Lily flopped down beside her. “Nope.”
“Uh, hello, how about Jack?” Julia said, raising her glass.
Gwen made a scoffing sound. “I’m unable to defend my brother, even though our shared DNA should trigger some kind of familial defense mechanism.”
Lily tucked her legs underneath her, not even wanting to add to the conversation. If they only knew how she and Jack had spent New Year’s Eve. She was a hypocrite.
Julia sighed. “Okay, listen, don’t hate me for what I’m about to say…but I love Jack. He’s one of the good guys, too.”
“He walked out on everyone,” Gwen said.
Julia’s eyes filled with tears. “Gwen, you know I love you. I know you have your own, very real and valid reasons to be angry with him, but he did the only thing he could do at the time. He regrets having to leave. He regrets it every day.”
Gwen didn’t say anything, just crossed her arms.
Lily’s stomach churned. She didn’t want to get into an argument with Julia, so she didn’t say anything, either.
“You guys, seriously. The man is tortured. Michael was his twin, and he couldn’t deal…and he…adored Matthew. You know how much, Lily. You know that little boy was his heart and soul.” Julia’s voice cracked and she quickly took a sip of wine. Lily’s heart broke. She wasn’t being a good friend. Their lives were all so tangled and intertwined.
“I’m sorry, Jules,” she whispered, quickly wiping a tear. Her friend had suffered an enormous loss…and Jack…what she’d said about Matthew was so true. Jack and that little boy had a bond that made Lily’s heart ache whenever she remembered the way they were together. Little Matthew would run after him, calling him “Uncle Tack.” She and Jack had often babysat for Julia and Michael. Watching Jack with his nephew had always made Lily think of what a wonderful father he would make.
Gwen blew her nose loudly. “Do you see how my brother makes a mess of everything? He’s the guy you want to hate but just can’t.”
They all laughed.
“I’m not judging you, hon, I’m only trying to… I want you guys to have a second chance,” Julia said. “He was so much younger. Don’t judge him for something that happened so long ago. I’m not the same person I was five years ago. Also, I know something.”
Lily stared at her friend, taking in the sparkle in her eyes.
“Uh, if you know something, speak!” Gwen yelled.
“Keep it down, Maggie is sleeping.” Julia laughed.
Lily sat back down, trying not to show too much interest in whatever Julia knew about Jack.
“Okay, listen, you’re sworn to secrecy,” she whispered, looking over her shoulder in the direction of Chase’s home office.
“Tell us now,” Gwen insisted, lurching forward on the couch.
Lily’s heart was beating super fast, and she wished she could’ve had the wine.
“Jack came to see me last week. He bought the old Sheppard ranch.”
Gwen gasped, and Lily silently cursed the man. She turned the other way and crossed her arms. He bought the old abandoned ranch they were going to buy when they’d saved enough money. He was sending her a message.
“So he’s staying for real,” Gwen said.
Lily clutched her hands together, trying not to ruin this for Gwen. What, he just thought he’d come back here and buy that old place and she’d fall in love with him all over again and then move in?
“I thought this might be a good thing?” Julia whispered, looking at her.
“It’s too late. I don’t care what he’s bought… I’m happy for all of you, though,” she said, shooting Gwen an attempt at a smile.
“Okay, I’m really mad that I’m saying this, but I feel forced to. I guess the DNA thing is kicking in…but Jack…is a good guy. I love him. I’m happy he’s home. I’m pissed at him still and am still seeking petty revenge by irritating him, but he’s changed, Lil. I saw it in his eyes the second he walked through the door Christmas Eve.”
She’d seen it, too. There was a quiet maturity, a depth that hadn’t been there before. Sadness and regret, too. Ugh. Compassion was sneaking its way back in. Nope. “Well, all that is true, but he dumped me. He left. I…sat around in Shadow Creek…”
“Well, I sat along right beside you, except I gained twenty pounds.”
Julia tossed a pillow across the room at Gwen. “How many pillows do you have over there?” Gwen asked.
They all laughed. “We aren’t listening to the weight drama anymore.”
“Yeah,” Lily said. “Done. New Year. Let’s make a resolution. This is the year we get it together, Gwen. We let nothing stop us.”
Her friend gave a determined nod and they all picked up their glasses, clinking. She repeated the resolution in her head. Nothing was going to stop her from having the best year of her life, not even the knowledge that Jack had bought the house they were supposed to start a family in together.
…
“All these clothes are too small,” Gwen muttered, standing in front of the full-length mirror in her room. Jack paused in the open doorway of his sister’s room. She was currently frowning and struggling with a button that looked like it was begging for mercy.
He’d just finished his second week at the chocolate shop from hell. Lily and Gwen were both giving him the cold shoulder. He would have thought that pulling in twelve hour days, saving the two of them from a pile of bills, might have endeared them to him, at least slightly, but no.
He spent the last two weeks taking orders from his sister, who was snippy and clearly defensive over her friend. Despite their glacial treatment, he was relieved to see the place was starting to take shape. He wanted them to succeed. He wanted this to be the beginning of a new life for all of them. His best friend Chase and sister-in-law Julia had found a way to move on. He was going to find a way to get Lily back.
“So why don’t you go buy a bigger size?”
Her sharp intake of breath followed by the squinting of her eyes told him that wasn’t exactly an option she wanted to entertain for some reason.
“I didn’t ask for your advice. And if I buy a bigger size that means I’m admitting defeat.”
“Defeat over what? I think buying a bigger size means buying the right size and sparing yourself the drama in front of the mirror.”
He ducked as she threw a pillow at him. “You don’t get it, Jack. Leave me alone,” she said, doing some frantic rummaging through her closet. He sighed, walked into her room, and sat on the edge of her bed, reminding him of what he used to do when they had all lived under this roof together. Except Michael wasn’t here anymore. Michael would have known what to say to her. He’d never been the one to dish out advice; he’d always provided Gwen with comic relief, while Michael would always have something wise to say. He looked around the room, guilt hitting him, knowing Gwen had moved back home after he left town. He owed her. He frowned as she continued whipping through the hangers.
“I couldn’t even tell you gained weight. You’re beautiful.”
“You couldn’t tell because you’d been away so long you forgot what I looked like,” she said, pulling out some Pepto-Bismol-pink shirt. He didn’t think he should tell her it was probably a good thing her clothes didn’t fit, if that’s what she intended on wearing.
“I have gained twenty pounds. That’s at least a dress size.” She hung up the shirt and then pulled out a black sweater dress thing.
He thought of something to say even though this was out of his territory. He owed Gwen. He wanted to fix things for her. He sat up when he had an idea. “Listen, you want to lose weight? I can help.”
She turned around, arms crossed. A part of him was afraid of the glint in her eyes. Whatever, he owed her.
“Really?” Her voice was flat and unenthused.
An internal warning bell was going off in his mind, but he continued anyway. “You probably shouldn’t be making chocolate or working in a chocolate shop all day.”
He really should hav
e stopped there, but because she didn’t say anything, just sort of stood there, eerily still, he kept on talking. “You should go running with me instead of eating pies with Mom and Dad.” He did stop speaking when her eyeballs looked as though they were ready to spring from their sockets and her cheeks turned the color of the red sweater she was wearing.
“I think you need to leave this room, Jack, and consider never. Speaking. To. Me. Again.”
Crap. “Gwen.”
She held up a hand. “Not talking to you. I didn’t speak to you for five years. I think I’m prepared to go another five.”
Hell. “I didn’t mean to piss you off.”
“No, you just sit there all”—she waved a hand up and down in his general direction—“all buff and judgmental, calling me fat—”
“What! Whoa. Back it up there. I never said you were fat.”
Now her arms were crossed and she was tapping a foot. “You did. You have no idea!”
He held up his hands. He knew when to back down. He also knew his sister could deck a man and bring him to his knees. He knew this, of course, because he’d been the one to teach her how to deck a guy before she’d started dating in high school. “I didn’t say you were fat. You were complaining you couldn’t fit in your clothes, so I told you to buy a bigger size. You said no. Then I told you that you were beautiful. You didn’t agree. So then I told you how to drop some weight if you wanted to. I never said you were fat. I think you look normal.”
She threw up her hands and marched to her door, holding it wide open. “Whatever, Jack. This is why I need my own space. You should know that I’m moving out. Actually, I’m moving in with Lily.”
Uh, no. He was planning on moving in with Lily. Or have Lily move in with him, once he had the ranch all fixed up. Lily just didn’t know it yet. “She didn’t say anything to me about that.”
Gwen rolled her eyes. “I think she’d need to be speaking with you in order to tell you about her living arrangements.”
“Thanks.”
“Besides, this is my time now, Jack. You’re back home. You can live with Mom and Dad.”
He paused for a moment. “Gwen, I’m not living here. I bought the old Sheppard ranch.”
For a second, he thought about covering his head. His sister looked like she was about to kill him. Her expression reminded him of the time he’d told Cooper Higgins that she secretly liked him in high school. He’d thought he’d been helping. Gwen had made it very clear, that no, he hadn’t helped. Right before she’d jumped and tackled him.
Instead of tackling him, she took a deep, shaky breath. Then she squeezed her eyes shut and counted to ten out loud, her voice tight and snappy sounding. When she reached zero, she opened her eyes and glared at him. “So, you’re back, but not really back, because you plan on ditching me again and doing whatever you want.”
“Mom and Dad don’t need babysitters; they’re barely seniors.”
She rummaged around in her closet again, her movements rigid and stiff. “I can’t leave them alone.”
“Why not?”
She spun around. “Because. Because…of everything! I don’t even know what to say to you anymore.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means I’m still pissed off at you for ditching us. You left me here with Mom and Dad. I’m supposed to be pretending like everything is fine, but it’s not. You hurt so many people. You screwed us all over, Jack.”
He leaned forward, resting his forearms on his thighs. He knew this day was coming. “I know, and I’m trying to make up for it.”
“Have you talked to Lily?”
Of course, he wasn’t about to tell her that Lily had, in fact, spoken to him, the night they slept together. “She doesn’t exactly want to speak to me.”
She snorted. “Can you blame her?”
He shook his head. “Of course not. But I need to explain.”
“What’s left to explain? You took off because…of what happened. Now you’re back. It’s too late. I hate to say it to you, because despite everything, I love you, but it’s too late, Jack.”
He winced. “Because she found someone else?” Of course that thought had been following him around for the last two weeks.
She shook her head. “Because of you. You destroyed Lily. I was ashamed to be your brother after you left. Something happened to her,” she whispered, and her eyes flooded with tears. His gut churned as he watched her. He didn’t blame her for being ashamed, but he wanted to know what had happened to Lily.
“You mean her dad? I know he had a stroke.”
“Before that.”
“What do you mean something happened to her?”
She shook her head and quickly wiped her tears. “I don’t know. She was different. She went away for a few months and…something was different. I thought at first she was depressed. But it was more. It took her a full year to even get our friendship back.”
He held his head in his hands. God, he hated himself.
“I had to work on a friendship that was perfect until you destroyed it. I had to deal with Michael and Matthew being dead. I had to watch Mom and Dad cry. You were gone. Julia was gone. I was left here alone. And then Dad had cancer. Do you have any idea what it was like around here? Don’t you think I wanted to run? I couldn’t. It was me and Chase, and he was already dealing with his own crap because of that witch of an ex of his and poor little Maggie. It was hell, here,” she hissed. “I wanted my big brother,” she said, and her voice cracked, splitting his heart in half.
He stood, not knowing if she’d welcome him or not. He grabbed the hanger she was holding, tossed it on the bed and then drew her into a hug. She cried all over his shoulder until his shirt was wet, but he didn’t complain.
“I’m trying so hard to be angry at you,” she whispered.
He nodded. “I know. I deserve it. I promise I’m here for good, okay? I’ll help with Mom and Dad. I’m so sorry, G.”
“I’m going to help you with Lily,” she said, pulling back slightly, looking very much like the kid sister who was always plotting something that turned catastrophically bad.
He cleared his throat. “What are you talking about?”
“I’m going to be your matchmaker.”
Dread curled into a tight ball in his stomach. “No.”
“Yes. We Baileys aren’t quitters. We need to stand together, just like we used to.”
“So you’re not mad at me anymore?”
“Still mad, but I’m going to work on it. I missed you so much, Jack. I’d still rather have you back and take out my anger on you by irritating you when you least expect it.”
“Thanks.”
“And I also vow to get you and Lily back together. You were meant for each other.”
“Please don’t help,” he choked.
She nodded against him and then proceeded to wipe her face all over his shirt.
“That’s gross, Gwen.”
“I know. Payback.”
Chapter Five
Lily ran down Main Street as fast as she could, trying to ignore the overwhelming urge to throw up her breakfast. Large mounds of snow clung to the curbs, and the occasional patch of ice kept her from going at top speed.
She hadn’t been able to get out of bed this morning; she felt as though she’d been hit by a truck. When she had finally managed to get up, the overwhelming waves of nausea had hit. Of course that made her worry she was coming down with something, and that could not happen. They were working so hard to get their shop open in time for Valentine’s, and the last thing they needed was Lily down for the count. She was also starving and hoping that Gwen had the foresight to bring some kind of baked item from home. But what she really wanted was olives. Black olives. And truffles.
She stopped, sliding slightly on a patch of ice. Snow fell around her and she stood in the middle of an almost empty sidewalk of downtown Shadow Creek as panic immobilized her. Her mind whirled as furiously as the winter wind whipping snow around
her.
Olives and truffles, normally a repulsive combination…except the last time she craved olives…she had been pregnant with Jack’s baby. Five years ago, a month after Jack left, she had realized she was pregnant. Six weeks after that she’d had a miscarriage. She had never been more alone or afraid.
Tears filled her eyes and she raised her freezing hands to cover her eyes for a moment. This couldn’t be happening again. Not now. Not when she was trying to launch a business…and didn’t want to have anything to do with Jack.
She took a deep breath and tried to think rationally. It was a coincidence. Big deal, she was now craving a giant jar of black olives, which she normally abhorred. It didn’t mean anything. Big deal that she was nauseated this morning. Big deal she’d had heartburn for the past week…oh my God.
But they had used protection…
She slowly walked toward their shop, not knowing how on earth she was going to get through the day without arising Gwen’s suspicions. Or Jack’s. He’d be here today for sure. She needed to get through the day, then drive out of town to buy a pregnancy test. Her hands were trembling and her stomach churned painfully. Maybe this was all a bad coincidence. She’d never experienced nausea last time. So there, maybe that was a sign. Maybe she was coming down with a stomach bug…the kind that made you crave olives and chocolates.
She took another deep breath before pulling open the door to their shop, vaguely aware she was now late. Sure enough, the lights were on in the kitchen and Gwen was already here. She needed to stop thinking about this.
She couldn’t be pregnant. They’d used a condom. She planted her hands in her hair and squeezed her eyes shut. This couldn’t be happening to her; she couldn’t do this again. She couldn’t experience the loss again.
“Hey, Lil!” Gwen came out of the kitchen and greeted Lily as she walked through the front door.
“Hey, I’m sorry I’m so late,” she said, throwing her coat and purse behind the counter. “I know I’m supposed to be here early today.” She quickly tied an apron around her waist and avoided eye contact with her best friend. Her mind was whirling, and she tried to look normal while at the same time thinking about the possibility of being pregnant. She had gone through everything alone last time. Jack being here meant nothing. In fact, his presence made things so much more complicated, because if she was pregnant, there was no way she’d be able to keep what had happened the last time a secret from him.
The Baby Bombshell (Shadow Creek, Montana) Page 5
