from Vietnam on their journey back to their homeland in search of their past.
MOVIES
Hollywood has its own versions of the Vietnam War. With the exception of Indochine, which views the coming war from the French perspective (and is in French with English subtitles), all of the notable movies listed here relate stories of American soldiers before, during, and/or after the war.
About the War
Apocalypse Now, Born on the Fourth of July, Coming Home, The Deer Hunter, Full Metal Jacket, Hair (based on the musical of the same name), Hamburger Hill, In Country, Indochine, Platoon, We Were Soldiers. Because of graphic violence, parental discretion is urged.
About Vietnam
Cyclo, The Scent of Green Papaya, Three Seasons, The Vertical Rays of the Sun. These four fine movies have all been produced by Vietnamese directors using Vietnamese actors. They realistically portray Vietnamese culture.
SOURCES
Like many writers whose subject matter has been Vietnam, I found I could not do it justice until I actually visited that tiny country, experiencing for myself the landscape, the culture, the warmth of the people, and the ghosts of war. I believe that firsthand experience has brought accuracy of detail to many passages in this book.
In addition to the invaluable help of eyewitness accounts from Matt Steiner and from men and women I’ve cited elsewhere who were in Saigon and participated in Operation Babylift, I found the following texts helpful: The Fall of Saigon, by David Butler (New York: Simon and Schuster, 1985); Orphans of War, by Rosemary Taylor (London: William Collins Sons & Co., 1988); and Tears Before the Rain: An Oral History of the Fall of South Vietnam, by Larry Engelmann (New York: DaCapo Press, 1997).
I have long been interested in the story of the orphaned children of South Vietnam and in Operation Babylift, and I began collecting materials and interviewing eyewitnesses shortly after the end of the war. In graduate school, I explored American magazine coverage of the Babylift in my thesis, and I repeatedly turned to that thesis for assistance while writing this book. Thus, it, too, was an important source: “Operation Babylift and the Adoption of Vietnamese Orphans: The Coverage Given By Four American Magazines, 1975–1976,” by Andrea Warren (M.S. thesis, University of Kansas, 1983). I also referred to a first-person narrative article I wrote for the May 1999 issue of the journal The World & I titled “The Angels of Vietnam,” in which I related the story of my daughter’s return to Vietnam in search of her own past.
Other sources I consulted include: Cultures of the World: Vietnam, by Audrey Seah (New York: Marshall Cavendish, 1994); Encyclopedia of the Vietnam War, edited by Stanley I. Kutler (New York: Charles Scribner’s Sons, 1996); Fire in the Lake: The Vietnamese and the Americans in Vietnam, by Frances FitzGerald (New York: Back Bay Books, 2002); For Children Cannot Wait, by Susan Carol McDonald, S.L. (Columbus, Ohio: Brown Graphic Press, 1980); A Home for Every Child, by John Aeby (Eugene, Oregon: Holt International Children’s Services, 1986); The
Home Front: Americans Protest the War, by Stuart A. Kallen (San Diego: Lucent Books, 2001); Vietnam: A History, by Stanley Karnow (New York: Viking Press, 1983); “Vietnam Now,” by Stanley Karnow, Smithsonian, January 1996, pp. 34–42; and The Vietnam War Almanac, edited by John S. Bowman (New York: World Almanac Publications, 1985).
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
I am grateful to many individuals for their assistance with this project. I could not have written it without the full cooperation of Matt Steiner, who, in spite of an incredibly busy schedule as a husband, father, and physician, cheerfully worked with me endless hours so we could get the story right. I am also grateful to Matt’s mother, Mary Steiner Psolla, who contributed her memories and a careful record of what happened when; John Williams and Glen Noteboom, formerly of Holt’s Saigon Center, who were part of Operation Babylift; Susan McDonald, a Sister of Loretto, who worked with the orphaned children of South Vietnam and also participated in the Babylift; Mary Nelle Gage, a Sister of Loretto, and Peggy Hammond, volunteers in South Vietnam, for assistance with memories and photos; Barbara Bartocci and Deborah Shouse, who stuck it out with me, week to week; Susie Nightingale, Sandra Lamb, John Aeby, and Latha Meyer for technical help; my agent, Regina Ryan, who was encouraging from start to finish; and my editor at Farrar, Straus and Giroux, Melanie Kroupa, who shared my vision for this book. Finally, I must mention in loving gratitude my husband, Jay Wiedenkeller, who lives the ups and downs with me, and never complains.
PHOTO CREDITS
Courtesy of AP/Wide World Photos
Courtesy of AP/Wide World Photos
Courtesy of AP/Wide World Photos
Courtesy of AP/Wide World Photos
Courtesy of AP/Wide World Photos
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