When the memories became too much and the emotion choked him to silence, Eli reached out and touched him on the shoulder. ‘Go on, son,’ he urged kindly. ‘Sometimes it’s good to get things out in the open. If you keep ’em buried deep, they’ll only drive you crazy.’
It seemed like an age before Davie got up from the table and began pacing the floor, head bent and his heart aching. ‘She tried to stop him from leaving, but he wouldn’t listen. He’d had enough. I thought he was being too cruel, but I’ve thought about it a lot, and I’ve come to realise how he must have felt.’
‘So your dad left, did he, son?’
‘Yes.’ Davie nodded. ‘Before he went, they had an argument on the stairs. Grandad was there…he lashed out in anger. Mam was fighting and unsteady, and then she just fell…tumbled all the way down the stairs. Dad tried to help her but she wouldn’t let him. She seemed all right though…not hurt or bleeding or anything like that.’
In his mind’s eye he could see it all happening, every small detail, hear every angry word. ‘Grandad told her to go and stay with one of her boozy friends, because he was too old and frail to put up with her any more. He wanted me to stay, but I wouldn’t. I wanted to be with her. We went to this man’s house… she thought he would put us up, but he told us to clear off, that he wanted nothing to do with her.’ Shamed, he bowed his head, and for a moment it seemed he might not go any further.
Coming back to the table, he sat down without a word. After a while, he looked up at the older man, his eyes haggard and tearful, and his heart turning over and over. ‘Mam said we should go to the church – that someone would help us there. We got as far as the woods,’ he whispered, ‘when…she…’ He dropped his gaze and composed himself. ‘She died, Eli,’ he said in a heartbreaking tone. ‘My mam died, and there was nothing I could do.’
Suddenly, he covered his face with his arms and began to sob.
‘My mam died,’ he kept saying. ‘She left me – and there was nothing I could do…nothing.’
Wisely, Eli made no move. Instead, he let Davie cry it all out. He watched and waited, and his old heart wept alongside the boy.
After a while, Davie wiped his face and gave a long, shuddering sigh. ‘I’m sorry, Eli. I’ve always been able to keep it inside before.’
Eli brushed aside his apology. ‘Then it’s time you let it all out,’ he said gently. ‘No man can bear such grief on his own, let alone a young ’un like you.’
Feeling as though he had shed a great weight from his shoulders, Davie went on, ‘For almost two years I went from place to place – looking for my dad, I think. I never settled anywhere, was always on the run, not knowing where I was going, or even who I was any more.’
‘And did you find your father?’
Davie shook his head. ‘No. I even went to Ireland, but it was like looking for a needle in a haystack.’ He recalled the long, weary days when he trudged the streets asking questions and getting no answers. ‘It’s as though he disappeared from the face of the earth.’
‘And then you found your way here.’ Eli felt privileged that Davie was confiding in him.
Davie nodded. ‘I couldn’t stay with any job for more than two minutes,’ he confessed. ‘I just kept moving. Sometimes I didn’t even know where I was.’ He took a moment to relive those awful times. ‘I became a thief, Eli,’ he said shamefully. ‘I stole food and clothes, and once I nearly got caught by the police. Then I got in with a bad lot. One night they promised me a lot of money to go with them and help break into this big house…The owner was away, they said…A pig of a man, they reckoned. They claimed that one of them had been beaten black and blue by him – put into hospital for weeks, they said.’
‘I see.’ Eli recognised how they were probably just using Davie- taking advantage of his situation. ‘Older than you, were they?’
Davie nodded. ‘By a good many years, I should say.’ But he wasn’t excusing his own part in what happened. ‘I knew they were up to no good,’ he assured Eli. ‘But it didn’t seem to matter at the time.’
‘So you went with them, did you?’ he asked. ‘You broke into this man’s house while he was away?’
Davie sighed. ‘It all went horribly wrong. Mr Graham hadn’t gone away at all; nor, as it turned out, was he an ogre. I found out later that he’d chased one of them off when he caught them hanging about the back of the house. So they had decided to teach him a lesson. They knew he’d be there, all right.’
‘What happened?’
‘They dragged him out of bed and beat him terribly, and when I tried to stop them, they set about me. Some time later, when I came round, the old man was lying on the floor…scarcely breathing.’ Davie had a lump in his throat, recalling the panic he had felt at the sight of the old man sprawled beside him. ‘There was blood everywhere.’
‘So, what did you do?’
‘I tried to help him, but he was so still, and he was cold. I put a blanket round him, but I didn’t really know what I was doing. They’d kicked me in the head and I couldn’t see out of one eye. I kept vomiting, too. Eli, I just lost my wits. I was terrified! I ran…I just ran through the house, and as I shot out of the door, the police were everywhere.’
At first he couldn’t understand why they were there. ‘I thought a neighbour must have called them, then I wondered if the others had shopped me. I tried to get away, but they caught me. I told them what had happened, but they said I’d have plenty of time to explain myself in court. They took my name and then they threw me into the car and drove me to the police station.’
‘And when you went to court, they believed you, is that it?’
Davie shook his head, wincing. ‘I never went to court. I jumped out of the car when we got to the police station. I could hear them shouting for me to stop, but I kept going…I just ran and ran, until I couldn’t hear them any more.’
Eli was shocked that Davie could have gone along with those thugs, and even more saddened by the fact that a man had probably died. ‘Dear God, Davie, what were you thinking of? You should never have run away. The best thing would have been for you to tell the court exactly what you’ve just told me… and then take your punishment.’
‘I know that now. I was scared they wouldn’t listen. Scared they’d hang me for murder.’ He shuddered.
‘So, where did you go?’
Pacing the floor as he talked, Davie went on, ‘I travelled day and night, always looking over my shoulder. They knew my name…they knew what I looked like. I was afraid they’d find me. But then, when a year had gone by, I felt safe. I decided to get a proper job and that’s how I came to be here.’
Putting two and two together, Eli asked, ‘Does Brian Moult know all this? Is that part of the reason why he thinks he has a hold over you?’
Davie told him exactly what had happened, the day he arrived in Blackpool. ‘I took a coach here, thinking that Blackpool was an ideal place to hide, full of holidaymakers and casual work. I was walking along the seafront, saw Billy Joe’s and ducked in here to enquire about a job. Then, just as I was coming through the gates, I saw a police car pull up. Two officers went into the office and I saw them through the window, talking to Mr Moult. Then they came out and I waited for a while.
I wasn’t sure what to do. What if the police had some how followed me here?’
‘Hardly likely,’ Eli said. ‘Unless you told somebody where you were headed. Did you?’
Davie cast his mind back. ‘I don’t think so, but I can’t be sure. Y’see, there was a farm some way back…I worked on the land for a time. The family there fed me and let me stay in the barn. I don’t remember saying anything about my plans. I always keep myself to myself.’
Eli had noticed that, and he had been curious as to why a personable young fellow like Davie would want to keep a distance between himself and those around him; even though he shared a caravan, he was always out first and in last. ‘You’re a loner, son,’ he said kindly. ‘I sensed that from the start.’
Davie admitted, ‘I’ve been on my own for too long, and sometimes I find it hard to talk with people.’ Since that awful night at Derwent Street, followed by the death of his mother, he had been unable to communicate much with anyone. What was the point? They would leave him, wouldn’t they? Sooner or later, everyone would leave. Best to keep yourself to yourself: expect nothing and depend solely on your own resources. If he didn’t stick to that, he’d have spent every waking moment looking over his shoulder, waiting for the next big hurt to come along.
‘So, even though you were worried the police might be on your trail, you still came into the office and asked for work?’
‘I had no choice, and anyway, I made myself believe the police were here on some other errand.’
Eli had been thinking the very same. He wouldn’t be at all surprised if Moult hadn’t used the police against the boy for some devious reason of his own. And with Davie’s next words, his suspicions were strengthened.
‘I was starving hungry, and it was so bitter cold, I couldn’t face the idea of sleeping outside again, and like I said, I couldn’t recall telling anyone where I was headed. I didn’t even know myself, where I might end up. So I took a chance and went after the work.’
He finished, ‘I waited for ages, and when I thought it was safe, I went up the steps to the office, and as I made to knock on the door, I overheard a conversation between Mr Moult and another man. They were talking about some money they’d got stashed away. From what I could gather, they made it by cheating the owner of Billy Joe’s…something about buying cheaper parts and such, and billing the company for twice the amount. They were saying that if they kept on the way they were and nobody any the wiser, they’d be able to ‘‘wrap it all up, and live a life of luxury’’.’
With a triumphant cry, Eli thumped the air. ‘I knew it!’ His suspicions were borne out. ‘I had a feeling he was up to summat, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. Then today, I bluffed him into believing that I knew exactly what he was up to. I was just stabbing in the dark. I didn’t know anything, not really. Oh, but I do now!’
‘Eli!’ Davie was aware of the bitterness between the two men. ‘You promised not to say anything to him.’
‘And I won’t,’ Eli assured him with a mischievous grin. ‘But like the man said, ‘‘there are more ways than one to be rid of vermin’’.’
‘I don’t want him riled,’ Davie added. ‘If he thought I was making trouble for him, he’d have me put away and no mistake.’
‘So, go on then,’ Eli urged. ‘What happened, exactly?’
‘Well, I heard them plotting and planning, and I had half a mind to sneak away and look elsewhere for work. Then the door was suddenly flung open and Brian had me by the collar. He dragged me inside and asked me what I’d heard. I told him I hadn’t heard anything, and that I just wanted work. But he knew I’d heard it all. I think he could tell I was on therun, from theway I looked. He told me the police had just been there, and that they were looking for me. They were turning the country upside down, and all he had to do was pick up the phone and they’d be straight back to take me away. I just panicked – didn’t try to find out if it was true.’
‘Bastard!’ Eli was determined to teach the foreman and his partner-in-crime a lesson. ‘So, he’s been blackmailing you ever since, is that it? Making you do twice the hours and more than your fair share of work?’
Davie nodded. ‘He said he’d keep quiet about me, if I kept quiet about what I’d overheard. But he wanted me here, where he could keep an eye on me. If I ever said a word to anyone, or tried to make a run for it, he swore that he’d track me down…said there’d be no escape. That he’d find meand keep me, until the police came and took me away.’
Eli was beside himself. ‘Well, he won’t get away with it, don’t you worry. I’ll see to that!’
‘No, Eli!’ Davie turned on him. ‘Let it be. I don’t mind the work, not really. Besides, you gave your word not to say anything.’
Eli assured him, ‘Your secret is safe with me, although I’m convinced that at some stage you ought to turn yourself in and tell the police about that night. You can’t live on the run for the rest of your life.’
‘I will.’ Davie had been giving it some thought, too. ‘But not yet. I’m biding my time until I can go in search of the other two. I need them to come with me and tell the truth of what happened.’
The old man gave a wry little laugh. ‘Sorry, son, but from what you’ve told me about that pair, they’re not about to turn themselves in. If that man died, they could be hanged for it.’
Davie turned deathly pale. ‘So, what can I do?’ He was frantic. ‘I’m trapped, but I can’t stay here like this for ever.’
‘There’ll be no need.’
‘How come?’
‘Well, now you’ve confided in me, it’s given me a chance to turn the tables on that bully Moult.’
‘But that would mean putting yourself in danger.’
Eli gave a knowing wink. ‘That’s where you’re wrong, son. You see, there’s nothing he can blackmail me with. But, given what I now know, I can make his life very uncomfortable… if I’ve a mind to.’
Davie was still concerned. ‘If he knew I’d told you, he could cause all kinds of trouble for me.’ He hoped the foreman hadn’t seen Eli come to his caravan.
Eli understood Davie’s fears. ‘Tell me something, lad; if all this hadn’t happened, would you still be scouring the country, searching for your father?’
The youth sighed. ‘No, Eli, I wouldn’t. I’ve given up. I’ve spent nearly two long years searching for him, and now, I think if I spent another two years searching I still wouldn’t find him.’
His voicefell to a whisper. ‘He gave me a piece of paper with the name of a man on it; he said if ever I wanted to contact him, I should get in touch with this man, because he would always know where to find my dad.’
‘And did you?’
Davie shook his head. ‘I never even read it. I were in that much of a state, I lost it. One minute I had it, folded up tight in my pocket, the next, it was gone.’
‘And you’ve no other clue as to where he might be?’
‘None. Unless he went back to Ireland.’ He had long ago given up the idea that one day he would walk around a corner and there would be his father. ‘It’s been so long, Eli. He might have a whole new life – children and such. I can’t help but wonder if he even wants to be found. You see, I didn’t.’
It was the first time that the youth had voiced this truth. He hadn’t even written to Judy, his best pal. Somehow, it got harder, the longer he left it. He’d been in shock, he knew now – a much deeper shock than anyone could understand – and it had lasted a long, lonely time. He hoped she would forgive him.
‘Mebbe he does and mebbe he doesn’t. And mebbe he hasn’t got a regular woman nor children, and doesn’t want them. Mebbe he’s still in love with your mammy.’ Old Eli felt for Davie. ‘Look, son. You must never give up searching for him. In case he doesn’t know, he has every right to find out what happened to his wife, because until then I don’t suppose he can even begin to think about a new life.’
‘You’re right,’ Davie said. ‘That’s why I need to find him. To tell him what happened after he’d gone, and to let him know that I don’t blame him.’
‘Good lad!’ Eli was encouraging. ‘It could be, now that some time has passed, your dad longs to see you as much as you do him. You just have to keep hoping and searching. I also think you should get in touch with your grandad. He may have heard something. Your dad may have contacted him. But first, and most importantly, you need to get right away from here.’
Davie was surprised that Eli could even put such a thing to him. ‘It’s impossible! How can I ever get away from here?’ he asked. ‘You know what Brian Moult is like. He meant every word he said.’
‘You leave Moult to me.’ Reaching into his waistcoat pocket, Eli took out a small pad and a pencil. He began scribbling, advisin
g Davie at the same time. ‘You must get a good night’s sleep, then in the early hours while everyone’s still abed, you’re to quietly make your way to this place.’
Tearing off the top sheet of paper, he handed it to Davie. ‘My old pal’s name is Ted Baker. He farms some hundred acres outside of Bedford, in the area called Goldington. Greenacres Farm is the name of his place.’ He smiled at the memories now flooding his mind. ‘Years back, a fore the war, me and Ted went from farm to farm, working the land and having the time of our lives; until the years caught up with us. When Ted was offered management of Greenacres, he jumped at the chance. Then he got married, and so did I, and in the end, we went our separate ways…though we never lost touch.’
He scratched his head. ‘Mind you, come to think of it, I haven’t heard hide nor hair of him this past year. But then I’m not concerned, because that’s how it’s been. We write every month or so for a time, and then it’ll be a whole year before we contact each other again. Farmers are busy people, and they don’t get too much time for letter writin’.’
‘So, how do you know he’s still there?’ the boy asked.
Eli laughed at that. ‘Because he’s too deeply rooted in the land to do anything else. Farming is all he knows, and all he ever wanted. Old Ted has found his bit of Paradise. Believe me, son, he’ll be there, you mark my words.’
He wrote a second note, and in it he told his old friend that Davie was the hardest-working young man he’d ever come across, and that he needed work and a place to stay. He explained how Moult had got his claws into him, and how, once Davie was safely out of the way, he intended giving the bullying foreman a taste of his own medicine.
He finished the letter by promising that he would make an effort to visit, sooner rather than later, and that he hoped all was well with his old friend. We’ll drink the drink and revisit the old days, he wrote, and when the letter was finished, he folded it over and passed it to Davie. ‘Give this to him,’ he instructed. ‘He’ll help you -I know he will.’
The Loner Page 12
