by Afton Locke
“Shelley.” The word rasped out of him. “Oh my God. What have I done?”
She didn’t answer. The blood on his fingers stained the white tank top he wore so it looked like hers. He had to lick her neck. Heal it over like he had the mating bond. He could heal her, couldn’t he? He bent his head. Extended his tongue. Before he could reach her, someone pulled him away. He sniffed. Curtis. Angry Curtis.
Maybe the other man did this to her. Always jealous. Alan’s head buzzed, and his stomach wavered from the sickening smell of blood. Too weak to fight him. Dragging him away.
The world sped up as the rest of the pack pushed in. Other men pulled him away, too. So far away he could barely see her anymore. He extended his hands until his arm sockets ached. Waved at the air like a restrained toddler. His heart hammered faster than a car with a stuck accelerator, but the beast in him stirred and fell. Even it was too broken to fight now.
“Fucking freak!” Curtis paced, his hands clenched in fists. “Look what he did to her!”
Women screamed. Men growled. The entire kitchen, a seething mass of motion like maggots in a carcass. Several gathered around Shelley. So pale. God, her lips so blue. Broken. Trying to fix her.
A wild-eyed Derek looked at her and then Alan. “Why would he do such a thing? They’re mates.”
“He’s an unpredictable freak. That’s why,” Curtis snarled.
“Call the paramedics, please!” Barbara cried. “We can’t fix her.”
“No. We can’t let outsiders know what we are,” Derek exclaimed while Barbara pressed a wad of paper towels to Shelley’s bleeding neck. “Where’s our pack healer?”
“On vacation,” Rand said.
“Effing great,” Derek said. “Does anyone have needle and thread handy?”
“I have an emergency mending kit in my purse.” Barbara’s face paled. “D-do you want me to sew her up?”
“Yes,” Derek said. “Brett, close the diner. I don’t want any tourists to see this.”
Not her, Alan wanted to growl. The conceited wolf wasn’t Shelley’s friend anymore, and he’d never liked the smell of her.
Liana took the paper towels from Barbara. “The bleeding has slowed.”
“Good,” Derek said. Then he gave orders to perform the impromptu surgery.
“Needs me,” Alan cried. “Needs her mate.”
“Over my dead body,” Curtis said. “Lock him up before he kills someone else.”
After grabbing a bottle of whiskey from the storeroom, Liana applied some to Shelley’s neck. Barbara, looking as pale as Shelley, threaded her needle.
Alan stopped fighting and sagged in his restrainer’s arms. “Let me hold her hand,” he sobbed. “Please.”
“Let him,” Barbara said. “It can’t hurt. Besides, I won’t be able to concentrate with him bawling like that.”
“All right,” Derek agreed. “But keep him restrained.”
As soon as the men dragged him toward her, he grasped her hand. So fragile. So cold. As if she’d already passed on.
Please don’t die. Please don’t die.
Clammy nausea pressed around him as he watched the needle weave in and out of Shelley’s flesh. The same spot where he’d given her the mating bite last night. Her moans of ecstasy in the truck haunted him. So beautiful in her dress at their candlelight dinner. The softness in her hazel eyes when she told him she loved him. Memories tumbled through his mind in pieces with no logic or order.
Logic. He may never be able to program software again. To think he sweated losing his boring job. Nothing mattered but her. He caressed her fingers, testing the length of each bone between his thumb and forefinger. Her skin felt soft but tough from the hard work she did.
Why hadn’t he flown home this morning as he’d originally planned? He knew a beast lived inside him—a dangerous weapon that could detonate at any time. The moon shone past half-full now, too. In Florida, his beast seemed to stay active through the whole damn lunar cycle. He’d stayed to protect Shelley from Starwood, but Curtis was right. He presented a much bigger danger to her than anything they could do.
If only he could erase everything, beginning with his trip down here. He could have talked to Dad on the phone or through videoconferencing. She’d always been too good for him. He’d been delusional to think she could ever be his.
He had to get back to northern Virginia before he hurt someone else.
“Almost done,” Barbara said.
Shelley’s fast, shallow breaths slowed and evened out. Alan’s heartbeat finally slowed, too, clearing his mind. Luckily, she slept. He couldn’t handle seeing the accusation in her eyes yet.
The kitchen door burst open, and Eileen, Shelley’s mother, rushed in. Her face and knees crumpled at the sight of her daughter on the floor in a pool of blood. Alan avoided her gaze, sure she’d treat him like Curtis when she found out what he’d done.
“My baby!” she shrieked, pulling at her hair, which was darker and shorter than her daughter’s. “Oh God. What happened?”
Derek gripped both her arms, preventing her from falling. “We’re going to get to the bottom of it once she’s stabilized.”
“All done,” Barbara said, tying off the thread and cutting it. When Liana handed her a bandage, she placed it over the wound.
“Let’s get her home, so she can rest,” Eileen said.
Derek sent two men to load her into the woman’s car and see them safely to her home. Letting go of her hand was the hardest thing Alan had ever done. What if she died? What if he couldn’t be with her when she took her last breath?
“Good job, Barbara,” Derek said, squeezing her shoulders as she mopped up the blood. “I nominate you as the pack’s backup healer.”
“Thanks.” When she looked up from wringing a bloody rag into the nearby bucket, her face was green. “I’m not so sure, though. I think I’m gonna be sick.”
“Me, too,” Liana said. “First the fire and now this.”
Derek inclined his head toward the door. “Dining room. Pack meeting.”
Alan’s stomach sank. The time for pack justice had arrived. He squared his shoulders as two men led him out like a prisoner and sat him at one of the tables. Whatever his punishment would be, he’d take it like a man.
“Should we tie him up?” one asked Derek.
“Not necessary,” Alan said.
Derek and Curtis sat with him at the round table. The other pack members sat nearby.
“All right,” Derek said. “What happened. Curtis, you first.”
“Isn’t it clear?” The wolf shot Alan a scowl. “He got pissed off and threw a knife at Shelley.”
Curtis’s nasty words leading up to the attack had cut Alan deeper than any knife could have, but admitting it would make him sound like a baby.
“I don’t believe he’d throw a knife at his mate,” Derek said. “What or who pissed him off?”
Curtis tossed his head. “We exchanged a few words. Everyone was pretty uptight after the fire.”
“Did he throw the knife at you?” the Alpha asked.
“How should I know?” His shoulders twitched, as if chasing off a fly. “It flew so fast.”
“Did you duck?” Derek jabbed a finger into the man’s breastbone. “So help me, Curtis, if you don’t tell the truth, I’m going to punish you, too.”
“Can’t remember. I might have.”
Coward. Alan would have jumped in front of her to save her life. He would die for her. Curtis’s gut reaction to save his own hide didn’t surprise him.
Derek looked to Alan next. “Your turn. What happened?”
“I was exhausted from the fire and trying to get out the breakfast orders. Curtis walked in and gave me a bunch of crap about mating with Shelley. I lost control and threw the knife at him. He ducked, and it ricocheted off the door, hitting her.”
“I believe you,” Derek said. “Sounds like an unfortunate accident.”
�
�Accident, my ass! That crazy nut tried to kill me.” Curtis pounded the table with his fist. “Throw him out of the pack right now. If you don’t, I will.”
Other voices in the room supported his suggestion, but Derek growled a warning. “I’ll give the orders around here.”
Alan raised his hand. “No need. I canceled today’s flight, but I’ll be out of here as soon as I can book another one.”
“Don’t go yet.” The Alpha appraised him with narrowed eyes. “Shelley predicted we’ll need you against the Starwood threat. When she recovers, I’ll let her decide your fate.”
“Say what?” Curtis argued.
Derek eyed Alan and Curtis. “And you’re both ordered to stay away from each other.”
On numb legs, Alan hobbled out to his car. Nothing to do now but wait at his father’s house for Shelley’s verdict. He wished Dad hadn’t lived to see his son become the world’s biggest failure.
Hopefully, she’d dream up the worst punishment imaginable. Probably deserved to have his balls cut off for threatening her life. He hoped she’d decide soon.
If she lived.
***
The next morning, Shelley lay in her bed, still weak from the loss of blood. A handmade quilt with motifs of orange fruits, leaves, and blossoms covered her. When she’d woken up, she hadn’t remembered anything except the grove fire. How had her neck gotten cut?
Mom had served her breakfast on a tray and told her everything, including Alan’s involvement. As her strength returned, so did her own memories—the angry words, the knife flying through the air.
Oh, Alan. Why? Couldn’t you have stopped yourself?
Her concern had less to do with her injury than fear of what the pack would do to him. He’d kept telling her he was dangerous and couldn’t be trusted, but she’d always refused to believe it.
Her mother had told her Curtis and several others were on a witch hunt. Thank goodness Derek had a level head.
“They’re here,” Mom said, poking her head in her bedroom door.
“I want to see Alan alone,” Shelley replied.
“Are you sure that’s wise, honey?”
“I insist.”
A few minutes later, the door opened and Alan drifted in as gently as a wisp of smoke. His shoulders and head were so hunched he looked half his normal size. She could hardly believe he was the same person as the enraged man who’d thrown the knife. Tears flowed down her cheeks. Last night during the mating bond, they’d had it all. Love. A beautiful future. Her dreams were gone now. They’d leaked out on the diner floor with her blood.
“Come closer, Alan,” she said, extending her arm. “Look at me.”
He stepped to the side of the bed and sat on the edge of it. When he finally looked at her, his cheeks were stained with tears, too.
“God, Shelley. I’m so sorry.” He lifted her hand, kissed it, and pressed it to his cheek. His tears, warm as blood, flowed across her skin.
“Don’t cry. It was an accident,” she said, clearing her throat to steady her voice. “And I’m feeling stronger. I’m going to live.”
“I’m so thankful.” He laid her hand gently on the quilt. “Derek wants you to decide my fate. Don’t hold back.”
“Curtis caused the incident,” she said. “I can’t punish you. I love you.”
“Don’t love me.” He turned his head as his shoulders shook with a silent sob. “Whatever you do, don’t love me. I don’t deserve it.”
“I can’t help it. You’re my mate, and I believe the good in you.” She caressed his wet cheek. “I’m not giving up on you, damn it!”
“You’d change your mind if the beast in me actually killed somebody. But I’m not going to stay and let that happen. I was a fool to even try.”
She threaded her fingers through his. “Listen to me, Alan. Lying here has given me a lot of time to think.”
“Yeah?” His chocolate-brown eyes, wary and dark with pain, looked at her.
“First, it drove me crazy to lie still.” She plucked at her nightgown. “I realized I work too hard.”
“You do.” He stroked her thumb. “You’re always taking care of everybody else. It’s your turn to be taken care of.”
She gazed out the window. “I guess I never forgave myself for what happened on prom night.”
He squeezed her fingers. “What happened then was my fault, not yours.”
“The second thing I realized is love can heal you, Alan,” she said, gazing at him again.
“I doubt it.” He shook his head so hard, the ends of his bandana flapped.
“I came up with a theory.”
His full lips curved into a tender smile, but his eyes were wary. She refused to let his skepticism dampen the excitement beating in her chest.
“Get Derek up here. I want him to hear this, too.”
When he left to get the Alpha, she gripped the quilt. They had to believe her. She wasn’t about to let go of her true mate, and the fire last night proved the pack needed him more than ever.
The men entered. Derek sat on a Windsor chair in the corner while Alan resumed his seat on her bed.
“You would never intentionally harm me or your father, would you?” she asked her man. “Even if you lost complete control.”
He shrugged. “I’d like to think not, but who knows? When I lose control, I lose it.”
“You can’t hurt us because we’re part of your pack. I’m your mate, and Don is your father.”
“The pack hates me.”
“When I say pack, I don’t mean Moonlight. You’ve never been part of it, or the old one, because they’ve always rejected you.”
Derek looked down but didn’t argue with her.
“What can I do for you?” Alan smoothed her quilt. “Do you need anything? Magazines? Tea?”
She grabbed his arm. “Listen to me. This is important.”
“The only thing I can do is go back north where this shit doesn’t get triggered.” He jumped off the bed and paced.
“What I’m trying to say....” Still weak, she paused to catch her breath. “Is if Moonlight pack fully embraced you, you’d be no danger to it.”
“I’m not going to risk staying around long enough to find out.”
“You have to,” she insisted. “If not for me, for the pack.”
He shook his head. With downcast eyes, he kissed her forehead. The brush of his bandana on her skin reminded her of the other times they’d kissed. She’d rather slit her throat back open than lose him.
“Take care, Shelley,” he murmured. “I’ll always love you, wherever I am.”
After a last squeeze of her hand, he walked toward the door. If he walked through it, she’d never see him again. She had to try her experiment. If it succeeded, he might stay, but if it failed, Derek might do worse to him than exile him from the pack. She might even endanger herself again.
The hardest risk of all was losing his love. Watching it turn to hate. But, she had to do it for him and the pack. She believed so strongly in love, she decided to try.
“Coward,” she said in the snarliest voice she could muster. “Go ahead and walk out.”
He turned his head, his eyes filled with hurt. His mouth opened, as if he were going to say something.
She bit down on a knuckle. “I always liked Curtis better, anyway. He has a bigger dick.”
Rage, pain, and confusion flashed through his eyes. Instead of opening the door, he flung it open. Good. Her ploy was working. Her limbs trembled beneath the quilt because hurting him felt worse than the knife slicing into her neck.
Derek stood. “Shelley, I don’t think it’s a good idea to taunt him.”
“What’s the matter, Scabs?” she asked, ignoring her Alpha. “Getting hot under the collar? Why don’t you finish me off, you miserable freak?”
“Why are you…acting…like Curtis?” he bit out. “I thought you loved me.”
His shoulders heaved, and he
gripped the doorframe, looking as if he were about to shred the boards to splinters with his bare hands. Fear gnawed her spine. What if her theory was wrong? What if he lost control and lunged at her? Derek would surely kill him on the spot. No, she’d gone this far. She had to see it through.
Now, for the final thrust.
“Don’t tell me you believed when me I said I really wanted you in high school.” She even tossed her hair, reliving the arrogant beauty queen she’d once been. “I played a joke on you on prom night, and I’ve been playing you ever since you got here.”
She gripped the quilt until her knuckles turned white. Alan roared, letting out a primal howl so pain ridden it stood the hairs on her neck on end. Her breath froze in her lungs as she watched him. Even Derek’s eyes looked twice their normal size. If her mate was going to attack her, he’d do it now. He froze, too, breathing hard as fangs popped through his lips.
The door banged behind him as he ran from the room. Shaking, Shelley closed her eyes and let out the breath she’d been holding. He’d passed the test.
Derek raced to the window after the front door slammed, shaking the house. “You might have asked my permission before trying something so dangerous.”
“The point is he didn’t hurt me. The pack must fully accept him. Then we’ll never have to fear him.” She held out her hands to him. “Aren’t I always right?”
He nodded. “Yes, but if you’re wrong about this, he could hurt someone else.”
“Then I take full responsibility,” she said. “Talk to the others, especially Curtis. If I can’t live with my mate, I’m not sure I want to live at all.”
“Don’t say that.” Derek stepped closer and squeezed her foot through the quilt. “You’re one of our most valuable members.”
“I mean it,” she shot back. “And after last night’s fire, the Starwood pack is an even bigger threat than I first thought. We need his fighting skills.”
Derek slipped his hands into his pockets. “We have plenty of strong men.”
“Ones that will fight to the death without thinking?”
